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Global PokédeX Plus Forums _ PANE Discussion _ RP Grading
Posted by: Falkyn Aug 7 2008, 03:31 AM
IMPORTANT NOTE: You do not have to wait for an RP to be graded to move on to the next one! You do not! Do not!
When an RP is finished, you can submit it for grading here. All you need to provide is a link to the RP, a list of characters involved, preferably with links to their profiles, (if not, provide a listing of their Pokemon and their levels), and a short summary of the RP. A roleplay should have a minimum of 20 posts, excluding OOC content.
A mod will be by momentarily to grade it. The grading system that we (meaning Chore Boy + you guys~) designed goes like this:
QUOTE
No matter what, everyone gets 2 levels, distributed between their Pokemon according to use, as long as they finish an RP. Of course, if they drop out, depending on where, they lose so many of these "free" levels. We need the free ones so that our new, inexperienced RPers still have incentive to RP and improve. An additional level is added for keeping a good amount of activity, for a total of 3 levels.
Next, we have 7 levels that are based on the skill of the RPer. So, these are based on quality of post. They're also divided up between the two Pokemon based on use. This means that our better RPers get more levels, which the should rightfully have.
Finally, 5 levels are awarded based on actual battling. So, basically, how much a Pokemon battles, and how well written the battles are. This is separate from quality of post. If someone battles with a Pokemon even once, they get 1 of these levels. The rest should be mod discretion.
So, this totals up to a possible 15 levels for an RPer. Only 10 can be awarded to one Pokemon though, giving incentive for RPers to catch more Pokemon to add to their teams.
For evolved pokemon:
All pokémon level on a one to one basis with the following exceptions:
Psuedo-Legendaries: These are the Dragons and other Mega Types that are strong and not legendary. You must have a mod's permission to catch one.
Dratini, Larvitar, Beldum, Bagon, Gible, Axew, Deino, Larvesta: No modifier.
Dragonair, Pupitar, Metang, Shelgon, Gabite, Fraxure, Zweilous: .7 modifier
Dragonite, Tyranitar, Metagross, Salamence, Garchomp, Haxorus, Hydreigon, Volcarona: .5 modifier
Also notice that a Pokemon that could evolve but the PC chooses not to, it accrues the same level modifier as if you had evolved it. So, a level 30 Larvitar would take the .7 level modifier as if it were a Pupitar.
Posted by: Earl Aug 7 2008, 01:45 PM
A tale of Mankey, money, and mystery prizes, http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=4125 has been completed.
The Players-
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=3889- http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showuser=2282
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=3871- http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showuser=2272
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=3960- http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showuser=1348
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=3985- http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showuser=2413
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=3961- http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showuser=2030
In the Harrington Cup, 5 trainers learn of a famous competition with fabulous (and mysterious) rewards. Making their separate ways to Petropolis, they enter the tournament and dream of success.
Posted by: Velyoukai Aug 7 2008, 02:45 PM
The Harrington Cup, part one
Overall, somewhat small for an RP, but what really made it odd for me was the abrupt ending. Not sure why you had it cut in half like it was, but no matter. The plot of the RP was pretty decent, and it moved along fairly well with few moments of nothingness. All in all, this is a short, but nowhere near bad RP to start our grading with.
Characters and Levels:
<div class='quotetop' align="center" onmouseover="style.cursor='pointer';" onclick="$(this).next().toggle();$('span', this).toggle();">Earl - Matthew Fletcher (click to <span>show</span><span style='display:none;'>hide</span>)</div><div class='quotemain' style='display:none;'> You happen to be the first of the main presences in this RP, and as the leader/creator of the RP, that's a good thing. I've little issue with your posts themselves save for a personal wanting of more detail, but they're still proving fine enough. You and Gatsby handled the battle well by use of AIM, for which I commend you, though...
Spoiler (click to showhide)
"Little shaky there? Oh well. Neil! Ice Shard, go!" A chunk of ice materialized on Neil's snout, shooting toward the Charmander. Char stood still and let the ice chunk hit him. As it connected, it began to melt, and it did barely anything to Char.
"Doh...Ice move...Ice Move!" Char's eyes began to show fire in them, and he put his head down, and his claws to his side.
...would not happen as such. Charmander do not possess skin of such high temperatures, nor do they have fiery auras that would melt the ice. Cold itself is merely what has a lessened effect on Fire types, so the impact of the ice shard would have still hurt. However, I did not dock anything for this, as it was a minor note.
Overall: Very nice job of handling the RP; I expect you to grow with experience as time goes on.
Points:
- 3 levels for finishing.
- 1 level for post count. While a major poster in this, the RP itself is short, resulting in the lower level.
- 3 levels for overall skill. You're not at all bad at RP'ing, in my opinion, but you've room for improvement.
- 3 levels for the battles you were in. While they were not as detailed as they could have been, they were still decent.
- Total:10/15
Other notes: I'm keeping an eye on you. You see, you're an enabler. You just let your pokemon abuse you like that, and you don't do anything about it. Also, you are invincible. Nothing can kill you, can it?</div><div class='quotetop' align="center" onmouseover="style.cursor='pointer';" onclick="$(this).next().toggle();$('span', this).toggle();">
Squirtlecuno - Ciera Newoka (click to <span>show</span><span style='display:none;'>hide</span>)</div><div class='quotemain' style='display:none;'>You entered 'late' in the RP, and only had a few posts to add. Despite that, I thoroughly enjoyed reading your posts, even the smaller ones that didn't have much to them. I hope to see that you resolve your 'end' post somehow in part two, as that little thing leaves you at a weird position. I can't really see that as your fault though. You have a decent amount of detail in your posts and you don't have any awkward parts, which is always good.
Overall: With a little bit of experience and work, I'm sure that you're going to be a fine RP'er here in Furoh.
Points:
- 1 level for finishing an RP. This would be three like normal, but your RP itself is oddly split in two. Upon the finish of part two, the remaining 2/3 will be added.
- 1 level for post count. You didn't have a good deal of posts in an already short RP, but you were still 'there.'
- 3 levels for overall skill. If this had been a bit longer, I'm sure that you'd have gotten a four here easily. Suffice to say though, the RP was short and you didn't have enough posts to prove your skill.
- 0 levels for battling. Sorry, but no battles means no levels for that.
- Total: 5/15
Other notes: The talking Squirtle isn't a bad idea. Nice to see that you react wisely to others hearing her.</div><div class='quotetop' align="center" onmouseover="style.cursor='pointer';" onclick="$(this).next().toggle();$('span', this).toggle();">
Empoleon Dynamite - Charlie Cinder (click to <span>show</span><span style='display:none;'>hide</span>)</div><div class='quotemain' style='display:none;'>Another late entry, few posts sort of deal, but you're like Squirtlecuno in the sense that while you only had a few posts, they were posts with plenty of detail. The only downer for you would happen to be the 'battle' with Etnie; nothing is there, so there won't be any level points granted for it.
Overall: Again, about the same as Squirtlecuno. You're good and some experience will no doubt make you better.
Points:
- 1 level for finishing an RP. This would be three like normal, but your RP itself is oddly split in two. Upon the finish of part two, the remaining 2/3 will be added.
- 1 level for post count. You didn't have a good deal of posts in an already short RP, but you were still 'there.'
- 3 levels for overall skill: Like Squirtlecuno, you've got a good handle on this. A bit more detail is always nice in all parts, but you have it down fairly well. Longer RP likely would have meant more levels here.
- 3 levels for battling: You handled your one Houndour battle pretty well. A bit skimpy on a few parts, but still quite well. Shame that duel you had with Entie isn't there; that might have gotten you a five here.
- Total: 8/15
Other notes: I think I like Charlie. That's some good confidence she's got.</div><div class='quotetop' align="center" onmouseover="style.cursor='pointer';" onclick="$(this).next().toggle();$('span', this).toggle();">
JGatsby - John 'Gatsby' Madigan (click to <span>show</span><span style='display:none;'>hide</span>)</div><div class='quotemain' style='display:none;'>Ah...the other dominant figure in this RP. Good ol' Madigan. He's a steady character, and you handle him most adeptly, dear boy. Lovely scene with the Cubone, though; I remember the anime episode where one was caught like that, and John's two-face'd-ness is even more amusing. "Now, I don't want to hurt you. I want to be friends! But instead of leaving you to your business, I'm going to beat you up and THEN try to be your friend. It's perfectly logical when you think about i-GET HIM, COBALT!"
Overall: You've a good handle on RP'ing in my books. Like the others, some experience and more detailing will help you in the future.
Points:
- 1 level for finishing an RP. This would be three like normal, but your RP itself is oddly split in two. Upon the finish of part two, the remaining 2/3 will be added.
- 1 level for post count. You posted fine enough. If the RP was longer, you'd likely have the full two points here.
- 4 levels for overall skill. You strike me as someone with a good set of RP'ing mind to you. That sentence makes no grammatical sense, so ignore that aspect. Simple version is that you're good.
- 4 levels for battling. You battled quite frequently, and save for the rather skimpy Cubone fight, they were detailed. Nothing much more to add here.
- Total: 10/15
Other notes: Johnny boy is amusing to me. See the spoiler in Matt's grading for my only battle issue with you.</div><div class='quotetop' align="center" onmouseover="style.cursor='pointer';" onclick="$(this).next().toggle();$('span', this).toggle();">
Etnie - Etnie (click to <span>show</span><span style='display:none;'>hide</span>)</div><div class='quotemain' style='display:none;'>Have a few issues with you. I read your posts and a good deal of some of them is just copy-pasting the other person's post, then having a spoken response. Other notes are switching, albeit rarely, from perspectives, somehow knowing what other players are
thinking, and just a general awkwardness in posting. Despite how negative this sounds, I believe that you're a decent RP'er; you just need a little work. If you ever have questions or just want a proofread of something, let me know and I will gladly help out.
Overall: You're decent, but some more experience and variety will help.
Points:
- 1 level for finishing an RP. This would be three like normal, but your RP itself is oddly split in two. Upon the finish of part two, the remaining 2/3 will be added.
- 1 level for post count. Like the others, it is simply the shortness of the RP that leads to only one point.
- 2 levels for overall skill. I've already pointed out some things, and like I said, you aren't a bad RP'er. Just need some work.
- 2 levels for battling: This would be three, but the grimer battle that you were in was...odd. Sand Attack doesn't 'stop' an enemy attack; it blinds the enemy by shooting sand at them, likely their eyes, and reducing their accuracy. I'll let the Take Down and capture slide, but for future reference, physical attacks are ill-lucked against Grimers and Muk.
- Total: 6/15
Other notes: Nothing much. Keeps striving to improve yourself, and you'll do fine.</div>
Posted by: The Rose Crusader Aug 31 2008, 10:29 AM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=4163 RP Grading
"Four aspiring trainers begin their adventure in the small Port Town of Barley, where everyone knows your business."
The RP has finally come to a close after 127 Posts, 7 pages, 1,225 views and 28 days.
(I decided to personalize the 'short summary' and made one for each individual character and put it underneath their links to their respective profiles.)
The characters that participated in the RP are as follows:
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=4119 - The Rose Crusader
Over the course of the RP, Melinda learned a lot of lessons on how to be a nicer person. She captured a Feebas early on while fishing. Mindy was in two battles: one with Jax Sorben with her Combee and the other was a double battle. Her and Jaima versed Lemonade Johnson, Melinda using her newly captured Taillow. She spent time making poffins for her pokemon, and obtained a Pokegear from her new friend Jaima. Now, she is headed for the Gigarte Arboretum with Jaima to continue her adventure.http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=4138 - RPGBouncer
Jax battled Melinda with his Pikachu and earned some money doing so. He captured a Snubbull, left in his Pokecenter room from previous inhabitants. He spent time with Lemonade Johnson, and then *left due to a family emergency and 'borrowed' most of Lemonade's money for the trip back home.*
**Jax's presence in the RP was hurt when RPGBouncer was absent for a long time. What bothered me was that while he was on his account, he did not post in the RP, hurting Lemonade's roleplaying experience. When questioned about his absence, he told me that he had to go to mental therapy sessions, and that he wasn't in the correct fram of mind to RP. I then gave him another week to post, but he never came back on. So, Jaima daxtertik and I decided to give him an alibi for leaving so abruptly in the middle of the RP. We felt it was the best way to deal with the situation. He has not been on his account since my last PM to him.**
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=3869 - Jaima
Jaima and Melinda became friends as soon as they met each other. They were roomates in the Pokemon Center, and bonded greatly. Jaima captured a Ralts in the middle of the last night in Barley from a paranormal experience. Jaima cares for his pokemon deeply, constantly referring to them as his 'kids'. Jaima battles Lemonade by himself with all of his Pokemon, and loses. He next battles Lemonade again in a double battle with Melinda with his Bulbasaur. His Pokegear got ruined in the double battle, so he had to get it fixed. He questioned if he should even be attempting his adventure, but was reassured by Melinda. Now, he is accompanying her to Gigarte, and learning more and more about himself every day.
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=4118 - Daxtertik
Lemonade began the RP with just another day at the beach. He was consequential in the capturing of Melinda's Feebas. He then made friends with his roommate Jax Sorben. The next day, he battled Jaima and crushed him due to his superior battling skills and stronger pokemon. He spent the rest of that day with jax at the arcade. Afterwards, he learned of what Jax did and was PO'ed. That kid had even stolen his favorite hat! He then battled Melinda and Jaima in a double battle, and won yet againdue to his battling prowess. Later, while cleaning Jax's bed, he found a pokeball, and in it was an Aipom. Lemonade took it with him, and is now travelling south en route to Petropolis.
*It is my request that you do not penalize Lemonade Johnson for points in the activity category. As stated earlier, his RPing experience was hurt gravely due to RPGBouncer's absence. He waited extremely patiently for him to post, but he never did. We were pming each other constantly about the problem, Lemonade kept on asking me if he could post regardless if RPGBouncer posted or not, but it was my decision to keep on giving RPGBouncer extra time. So if anyone should be punished for Lemonade's 'lack of activity', it should be me.*
It has certainly been a wonderful RP experience these past four weeks. I look forward to RPing with all of the participants again.
However, I do have one request. Could the RP please be locked to prevent random people from posting in it? Thank you.
Posted by: Spamm Sep 1 2008, 10:20 PM
I'll take that. I've never graded an RP before, so you might not get results for a few days. I'll close it up now.
Edit: Done. Some terribly short posts riddled the thread, and spelling mistakes were present, though they're not a huge detriment. Everyone makes those. I will say that firefox's built in spell check is your friend. Also, the plot was fairly simple, and really didn't seem to have too much of a single direction. Just a "Hey let's hang out and make friends" type of RP, which is fine for the first one. Keep up the good work, and I'm sure the plots will get more interesting
Mel: 3 levels for finishing the RP, 3 levels for overall skill, 3 levels for battling, 2 for activity. Totals at 11. I liked Mel, and you seemed the most consistent in your post length. I think you could do for a little more description of actual objects in your posting. Instead of the "bed", try the "soft, feathery bed with pink satin sheets". I liked how she reacted around Jaima, but is she really that feminist? You did a good job of running the thread, considering it had no real direction. About what you mentioned on activity: it's usually not a good thing to prevent people from posting unless it'll really throw something off. Stalling an RP on purpose usually makes people upset. Wait a few days, but no more than a week, or your RPers will lose interest. Also, you ARE allowed to swear.
Jaima: 3 for finishing, 3 for skill, 3 for battles, and 2 for activity. Totals at 11. You made spelling mistakes, and your posts were either painfully short or wicked long. I liked the letters Jaima got from the family though. That was nice. And it was funny seeing the different people defined by colours. Also, remember, don't quote posts. Copy/paste certain lines as they pertain to your character, but don't be so redundant. It was nice to see a guy get nervous when meeting a pretty girl.
Lemonade: 3 for finish, 2 for skill, 3 for battle, and 2 for activity. Totals at 10. Your posts were all around the same length, which hurt, because they were all short and devoid of a lot of description you could have added. Spelling mistakes were around as well. I liked Lemonade the character, and his set up with the feebas was a wicked idea. Props to you for that. Just try and be a little more descriptive in your posts.
Jax: 2 for not quite finishing, 3 for skill, 1 for battles, and 2 for activity. Totals at 8. You left. :/ Good posts, but only one battle with your single pokemon hurt you there. I liked Jax and his attitude, and his showmanship. You get pretty much the same comments as everyone else: spelling mistakes and descriptive writing.
Posted by: Jack Siedel Oct 17 2008, 08:08 AM
The Roleplay http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=4435&st=0 has just recieved it's closing post, and is now finished.
The players that were included in it are:
(myself) playing my character Jack Siedel
daxterik as Lemonade Johnson
Handsome as Charlie
and (however briefly)
flameknight as Jonathon
The basic synopsis of the RP is that the first trio meet while crossing paths on the way to Petropolis, and after introductions a two-on-two battle ensues. There is a trade after the battle, and then the trainers go on their varying ways.
Posted by: Earl Oct 24 2008, 04:25 PM
Part Two of the Harrington Cup, quite a http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=4194&st=0&start=0 for all.
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=3889- http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showuser=2282
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=3871- http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showuser=2272
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=3960- http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showuser=1348
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=3985- http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showuser=2413
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=4246&st=0&p=45233&#entry45233- http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showuser=77
In this unfortunately fated RP, the Cup gets underway and promptly taken over by a mysterious organization, a member of whom steals Matt's beloved Combee.
Etnie also participated in this, but dropped out after one post.
Posted by: Aremis Oct 29 2008, 08:54 AM
Guess http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=4111 is finished seeming how its not been used for a couple of months.
People involved:
Aremis - Willis
Wooper - Eldred
Shoutai - Shoutai
Summary:
Three trainers meet briefly under the neon lights of Petropolis. While the fate of Eldred and Shoutai is unknown, Willis leaves Petropolis with a new companion, Torch, and feeling bewildered at how people can live in a place full of corruption.
Posted by: Earl Nov 2 2008, 10:35 PM
Well, guys, I haven't been crowned yet, but I'm takin' over as PANE head. So...I'ma grade this, then take a nap.
The Road to Petropolis
Not a bad RP, by any means. Uhm...I'm sorta bad at this, so I'll keep it to general advice. Try to describe your surroundings more. As opposed to,
"Before them was a trainer, his four pokemon in tow, playing about as they headed down along the road that came from Barley."
one might instead say,
"Before them was a young man clad in clashing yellow and green, 4 Pokemon merrily playing behind him on the well trodden road."
Eh, I dunno, everyone else gave advice. Me, not so much. Anyway, enough tl;dr.
Jack Seidel
3 for participating, 2 for activity, 3 for fighting, and 4 for skill. You did a pretty good job of running the RP, so your skill gets a +1 bump. 12/15
Lemonade Johnson
3 for participating, 2 for activity, 3 for fighting, and 3 for skill. The heck is with your Aipom? Is it a Shadow Pokemon or something? Sorry, but Furoh has no Shadow Pokemon. Not yet, anyways. 11/15
Charlie
3 for participating, 2 for activity, 3 for fighting, and 3 for skill. I like Charlie, and you play her pretty well. Just take a quick look through your posts for grammar and spelling mistakes. 11/15
Jonathon
1 for participating. I'm sorry, but 1 short post with many grammar mistakes does not an RP make. 1/15.
I'll get to Creek later.
Posted by: Spamm Nov 3 2008, 06:02 PM
Sorry I didn't get to "The Big Day" sooner. I've got it done now.
Earl: +10 levels.
Everyone else: +5
Really not much I can say. This was a really short RP. If you want me to go into details as to why you think you should have gotten more, PM me.
Posted by: Monk Nov 21 2008, 03:59 PM
Up a Creek
Lol without a paddle, amirite? Usually, the thread runner sends in the grading request, but since he hasn't been on since September, it's reasonable.
Eldred
7/15. Eldred was excellently played, but the shortness of the RP dinged you out of an 11.
Willis
6/15 Our most often poster. In this RP, we write in the past tense and double space in between conversation. I.E:
"Hey," yelled Jimmy.
"Hey, yourself," cooed Shelly back.
Not
"Hey," yelled Jimmy.
"Hey, yourself," cooed Shelly back.
Shoutai
3/15. Your quality of posting went down as the RP wound down.
And that's that bro.
Posted by: The Sexy DJSanders Nov 27 2008, 08:01 AM
At A Crossroads
Well its relly short but we are both going to a diffrent rp so here it is.
People-
Aremis - Willis
The Sexy DJsanders - David
Flameknight - Jonathian i think
Summery Three trainers meet at a cross of roads have a couple of battles then two take off in the same direction.
Posted by: Monk Nov 27 2008, 10:20 PM
At A Crossroads
Short.
Aremis- Willis (click to showhide)
5/15 levels. You were the best poster, but everything is relative, unfortunately. More depth in posts, more description, a better clip of posting- all are things you need. Never be afraid to check out completed RPs.
David- DjSanders (click to showhide)
2/15 You god-modded. A lot. Like, here.
QUOTE(flameknight @ Oct 5 2008, 06:05 PM)
Then he drifted to sleep.
He just fell asleep, it's not hard to see. But then:
QUOTE(The Sexy DJSanders @ Oct 5 2008, 07:47 PM)
David was walking down the dusty road when he saw a trainer with a gulpin useing sludge bomb. Eh, he looks pretty tough ill challange him "Hey you" David said. The trainer flinched and turned.
Uhm, dude. He fell asleep. Have you ever flinched while you're asleep? It's not an easy mistake to make.
And, if you're confused and need to make an out of character remark, you start a discussion thread in the PANE Discussion forum. Also- spell check is your friend.
Jonathon- flameknight (click to showhide)
2/15
You didn't apparently check your posts over at all. Also-
QUOTE(flameknight @ Oct 5 2008, 09:52 PM)
"A charmander hm"JP smirked."Let's go Medichar!"Medichar came out of his poke ball.OH NO STUPID PARENT PROGAM SHUTTING DOWN COMPUTER!!!!!!!!!!!
is unacceptable. If you can't finish a post, you don't post. Even if you do- which is bad enough- you edit your post to make sense. You don't just leave it like that.
Posted by: Living Arrow Dec 21 2008, 05:14 AM
So, my RP has *finally* come to a close and needs reviewing by mods Here are the vital stats:
Gigarte Park RP Grading
The RP has come to a close after 168 Posts (give or take a couple of OOC posts), 9 pages, 1,928 views and a little over 5 months.
The characters that participated in the RP are as follows:
Darryn Kellor -
Living ArrowAfter making a slow start with his team of unhealthy Pokemon and capturing and Eevee, Darryn met with visitors to the city - Melinda and Jaima. They made friends quickly and Darryn helped them out with a spa treatment, focusing on improving the Beauty of Mindy's Feebas. A rival by the name of Tyron Jildare was introduced. He did not have a gym battle but the following are his Pokemon's experiences:
Caterpie and Pidgey took part in special training exercises.
Pidgey battled Eevee so that Darryn could capture him.
Pidgey battled Jaima's Bulbasaur under the command of Mindy and lost.
Eevee battled Jaima's Ralts and won.
Caterpie battled Jaima's Cyndaquil and lost.
Pidgey battled Tyron's Chikorita and was called back but returned to the battle later to defeat Tyron's Koffing.
Caterpie battled Tyron's Chikorita and evolved into Metapod to win the match. She later fell to Tyron's Koffing.
Melinda Rose -
The Rose CrusaderWhen entering Gigarte, Melinda made a beeline (pardon the character pun) for Darryn but her intentions were quashed when he let her know he was gay. She clicked with him quickly and, as new friends, they helped each other learn about their Pokemon and each other. She challenged the gym leader of Gigarte (Chloe) and won the Stonebloom Badge. She then was forced to send her Vespiquen back home to Floaroma Town and continue her journey without her oldest friend. Her Pokemons' achievements are as follows:
Feebas underwent some Beauty treatment including a scale exfoliant wash with dry berries in the mixture.
Combee was used the the Gigarte Gym match against Chloe's Cherubi. She evolved when the battle got tough and won the battle as a powerful Vespiquen.
Vespiquen, nicknamed "Queen" was sent back to Floaroma Town and may now be called upon at any time to return to Mindy's team for short periods of time.
Jaima Kuonji -
JaimaAlthough things started slowly between Darryn and Jaima, Jaima accepted Darryn into the team after initially feeling jealous that he was getting special attention from Melinda. He strove to improve the functionings of his team and showed everyone the importance of having empathy with your Pokemon. It has been noted that his Cyndaquil is loathe of battling and his Riolu is very protective of the young Ralts that is in their team. After a long and surprisingly hard battle, Jaima captured a Budew and sent it back to his mother in New Bark Town. He went on to challenge Chloe at the Gigarte Gym and win the Stonebloom Badge. Here are his Pokemons' acheivements:
Grondir, Fang, Shadow and Mercury failed to defeat a wild Budew but were saved by the timely arrival of Mr. Postman (how did he get undergorund?!).
Grondir, under Mindy's direction, battled and defeated Darryn's Pidgey.
Mercury was defeated by Darryn's Eevee.
Ember defeated Darryn's Caterpie.
Grondir, still with Mindy, defeated Chloe's Bonsly but lost to her Cherubi.
Shadow and Mercury were paired in a double match against Chloe and defeated both her Cacturne and Graveler with neither of them fainting.
At the close of the RP, all three are headed towards Lenoilia.
OOC (click to showhide)
I think I got everything
If not I'' edit later.
Posted by: Monk Dec 21 2008, 08:40 PM
AT A CROSSROADS
Melinda Rose- TRC (click to showhide)
14/15
Jaima Kuonji- Jaima (click to showhide)
14/15
Darryn Keller- Living Arrow (click to showhide)
14/15
Darryn: Watch out about sentence fragments:
They were rough. Some hanging off while others fell off of their own accord.
Should be: They were rough, some hanging off while others fell off of their own accord.
AHHH WHO CARES I'M NOT GIVING CRITICISM I'M JUST BEING A TIGHTASS
Posted by: The Dark Knight Mar 2 2009, 09:20 AM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=5156 has been completed.
In this unfortunately fated RP, a group of trainers hope to get a new start in Furoh by taking a luxury cruise liner called the SS ANNE. Unluckily, Team Rocket intervenes with the ship's activities and havoc ensues. The sheer chaos inflicted by Team Rocket eventually causes the ship to sink, leaving our trainers to escape the sinking ship by themselves.
- http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=5022 - Ledah
- http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=5163 - The Dark Knight
- http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=4977 - Shadow Dragon
- http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=4980 - Yoshikin
- http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=5119 - Devolocy
- http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=5351 - Milo
- http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=5357 - The Serenity Spirit
Posted by: Michael Weston Mar 9 2009, 09:29 PM
FOLLOWING A MAIDEN VOYAGE
Not bad. WHAT IS WITH THE DREAM. YOU CAN'T ALL HAVE THE SAME DREAM. IT'S RIDICULOUS. Also you guys controlled characters that were not yours. If anyone wants more specific reasons for their grading, pm moi.
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=5022 - Ledah
Spoiler (click to showhide)
Not graded. You did an ok job of sorta leading the RP,till you left.
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=5163 - The Dark Knight
Spoiler (click to showhide)
10/15
Doing great so far. Just maybe include more in your posts, add some more description, have Travis do more.
So when are we rpin'?
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=4977 - Shadow Dragon
Spoiler (click to showhide)
7/15
Not bad, not great. Some terribly short posts. You don't have to post after every other one. Give Em a little more to react to. And you're not clairvoyant.
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=4980 - Yoshikin
Spoiler (click to showhide)
7/15
Same as Em. Almost exactly. How come everyone has the same exact dream? This is not a Fire Emblem RP or whatever.
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=5119 - Devolocy
Spoiler (click to showhide)
2/15
You only posted thrice. I can't give many levels for that. If you posted more, your grade would reflect that.
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=5351 - Milo
Spoiler (click to showhide)
6/15
Dreams. Also you controlled other people's characters too much.
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=5357 - The Serenity Spirit
Spoiler (click to showhide)
8/15.
Dreams. You controlled other's characters a bit too, but you had a general better quality of posts.
Posted by: Hungry Hungry Houndoom Apr 26 2009, 01:32 PM
The post "Lenoilia Ruins" is now finished.
In Lenoilia Ruins, Jaima Kuonji, Melinda Rose, and Darryn Kellor decide to head to Arasam to gain their next badge. The closest stop on that road is Lenoilia. Though Melinda's fears argue against it, the group decides they must camp for the night before they reach the town. As they camp, they discover they're out of food. Then they're attacked.
After the attack is staved off, they meet a new friend, who provides them with food, comfort, and a new perspective.
And that's just the beginning.
Melinda Rose (click to showhide)
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=4119 trip started out horribly. She is terrified of being outside in the dark, yet stay outside they must. Her two companions convince her that they'll be safe, and yet they're attacked in the night! Despite a rough start, she gains two pokémon friends, a midreavus (who's family helped against her party's attackers) and a roselia, who is somewhat of a kindred spirit. She has also struck a close friendship with their new friend, Darck Firebird
Darryn Kellor (click to showhide)
http://forums.gtsplus.net/indwx.php?showtopic=4110 Learned a lot on this trip, including, but not limited to the importance of making sure your pokémon are emotionally stable before you take them out, lest they try to kill your friends. His trip was filled with ups and downs and challenged him with behavioral issues, the difference between learned knowledge vs. applied knowledge, and how empathy relates to raising and providing health for pokémon. Darryn acquired a sassy, slightly off kilter vulpix who he has named Lady, who quickly went from being out to eliminate her competition to being the literal advocate for the rest of the team. Said rest of team evolved in order to protect Darryn, the first step in bringing him a new understanding.
Darck Firebird (click to showhide)
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=4018 joined the team after it had already gone the night without food, and been attacked by a rampaging group of ghost-types, psychics, and a vulpix. He provided them with food and company, and though he disagreed with their goals, he stayed with them after accomplishig his own: The capture of an Absol. He has been the object of two people's desire and become a good friend and companion.
((OOC NOTE: The story prevented Darck from joining from the beginning, and Real Life prevented him from participating to the end. He has given The Rose Crusader permission to bunny his character for the duration of his absence from this plot))
Jaima Kuonji (click to showhide)
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=3869 trip has been filled with some small victories, between two massive valleys. He forgot the food (if you ask him, he should have remembered), he assured both Mindy and Mercury that they'd be safe (and then they got attacked), and he allowed the theft of his beloved first pokémon. In between, he saved the life of a mudkip who'd been in toxic muck for three days, and befriended (possibly more) a teenage Nurse Joy. Good and bad luck are in the eye of the beholder, but even the most optimistic eye might cringe at Lenoilia.
At the end of the RP, Mindy, Darryn, and Darck headed to Arasam,and Jaima stayed behind to recover his pokémon.
Posted by: Michael Weston Apr 29 2009, 08:24 PM
Mmkay, I'll go into detail later, but basically...
LENOLIA RUINSJaima, Darryn, Mindy- 15/15. No complaints.
Darck-7/15. Your not being in half the RP heavily penalized you. Sorry dawg.
Posted by: Christopher Wallken May 21 2009, 11:45 PM
Side Note (click to showhide)
It was mutually agreed by the three active rper's, Rezerai, Knil1, and I, To submit this due to inactivity of the thread owner. (Inactive for nearly a week, no new posts from him for two.)
Jackal and Lobomon pretty much left during the week long lag of springbreak.
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=5817
Characters (listed in order of appearance)
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=5526&st=0&p=85707&#entry85707 - Blue Giratina
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=5721 - Christopher Wallken
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=5737&st=0&p=90521&#entry90521 - Rezerai
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?act=findpost&pid=88582 - Lobomon (Inactive)
John Madigan - Laughing Jackal (Inactive)
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=5447 - Knil1
Posted by: Colonel Crazy May 25 2009, 04:24 PM
Prospecting --->
I can't say that I enjoyed reading this. The pace was rushed, some liberties were taken (mainly by BG) that shouldn't have happened. This isn't really the fault of all the RPers, though; Blue Giratina was pushing events too fast.
Norman Senna- 8/15. You rushed the events forward way too much. People barely had enough time to talk to each other before you skipped ahead. You bunnied people a bit, and attacked another person's Pokemon, in what seemed like an unplanned event. You could have at least tried to plan it out a bit more. Also didn't post near the end.
Jon Poole- 13/15. You managed to RP through this, despite scenes being changed way too fast. I would have freaked out in the same condition. You should watch for grammar, and be careful of some word usage. Examples being using it's (which actually means it is) for possession and using then instead of than. (more then would actually be more than, then is more used for something regarding time.)
Kuri Tali- 13/15. Same goes for you with Looker. Slight grammar issues, but you did well.
Suzanna Elciro- 2/15. Left early, not much to say on that. However, the talking Riolu is a problem. Can't have that.
John Madigan- 3/15. I liked your unique post form, but you gave that up. Left early, too.
Koryu- 11/15. Joined a little late. Also, catching a Seel and a Clefairy was a bit much. Doc can't remember if you PM'd him about it, but in the meantime choose ONE of those Pokemon to keep.
EDIT: I graded this even though not all of the members posted in Current Levels, only because they were inactive. If you were one of the inactive people, you cannot use those levels until you post in the thread.
Posted by: Umbrae Calamitas Jun 3 2009, 01:19 AM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=8634&st=0&start=0 is complete.
Participants:
Hungry Hungry Houndoom:http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=3869
Umbrae Calamitas: http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=6401
Start Date: 29th April 2009
End Date: 3rd June 2009
Length: 63 posts
Summary: After leaving Petropolis with the rescued Cyndaquil as her new companion, Tuesday hitches a ride on the back of a farmer's wagon and makes her way down the road toward Lenoilia City, where she hopes to find the pokemon's trainer. Along the way, she continues to send letters back and forth to her new penpal, Jaima, using his family's mail-pokemon, Mr. Postman the Swellow.
It's when Tuesday is attacked by a Bayleef, and promptly rescued by the Cyndaquil, that she meets up with Jaima. When one crisis ends with his and Ember's reunion, another begins with the arrival of Celebi, a faerie-like pokemon who can travel through time. After they agree to help her retrieve the OmniGlass - a crystal that controls time but was stolen by a thief - they are transported to the Old World, a time well-known as the Medieval Era, complete with fire-breathing dragon.
It is here, trying to rescue a town from the rage of a rampaging Charizard, that they get their first glimpse of the Time Thief. When they thwart him in this era, allowing the Charizard to return to her nest and stopping his attempt to keep the rest of the world from knowing how to train pokemon, he uses the OmniGlass to travel to Ancient Rome, where he takes the position as advisor to the emperor. Tuesday and Jaima are forced into slavery, but manage to wit and fight their way out of danger, uncovering the thief.
The next place they find themselves at is Littleroot, during the time of the witch trials. Their adventure here is short and rather comedic, reminiscent of something Monty Arbok might have done. Their humiliation of the thief, however, by turning his own attempts back upon him, causes him to attempt to erase Jaima from Time itself.
And he succeeds, until Tuesday follows him into the past and rights the wrong. When he cannot stop both by defeating one, the thief attempts to take them both out in the present, sending a stampede of Tauros and Miltank. When Dialga, the guardian of time, witnesses the possible outcomes of their deaths, he, against better judgment, splits time (and the Omniglass) in two, so that there are two parallel universes; one in which Tuesday died and Jaima survived, and one where Jaima died and Tuesday succeeded him. They both undergo trials while trying to save the other, losing pokemon along the way through blindness and happenstance. When all seems lost, however, a wish activates the power of each half of the Omniglass, transporting them back to the time of the thief's childhood.
It is here that it all began, and here that it all must end. Tuesday and Jaima use the knowledge of their own experiences to talk to the younger version of the thief, Lionel, and a group of boys who laughed at his pain. Their interference in this moment altered everything else, righting Time itself, and permitted them to return to the present.
Celebi returns one last time to help them recall the entirety of their adventure, as well as to ensure the safety of the shiny Ponyta within Tuesday's care, before returning them to the present, just outside of Lenoilia City. Here, they get a glimpse of Lionel as he should have been, happy and surrounded by friends. They realize, in this moment, they they have returned what was lost: Time, as well as Hope.
Posted by: Living Arrow Jun 6 2009, 04:12 AM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=8702&st=0 is complete.
Participants:
Living Arrow: http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=4110
Darck: http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=4018
The Rose Crusader: Melinda Rose (profile location unknown)
Start Date: 30th April 2009
End Date: 6th June 2009
Length: 28 posts
Summary: Leaving Lenoilia behind them, these three travellers found themselves at a Pokemon Breeding ranch, begging for food (again). After doing some chores, inlcuding milking the Miltank, the trainers are rewarded with food and then challenged to a double battle by the ranch owner - Mr Loch.
Darryn's Butterfree and Mindy's Roselia fought against Darck's Totodile and Mr Loch's Rapidash resulting in a tie. TO thank them for awakening his battling spirit after so many years, Mr Loch kindly donated eggs to the group. Rather than take an egg, Darryn selected an unwanted Ponyta and vowed to make her flames as large and bright as they should be so that she would not be left behind her siblings.
Mindy then got news that her Vespiquen had fallen very sick back in Floaroma town. She said her goodbyes, leaving a parting gift with Darryn in the form of her psychic abilities, and flew away on her Swellow (not before Darryn gave her his Butterfree to take with her partly for health reasons and partly to support Mindy while Vespiquen is sick).
As the boys travelled on, Darryn slipped away and decided to travel on his own rather than be around Darck any longer as their relationship seemed forced without Mindy to bind them together.
Notes: This RP was brought to a sudden end for a couple of reasons. 1. TRC left the site and so had to be written out of the RP. 2. Darck's had some major irl stuff going on so his time on the site has been drastically decreased over the past few weeks.
Posted by: Colonel Crazy Jun 7 2009, 07:38 PM
Due to the benefit of CAPTAIN ANONYMOUS, Lost was graded early. From what I know, the grading was fair.
This was a bit of a wacko RP to read. All the Pokémon getting five ranks of Lore(English Language) made my mind boggle for a while. I think you've taken a fair deal of Pokémon Canon Defying Acts around here, but alright.
I *adored* Celebi.
Umbrae 10/15 - The references to books throughout were interesting. I regret to report I only caught half of them.
HHH 10/15 - I don't think I can say a lot here. Nice work, interesting reads.
However, I will have to say that this RP isn't canon. IT DIDN'T HAPPEN. Going back in time, and teaching your pokemon how to speak English? Regardless of movie canon, not happening.
Posted by: Bill Nye Jun 21 2009, 04:53 PM
Arasam Adventures:
Sorta short, especially compared to some of the others. Sadly, TRC left, and the ending seemed a bit rushed.
Darryn (click to showhide)
11/15
As always, you did well, but the shortness of the RP docked you the full 15.
Darck (click to showhide)
10/15
Did as well as LA, but you had a some grammar mistakes.
Melinda. (click to showhide)
10/15.
I refuse to believe you've left for good. Explanation, as same as Darryn, minus one because you left early.
Posted by: knil1 Jun 22 2009, 01:11 AM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=10745&st=0&start=0' was closed.
Summary: After finding his way out of the forest of Fidona, Jonathan Poole runs into his older brother, Timothy, at the port. Soon after Koryu Hiroki and Kuri Talli join Jonathan. After finding out that a ticket he needed was lost, Jon was invited onto a larger boat with his brother. The group eventually got on the luxurious yacht and watched as the pokemon played. Shortly after, though, the yacht stopped and smoke was present. While the boat was being fixed, Timothy thought it would be a good opportunity for some battles. Everyone heads to the upper deck and the battles commence.
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=5721 - Looker
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=5737 - Rezerai
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=5447 - knil1
Started: May 22
Ended: June 22
Posts: 30
Posted by: Living Arrow Jul 2 2009, 03:18 PM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=12307&st=0 is complete.
Participants:
Living Arrow: http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=4110
Hungry Hungry Houndoom: http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=3869
Umbrae Calamitas: http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=6401
Start Date: 8th June 2009
End Date: 2nd July 2009
Length: 55 posts
Summary: Travelling on his own, Darryn falls foul of Team Deception. He falls into a mine while his Vulpix, Lady Foxtrot got stolen and put in a cage. Lady somehow managed to contact Mercury, Jaima's Kirlia, via telepathy and call for help.
Jaima and his new friend Tuesday rsuh towards Mount Carello to help Darryn. Along the way they also are confronted by Team Deception who steal thei Riolu and Ponyta respectively. Darryn befriends a wild Cranidos in the cave and foils Deception's plan to wake and capture the local fossil Pokemon. Jaima and Tuesday find Darryn then the trio square off against Team Deception in a battle royale. The trio lose to the power of Boss Deception's evolved squad and are only saved by the timely arrival of Jaima's childhood sweetheart: Meiko.
After healing their Pokemon with what medicine and local flora was available, the trainers confront Team Deception once more in a more organised bout of battling.
In the battle against so-called Shadow-Pokemon, near on all of Jaima's Pokemon evolved to fight at their best and swung the match in their favour. With TD defeated, Officer Jenny arrives and attempts to round them up but the Boss and his Vice Captain escape. The trainers finally reach Arasam.
Posted by: Nezzie Jul 3 2009, 12:05 AM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=13463&pid=329720&st=60&#entry329720 is complete.
Participants:
ROMANA: http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=13416
Lindley: http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=13417
CubeB: http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=12964
Nezzie: http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=13501
Ayra Calaenlen: http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=13799&st=0&p=307725&#entry307725
Start Date: June 21 2009
End Date: July 2 2009
Length: 65 posts (4 pages)
Summary: Connie and Verity, childhood friends raised on the Butterfree Farm near Barley, make their way to the town to begin their Pokémon adventure. Along the way, Connie (literally) ran into an Oddish, which she fought and successfully captured with the help of her Torchic.
Meanwhile, on a ferry traveling from the various regions of the Pokémon world to Furoh, Spencer, a breeder from Orre. was getting ready to disembark when he (literally) ran into someone. That someone was Waker, a mute boy from the Johto region. After sharing their stories - Waker wished to be a master Coordinator, Spencer wanted to fight in the Pokémon league - the two became fast friends. They disembarked the ferry together and went on their way to the Pokémon Centre.
Connie and Verity had made their way into town by this point, and were challenged to a battle by two very rude schoolchildren. The battle went badly for Connie and Spencer intervened, scaring off the two with his Charmander. After some introductions, the group went into the Centre and got their rooms for the night.
After hearing the news that their farm's milk was no longer used in town, the girls seemed upset. They cheered, however, as Waker described Pokémon contests to the group - they decided together to accompany him the next day at the Practice Hall. They were then interrupted by a man named Uta Refson, who promptly ignored the girls and took a keen interest in the boys' Pokémon. Spencer's Charmander and Waker's Nidoran♂ disliked the man and Waker's Pokémon attempted to attack him. Waker restrained him, but was mildly poisoned.
While being treated by the Centre's Happiny and Verity, a mute man named Ciro entered the Centre, having trouble communicating with his Pokémon. Spencer's Treecko immediately fell for Ciro's Treecko, didn't seem too interested in him.
Verity and her Machop then went outside and witnessed a truck full of enraged Miltanks. Confused, she and Connie left the boys and headed off to bed.
Spencer and Waker stayed long enough to hear a disturbing news bulletin about a shadow Pokémon attack at Mt Carello. Unsettled and reminded of his past, Spencer went to bed thinking of ways to fight off any Shadow Pokémon he'd encounter. Waker soon followed the rest, dreaming of his parents back in Johto.
Ciro, highly confused by the others, decided to avoid the group for the night and fell asleep in the Centre's front lobby.
Notes: ...Wow, that was a long summary. This was more of a let's-get-to-know-each-other thing than anything - there was only one battle. We're building a plot for our next RP that revolves around the NPC Uta and the mysterious Practice Contest Hall in Barley. Ayra came in with Ciro a little late in the RP and we moved forward without them - I've already contacted them to let them know that the thread is closing soon. Thankfully, they managed to post in time. .)
I am aware that it moved a little fast - pacing issues are a problem for me. I'll work on it so the next RP goes a little more smoothly for everyone else.
Posted by: TR Darci Niguel Jul 5 2009, 05:37 PM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=13979&pid=336910&st=40&#entry336910 is finished.
Participants:
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=13860 - TR Darci Niguel
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=12389 - Pancackes
Started: June 27th
Ended: July. 5
Posts: 36 (41 including OC posts)
Summary: Darci is leaving for her adventure and says good-bye to her 'dad'. She starts traveling to Arasam, running across
The countryside. Along the route, she spots and plusle and chases after it, trying to capture it. After a while, she loses track of the plusle and finds out she is lost. Unknown to her, she has
passed the route to Arasam and is almost to the crossroads. She is cleaning herself up after chasing the Plusle when she is frightened and runs up the route towards Barley where she rests and meets Lilly.
Lilly and Darci introduce themselves and their pokemon. After a while, Darci mentions a battle. The mention of a battles STARTS a battle between Lilly's plusle and Minun and Darci's Hoothoot (Victor), Turtwig (Maxwell), and Torchic (Kaito). The battles rages on until, finally, it is match point and every move counts, the last showdown between Lilly's Plusle and Darci's Hoothoot (Victor) and Torchic (Kaito)
Notes: Had to be stopped early since Pancakes had to take a break 'til the 21st and it was questionable whether or not i could remain active until then.
Posted by: Living Arrow Jul 7 2009, 02:18 PM
OK. Here we go. My first Grading as a Mod!
Settig Out to Barley
General Comments: I love all of you initial posts. Each one of you managed to get across individual character traits nicely and nothing was too generic to make me feel bored . I do, however, feel that the post was somewhat hijacked early on in its lifetime for a short period… CubeB and Nezzie – you guys really took over! I don’t know how much all of you communicated with each other but evening the odds makes for easier reading :p Anywho, this RP made me crave ice cream so I had to go get some :p A tad surprised to find not one but TWO mute people in a single RP!
Very sparse battling so none of you scored well on that front
Truth is, I’ve been waiting for a bunch like you guys to come out of the woodwork and it has been worth it! I loved this RP and all of the participants!
ROMANA - Connie (click to showhide)
Very cute first battle against the Oddish. Bless Connie! She’s so sweet for thinking about the Oddish’s possible family!
Participation - 3
Skill - 5
Activity - 2
Battling - 1
Total: 11
Lindley - Verity (click to showhide)
Such a little know-it-all! Someone has been doing their studying! Loved the flashback about being an amazon!
Participation - 3
Skill - 5
Activity - 2
Battling - 1
Total: 11
CubeB - Spencer (click to showhide)
Omg those three Pokemon are a smart little bunch – I loved their interactions. Hehe, a little protective badass in the making! One little note, some of your shorter posts were probably so short because you needed more to stimulate a longer post, right? I’d suggest waiting for someone else to post if you are unsure what to write. I loved the new bulletin from Carello – INSPIRED!
Participation - 3
Skill - 5
Activity - 2
Battling - 0
Total: 10
Nezzie - Waker (click to showhide)
Although dumb, he has awesome conversation skills! I see Darryn has *some* competition around here… :p I’ll get the Contest format formalised for you to read over shortly.
Participation - 3
Skill - 5
Activity - 2
Battling - 0
Total: 10
Ayra - Ciro (click to showhide)
You came in a little late but I enjoyed your posts. Since they were so few, however, I couldn’t really give you the same points as the others.
Participation - 3
Skill - 3 (I didn't have much to go on so I'll be looking out for your skill points next time!)
Activity - 0
Battling - 0
Total: 6
Posted by: Living Arrow Jul 13 2009, 04:29 PM
The Countryside
General Comments: As you all know, the RP was brought to an ubrupt end. This has unfortunately resulted in a lower grading than was otherwise deserved. Also, the story was pretty much: "Hi, let's battle" and with something so basic it would be unfair for me to give you full marks in certain sections (I'd like to see more originality next time). Even so, here are the results:
Darci Y. Niguel - Darci (click to showhide)
Started out with some humour - nice touch! I love Victor - he's a keeper
Good, imaginative battling and fair post length. A nice read.
Participation - 3
Skill - 3
Activity - 1
Battling - 3
Total: 10
Pancakes - Lilly (click to showhide)
Your posts were all really short. In some places it was a real shame to see you hadn't posted more as Darci had set up some pretty decent conversations for you to respond to.
Participation - 3
Skill - 1
Activity - 1
Battling - 1
Total: 6
Posted by: Living Arrow Jul 13 2009, 04:48 PM
Troubles of Travel
General Comments: Nicely started but the RP seemed to slow down in the middle while they boarded the ship to the mainland. Even so, you all wrote that well and it was good to see the trainers get to know each other before becoming the best of friends in a second. There is no H in Mawile!!! Again, this RP was cut short and I'm sad to see that happen when the battles finally started. Here are the results:
Looker - Jon (click to showhide)
Nice references to Sinnoh and Eterna Forest's Mansion
You set the scene nicely for this RP. Watch out for your grammar and spelling in places - there were a few shockers in there! .
Participation - 3
Skill - 3
Activity - 1
Battling - 1
Total: 8
Rezerai - Kuri (click to showhide)
Smooth writing - linking posts very nicely - well done! Unfortunately you got no battle points but your writing was the best of the three.
Participation - 3
Skill - 4
Activity - 1
Battling - 0
Total: 8
Knil - Koryu (click to showhide)
Kakyouku, Koryu?!?! They sound so similar! :P And his Pidgey is somewhat like Ash'a Gligar before it evolved - I love dopey Pokemon! Your battle grade was higher as it was written well despite being so short.
Participation - 3
Skill - 3
Activity - 1
Battling - 2
Total: 9
Posted by: Bill Nye Jul 16 2009, 03:04 AM
CLIMBING MOUNT CARELLO.
This was a horrible RP and I'm disappointed in all of you. >:O You guys, without much of a doubt, have the ~longest~ posts in PANE, full of detail and pertinent dialogue. In this one, it seemed that everything was relevant, not a single line of dialogue went to waste. Apparently, I can't spell dialogue.
JAIMA KUONJI.
-8 levels, get out of PANE.
TUESDAY BERDISON.
See Jaima.
DARRYN KELLOR.
+20. A man's man. Darryn's plight
**15's all around, will edit later.
Posted by: Duck Tape Jul 16 2009, 06:32 PM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=12904&st=0 is complete.
The RPers involved are:
Fei Fei - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=12400
Charlie Piers - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=12877
DuckTape - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=12726
Three girls set out from home, each one anticipating the respective journeys ahead of them. Their meeting, however, throws this all into chaos as they're thrust into harrowing encounters with mankeys, road signs to nowhere, and crazy old men.
Lost and Yet to be Found is intended as a 'trial' RP, getting used to the site and our characters while gaining experience, etc. Fei, Charlie, and I plan to do more of the same story line, separated into longer parts or episodes, or however you will, in the future.
Thank you for the grading.
Posted by: 2gamers Jul 19 2009, 04:07 PM
"http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=10548&st=0" is finally finished!
Starring:
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=10059- Phoenix Sapphire
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=10334- 2gamers
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=9630- Gespenst
In FFFFFF, Pan arrives in Fidona in document wildlife of the islands forests and investigate the rumor a giant tree. Aided by Sapphire, a local trainer who hadn't even explored her own country, Pan finds a slew of pokemon, including her newest friend Chi-Chi the pachirisu. A series of unfortunate events allowed Pan and co. to unlock the mystery of the Wooden Skyscraper.
Notes:
On Gespenst's disappearance: I did not see his edited post in the discussion thread until recently. I feel kind of bad about that. I'll make a point on PM communication next time.
On Phoenix Sapphire: She had school, so she could only post on weekends. Her last post was June 19 and she hasn't answered my PM, so I assume it's real life stuff going on.
Neither member has been online since June and I'm not sure they have current level posts.
On my final post: I really wanted to have a satisfying ending to the RP, but also wanted to move on. So I just wrote up the second half of my RP plans. I just typed my characters' actions as I don't have permission to bunny.
Overall, not the best of starts, but I think I've learned a few lessons.
Posted by: Living Arrow Jul 20 2009, 02:15 PM
Lost and Yet to be Found
General Comments: I love how you three seamlessly started conversing together in a way that was really good to read. It wasn’t your bog-standard “I’m ME! And I’m gonna be a Pokemon MASTER!” which was always good to see.
Great introduction, great battle, great reprieve, great “we’re lost?!” plot, and finally a link to one of the game’s best loved NPCs – the Trickster. This was an excellent RP and only excellent gradings will do!
Dynh - Duck Tape (click to showhide)
I absolutely loved your opening – a great start! Dynh sounds just like me! :P Very funny stuff, but take care to use proper paragraphing when writing dialogue. Dynh’s a big old lesbian!? Who knew! And how did she get lost so quickly?! Insane! You might want to check KQ’s level – it should probably be 5… Anywho, I didn’t stop laughing with this girl – she was awesome! Can you say “Mime Jr.”?
Mercedes - Charlie Piers (click to showhide)
Such a sweet little girl! A nice career-driven soul fits well into any RP Don’t forget little Kepri has a BIG type advantage against Mankey, too!... *checks* Since when did female Nidoran learn Peck? That’ll be the males. I skimmed over that detail anyway – the battle was good. She turned out to be a tough little cookie – I was pretty surprised! Can you say “Happiny”?
Alexis - Fei Fei (click to showhide)
“Hobo, much?” LMAO! I think I can be confident in saying she is the most able battler of the group and the most sarcastic to boot! Sasseh! Your new Mawile has some zest in her and I liked her capture battle. Can you say “Magby”?
All of you! (click to showhide)
Participation - 3
Skill - 5
Activity - 2
Battling - 5
Total: 15/15
Posted by: Living Arrow Jul 20 2009, 03:42 PM
The Fabulously Finicky Forests of the Fortunate Families of Fidona.
General Comments: Nicely written by all participants. Unfortunately, Gespenst became inactive early on and so it drew out the RP… Even so, the other RPlayers managed to put forward a decent RP with nice dialogue and comfortable conversation between their characters.
Pan - 2gamers (click to showhide)
Cool opening – nice use of the quote feature to mark out a letter. You were committed and wrote well, so you got a better score than the others.
Participation - 3
Skill - 4
Activity - 2
Battling - 5
Total: 14
Saph - Sapphire Phoenix (click to showhide)
All Pokemon have got to train – opening your first RP that way was a nice touch! Bad Alexis! BAAAAD! You left the RP early so it damaged your score a little (no fault of your own, but that’s just the way it goes).
Participation - 3
Skill - 3
Activity - 1
Battling - 2
Total: 9
Thomas - Gespenst (click to showhide)
Haha! Bit of a hopeless soul, isn’t he? Take care when you are RPing. When you sign up, check if you can post as often as the other participants so it all runs a bit more smoothly.
Participation - 3
Skill - 1
Activity - 0
Battling - 0
Total: 4
Posted by: Pumpkin King Jul 22 2009, 12:15 PM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=4982&pid=386123&st=0&#entry386123
by Pumpkin King and Emp
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=4959 and http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=3960 bump into each other while spending a day at Port Barley's bright and sunny beach. After testing each other's skills in a double battle, the couple head to the Purple Clamperl for a well-deserved meal. Unfortunately, Vincent realizes he has other plans and has to leave his new friend alone in the seafood restaurant.
Note: Emp and I discontinued posting so I took the liberty of finishing the RP so Vincent can move onto bigger and better adventures.
Posted by: Bill Nye Jul 25 2009, 01:33 PM
GONE FISHING:
General comments: It's a shame, I remember reading this a long time ago and hoping it'd get restarted. I can't give out really big levels, because of the shortness. Really, the minimum is 20 posts, but I guess I'll let it slide.
Vincent Water- PK (click to showhide)
11/15
Participation - 2
Skill - 4
Activity - 2
Battling - 3
I like Vincent, and you play him well. He's got the right amount of shyness and courtesy to make him believable. The battle was well done, and the beginning was nice too.
Charlie Cinder- Emp (click to showhide)
11/15
Participation - 2
Skill - 4
Activity - 2
Battling - 3
A nice entrance. That poor Stunky! Shame you poofed, though.
Posted by: Bill Nye Jul 25 2009, 04:17 PM
loldoublepost
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=5211
I feel pretty bad this took so long.
Anyway, follow the misadventures of Matt Fletcher and his rag-tag band of companions as he tries to get to Arasam. Along the way, the PokeGear system is knocked out, a Skarmory is fought, misunderstandings are had, a boy is crushed by a tree, hooligans are brought to justice, and Matt finds his old Combee.
Not exactly a hugely deep story.
The players:
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=3889- Myself
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=5687- Webbyness
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?act=findpost&pid=80322- Shiny Ninetails
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=4608- Saved of Grace
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=6193&st=0&p=101894&#entry101894- tiakall
Posted by: Master Houndoom Jul 27 2009, 09:36 AM
My first grading RP, and it's a doozy! 5 participants and five pages! Whoo!
If you wish to appeal the grading, please PM me and we can discuss.
Matt Fletcher (click to showhide)
Matt Fletcher is an interesting character, half altruistic adventurer, half spoiled rich boy. I enjoyed reading this story immensely. As always, I enjoy when someone either does or mentions an even that connects the entire RP together, and you did, twice (the Pokégear system going out was something you initiated, and the mention of Team Deception was something taken from another RP). Kudos on connecting the various and sundry RPs.
3 Participation levels
5 Skill levels (you did well pushing the RP along)
2 Activity levels (You were consistant, and to me you barely made the 2 mark, in comparison to the rest)
5 Battle levels
15/15
David Anderson (click to showhide)
David started strong, and petered out about half way through. You had some good ideas (your charmander going berserk when David was injured was a good touch) but also had some things you need to work on (a charmander should not know mega kick, flamethrower, or aerial ace this soon, game mechanics notwithstanding. Your beginning posts were short, but you did make the minimum so I did not dock you. However, I bring it up because it would be nice to have you give more detail in the future.
1 Participation level (you left halfway through)
2 Skill levels (mentioned above, and some pretty bad grammar and spelling issues)
1 Activity level (You were strong in the beginning and petered out in the end)
3 Battle levels (would have been 5 had you stayed to the end, because I'm sure you would have participated in the final battle)
7/15
Dinah 'Xiao' Pan (click to showhide)
Xiao is an interesting character, and I believe you played her consistently. There are some grammar errors and spelling situations you should bone up on, but in the long run you did a fantastic job. I did dock you on battle points because Xiao had only the one. Also, there was confusion in the name. Does she think of herself as Dinah or Xiao? You've mixed the name referring to her in your posts.
3 Participation levels
3 Skill levels (grammar and spelling)
2 Activity levels (you were there to the end)
3 Battle levels (one battle, knocked out early in the final battle)
11/15
Zeke Matthews (click to showhide)
Zeke is a strong, basic character and provided a much needed backbone to the party. Aipom was well thought out, using her timid nature in battle, and some of the attacks you used in battle were described in interesting ways. Spelling and grammar mistakes were minor, so I didn't dock for those.
3 Participation levels
5 Skill levels
2 Activity levels
5 Battle levels (you participated in every major battle)
15/15
Thomas Nikado (click to showhide)
A pokémon Ranger is hard to play, but I think you did a fine job at it. You came in very late so I dropped one level from participation, but the rest was very well done indeed. Toneri was cute and well played as well without being intrusive. The only real problem I have Is his ability to understand pokémon, but I did not dock for that. My suggestion is to make it a little more vague, that he has gotten a feel for the meaning rather than the exact words.
2 Participation levels
5 skill levels
1 Activity level (you came in half way and were non-existent at the end)
3 Battle levels (you missed the last battle)
12/15
Posted by: MystykFyre Aug 1 2009, 12:57 AM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=16929&st=0 has been completed for now, and will be continued in a second version that hopefully more people will join... Seriously, it's not and never has been a private RP! Geez...
Players involved:
Anduril- http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=15819&st=0&p=373650&#entry373650
Me, of course- http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=15336
Posted by: Master Houndoom Aug 3 2009, 11:03 AM
QUOTE
No matter what, everyone gets 3 levels, distributed between their pokemon according to use, as long as they finish an RP. Of course, if they drop out, depending on where, they lose so many of these "free" levels. We need the free ones so that our new, inexperienced RPers still have incentive to RP and improve.
Next, we have 5 levels that are based on the skill of the RPer. So, these are based on quality of post. They're also divided up between the two pokemon based on use. This means that our better RPers get more levels, which they should rightfully have.
Next would be 2 levels for activity, or number of posts. This one's easy, we just have to figure out how many posts an RPer needs for 1 level, and how many for both levels. I was thinking 17 posts for the one level, and 30 posts for both levels.
Finally, 5 levels are awarded based on actual battling. So, basically, how much a pokemon battles, and how well written the battles are. This is seperate from quality of post. If someone battles with a pokemon even once, they get 1 of these levels. The rest should be mod discretion.
So, this totals up to a possible 15 levels for an RPer. Only 10 can be awarded to one pokemon though, giving incentive for RPers to catch more pokemon to add to their teams.
This was the first effort for both of you, and it was a pretty good one. Please keep that in mind given the scoring. (ominous music).
The RP in general was very short, barely over a page. It would have been better to continue the travel to the border of Lenoilia and start the new RP in the town. Yes, you were limited by the number of players, but there was still plenty of material.
Mystyk (click to showhide)
You have an interesting character, and you've developed her pretty well. However, you spent almost as much space and time with OOC notes directly on the page. In writing, it is important not to break the immersion of the reader with a lot of reminders that this is all a story. If you can't find another place for OOC notes, then at least put them behind a spoiler tag. The better option is a topic in the PANE Discussion forum, or PMs among the players in your RP. Because of the notes, her being blind, which could have been a dramatic reveal during the battle, was instead easily guessed in the first post. The OOC docked you a bit on the skill points.
Also, your posts were painfully short at times, not even getting the unwritten requirement of a paragraph. That docked you a bit on the skill points as well.
There was a battle, and it was well written. In this I am pretty forgiving about short posts, because you have to take move by move or you end up Godmoding. The battle was pretty well thought out.
I have a problem with using the riolu to see, especially such a "young" riolu. Typically, riolu are barely aware of aura, seeing them as ripples instead of waves. Telepathic communication would be sketchy at best. Perhaps as the riolu grows more, it would be better at the things you describe, but I'm going to have to ask you to limit this ability somehow. I have not removed points for this at all.
3/3 levels for Participation.
3/5 levels for skill
1/2 level for activity (short RP)
3/5 levels for battle (1 battle with two pokémon a piece, well played.)
10/15
Glen (click to showhide)
You've got the making of a real jerk of a character, and that's not meant as an insult. It's good to see a character that isn't a nice, goody two shoes. You could take Glen any direction, even make him a bad guy, if you so desired. I found it refreshing.
Like above, the OOC notes in your RPs distracted from the story. I thought, at first, you were a little god mode-y with the cyndaquil, but then I looked at your profile. In that particular battle, it was well played. However, the shortness of the posts as well as the OOC notes hurt your score, and having one post in it's entirety be an OOC note hurt it even more.
The battle was the same as Mystik's, see her comments for my feelings on the battle.
3/3 levels for participation
2/5 levels for skill
1/2 levels for activity (short RP)
3/5 levels for battle (1 battle with two pokémon a piece, well played.)
9/15
Please keep going, these characters are engaging!
Posted by: Cube Aug 3 2009, 03:05 PM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=14832 is complete!
Following the events of Setting Out To Barley, Spencer, Waker, Connie, and Verity head to the Port Barley Practice Contest Hall, where Waker, Spencer, and Connie compete against a group of other coordinators in a Special Rules Practice Contest. (Note: The official rules for weren't established at the time this RP was started, so we kind of winged it).
Meanwhile, Verity's Igglybuff Egg hatched, causing hilarious problems for the other coordinators, resulting in a battle with a very angry Zangoose.
Finally, on the final round between Spencer and Elysia, a group of mysterious men led by the sinister Maria attack the facility with their Shadow Pokemon, forcing the group to fight for their lives!
...Bad summary, I know.
Major Highlights in this RP:
- Waker, Connie, and Spencer are introduced to the Furoh Contest Circuit.
- Verity's Igglybuff Egg Hatches into Candyfloss.
- The villainous Pokemon Hunter Maria is introduced.
- Agent Jennifer of the International Police is introduced.
- Spencer and Waker are left to care for a pair of Shadow Pokemon, Logan the Scyther, and Locke the Ekans.
- Mary and Azzy each learn a new attack, and Celia learns a creative application of Aqua Ring.
- Spencer relives some bad memories from the first Shadow Pokemon incident in Orre.
- The group departs for Moo Moo Land, paving the way for the next RP.
This RP Stars...
- Lindley as http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=13417
- MAREEP/ROMANA as http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=13416
- Nezzie/Mechanical Lullaby as http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=13501
- Cube/CubeB as http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=12964
New Pokemon:
Candyfloss (F):
(1)
Logan (M):
(3) (Shadow)
Locke (M):
(4) (Shadow)
New NPCs:
Mr. Contesta
Jillian Meridian
"Maria"
Professor Joseph Willow
Agent Jennifer
Wilhelmina "Bill" Lily (Verity's Mom)
Stacy Thorn (Spencer's Sister)
Creepy Voice Guy
-Coordinators-
Charley Drake
Epaminondas or "Mondie"
Elysia Ulright
Returning NPCs
Uta Refson
Marian Tyler
Also Starring:
Countless Incidental Grunts, Schoolchildren, Sponsors, and Police Officers.
Posted by: Master Houndoom Aug 4 2009, 07:44 PM
My apologies for the length of wait. I actually HAVE been a busy guy.
This team is truly a joy to read, and as I read, I was afraid that I might be exhibiting favoritism. I loved reading the first post with this group, and I requested the ability to grade the next one. I have yet to be disappointed. The girls are adorable without being cavity enducing, and the boys are whipcrack smart without being overly so. Everyone has their flaws, and that's refreshing to see them not negated by how uber awesome their other abilities are. Also, you didn't make yourselves look like you could win a contest on the first go. That's a big problem in most RPs, but I haven't seen people be the best right off the bat in PANE yet. There isn't a lot of critiquing I can do, but I will point out things I liked, and there were things to look out for. Your NPCs were well thought out, and played like characters of their own.
Verity (click to showhide)
I loved her fear of miltanks, and using Courage as a hat. Candyfloss is... hilarious, actually, but watch that Covet doesn't become a way to get any item in the game. Her stance on shiny pokemone is cute! You haven't done it without proper explanation, but I felt a Dire Warning™ was missing here.
3 levels for participation
5 levels for skill
2 levels for activity
5 levels for battle
15/15
Connie (click to showhide)
Constance is definitely the more assertive of the Veristance doublet, but it's noce to see she also has difficulties. I like that her pokémon are particularly naughty (Mary licking all the blue pokéblocks made me laugh), and that she doesn't have full control yet. Watch the movelist; I did mention it in the RP itself, and we agreed that it would slide due to it being overlooked in the app, but please consider not using Fury Cutter any more with Victoria.
3 levels for participation
5 levels for skill
2 levels for activity
5 levels for battle
15/15
Spencer (click to showhide)
After seeing your three companions, I was a bit worried that Spencer was a little commonly-done-pokemon-hero for the rest. You've proven me wrong, thankfully. His history in Orre gives him just enough niavete to be believable, but still use his specialized knowledge. The scene with the shadow scyther was pretty good, and the background given was creative. Watch your spelling (this dire warning is neither diring nor warning very well!)
3 levels for participation
5 levels for skill
2 levels for activity
5 levels for battle
15/15
Waker (click to showhide)
Waker's muteness is an asset to making him interesting, and it's nice to see that he doesn't let it get him down. The commands he does in the contest setting, I felt, were inspired. Very well played, and his preference for poison types is generally interesting. You play him well. Watch the spelling, however, as well.
3 levels for participation
5 levels for skill
2 levels for activity
5 levels for battle
15/15
I look forward to the next chapter
Posted by: Master Houndoom Aug 16 2009, 02:54 PM
Ooooh Doooooc!
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=14871 is now finished and submitted for grading.
Participants:
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=4110
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=6401
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=3869
Meiko "Why Are You Listing Me, I'm Not A Player Character" Omura
Summary:
After what has been internally dubbed as the Battle on Mount Carello, the gang ties to relax a bit. However, Tuesday is plagued by worsening dreams, culminating in her frantic flight from the gym, Meiko deals with her tumultuous heart and her overly pressuring mother, and Darryn deals with his first gym battle and a boy who he just want to be more than sparring partners with.
Oh, and Jaima gets his badge.
Posted by: MystykFyre Aug 20 2009, 08:14 PM
Boo.
Yes, it's me again. Anduril's having some problems with internet, so we're gonna turn in the RP and wait until his internet's fixed to start the final one in the chain. It'll take me a while to come up with another catchy name... >.>
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=17407
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=15819
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=15336
(Only two characters again >.> I really don't see why everyone avoids the RPs I make here. *shakes head* Next time, I'm joining one that's already started.)
A couple things:
1) My name's Mystyk, not Mystik.
2) I tried as best as I could to fix the problem about the Aura-sight, but sometimes I forgot, and my internet's not exactly in the best of shape. Some of the posts disappear off the end of the page, meaning that I can't edit some of the posts, and I apologize for anything that was a combination of my horrible memory and my horrible internet.
Posted by: Master Houndoom Aug 22 2009, 01:49 PM
QUOTE
No matter what, everyone gets 3 levels, distributed between their pokemon according to use, as long as they finish an RP. Of course, if they drop out, depending on where, they lose so many of these "free" levels. We need the free ones so that our new, inexperienced RPers still have incentive to RP and improve.
Next, we have 5 levels that are based on the skill of the RPer. So, these are based on quality of post. They're also divided up between the two pokemon based on use. This means that our better RPers get more levels, which the should rightfully have.
Next would be 2 levels for activity, or number of posts. This one's easy, we just have to figure out how many posts an RPer needs for 1 level, and how many for both levels. I was thinking 17 posts for the one level, and 30 posts for both levels.
Finally, 5 levels are awarded based on actual battling. So, basically, how much a pokemon battles, and how well written the battles are. This is seperate from quality of post. If someone battles with a pokemon even once, they get 1 of these levels. The rest should be mod discretion.
So, this totals up to a possible 15 levels for an RPer. Only 10 can be awarded to one pokemon though, giving incentive for RPers to catch more pokemon to add to their teams.
OK. This was much improved with the OOC thing. It has still happened, but not to much. I advise you, in the future, to either have an RP Discussion thread in the forums, use PMs, or use the spoiler tag to hide the OOC comments. I did
not take off points at this time for that.
There was an NPC death. Unless Doc contradicts me, which is his right, I am not callng for a retcon or docking points for it, either. HOWEVER, in the future, PM a mod. This RP still has youngsters in it, and I at least want a disclaimer on the top if you plan this, and mod approval in the future.
Mystyk Pyrus (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3
Skill: 4/5
Activity: 1/2
Battle: 3/5
Total: 12/15
Much better with the OOC comments, much better quality. I did doc you for some inconsistancy, which you explained, but I believe part of the skill of RP is having a plan in mind and changing it as needed. I am still wary of Ray's powers. How a small riolu has telepathy, and control of his aura enough to allow a human to see through his eyes is still lost on me, however, you played it well when he was hurt. Advice (I did not take points for anything mentioned in this): You might not want to have Mystyk move her head to look at people directly, as the sight would be focused by the riolu more than her, so it would be more like it was being displayed before her eyes. Handle it as you will, however, that is only a suggestion. Also, your battle was more like a beatdown and less like a battle, so I docked it for that.
Glen Reed (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3
Skill: 3/5
Activity: 1/2
Battle: 5/5
Total: 12/15
As above, much better quality and lack of OOC notes. I liked that Glen is heartless, and you play it well. He MAY be softening toward Mystyk, which is also being played well, if I happen to be right. One thing is that you've repeated the idea that he is heartless and emotionless so many times, I found myself a bit bored with the repetition. Activity was docked because the RP was short and cut off. Not for a bad reason, but other RPs are getting less than full marks with slightly more RPs.
Posted by: Arconious Aug 27 2009, 05:30 PM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=14221
1. Gabryle - Luke Aleq - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=13835
2. Arconious - Dramus Draccius - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=14209
3. RDM - Roland Desmund MacKenzie - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=14049
4. MapleBane - Aulstan Quai - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=14358
5. Doc Ock - Gunpei - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=14491
Life on the Road was a RP about a group of people falling victims of circumstance and ending up in the same place at the same time, where after a false accusation saying Dramus' fake arm was a snag machine, ended up agreeing to travel together. Unfortunately, I had to take a bit of an absense, and when that happened, the others in my group wasn't sure when they should post, and by the time I got back the majority of the group had lost interest in the RP, so it was cut a bit short.
Otherwise, Dramus caught a Ralts early on, and I believe Roland may have caught a Munchlax, though, I'm not exactly sure what he caught there. Dramus also, towards the end of the RP obtained a package that was to contain a pokedex, a pokegear, and a berry case that was full of various types of berries, but he didn't get a chance to open it during the actual RP.
Posted by: Living Arrow Aug 30 2009, 07:02 AM
OK, I shall be covering http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=14221&st=0 but I need to make sure of things first.
1. This should really be submitted and acknowledged by the RP creator.
2. It is the responisbility of the RP creator to make sure everyone is "finished". I mean, Roland did *not* catch that Munchlax - he was about to begin battle with it.
With so many unfinished things going on, I am loathe to post your grades until at least 2 weeks have passed. Please pm the rest of the group, confirming that they wish for the RP to end. Forward me their responses and I shall make a judgement call on what shall be done.
If, Arconius, you wish to jump out of that RP and start another, be my guest. However, you will not get a grade until Life on the Road has been successfully closed down.
Posted by: Proby3 Sep 26 2009, 11:37 AM
OK, RP finished, so please grade it.
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=19857&st=0 and http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=19857&view=findpost&p=546424 (There's two chapters in the story- first link shows you the first chapter, second link the start of the second.)
Proby3 as http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=18464
Awesome Venusaur as http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=19077
Inksplatter as http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=20023
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=20012
SLASH was a story of Alex Slasher, or the beggining of it, a boy who had nightmares that his Torchic was going to be murdered. He started on a Pokemon journey from a small town, and travelled to Petropolis, where he met two people, Drew Nelson and Melody Hart. Blaze, Alex' Torchic, something happens to him in Petropolis, but he's alright when they leave. This RP involved made up details on my part to do with Team Deception. If you feel these are innapropriate, then dock ME levels, not my fellow RPers, as I was the one who began it.
We did have a few problems with innactivity, coming from Inksplatter, as soon as she started school. Unfortunately, she therefore took little part in Chapter two of the story, so we agreed that she would leave the two boys near the end of Cahpter two. To replace her, we've created an NPC that I will Pm you just as soon as I've finished his profile.
Posted by: Master Houndoom Sep 28 2009, 02:49 PM
QUOTE
No matter what, everyone gets 3 levels, distributed between their pokemon according to use, as long as they finish an RP. Of course, if they drop out, depending on where, they lose so many of these "free" levels. We need the free ones so that our new, inexperienced RPers still have incentive to RP and improve.
Next, we have 5 levels that are based on the skill of the RPer. So, these are based on quality of post. They're also divided up between the two pokemon based on use. This means that our better RPers get more levels, which the should rightfully have.
Next would be 2 levels for activity, or number of posts. This one's easy, we just have to figure out how many posts an RPer needs for 1 level, and how many for both levels. I was thinking 17 posts for the one level, and 30 posts for both levels.
Finally, 5 levels are awarded based on actual battling. So, basically, how much a pokemon battles, and how well written the battles are. This is separate from quality of post. If someone battles with a pokemon even once, they get 1 of these levels. The rest should be mod discretion.
So, this totals up to a possible 15 levels for an RPer. Only 10 can be awarded to one pokemon though, giving incentive for RPers to catch more pokemon to add to their teams.
All right, I believe this was a worthy effort all around. It seemed a bit fast at first, and you didn't seem to find a real point where you agreed. Also, there was some bunnying that I thought wasn't done well, especially in the instance of Melody's leaving. I would have preferred that this was handled by note, or at least on a more friendly term, so that bridges were not burned should Ink be able to come back.
Grammar and spelling is very important in an RP, so brush up on those factors. At this point, I did not subtract levels because of grammar or spelling, but it will be done in the future.
There were a few unrealistic scenarios that caused me to sit back and blink. I will point them out in the individual RPs.
Pokemon battles were short, and only one side was portrayed in most cases, not showing the attacks of the opponent pokemon. This went for NPCs as well as PCs. Battles should be give and take. More on this in the individual gradings.
Team Deception is not going to announce their name, especially if they're dressed as another team. That is their entire purpose, to pose as the other team to keep the focus off of them. In the future (and an announcement will be made to the general public about it) please PM a mod to add a new facet to Team Deception, so that we can add it to the wiki.
I notice your story changed directions in the middle. I don't know if it was intended to count as two RPs, but it is not going to be graded as two. It was all one topic, it's all one grade (from the OOC notes, I did not get the feeling that you intended that this be graded as two RPs, but I felt the warning was required)
Lastly, Proby insisted on the title and byline being put on each post. I counter-insist that you no longer do this. It detracts from the story. On the top post is fine, for the "new" chapter is fine, every post is not fine.
Alex Slasher (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3
Skill: 2/5 I felt that more description of what was happening was warranted, and the impossible situations, not limited to getting struck in the head and waking up with no ill effects, and defeating 6 guards. Also you bunnied, a lot, especially in the battle with the guards. That's a no no unless it is permitted by the bunnied person, and then there should be a note in the first post explaining where the bunnying is permitted.
Activity: 2/2 You lead the post and pushed it where needed. I would prefer to see less OOC in the posts themselves, but as they were hidden behind tags, I usually let that slide.
Battling: 2/5 Again, a lot of lopsided battles.Some of them were one or two hit battles, which, unless your pokemon were significantly higher than the opponent, isn't going to happen until 40-50, with type advantages.
Total: 9/15
Drew Nelson (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3
Skill: 2/5 Your sentences seemed to travel in circles a bit, which confused the RP. Also, some things were "retconned" when a situation was either passed over or misunderstood by your RPmates. The largest example was that you had Drew sleeping on the floor in a sleeping bag in your first post, but that was glossed over when it actually came time to sleep. I was going to mention, as well, that a pokemon center in Petropolis would be huge, and able to accommodate a lot of travellers. Lastly, a lot of your posts reiterated the poster before you, with direct quotes. This wouldn't normally be a problem, except that a lot of the instances where this happened, the quotes comprised a majority of your post.
Activity: 2/2
Battling: 2/5 You also had your share of one-sided battles, but there was one where I thought I should mention: You sicced your charmander on a seedot, using fire attacks, and it survived 6 or 7 of them. While I commend you on making the battle last longer, this is slightly unrealistic.
Total: 9/15
Melody Hart (click to showhide)
Participation: 2/3 You stayed for half. I hope you haven't left for good, but leave you did.
Skill: 3/5 Your grammar and spelling were a bit better, and the journal idea were a nice touch. You kept your character interacting. However, you followed a lot where you could have made a point to give your character her own voice. Whether this was being pressured by bunnying, or just going with the flow, I'd have liked to know more about Melody.
Activity: 1/2 You left halfway through. You were consistent while you were there.
Battling: 2/5 There wasn't a lot, and what was said about the others should be considered as well.
Total: 8/15
In conclusion, enjoyable but needs work. I encourage the lot of you to read some back posts to get a feel for your next destinations.
Posted by: Ceilni Oct 6 2009, 06:27 PM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=14996
Has been split.
Started: July. 8 2009, 2:45pm
Ended: July 30, 2009, 5:35pm
Total posts: 54 (Please keep in mind this used to be once huge 147+ post RP that we split. Thanks to Master Houndoom :>)
Darci sets up her tent just before a large storm comes. Syko and DC come to her tent, one hurt, the other not so. She takes in both of them and talks for a while. Along comes yet another person! Sora stumbles into the story and Darci sheilds her from the rain too. While they are talking, Syko sneaks away [Excuse].
Darci later shows another side her herself to the others, upsetting them slightly. She runs out to make it up to them, and later, after she returns, they fall into a no longer troubled sleep
HORRAY FOR HORRIBLE SUMMARIES~!
Participants:
* Red Kitten - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=15331&st=0&p=356196&#entry356196
* Syko - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=14489
* TR_Darci_Niguel/Ceilni - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=13860
* Shaymin Girl - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=11296
New Pokemon:
*http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=14996&view=findpost&p=350766 - Eevee - Lv.7 - Darci
NPCs:
Not yet
Posted by: Ceilni Oct 13 2009, 07:26 PM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=22704 was finished, yet was neglected for GP Grading post. Here it is :> (This is to be graded as a separate RP, remember! )
Started: July 31st, 2009, 4:21 PM
Ended: September 22nd, 2009, 5:22 PM
Total Posts: 91 (Please keep in mind this used to be once huge 147+ post RP that we split. Thanks to Master Houndoom :>)
(Bad) Summary:
In the morning DC, Darci, and Sora awaken to a clear beautiful morning. The signs of rain are all around, but the misty rain still filling the air a bit. They have a meager soup for breakfast and Sora leaves.
DC and Darci start once again for Arasam but eventually, their injuries and exhaustion make them stop to rest. However, as they stop to rest, they are jumped by a mysterious thief. With Darci's supplies and new Eevee 'Vincent' in her backpack and DC's supplies in hers, they will try to get their supplies back! They run after the thief, trying to catch him, however the outcome is rather unexpected.
HORRIBLE SUMMARY YEY
Participants:
*Red Kitten - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=15331
*Shaymin Girl - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=11296
*Ceilni - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=13860
*Marsh - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=19897
*Jewely - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=18955
New Pokemon:
*http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=22704&view=findpost&p=439196 - Shroomish - Lv.# - DC
NPCs:
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=22704&view=findpost&p=461430
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=15781
Posted by: Umbrae Calamitas Oct 13 2009, 11:29 PM
Amongst the Coming of the Storm, Part I
Grading
An interesting introductory piece which essentially allows us to get to know the characters through interaction with one another. Each of your characters have unique personalities and quirks, which is always nice to see.
I enjoyed reading this and learning about each of your characters in turn. You seemed to work well off of each other and kept the plot rolling through action and reaction.
I would like to offer a few suggestions that might help your roleplay flow a bit more smoothly:
A good deal of this post was reactionary - characters replying to a comment or question. When doing this, however, you often repeat the question, italicized, in your own post. While this is, of course, effective, it can sometimes work as a dam against what would otherwise be a good flow of writing.
An easy way to counteract this effect would be to communication prior to your post, asking another member what their specific character would do or say in this or that situation. Such a thing can be done through PMs for privacy, or simply in a discussion board. Bunnying each others' characters (with respective permission and a notice of such) is these situations might enable not only longer posts and better flow, but a faster movement of the plot.
Another suggestion is to have OOC comments ( concerning such things as whether or not someone can join the RP or who should react to a certain situation) confined to a discussion board for the RP or PMs. Again, it helps flow. It also make the RP board look a little nicer. And, to be blunt, it's annoying, when I'm in the midst of a good part, to see an OOC comment dangling in midair. :P I don't have time to catch it - I'm busy reading.
All in all, this RP was interesting and fun to read. I enjoyed the descriptions and learning about the characters. The plot was also quite wonderful - a group of strangers meeting in a tent amidst a storm.
I'm interested to see what is in store now for these characters, especially considering the mood swings, habitual injuring of oneself and each other, and the growing dynamic between characters.
Individual Grading
Ceilni - Darci (click to showhide)
Participation: 3 levels
Skill: 4 levels
You write nicely and it's wonderful to see good layers of description. However, in a number of your posts, you neglect to capitalize words that need to be capitalized, such as your "I"s. You may want to run a cursory edit over each post to make certain that such mistakes are not repeated. Otherwise, you did wonderfully, and I must commend you on your beautiful skill of writing dialogue - a sadly oft-neglected skill.
Activity: 2 levels
The most frequent poster, you were. Well, you did.
Okay, Yoda, scram.
You essentially ran the RP, which is a good thing. grin.gif Someone needs to be the leader and you kept the plot rolling along nicely. The welcoming each trainer into the tent reminded me the party skits from Who's Line Is It, Anyway?, off-hand, which was amusing and a lot of fun. Your character was always doing something and not simply lingering in the background, which is important.
Battling: 4 levels
Your battle, while coming upon abruptly - I loved how eevee was in your bag, eating your food the whole time - was very short. This, of course, was in part due to the fact that you were have a four-pokemon on one battle, but I still feel that the battle could have been played out a little longer.
Also, as a note, though you didn't lose points for this, when you capture a pokemon, please include a spoiler with the information (species, gender, level, etc) of the pokemon that you caught, to help the mods out a bit.
Total: 13/15
Syko - Syko (click to showhide)
Participation: 2 levels
Skill: 4 levels
Be careful of your dialogue. You may want to go over the rules of the "he said, she said" bits. You often capitalize these labels when, as continuing parts of a sentence, they should not be.
Otherwise, you write quite well. The only suggestion I might make is to put an extra space in between paragraphs, as it tends to make it slightly easier to read.
Activity: 1 level
You disappeared abruptly before even the middle of the RP, which was very disappointing, as I had been enjoying your character. Though you were prominent in the beginning because it was simply you and Ceilni, I couldn't give you more than 1 point for activity, as you pulled a remarkable Houdini act.
Battling: 4 levels
As with Ceilni's grading, the battle was very short, in part due to there being four pokemon against one. Again, I feel that the battle could have been played out a little longer.
Total: 12/15
Red Kitten - DC (click to showhide)
Participation: 3 levels
Skill: 5 levels
You write extremely well and I was happy to see wonderful grammar! I also adored the lovely long introductory post for your character's arrival. Lovely levels of description!
Activity: 2 levels
Once you joined the RP, you were a regular poster who stood on the other side of the wheel from Ceilni and kept the RP rolling. You seemed quite reactionary to the others' posts, occasionally helping to clarify something or offer your character's insight, which I enjoyed.
Battling: 0 levels
You did not participate in a battle in this RP.
Total: 10/15
Shaymin Girl - Sora (click to showhide)
Participate: 3 levels
Skill: 4 levels
Be careful of your dialogue. You may want to go over the rules of the "he said, she said" bits. You often capitalize these labels when, as continuing parts of a sentence, they should not be.
Activity: 2 levels
You came into the RP halfway through, but once you were there, you were a consistent poster. Your posts helped to further the plot along and equally show us more about your character.
Battling: 0 levels
You did not participate in a battle in this RP.
Total: 9/15
Posted by: 2gamers Oct 21 2009, 09:47 PM
Have You Ever Seen The Rain? Review of "Amongst the coming of a storm, part II"
First, I like the premise of this RP series. It starts with a group of kids looking for shelter during a storm, then snowballs into arun-in with a thief and even a river crossing gone wrong. Very nice.
Before I get to the grades, I will add the way the RP was divided greatly affected scores of the more recent members. If someone has a problem with a score, you may PM me. I also like to point out that there were two more additional captures than previously reported: Lucy's Sentret and Jewely's Ekans. Just stating that for the record.
So, without further ado…
Red Kitten - (DC) Dawn Catherine Moriarty (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3
For the majority of the RP, It was DC and Darci running the show. They appeared throughout all the RP, so full marks here.
Skill: 5/5
Even with a broken ankle, you still manage to show off DC’s athleticism. It takes some muscle to drag yourself through the wilderness with a broken ankle. I liked the description of her struggle; made her movements more realistic.
I’m beginning to see the beginnings of a unique relationship between DC and Darci. DC seems to serve as the moral grounding/designated sane person when Darci goes “Yandere”. It will be interesting to see how this affects DC in the long run.
Activity: 2/2
See the comments on participation.
Battle: 5/5
Darci vs. DC: I like the use of plans instead of specific moves. It gives DC a certain battle style and makes her pokemon somewhat unpredictable. Overall, a good battle. Though I would have liked to have seen more pokemon used, given the circumstances of the approaching storm, I can see why it was cut short.
Total: 15/15Nailed it.
.
Shaymin Girl - Sora Akuto (click to showhide)
Participation: 1/3
You had a few posts in the beginning, but you didn’t reappear until post # 63. Since you were only in a third of the RP, you received a third of the participation points.
Skill: 4/5
Keep in mind what others have posted. In post 63, you contradict the other RPers by saying that the ground is drying and it’s sunny. Since the RP takes place in a storm, I’m siding with the majority on weather. If this post had taken place at a different time, then that should be noted. I took a point off as a result.
Overall, your posts were of good length and fairly descriptive. Keep it up in the next RP.
Activity: 1/2
You stayed consistent in your posting, but you only contributed nine posts to the RP.
Battle: 0/5
Since Sora did not get into any battles, I can’t award any points for battling.
Total: 6/15
You weren’t in the RP long enough to get the full points. Perhaps consider planning a battle in the next part, should you want more points.
Ceilni - Darci Niguel/Yandere (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3
For the majority of the RP, It was DC and Darci running the show. They appeared throughout all the RP, so full marks here.
Skill: 5/5
Very nice Rping done. My favorite part was the river scene: the “invisible hands” of the river was a nice touch.
Overall, Darci is a good character. I would imagine it’s pretty challenging to play as a person with “mental issues”, but from what I’ve seen, it’s pretty convincing. I’ll be watching her in future RPs.
In some of your earlier posts, you added “a pause” if you couldn’t comment on a part of someone’s post. It’d be nice to see some elaboration rather than two words. That, or don’t even mention things you can’t comment on. It was only in a couple posts, so I didn’t take any points off for it. Just don’t let it become a habit.
Activity: 2/2
Obviously, good participation leads to good activity.
Battle: 5/5
Darci vs. DC: I like your use of code words for certain moves, though they became a little predictable after repetition. Once again, a good battle that played out fairly.
Total: 15/15 I award the highest of grades
.
Marsh – Lucy Mietsa (click to showhide)
Please mention when you capture a pokemon (in a spoiler box).
Participation: 1/3
You showed up in the last third of the RP (post #66). Thus, I can only give you a third of the participation points.
Skill: 2/5
I wanted to see more description in you posts. A lot of your posts contain simple three-four word sentences. That isn’t nearly enough to show the reader what’s going on. In one post, Kusy was hiking for an hour. What did she see along the way? How did she feel after the hike? In another, you describe the peanut butter as “a slow waterfall”. I wanted to see more of that.
In post 76, I saw some light bunnying of Darci and DC. You need permission from the other Rpers to do that, as well as post a spoiler box saying you have permission. It wasn’t anything major; I just want to nip that in the bud.
Finally, near the end, several of your posts were only a paragraph. The minimum requirement is two five-sentence paragraphs. It’ll be easier to reach this limit if you include more details.
Activity: 1/2
You didn’t have enough posts to properly gauge activity. I can only award half the points.
Battle: 1/5
Lucy vs. wild sentret: The battle wasn’t particularly long; again, there could have been more detail. What strategy was running through her head? What were her pokemon thinking? What was the sentret thinking? I wasn’t expecting anything epic, but I would have appreciated elaboration.
Total: 5/15
Try reading other RPs (as well as posts in here).
Jewely - Jewely Espell (click to showhide)
First,
please mention when you capture a pokemon (in a spoiler box).
Participation: 1/3
You showed up in the last third of the RP (post #58). Again, I can only give you a third of the participation points.
Skill: 4/5
Your first posts were great, especially the battle with the ekans. My favorite part was Jewely’s criticism of her hostesses’ ages. She’s not one to talk; perhaps she’s showing a bit of a snobbish side? In later posts, you did hit the minimum length, but I would have liked more details (example: how did the peanut butter taste to Jewely?).
Activity: 1/2
You didn’t have enough posts to properly gauge activity. I’m only going to award half of the points.
Battle: 5/5
Jewely vs. wild ekans: Nice start to Jewely’s adventure. It wasn’t a straightforward capture; there was a struggle. I like your description of fear from both Jewely and Telly. It’s very appropriate for a beginning trainer (and pokemon alike), especially a young one. Keep it up
.
Total: 11/15Nice start to PANE. You shouldn’t have too many problems in Part III, so long as you keep with it.
Posted by: Master Houndoom Oct 26 2009, 04:06 PM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=18928 is now ended and ready for grading.
Participants:
Living Arrow as http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=4110
Umbrae Calamitas as http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=6401
Master Houndoom as http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=3869
And Jerry Mathers as the Bidoof!
After both Darryn and Jaima participated in their gym battles, Darryn is approached to participate in the contest scene, unknown to him by none other than the Hall Leader himself! Nervous at first, Darryn convinced Jaima to enter with him, while Tuesday and Meiko watched from the stands. Darryn's performance was a jaw dropping event that showed everyone that Mr. Kellor belonged on the contest stage, although some people were not as happy about this as others. Following a prolonged debate over whether or not Darryn should have won (and by debate, I mean pokemon battle, and by belonged, I mean people took issue with the fact that he was new and still won), our group calls it a night and prepares to leave the next day. But not before Giving Tuesday a surprise birthday party!
Posted by: Doc Oct 26 2009, 11:15 PM
QUOTE
No matter what, everyone gets 3 levels, distributed between their pokemon according to use, as long as they finish an RP. Of course, if they drop out, depending on where, they lose so many of these "free" levels. We need the free ones so that our new, inexperienced RPers still have incentive to RP and improve.
Next, we have 5 levels that are based on the skill of the RPer. So, these are based on quality of post. They're also divided up between the two pokemon based on use. This means that our better RPers get more levels, which the should rightfully have.
Next would be 2 levels for activity, or number of posts. This one's easy, we just have to figure out how many posts an RPer needs for 1 level, and how many for both levels. I was thinking 17 posts for the one level, and 30 posts for both levels.
Finally, 5 levels are awarded based on actual battling. So, basically, how much a pokemon battles, and how well written the battles are. This is separate from quality of post. If someone battles with a pokemon even once, they get 1 of these levels. The rest should be mod discretion.
So, this totals up to a possible 15 levels for an RPer. Only 10 can be awarded to one pokemon though, giving incentive for RPers to catch more pokemon to add to their teams.
It was gud rp.
Well, it was an interesting turn of events, and it all flowed well, which made it an easy (read: 3 hour) read. Most of everyone kept in pace and did a pretty good job in their fights, but that's never been a problem for the ROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOGUE FAAAAAALCON.
Living Arrow- Darryn Kellor (click to showhide)
I've developed a little cheer for Darryn. I fist pump and say, "FIGHTO!"
...I didn't say it was a -good- cheer. Poor Darryn, he got so (realistically) shook up at the contest. Even when he means well, he's constantly being taken the wrong way.
The only problem I had with his contest was the eye-raping colours of the description of India's moves. But then I highlighted it all and all was well. (except now everyone's gonna be all "Woodrow totally stole that singing idea from that last guy, Donny!")
3/3 Participation
2/2 Activity
5/5 Battle
The appeal counts more than enough for the Battle section, imo, and Darryn, for all of his nervousness, was good at appealing and fighting Troy.
5/5 Skill
Like there's any surprise here. However, I still have a
mental image of Darryn in sweatpants*and no amount of cheap booze will assuage that. Not that I condone that. Don't drink, kids, or you'll end up like Doc.
15/15: S Rank.
Umbrae Calamitis- Tuesday Ilia 'Silence' Dogood Berdison (click to showhide)
I have more than my fair share of geeky little giggles at Tuesday's references, and I don't know it whether to be sad or not that I got them all. Her rivalry with Reilly was...cute is the only word springing to mind, but that's not right...
Perhaps the Houndour wasn't as well developed
as the other Pokemon*, but I felt, other than "oh, he's happy but is also sad
", he didn't get much screen time.
The Spanish speaking Riolu is pretty borderline, especially since it's -a kind of- human language, even if Tuesday can't speak fluent Spanish. Just mentioning it.
See, it's obvious I have very little to critique cause you guys leave very little wrong for me to pick at.
Be worse plz.
3/3 Participation
2/2 Activity
5/5 Battle
I liked Tuesday's reaction to losing her battle.
5/5 Skill
15/15: S Rank.
Master Houndoom- Jaima Kuonji (click to showhide)
Boy, that Jaima's sure becoming a lady's man. From Joy to Meiko, he gets as much action as Barney Stinson.
I like how Mercury's dark type phobia carried from Gigarte Park to here. Aaaand, well, I like Jaima. He's a good guy. :P Not that I don't like Darryn and Tuesday, but, yeah.
3/3 Participation
2/2 Activity
Battle 5/5
Yes yes, you know how to battle. :P Despite Jaima's unease in silk(!), he appealed very cool-ly. Which leaves me pondering how one can successfully appeal in a "smart" fashion. Be a math nerd?
Skill 5/5
No surprises here. Any critiques I'd have would be nitpicks like "OH YOU SPELLED A WORD WRONG." I would have said, "explain the Japanese more," but then I remembered the Acronym function.
15/15: S Rank.
What th- Jabba. What are you doing there? You're not a medal. You're not even metal.
Jerry Mathers- bidoof (click to showhide)
So be honest, who was behind that Kanye thing? I don't even think that should be hidden. It was just marvelous. Also, for a moment, I was thinking about how Meiko didn't battle much, and how I should dock a point for that. Then I remembered she was an NPC.
Posted by: Dragon Maiden Nov 4 2009, 09:03 PM
Well I think its about time we wrapped this up and since Cube disappeared I'll post Moo-Moo Land
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=18030
Characters
1. Cube - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=12964
2. Butterfree Farm - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=13417
3. Mechanical Lullaby - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=13501
4. ROMANA - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=13416
5. Dragon Maiden - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=17136
A Few Notes:
1. Because one of our RPers disappeared and because the others got a little busy with RL this RP is only half finished, but it's long enough to be considered for grading.
2. I submitted this because discussion on what we were going to do with the RP has come to a complete standstill. I sent out a PM saying if anyone disagreed about me submitting it then say so and got no reply from any of them so... If anyone comes charging in saying don't grade it then I suppose you can leave it be, but I'm not sure I can take another day of waiting for an ultimate decision.
Posted by: Ceilni Nov 7 2009, 12:51 PM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=22705 has brought the end.
Started: September 22, 2009, 6:17 pm
Ended: November 7, 2009, 10:03 am
Total posts: 50
Waking up in the morning, DC and Darci continue on, the other girls seemingly more content with lingering the forest for a little bit longer.
They continue on are run into a rather coarse character, a hunter. After having a bit of a verbal scuffle with him, they move on.
Before long, they are attacked by a rather fierce Sneasel. After a long scuffle and hard conflict, DC finally manages to capture the hostile creature and names it Dusk Arcana, giving it a second name to show distance. During the battle Darci's Torchic Evolves.
They continue on and DC breaks from the path a bit, where she battles, and captures a male Nidoran, Napoleon.
Later, they hear noises of battle and go to join the conflict with an Ursaring and Arman, the hunter. They manage to escape, and DC's charmander evolves!
Participants:
* Red Kitten - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=15331
* Ceilni - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=13860
* Shaymin Girl - Sora 'erased from existence' Akuto
* Marsh - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=19897
* Jewely - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=18955
Evolutions:
* -> http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=22705&view=findpost&p=616215
* -> http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=22705&view=findpost&p=640515
New Pokemon:
*http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=22705&view=findpost&p=622745
*http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=22705&view=findpost&p=627465
NPCs:
*Arman Tremain (Hunter)
Posted by: Master Houndoom Nov 9 2009, 03:18 PM
First, I was very sad to see Real Life interfere so extensively with this RP. It was brilliantly done by a brilliant group, and it was sad to see its need to be cut short like it was.
As such, I will likely be a little more stringent with the grading than I usually am. This is, in effect, a partial RP, and the grading is therefore going to reflect that.
Also, my critiques are not going to be as in depth as they have been in the past, nor will they be as in depth as other mods. This is a reflection of two things: I am mourning the loss of time (for you and myself) and am, generally, lazy.
Butterfree Farm (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3
You were available until the RP ended. That is what the Participation grade is about
Activity: 2/2
You were also active. Despite the fact that the RP was cut off, the activity was consistent throughout, and many current RPs are ending around the 3 or 4 page range.
Skill: 5/5
There is no doubt in my mind that everyone played their character to the fullest of their abilities. This score is likely not to change for any of you.
Battling: 1/5
Unfortunately, I could not find a place where any of your pokemon battled. Some of them are less than capable of battling, but Butchette has, so far, only launched a kick at a pearless spoink so that Verity could capture her. At this point, a low score for battling, but the actions were well within character.
Total: 11/15
Cube (click to showhide)
Participation: 1/3
You weren't here for a lot of what made the last few posts, and the time stamps reflect that. As such, I have docked a point.
Activity: 1/2
See above.
See Butterfree Farm
Skill: 5/5
See Butterfree Farm
Battling: 3/5
Vincent evolved and battled a tauros, which made it one of the very few battles in this RP. It was well played, and exciting to read. But it was only one, and relatively short as well.
Total: 10/10
Dragon Maiden: (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3
Activity: 2/2
Skill: 4/5
On this, I feel I need to comment: Aussie does not seem to fit in (yet) with the rest of the group. This is, bolded, not a bad thing. She is true to character and has not been modified to fit in. That is rare, and nice to see. Kudos. You need to watch your dialogue, however. You have paragraphs where two people are speaking, and you should start a new paragraph every time there's a new "voice". Also, many many OOC notes, which I usually don't mind, but three cuts for OOC in one RP is a bit too much. Seperate, I'd have let them pass, together I had to remove a point.
Battling: 2/5
It was a short battle to catch the ponyta, but it was a bit more in depth than some others.
Total: 11/15
Mechanical Lullaby: (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3
Activity: 2/2
Skill: 5/5
Waker is fun to read.
Battling: 3/5
You had a decent battle at the end, where both of your pokemon evolved. I rather liked it. However, it was only one battle, so it did not get the full points.
Total: 13/15
ROMANA (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3
Activity: 2/2
Skill: 5/5
I left this comment off of Butterfree Farm's critique because I wanted both grades to be seen before I mentioned it; The posts in which both girls get onto the helicopter and ride it, and their changing reactions, was sheer brilliance.
Battle: 0/5
I saw no battle at all in Connie's posts, and for that, I couldn't give any points. There didn't even seem to be an attempt. Again, well in character, and the story was not finished, but I have to go with what I have.
Total: 10/15
I would beg of you to find a way to continue, but I know Real Life, and she is not always pleasant. I hope you can bring these characters back to the spotlight. I know there is a question as to whether or not any of this remains canon, so I will tell you: Catches, evolutions, and the like do remain canon, but you can feel free to gloss over the events, or replay them as needed.
Posted by: 2gamers Nov 14 2009, 08:33 AM
Review of “Amongst the Coming of the Storm, Part III”
Finally, we reach the conclusion to the first adventure of Darci and DC. This is good, because I’m not sure how long they could have lasted with all the injuries they accumulated. I wasn’t entirely convinced that the hunter was a bad guy (carrying a dart gun seems a bit tame), especially after DC started eyeing those teddiursas . It’s so obvious: DC secretly hoped the hunter would catch the ursaring so she could have the tediursas all to herself. I think we know who the real villain in this RP was… I’ll save the rest of my analysis for individual review.
It’s too bad that the rest of the cast did not appear. That greatly affected the scores of Jewely and Shaymin Girl. Note that Marsh didn’t even post in this RP, so she didn’t get a grade.
Red Kitten - DC Moriarty (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3
This turned into a two-person RP, so your participation was pretty much necessary for RP survival
.
Skill: 5/5
I’m not sure what else to add from my last review. I like how the ankle was becoming more of a problem as she started walking without the aid of the walking stick she had previously. I was hoping for a zombie walk, in which she would drag her injured foot, maybe groan and scare children/pokemon, but oh well. Overall, same as the last RP.
Activity: 2/2
See Participation.
Battle: 5/5
Vs. Sneasel: The double team gave you both an opportunity for points. The battle was handled well ; it actually felt like a double team was necessary to take down the sneasel.
Vs. Nidoran: This battle revealed Cheapie’s fear of the poison type. Though it would have been nice for the pidgey to win this fight and conquer her fear, Devil stepped in to finish the job. The charmander seems to be DC’s go-to pokemon. It’d be interesting to see how she fights against something like a water-type, where her other pokemon would have to step up. Also nice intro into this; let’s hope it continues to be mating season for more comedic effect
.
Vs. Hunter: It took the combined efforts of DC, Darci, and the Ursaring to fight off the hunter, so no overpowering problems. Lots of well written fight scenes, so full marks
Total: 15/15Yay!
Ceilni - Darci Niguel/Yandere (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3
As leader, participation is a requirement. You did, so full marks
Skill: 5/5
So Darci is apparently the Incredible Hulk
. Every time she gets angry, she changes into another person. Not sure if that’s what you were aiming for, but that’s what I got out of it. With the encounter with the hunter, Darci ought to be careful of who she goes nuts on. I see legal trouble in her future, which would make for some interesting scenarios. I really like the description of Darci going through branches, as well as the “pure flaming agony” of her wrist.
Activity: 2/2
See Participation.
Battle: 5/5
Vs. Sneasel: This turned into a pretty good struggle. The combusken made quick work of her foe in the end, which makes sense considering weaknesses.
Vs. Hunter: Again, good fight scenes. There really isn’t much more to add.
Total: 15/15Woo-Hoo!
Shaymin Girl - Sora Akuto (click to showhide)
Total: 3/15
You made two posts in the entire RP. That’s not enough to really gauge your skill. I can only award a minimum score. Try again when you are able to actively participate.
Jewely - Jewely Espell (click to showhide)
Total: 3/15
You made two posts in the entire RP. That’s not enough to really gauge your skill. I can only award a minimum score. Try again when you are able to actively participate.
Posted by: Douken Sota Nov 21 2009, 06:14 PM
alright, we just finished up http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=21712 after the while it was up. We brought it to a fast close for the amount of people vanishing, but the people who took part were:
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=21623(Me)
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=21623(EpicLunatic)
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=21717(Euphraim)
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=22026(Xal)
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=22271(Fleeting Eternity)
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=22674(Berry314)
And pretty much, we had people coming to Barley from everywhere for everyone starting their journeys. Long delays in posts came because of inactiveness.
Posted by: Living Arrow Nov 29 2009, 05:30 PM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=17911&st=0 has been cut off early due to inactivity.
The following grading reflects the incomplete nature of the RP and so participants received less exp than they would have if it had been completed.
rt117: http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=17616
Participation - 3/3
Skill - 2/5
Activity - 1/2
Battling - 2/5
Total: 8/15
Tsubasa4Ever: http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=18447
Participation - 3/3
Skill - 1/5
Activity - 1/2
Battling - 2/5
Total: 7/15
Lady Vivian: http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=18434
Participation - 3/3
Skill - 3/5
Activity - 1/2
Battling - 2/5
Total: 9/15
Posted by: 2gamers Dec 3 2009, 11:50 PM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=16326&st=0 is finally finished!
Starring:
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=10334&st=0#entry212011- 2gamers
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=15236- Immortal Whisper
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=15690- Connie
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=16219- Stoicheio
In BBBBBB, Pan arrives on the Furoh mainland, landing in Barley. It was her day off, so she decided to treat herself to a free massage class. There, she meets Andrew, Connie, and Rosie, and together, they explore Barley Boardwalk. They discover the Pokemon Fan Club, solve the mystery of the pokemon thieves, and Pan gains a new friend.
Notes: Inactivity plagued this RP. Stoicheio and Immortal Whisper had school issues, while Connie apparently suffered Internet failure. After a month of inactivity, I decided it was time to close it down. Once again, I had to write up the big climax, though I admit that post left much to be desired.
Other: Fenrir, a level 14 growlithe who knows Morning Sun, joined the crew. Turnip evolved into an ivysaur, and Chi-Chi the pachirisu learned Flash. 2gamers wants comments .
Posted by: Nogster Dec 6 2009, 10:32 PM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=23107&st=0&start=0 is now a finished RP.
Characters:
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=22303- Nogster
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=21607- Spearow
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=23446- Ariadan
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=18464- Golden Lucario
In this RP, Eric gets to a small town on a cliff where he has an adventure he did not expect.
Joining him on this adventure are several faces he's never seen before.
Notes:
There was an issue of the way the group as a whole managed to interact with Golden Lucario which is clearly visible in the RP. We hope this doesn't impact too much on the overall feel to it.
Other:
Eric caught an east sea Shellos lv.6, Ariadan managed to catch a Bronzor lv.5 and Golden Lucario aquired a Treecko (level not mentioned) and left his Heracross in daycare.
I hope you'll have as fun reading it as we had making it.
Posted by: Master Houndoom Dec 11 2009, 03:11 PM
And... awaaaay we go!
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=16326&st=0 was a very exciting read. I like the characters, and they were interesting. It was a shame that Connie and Rosie disappeared at the end. It would have been interesting to see a diverse group get to know each other.
One thing: There was one battle, and it was well played, but it was at the very end, and involved only one player. So the rest of you will see low scores because of this.
And now, on with the scoring.
Pan Gibbs (click to showhide)
Pan is a very interesting character, and I absolutely adore Chichi. By far, you were the most active player, and your posts were all well thought out. There were some short posts, but they were not overly detrimental.
One thing, however, that was: There are places where your verb tenses are not the same as others. You put things in present tense and it jars the reader out of the story. For this, I had to dock on point. Also, your dialogue; It needs to be spaced like the rest of your paragraphs. As it is, you have double spacing in action paragraphs, and single spacing for dialogue, and that makes a reader's eyes tired. At least, this one. Since there wasn't a whole lot of dialogue, I let it be for now.
Battling: You were the only battle, and it was well written and involved all of your pokemon. However, it seemed to be included as an afterthought. I am only awarding 3 points.
Participation: 3/3
Skill: 4/5
Activity: 2/2
Battle: 3/5
Total: 12/15
Andrew "Demon" Simons (click to showhide)
You had the second most participation, lasting until the third to last post. As such, we don't know your fate, but we know a lot.
There were a lot of short posts that I felt could have been expanded on. Also there were some grave misspellings (the most consistant one was "warped" instead of "wrapped" concerning his bandages. As such, I have docked to levels from the skill category.
There was no battle, so there are no battle points.
Participation: 3/3
Skill: 3/5
Activity: 2/2
Battle: 0/5
Total: 8/15
Connie Carta (click to showhide)
Connie was interesting, and had a very nice outlook, but you dropped early. For this, I lowered your participation by one.
You write well, but you need to watch your capitalization. ALL proper names, characters, pokemon, and the like, must be capitalized. Your spacing is off, as well. Quotes in sentences should not have a space after the first or before the last, but will need to have a space before the first and after the last. Combined lowering of 2 skill points is required.
There was, unfortunately, no battle.
Participation: 2/3
Skill: 3/5
Activity: 2/2
Battle: 0/5
Total: 7/15
Rosie Evans (click to showhide)
Rosie was fun to read, but your activity was the lowest of the group. I docked a point for that, and a point for the early drop in participation.
Your posts were short consistently, and they could have been longer. However, there were no glaring errors. One point lowered.
No battle, I'm afraid.
Participation: 2/3
Activity: 1/2
Skill: 4/5
Battle: 0/5
Total: 7/15
I look forward to seeing all of these characters again, together or separately.
Posted by: 2gamers Jan 2 2010, 08:22 PM
I Did Not Forget: Review of “Daigake, the Town at the Edge”
Good first RP. I kept comments brief so I could get this review out. If you want elaboration on something, PM me.
Eric Dean Nogarius- Nogster (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3
Skill: 4/5
Good scenery description of Daigake in the first post. I also liked Eric’s reaction to the whismur. Your posts were of decent length, but it couldn’t hurt to be a little longer (though this was only a problem early on).
I think Eric’s injuries could have been RPed better. After falling 10 feet in the ocean and swimming an unknown distance with injured hips, knees, and elbows, I would think he’d like to lay down for a bit rather than
run to the pokecenter. Finally, I would have liked to seen more of “the eccentric prankster” described in Eric’s profile (maybe he was having an off-day :P). A good first effort though
.
Activity: 2/2
Battle: 4/5
It was a good battle vs. the Shellos. If there were a 1-2 wild pokemon battles thrown in, this would have gotten full marks. Also trainer battles are often more challenging to characters, which would also score full points (if done well of course).
Total: 13/15Nice first RP. Hope to see more of you in the future.
Mackenzie "Mack" Jonathan Ramsay- Spearow (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3
Skill: 4/5
Mack is in the unique position of being about ten years younger than his fellow teammates. In the future, I’d like to know how this affects Mack. It might make his character stand out more.
On the search for Eric, I liked how Mack thought of Eric drowning in the ocean. It showed some emotion and perhaps helplessness in the situation. Looking up to Frank for guidance on what to do was also a nice touch, perhaps revealing a bit of Mack’s role in this group.
Your posts were of good length and description. I can’t say much more on that.
Activity: 2/2
Battle: 0/5
Mack did not battle in this RP, so I can’t reward points.
Total: 9/15The only real fault here was the lack of battles. Obviously, if pokemon don’t, they don’t earn as many levels. The Rping itself is off to a good start though
.
Frank Joanes- Ariadan (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3
Skill: 4/5
I like how Frank’s appearance affected the others, Frank temporally oblivious to his mask and sword. It should prove for some humorous situation in future RPs.
I wanted to see more reaction from Frank on Eric’s disappearance. How did he feel? Did his back push the feelings on the backburner? Perhaps he was able to calm himself after seeing footprints on the beach. Stuff like this can show how Frank reacts during a potential crisis.
Overall, post content was good.
Activity:2 /2
Battle: 4/5
Good capture battle with Bronzor. Again, either more wild pokemon battles or trainer battles would have given more points.
Total:13/15
I hope to see more of this masked man soon enough.
Alex Slasher- Golden Lucario (click to showhide)
Participation: 1/3
You made a total of six posts in this RP, beginning after the halfway point. Combined with Alex not actually meeting the rest of the group, this resulted in a low participation score.
Skill: 2/5
Your first post seems to be a copy from your last RP with AwesomeVenusaur. To me, this felt lazy. Thus, I am ignoring this post for grading purposes.
Personally, I feel Alex’s story was rushed. He went from Lenolia to Daigake in a span of three posts. Keep in mind that Furoh is the size of Canada. I understand Alex had to get to the city to meet the others, but it’s a little far, considering Alex never did meet the other members of the RP. The same goes with meeting Tom. Both seemed to have become best friends within one paragraph. I think it would have been better if Alex met Tom in a different RP, one where there would be more time to develop their friendship.
Overall, Alex’s story never connected to the actual RP story. It blocked the flow, forcing the reader to concentrate on some event not immediately related to the RP itself. It felt like you were trying to do your own RP in someone else’s thread. Whether that was your intention or not, that’s how it came off.
Your posts could have used more detail. There was little emotion on Drew’s departure; I would have liked to know what Alex was contemplating.
Activity: 1/2
See participation.
Battle: 2/5
Vs. Carlos: I would have liked this one to last a couple posts, but more importantly, I would have liked more detail. It seemed like a back and forth fight: Pokemon A attacked with this, Pokemon B attacked with that. There was very little devoted to reaction.
Vs. Treecko: Definitely not quite the struggle I was hoping for. It was a simple back and forth attacking; no detail to how the pokemon took the hits. It was particularly short as well. This could have been handled better.
Total: 6/15
If you really wanted Alex to be in this RP, I would have had Alex enter Daigake on the first post, including a summary of events since the last RP. Tom would have been saved for a different RP, or met in Daigake. It probably would have been better to stay in Lenolia and create your own RP.
Posted by: Living Arrow Jan 16 2010, 06:14 AM
OK 2gamers or Doc. Sorry, but one of you has to cope with marking Team Rogue! I'm posting this now as it is *about* to finish but it will take a LONG time to read :p Enjoy!
Participants:
Master Houndoom: http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=3869
Padawan Umbrae Calamitas: http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=6401
Living Arrow: http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=4110
NPC: Meiko Omura
When their powers combine, they are TEAM ROGUE!
Plot: After leaving Arasam with a Badge and Ribbon under their belts, Team Rogue are led to a cave where a nest of Steelix had captured a Turtwig for their supper. Rescuing the Turtwig and escaping from the massive iron snakes, they reach the forest where they find a Squirtle and Buizel mid-battle, thanks to Tuesday's growing Aura powers. The Squirtle is clearly stronger, pwning the ass of the Buizel in front of them all. Deciding that the Squirtle has natural Contest abilities, Darryn decides to capture it and battles with Lady to secure the Tiny Turtle's fate.
The team travels for a couple of days with questions hanging in the air: What is Tuesday becoming? What use does Darryn's growing power have? Will Jaima and Meiko sleep in the same tent? Along the way, Mercury leads a team of strong-minded Pokemon to bring Zorro out of his state of depression.
Then, after a night of scouting, Lady alerts Darryn that something isn't right in the forest. With nothing to solidify her fears, they all sleep but a lot goes on while the trainers are mid-slumber. Tuesday leaves camp, drawn by the Aura of her Riolu who has fallen foul of an attack by several nasty Pokemon. The other trainers are woken to find the camp under attack! Not only that, but Tuesday is missing! Identifying their attackers as Team Deception, Jaima, Darryn and Meiko battle fiercely against Pokemon that are more powerful than any of their own and don't have a problem with hurting humans.
Battered and tired, the team make their way to Tuesday's Uncle's house where they intend to recoup before moving on to Petropolis.
Key points:
Tuesday's Aura powers develop
Tuesday begins martial arts training with Jaima and Shadow
Darryn prepares for his next Contest
Darryn captures a Squirtle - Victor
Tuesday captures a Buizel - Odysseus
Meiko captures a Turtwig - Cosette
Darryn's Cranidos - Zulu - evolves
Darryn's Ponyta - November - learns the attack Morning Sun
Tuesday's Houndour - Ashleigh - evolves
Team Deception's Gardevoir - Squit - Is introduced
A piece of Meiko's past is revealed
Posted by: 2gamers Jan 17 2010, 11:11 PM
Someone Put a Leash on that Girl! Review of “Team Rouge!”
These posts are huge! Luckily, I read them ahead of time, and with the lack of RPing going on, this went quickly. If you want more commentary on something, hit the PM box, though judging by your scores, you should be pretty happy.
That being said, I found a big giant plothole that may affect this RP as well as your current one. According to the wiki, http://pane.wikia.com/wiki/Tuesday_Ilia_Berdison#Marcus_DeBrody lives in Fidona. According to this RP, he lives somewhere between Arasam and Petropolis. Unless I missed something, someone’s losing a point.
Without further ado…
Darryn Kellor- Living Arrow (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3
Skill: 5/5
Darryn seems to have a hard time finding his place in Team Rogue. This seems to be exasperated by the discovery of his new ability (along with keeping the ability a secret from the others). He doesn’t show it yet, but Lady seems to hint at his feelings (as does Tuesday). I may have no idea what I’m talking about, but that’s how the posts felt to me.
I like your references to past friends like Mindy. Maybe some more elaboration on such relationships for those of us too lazy to read past RPs :P.
I love to hate Lady. Sure she’s loyal, but she’s quite the…um…witch
. Her interactions with others were well done.
Activity: 2/2
Battle: 4/5
Vs. squirtle: Very creative use of moves, though I’m a little wary of using flamethrower to evaporate a water attack. I might be able to see it for a weak move like bubble, but certainly not a water pulse attack from an equally leveled opponent.
Vs. Team Deception pokemon: No doubt that this wasn’t a walk in the park battle. That goes for everyone in this RP. Love the combos (Lady/Mercury comes to mind)
Total: 14/15Did I mention his biting sarcasm? Well, I like that too
.
Jaima Kuonji- Master Houndoom (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3
Skill: 5/5
Poor, poor Jaima. He just couldn’t catch a break in this RP. First, he has to deal with Tuesday’s gift and her tendency to wander off everywhere (usually right into trouble). He tries to get a good night’s rest, but Team Deception ruins that. Finally, just as he’s about to be rewarded for all the crud he dealt with, Meiko smacks him in the face and leaves their whole relationship in doubt. Not a good day for the top contender.
You successfully showed that not everyone gets a happy ending in every RP. That’s probably something we should all remember from time to time.
Activity: 2/2
Battle: 5/5
Vs. Team Deception: Like LA, you also had several good battles. There was a lot more of Meiko's pokemon getting in on the action. Careful on balancing this with Jaima, as Jaima is the one getting the levels.
Total: 15/15
I love his struggles with being the leader. Let’s hope he turns things around in the next RP (judging from CV, he does).
Tuesday Berdison- P.U.C. (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3
Skill: 4/5
I like how as soon as Tuesday turned thirteen, all hell broke loose in her life. She started getting crazy powers and causing Jaima all sorts of grief. The hormones haven’t even kicked in yet! Seriously, I like her journey to understand herself; it works in this setting.
I was a little afraid that Zorro was transforming into some emo personality, so I’m glad that the condition was pokemon induced.
It appears you introduced DeBrody’s house, so you’re gonna take the fall for this one. Next time, edit the Wiki BEFORE I go grade your RP :P.
Activity:2 /2
Battle: 5/5
Ashleigh vs. Weavile was one of the best battles in this RP. Well done.
Total: 14/15I look forward to Tuesday meeting Pan in CV
.
Posted by: Living Arrow Feb 3 2010, 11:47 AM
S.S. Lynette, Now Departing!
A pretty standard RP. Trainers meet, battle and move on. Next time, try to plan more together in a pm so you don’t string battles out over so many posts. On the whole, you all did an average job – see below for personal grades.
Douken Sota - Douken (click to showhide)
Nice opening. Re-read your posts to make sure you’ve got the right grammar and surprise words haven’t appeared. As a relatively active member, please update your profile with learned attacks for each of your Pokemon – if in doubt, see how I’ve done it on Darryn’s profile. In case you weren’t sure, your Croagunk’s father is definitely a Hitmonchan, so his egg moves can only come from that line.
Participation – 2/3
Skill – 4/7
Battling – 2/5
Total: 8/15
EpicLunatic - Kaylee - Dead Character (click to showhide)
Very good for a second language – my only real criticism is your tenses. E.g. “do” and “did”. Please read Douken’s comments for tips on battling with another player.
Participation – 2/3
Skill – 4/7
Battling – 2/5
Total: 8/15
Euphraim - Sora (click to showhide)
Firstly, sorry to hear about your classmate – the same thing has happened to me in recent years. You have my sympathetic ear if you need it. On a roleplay note: Very nice dialogue from you – keep it up. Careful of your spelling though.
Participation – 2/3
Skill – 6/7
Battling – 0/5
Total: 8/15
Xal - Malcolm (click to showhide)
Don’t be afraid to throw yourself at the other characters – you’re introduction needn’t have been so slow. That said, you wrote it well.
Participation – 3/3
Skill – 5/7
Battling – 2/5
Total: 10/15
Fleeting Eternity – Shiori – Dead Character (click to showhide)
Very nice intro. Shame you haven’t been online in some time.
Participation – 2/3
Skill – 6/7
Battling – 0/5
Total: 8/15
Berry314 – Lizzie (click to showhide)
Posts were a little short. Work on your flow of dialogue and don’t slip into posts with only a couple of sentences.
Participation – 3/3
Skill – 3/7
Battling – 2/5
Total: 8/15
Posted by: Xal Feb 12 2010, 10:18 AM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=26424&st=0&start=0 has come to an end due to inactivity.
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=17136&hl= (Dragon Maiden)
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=21623 (...Douken Sota)
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=26037 (KamonPeachFox)
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=22026 (Xal)
Aussie Winters was arrested on suspicion of stealing her Ponyta, Sandman. Although she found the Ponyta wild and it was severely neglected and in a bad way, it had been stolen from somebody else. Douken went along with her to the station, where he helped control (and then befriend and be given) a young Growlithe. Aussie's auntie then went to the station, who Aussie explained the story to.
Meanwhile, Kamon's Mudkip took some sushi from a stall leading to a chase by the stall owner as well as a few other people. Malcolm heard the commotion and tried to help catch the thief, hoping to make up for Pichu's own thievery. Instead he found himself in a fight with a young obnoxious trainer called Timothy. A battle followed, but it was interrupted by a man named Govannon. Everyone went their separate ways except Malcolm and Govannon, since Govannon discovered Malcolm was the student his teacher cousin gave Pichu to.
However, Kamon and Dragon Maiden became inactive mid RP. DM hasn't been online since January 14th, and although I can't see when Kamon was last online the last contact I had with her was December 19th. Without Kamon it was difficult for me to carry on (and I probably shouldn't have waited so long, it seemed to make the RP quite sluggish so I guess I'm at least partially responsible for the later inactivity) and without DM carrying on is just impossible, since the RP revolves around her character. We were intending for the four characters to meet up later on in the RP, as well as finding out who really stole Sandman (if anyone's interested, we were considering it being a relative of Timothy's). Douken and I, the only remaining members, agreed it was time to end it.
Posted by: Master Houndoom Feb 24 2010, 05:55 PM
QUOTE
No matter what, everyone gets 2 levels, distributed between their Pokemon according to use, as long as they finish an RP. Of course, if they drop out, depending on where, they lose so many of these "free" levels. We need the free ones so that our new, inexperienced RPers still have incentive to RP and improve. An additional level is added for keeping a good amount of activity, for a total of 3 levels.
Next, we have 7 levels that are based on the skill of the RPer. So, these are based on quality of post. They're also divided up between the two Pokemon based on use. This means that our better RPers get more levels, which the should rightfully have.
Finally, 5 levels are awarded based on actual battling. So, basically, how much a Pokemon battles, and how well written the battles are. This is separate from quality of post. If someone battles with a Pokemon even once, they get 1 of these levels. The rest should be mod discretion.
So, this totals up to a possible 15 levels for an RPer. Only 10 can be awarded to one Pokemon though, giving incentive for RPers to catch more Pokemon to add to their teams.
Overall, this post was a bit confusing, likely owing to the split in perspective (two different groups who were, had things gone well, meant to meet up). Another thing that confused me was the location. Aussie started near Moo Moo Land, established in another unfinished RP to be far enough away from Barley to require a helicopter trip. Somehow, she is pulled to Barley, causing enough commotion to gain the attention of someone who just landed. This is jarring to the reader.
Dragon Maiden (click to showhide)
Aussie continues to be an interesting character. She is not the standard know it all, she is not an excited pre-teen looking for adventure, she is an awkward pre-teen semi-outcast looking for life experiences, as encouraged by her aunt. I think she is played very well here, and hope you are able to continue later.
The one complaint I have is with the characterization of Jenny. At times, she seems compassionate, at others hard nosed. It is important that a background or foil character remain consistant. If the character is compassionate, she may not use phrases like "potentially dangerous criminal" more than once. If she is hard nosed about the law, truly believing Aussie had done wrong, she would have been stern throughout, and would never invite a civilian along. In contrast to Aussie's aunt, she possibly should have been. The overly parental warning was a nice touch, but ended up being one more character facet that doesn't quite fit.
SCORING:
Participation: 2/3 You were there for a lot of the RP, and it was ended before your absence was terribly missed.
Skill: 5/7 Overall, Aussie is interesting and engaging. Her tendency to ramble is confusing, but well within character. The characterizations of some NPCs was inconsistent, and that hurt your score here.
Battle: 0/5 You did not participate in a battle.
Overall: 7/15 (should you return)
Douken Sota (click to showhide)
There's not much to say about Douken, mainly because your posts were rather short. There is also some minor instances of god moding (He knows the recipe that the police feed their animals, he was the only person in a roomful of trained pokemon police to be able, or even attempt, to battle an unruly growlithe. He was also the only person the growlithe would listen to. Overall, that husts your score a bit.
SCORING:
Participation: 3/3 You were there until the end, and consistent, and despite my criticisms, you were true to the character.
Skill: 3/7 I struggled with the scoring on this, but the length of the posts, consistently short, drove the score down further. While Aussie, by definition, is introverted and more prone to exposition and flashbacks, having Douken describe how he feels and what's going on around him is not a bad thing. Also, the aforementioned... god moding (which, I want to reiterate, was very mild in comparison to things I usually define as God Moding.)
Battle: 3/5 The battle was played well, but a little short. I gave you a bonus for keeping the battle to moves a lower level seel would know.
Overall: 9/15
KamonPeachFox (click to showhide)
It's a shame to see you go. The posts were descriptive, the character well played, even the enemy NPC was in character and consistent. Hopefully, you'll be back, but in the mean time, I have to score what I'm given, not what I think could have been.
SCORING:
Participation: 1/3. You left the earliest, and left Malcolm hanging.
Skill: 5/7 A high score, only lowered because she disappeared, and because there were some issues with her actions (sending a mudkip to look for sushi... even if there wasn't a misunderstanding, there could have been a misunderstanding.)
Battle: 0/5 You played the NPC, but did not battle yourself, and since it is your pokemon getting the experience, I have to report no levels for this
Overall: 6/15
Xal (click to showhide)
You came in late, but the way you played the character was well done. I took a little off for some problems I had, which I will explain.
SCORING:
Participation: 3/3 You were there, consistant, and even posted the last post.
Skill: 4/7 There were some details you missed (you claimed, at one point, that Timothy didn't give his name, which he did a few posts earlier. I know you meant his age, but it was a bit of a mistake.) The posts were well written, but the sudden deus ex machina of Govannon dropped the score harshly. Double Posting in an RP where there are still two active participants is not acceptable.
Battle: 2/5 I credited you for the battle, however, I was reluctant to do that, since it was written out by KPF. In the future, and this may have been the intent, one of you should post half the battle, and the other another half, to reflect that the battle has two participants. In this case, you should have posted the battle, since her NPC was the other participant.
Overall: 9/15
As always, if there are any comments, please direct them to my PM box.
Posted by: Alex Slasher Mar 3 2010, 05:56 AM
Ok! Finally, we've finsihed.
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=26520
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=18464 - Me (I WAS Golden Lucario, but I changed my name.)
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=26159 - Protoman
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=17616 - rt117
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=27198 - Kranic
In Sailors and a Golden, Alex Slasher continues his journey. Setting off from Diagake, he travels west along the north coast, hoping to get into the town of Jillius and eventually Barley. Just before he gets into Jillius, he meets Tyson, a new trainer starting out his journey, and Tikal, a cheerful but shy girl. As they are about to move on, a flock of Wingulls attacks them. They fight these off and get into Jillius.
In Jillius, they go to the beach for a little while, as a way or release for Alex. There he meets Ellis Mackrel (Cheesy name, I know) who is very upset and tells him that some nasty men took away his Golden Magikarp, Golde. Alex is telling Ellis he thinks they are team Deception, and as he does so a rude boy named Castor butts into the conversation. Reluctantly, Alex agrees to let Castor follow him and his new friends. Tikal soon comes back with a new Pokemon, and Tyson follows soon as well. They all get together and Alex tells them the plan, to go to the island near to where Golde was kidnapped.
On this Island, Alex chooses to split into teams. He and Ellis head together straight through the forest. Just beforehand, Castor throws a jibe about Alex and Ellis being gay. Alex, a homophobic person, takes this badly. Amazingly, Ellis does not even know the slightest meaning of the word gay, so Alex has to Explain. They keep searching, and Alex comes across a Shinx who he captures. Proud of his capture, Alex turns to Ellis. Ellis, not listening, announces that he thinks he may be gay. Alex runs off, terrified.
Meanwhile, Tyson is missing out on a golden opportunity to ask Tikal out, who he has grown to like. However, he doesn't, mainly because he is a little shy. Soon, they come across the hut, and phone Alex, who has just found out from Ellis that he actually likes Castor, which makes Alex lighten up a lot. He and Ellis rush over to the hut almost immediately, calling Castor as they do so, who in the meantime has caught a Marill.
They get there to find the others missing. They get worried so try to enter the building. They find Tikal and Tyson fighting some grunts. They have a three people battle, with the Admin fighting one person with each Pokemon. Once the win, they go off separate ways to free Pokemon or to be a distraction team. After a while, they succeed, but the building is burning down, so they escape.
Afterwards, the meet eachother again, having been separated, and head back to the mainland.
Pokemon caught in the RP:
Igglybuff- Tikal Faylen
Shinx (named Leo)- Alex Slasher
Marill (named Azure)- Castor Garnet
Posted by: Living Arrow Mar 3 2010, 02:51 PM
Sailors and a Golden Magikarp
Alex Slasher - Alex Slasher
Tyson Parker - Protoman
Tikal Faylen - rt117
Caster Garnet - Kranic
Again, I’m seeing the massively long battle style that a lot of players are using. Please work together in pms to post larger chunks of battle. Even so, you managed it without making me angry (thanks to the edits later on) with 1 sentence posts so I’m not docking points for it.
HOWEVER! This is a solid notification for all players involved – please please please spend a little more time to up the quality and length of individual posts – we’d rather see fewer, well written posts than lots of mini-posts that look like you posted between watching youtube videos.
In all, all players should be proud of their scores but I will highlight your target areas in
BOLD to improve for next time.
Alex Slasher (click to showhide)
You had the most Pokemon and yet managed to handle all of their different personalities pretty well. Be careful when running multiple viewpoints in a single post – if you have them too short, they can be confusing. Try to flesh them out a little and spaced them out a bit more - it will make them easier to read. Charge Beam is too powerful for a Shinx of that level – please downgrade to Thundershock until around level 24. Leo could suffer a bit of amnesia until then :p Oh, and that was the worst out-of-the-closet moment ever for Ellis. Wow! A homophobe in Furoh! Looks like Darryn shall be heading north soon ^^; . You handled being leader ok so your skill is up a bit than what I would have given you.
3 levels activity
4 levels skill
4 levels battling
Total: 11/15
Protoman (click to showhide)
I like your development of your character’s Pokemon especially Hydro. However, I’m a little concerned that a young Squirtle like that knows Skull Bash already. Did you get permission for it? Since it is naturally learned in the early 30s I’m loathe to allow this… please make it a Tackle attack until at least level 25. Poor Tyson! The pain must be awful but a clairvoyant in PANE shall be interesting! Watch out for short posts – they make me dock skill points… like… *so*.
3 levels activity
3 levels skill
4 levels battling
Total: 10/15
rt117 (click to showhide)
Watch out for particularly short posts but otherwise I liked reading Tikal’s posts. Tikal’s Nidoran had a BUSY DAY! Man, that toxic rabbit is going to sleep well tonight! Seriously, though, make it believable. That poor thing was completely overworked by the end of the RP – Tikal’s Charmander could have picked up the slack, especially after the Rattata battle.
3 levels activity
3 levels skill
4 levels battling
Total: 10/15
Kranic (click to showhide)
To be honest, I felt bad for you joining and then being separated from the main group within a few posts. Never fear, your posting was very well written. Convincing battle with the Deception Grunt won me over so your skill level and battle points reflects this. I am always pleased to find a character who has a chip on their shoulder – Castor rocks. Where did you go!? Since you entered late and left early, your grade sadly represents this.
2 levels activity
6 levels skill
3 levels battling (the Rhyhorn battle was the best in the RP so this score did not suffer too badly from the lack of battlgin compared to the others)
Total: 11/15
Posted by: Puck Apr 2 2010, 10:14 PM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=29302&st=0 has come to an end, so now we're forcing you to grade it!
Begin: January 17th
Ended: April 2nd
Post Count: 46
Characters
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=4110 - Living Arrow
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=3869 - Master Houndoom
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=6401 - Umbrae Calamitas
Meiko Omura
Team Rogue awakens in the home of Marcus DeBrody, Tuesday's uncle, where they spent the night after arriving in separate groups. It is here that they also meet Tuesday's two siblings for the first time - the harsh and judgmental Anika, who bears a prejudice against fire-types and has no faith in her sister; Brone, the kind-hearted and mysterious psychic, who bears immense powers but lacks the sense of sight.
Initially, the group tries to rest, but each are plagued by different pains. With Zorro hooked up to fluids and medicals equipment in the laboratory, Tuesday fears that he will not survive the attack that brought him down. A painful past relationship has Meiko doubting Jaima and herself, and Jaima bears the burden of this as well as playing protective older brother to Tuesday. Darryn is dealing with retaining the loaded secret that is his psychic powers, and struggling with the mysterious boy that is Brone, who could easily reveal such information if he so chose.
As time goes on, with the team resting and regaining their strength, they learn more about Tuesday's family and about their pokemon. Eventually, they challenge each other to a series of battles, in which they are tested and a lot of fun is had. Darryn loses his battle with DeBrody - a far more experienced battler - but proves himself immensely in a strong battle against Brone's girafarig, Hidalgo.
Tuesday faces Jaima in a match filled with adversity, when Dante, still adamant in that Jaima is a horrible person and should never have burdened Tuesday's existence, battles Ember, who finds the fire of battle that she has been searching for. After Odysseus battles Tsunami, a battle that Tuesday was unprepared for - having somehow forgotten about the fact that Odysseus was a water-type - they all retire inside for hot chocolate, prepared to leave the next morning, when they receive an addition to the team.
Posted by: 2gamers Apr 17 2010, 09:04 PM
Tiebreaker! Review of “Breaking the Ties That Bind”
Despite being an RP about downtime between Team Deception attacks and gym/contest, there was plenty of content to make a great story. There was a lot going on here; it seems like when there are no huge events going on, Team Rouge unleashes whatever emotional baggage they have :P. With all the foreshadowing going on, I suspect they’ll have new problems soon enough.
My only major gripe would have to be the overkill on telepathy users. The preexisting psychics, I could understand, but Mr. Postman’s ability seemed tacked on just so he could have a connection to the psychic network. Despite everything else that’s going on, I’m still left wondering why Victor and Odysseus were fighting in the last RP (to the point where the buizel ended up with a broken tail). Maybe I missed it somewhere down the line, but you’d think it would come up.
Anywho…
Master Houndoom- Jaima Kuonji and Meiko Omura (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
Skill: 7/7
Like in Uprising, it isn’t all peaches n’ cream for Jaima and Meiko. We get a little more detail on Meiko’s and Mercury’s past, which is always good. It appears Jaima tries to push his problems aside by getting into Tuesday’s business. Eventually, things work out though.
It would have been nice to hear what Meiko thought of her battle skills after her battle with Brone.
Battle: 5/5
Ember vs. Dante: This was a good way for the quilava to find her spark for battling. It was handled very well.
Total: 15/15
Living Arrow- Darryn Kellor (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
Skill: 7/7
It seems Darryn was left out of the whole major life issue parade. You could argue that his “Emota-glow” power was an issue, but not compared to the people he was keeping company with. This wasn’t a bad thing; it’d have been weird if everyone’s issues erupted at the same time. Perhaps that was Darryn’s plan all long; he wants the attention all to himself :P.
For some reason, I really liked Lady’s sarcastic jabs at Brone. His interactions with Meiko were great. Darryn was the stable one for this RP.
Battle: 5/5
The Bravo/Warhawk battle was the best of the bunch. The pidgeotto put on quite a show, even if he did lose.
Total: 15/15
Whatever the hell your name is now- Tuesday Berdinson (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
Skill: 7/7
This was a very Tuesday-centric RP. We met a bunch of her family members at a time when a third of her pokemon team are in all sorts of trouble. Tuesday is working on getting over her fear of water, a good sign of growing older. We also were introduced to the psychic network, an easier way for guest appearances or even events across Furoh.
Brone was likely my favorite character. He’s very enigmatic, yet fallible enough to be considered real. I’d much rather have him become Tuesday’s partner than Reilly, but that’s just me.
Battle: 5/5
Dante’s battle revealed a good bit more about his character, so this one was the best of Tuesday’s bunch. It was interesting to see him botch a match just to get at Jaima. Bonus points to Debrody’s sage advice to Darryn.
Total: 15/15
Posted by: Master Houndoom May 3 2010, 04:12 PM
SPECIAL RP GRADE: CASTLE VONMOTO: TEAM KUONJI
Team Kuonji has come to an end, and everyone who participated to the end had a lot of talent and, hopefully, a lot of fun showcasing it. Those who did not manage to stay to the end also had talent, and also hopefully had fun; Of this I have no doubt. Time constraints can be brutal, and we all know what that's like.
I am going to grade this a little differently than I grade posts usually, due to those horrible time constraints (I'm going on a business trip tomorrow through Friday, and need to get ready), but also due to the special, long, and mixed nature of the RP.
Xal: 10/10 (click to showhide)
Initial Post: You made a good job of introducing your character to the audience. The process of picking out a suitable outfit from a wardrobe of identical clothing was cute and funny, and a good nod to the anime and games, only one two (series) of which show the character changing clothing at all. You also showed a good look at the personalities of Malcolm's pokemon.
After the Split: You reacted to circumstances very well. It would have been nice to have them driven a little bit by you to add a little variety, but I also understand that that was something of a daunting task: I know I did little to drive the plot with my Partner character in another section. Over all, you did a good job of keeping up and putting your own spin on the situation, and, as I remember, after the re-shuffle, you drove things a little more.
The End: This comment will be the same for everyone: It was nice to see that no one was super powered enough to make it out of the avalanche on their own,and that everyone needed Ho-oh's help. It made the potential for the disaster and the miracle of the salvation that much more poignant.
Amissa: 10/10 (click to showhide)
Initial Post: You were very descriptive of your pokemon, showing a good hint to their personalities. Geb seems to be hard to really get a fix on, but Hercules as a crowd-shy machop is an interesting look. You did a good job establishing where your character was throughout, giving a feel of dimension in the room, and were the first to start the convention of directing the focus of the post by naming names at the top; as more people came into the RP, this became useful.
After the Split: It was nice to see you add your own touches and observations to the individual rooms, and also a good thing that Daniel was not a strict follower, but had his own thoughts on the situations; such details make roleplay more believable. I especially liked the pichu boat ideas. You interacted and reacted well to the situations as given, but I would have liked to have seen a little more innovation in the beginning; This is basically the same comment I gave to Xal.
The End: This comment will be the same for everyone: It was nice to see that no one was super powered enough to make it out of the avalanche on their own,and that everyone needed Ho-oh's help. It made the potential for the disaster and the miracle of the salvation that much more poignant.
Douken Sota: 10/10 (click to showhide)
Initial Post: Your post was short, but still had a good grasp of the character. I was glad to see someone who took other climates into account, since people are coming in from all over. The only thing I would ask you watch out for is dialogue: Each time a new person speaks, it should start a new paragraph.
After the Split: Your interaction with not just people but pokemon was admirable: I love that you acknowledged more than just your character and had Douken speak to another person's pokemon first; I have a soft spot for alert, kind trainers
You took the lead well on the berry making project, and it was a shame that we didn't get to see that through. It was also good how you reacted to potentially negative circumstances without complaint; you managed to make the inexperience of the character become real while showing his massive potential for improvement; lesser RPers would have whined about their pokemon getting whammied like it did, but you played it realistically. Again, I must comment, but this is for everyone, including myself: It's not wrong to make the RPs more detailed; but it's not always wrong to make them short, too.
The End: This comment will be the same for everyone: It was nice to see that no one was super powered enough to make it out of the avalanche on their own,and that everyone needed Ho-oh's help. It made the potential for the disaster and the miracle of the salvation that much more poignant.
And last, but not least, I get to grade one of the people who was not in my group. Mods split grading of each other amoung themselves, and I was lucky enough to get Living Arrow.
Living Arrow: 10/10 (click to showhide)
It was great to see Darryn interact with new people, both those he had a history with and those he didn't. He has this alternately snarky yet kind side, and it was great to see when Darryn had compassion or took the lead, as well as to see Reilly drive him to the farthest extreme of snark. I am, admittedly, biased for your work, however, it was good to see Darryn in a new light. The revelation of the deep friendship between Pan and Darryn was well played out by both characters. Good show!
Everyone did a fantastic job, and I look forward to another event like this, so our characters can meet and compare notes.
Posted by: 2gamers May 3 2010, 07:38 PM
Continuing with the Vonmoto RP grading...
Master Houndoom- Jaima Kuonji and Meiko Omura (click to showhide)
Grading by 2gamers
Participation/Activity: 3/3
Skill: 7/7
I really liked the delibird scene where the messenger had to keep coming back into the pokemon center to deliver letters. Very funny.
I was looking forward to this RP for several reasons, one of which was to see how characters interacted with other characters they would not normally encounter. It was a little bit of a slow start in the main thread (to be fair, everyone was getting used to RPing with so many people), but Jaima and Meiko truly shined in the team threads. Jaima became the reluctant leader in his thread, trying to pass on the role to someone else. He was probably sick of having such responsibility in Team Rouge and wanted a break. I liked how he was so suspicious of everyone being part of a Team Deception plot. It really shows how past RPs have affected him.
As for Meiko, I like her tough girl damsel in distress be damned attitude. She complemented Pan in getting stuff done. Love her reaction to Pans and Darryns past. Her surfing skills on the slide were also a nice touch.
I really enjoyed the teamwork aspect of the Ursaring battle; it goes back to Lonnies speech about working together. I wish Meiko and Pan would have done something similar, though Im partly to blame for rushing the scene.
Im curious though: Why couldnt Mercury teleport both the humans out of the snow? It would have been interesting to see them helplessly attempt to get others out of the snow. That being said, it was nice to see what they would do in their last moments.
The only fault I could find would be a few short posts, but even then, the overall quality outweighed the outliers.
Best part:
QUOTE
KRUMPF!
"No," he whispered, then raised his hands, curled like claws, to the ceiling. "No! NO! CURSE YOU, MOUNT CARELLO!"
Jaima picked himself up off the floor, dusted off his pants, and looked around. "What is it," he asked distractedly, taking stock of the room and his companions.
"Ze soufflé! She ees ruined!"
Jaima, Mercury, Ember, and even some of the food preparers turned to him and blinked. Shaking his head, he looked around, bending over and helping a fallen young man who was the kitchen's gofer. "I think we have other things to worry about. Such as what the hell that was."
Total: 10/10
Posted by: Douken Sota May 16 2010, 01:30 PM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=32741 has just come to a close. During this nightly adventure, a group of young trainers, http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=21623, http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=22026 with his mentor, Govannon, and http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=27198 each encountered each other in the mist of the woods, some going to see what nightly Pokemon lurk in the dark shadows, others were completely lost. Sure, there was also http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=32593&view=findpost&p=878390, but he didn't find anyone and good chance got lost in the woods completely.
The first two to meet were Douken and Malcolm, who remembered each other from their mountain adventure, followed up my Castor, who immediately seemed eager for a battle. Unknown about everyone's combat skills, Douken thought of a way to try and place everyone on even grounds: battle with newly caught Pokemon. Each person parted their own ways to see what they could find. Douken got himself a Duskull after battling with Growlithe, Castor got a Schroomish after battling with Marrill, and Malcolm got a Togepi by saving it from a swarm of Golbat.
With everyone having a new partner in hand, they got ready to have a battle in a one on one on one style, but Govannon had other ideas, having to pull Malcolm away from the battle, leaving Duskull VS Schrromish. Duskull lost by forfeit since Douken was concerned about Pain Split, a unique move for Duskull that she didn't have down completely, not performing at its best. Annoyed at the result though his Marrill and Schroomish were excited about the win, Castor walked away from the battle ground, leaving Douken alone, who just camped there for the night.
Important Notes:
Douken caught Duskull
Malcolm Caught Togepi
Castor Caught Schroomish
Douken and Castor had a battle. Castor won.
OOC Notes:
Reino posted once, but didn't post in two weeks, so we decided to drop him from the RP. If he would of came back, he would of dropped in around the middle of the battle or them about to get into one, which would be late in the RP.
Xal had to leave the RP for what I would call an OOC reason. I had no problem with him leaving because of it.
Posted by: 2gamers May 18 2010, 01:01 PM
Review of “Nocturnal Hunt”
Sometimes, it’s good to have a nice simple get-together rather than an epic adventure every single RP. Though a bit shorter than most RPs, “Nocturnal Hunt” managed to fit nicely; I can’t think of anything to add.
Note that since Marquis only posted once, no points were awarded for that character.
Doukan Sota- Doukan Sota (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
Skill: 6/7
Doukan displayed some leadership qualities in this RP. That may be because he was controlled by the RP creator, but let’s assume that’s a general quality. One example would be when Doukan sets up the match between him, Malcolm, and Castor. Just because an older person was around didn’t mean Doukan surrendered leadership to him.
On the downside, post length was variable for many posts. These shorter posts tended to be replies to others; perhaps more on his feelings would have added more content. The last post could’ve involved a reflection on the evening’s events, perhaps a brief glimpse into what lied ahead. Finally, I would have liked to see more acknowledgement of Doukan’s other meetings with Malcolm, considering both have shared every RP they’ve been in.
Battle: 5/5
Doukan’s battle with the duskull was good. It wasn’t a blow out considering the growlithe’s level, so things were reasonably accurate.
Both Doukan and Castor brought out their competitive sides for this match. Each explained effects of the attacks to the other, though this came off as a bit arrogant. The end showed the contrasting styles: Doukan withdraws after being concerned with his pokemon’s condition, while Castor believes in an all-or-nothing approach.
Total: 14/15
Castor Garnet- Kranic (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
Skill: 7/7
His hotheadedness was quite evident in this RP. In addition, he seems to be quite the loner. He came looking for a battle; once that was over, he was gone. One wonders if he desires companionship of other people and this is all a ploy to look tough :P.
Like Doukan, you also had a few short posts, though not as much. I would have liked a more satisfying last post from Castor (see Douken’s grade for details) and perhaps more insight into what’s going on in Castor’s head.
Battle: 4/5
In the shroomish battle, we get some of the thought processes of Kaize. My one gripe with this was that Castor healed the still wild shroomish after the battle, but paid no attention to the paralyzed, beat-up marill. I also would have like to see a bit more of a struggle for marill to move around and attack; paralysis tends to make those things difficult.
See Doukan’s battle grade for comments on that battle.
Total: 14/15
Malcolm Smith- Xal (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 2/3
You left before the big battle, which was pretty much the whole purpose of the story.
Skill: 7/7
I liked Malcolm’s curiosity about eggs and baby pokemon, as well as Govannon’s general dislike for hanging around kids. Also liked the Castle Vonmoto references; I hope Malcolm tries to keep in touch with Doukan. It would’ve been nice to acknowledge their other meetings; Malcolm and Doukan have shared every RP they’ve been in.
Battle: 2/5
Malcolm’s only battle was with an unknown number of zubats and a golbat. It wasn’t much of a battle, and thunder shock and wave were able to hit multiple targets, something they’re not supposed to do.
Total: 11/15
Posted by: 2gamers May 30 2010, 10:44 PM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=30426 is complete! Starring:
2gamers- http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=10334
Yzarc Drowsnam- http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=10528
Moonlight Zelda- http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=30303&st=0&p=804022&#entry804022
Tysm- http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=15236
With special appearance by Living Arrow- Darryn Kellor
In 4U, Pan and co. journeyed through Furoh’s underground network in search of buried treasure. They started their adventure in the underground town of Under Hill. From there, they dug through the walls to find a bounty of treasures. In addition, Pan caught a cleffa and an absol joined Andrew’s party.
Tensions rose as Justin and Pan argued over sharing treasure. Tensions from that argument vanished once the team discovered an ancient temple dedicated to the legendary Groudon. They found that this temple was being raided by construction team, whose leader tried to eliminate Pan and Justin with a drilling mech. The good guys came out the winners, not knowing that the plot ran far deeper than their encounter.
The RP ended with Pan eying her next mission and Justin facing an uncertain future towards a life in crime. Who knows where this will take them.
This is the first RP I completed without having to write up a giant summary to tie up loose ends. Unfortunately, Moonlight suffered from health issues and other real life issues that didn’t allow her to keep posting. I nearly forgot Tysm was even in the RP :P.
Mod note: I believe Living Arrow reserved this RP for grading. I could be wrong though.
Posted by: Living Arrow May 31 2010, 03:43 AM
Review of “http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=30426” (ugh, writing that out is a chore!)
One of the first RPs I’ve graded in a while and although I loved parts of it, I was a little disappointed in others. It was clear from the start that activity was going to become an issue and so grades have suffered as a result for certain players. That said, the RP as a whole fit nicely and it was good to see the Furoh Underground being used and Team Deception truly being used properly. That said, read on for character specifics:
Pan – 2gamers (click to showhide)
From start to finish, the most active – full points there.
I’m very pleased to see that Pan has not lost sight of her ambitions and goals. Too often people make good profiles and end up making their roleplay generic – not so with Pan! I’m loving her development as an archaeologist and her Pokemon interactions are consistent. Having reminders of CV kept everything in perspective and allowed other players to get a taste of her experiences without bogging them down with info. Nice use of Zulu and having
me as a cameo was utterly sublime.
The Zubat battle was short but the mech-battle made up for it. There was, however, a distinct lack of Pokemon-a-Pokemon battle against other trainers that always claims a point in my grading – another level of interaction that gives a perfect score. Even so, a 14 was well-earned in this RP.
Participation: 3/3
Skill: 7/7
Battling: 4/5
Total: 14/15Justin – Yzarc Drowsnam (click to showhide)
Part 1, see Pan.
Having a proper adult in the mix was exciting, unexpected and although I had some initial worries, didn’t disappoint. Justin didn’t have the picture-perfect relationship with his Pokemon that most people opt for and having that degree of separation from them made his character more believable. His character was always kept in check and I never started thinking he was fitting in with the kids properly so it seemed like effort was definitely put into having his character seem like an outsider. Even so, he came through from beginning to end and the score reflects that.
Part 3, see Pan.
Participation: 3/3
Skill: 7/7
Battling: 4/5
Total: 14/15
Diana – Moonlight Zelda (click to showhide)
I have been gunning to see Diana in action for a while now (have been a fan since the profile went up) but was gutted to find that activity was so low. Sadly for your score, life does come first.
Despite not having many posts, Diana did have some character development and it was nice to see her mothering of Lin. Your interactions with other players were fair and I wasn’t left with an empty feeling of “Yeah, what next?”. My main gripe, however, was the lack of drive behind posts – Diana never really contributed to the progression of the RP and so the skill grade fell slightly as a result.
The Zubat battle was extremely short but Lin managed a good training session with Chi-Chi. One point for battling the Zubats and one for the training. Nothing was spectacular here and so the grade reflects this.
Participation: 1/3
Skill: 5/7
Battling: 2/5
Total: 8/15
Andrew - Tysm (click to showhide)
Part 1, see Diana.
Again, like Diana, Andrew never contributed to the drive of the RP. Not only that, but his interactions with the players were somewhat short and a little lifeless. Don’t be afraid to bunny after a disclaimed such as that in the initial post. If unsure, ask another player how their character would react to something and write it in – missing out on tidbits like this makes your score suffer. I saw nothing in the way of character development.
A quick battle with a bunch of Zubat isn’t really enough to get a high score for the battling section so this suffered.
Participation: 1/3
Skill: 4/7
Battling: 1/5
[b]Total: 6/15[b]
Posted by: Xal Jun 2 2010, 11:50 AM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=35396&st=0 has come to an end. The ending was a bit rushed due to inactivity from people apparently going off PANE I'm such an inspiration.
To summarise it, the group made their way to a volcanic island. Once there, they met up and entered a cave, but were trapped by a cave in. The only way of getting out was to go further in and try to find an alternate exit, but found a cavern filled with fire types. They turned out to be aggressive, and a battle followed as they attempted to escape through a river/cave.
This lead to Magikarp evolving after battling a group of Wartortle, and as they escaped on Gyarados Govannon captured one of the weakened Ponyta. Malcolm wasn't best pleased with that and made his exitfrom the island on the back of Fishy as soon as possible, leading to him being flown to the Furoh mainland when he got swept in to the sea.
Characters:
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=35349 - ShinyTyphlosion.
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=34832 - Vincent Lance
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=34613 - FR0STY
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=22026 - Xal
Posted by: knil1 Jun 8 2010, 12:11 PM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=26308 has come to a dead stop.
knil1 - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=5447
Dragava - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=22674&st=0&p=580137&#entry580137
Gearbits - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=25907
Lux Cruxis - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=13501
Euphraim - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=21717
In the Town of Barley lies a small building located a little bit off the Boardwalk. This building is currently home to a little non-for-profit business called Trainer Training.
Here, a Trainer can learn a variety of skills, such as General Battle information and how to better bond with your pokémon. It's great for starting trainers, but an even better refresher course. Trainers are given hands-on learning experiences that allow for a better knowledge of how things are performed.
Trainer Training is "a school for trainers old and new".
I'd post a summary, but nothing happened....
Posted by: Master Houndoom Jun 8 2010, 03:50 PM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=35396&st=0 was a short RP which was, to be perfectly blunt, driven by one person alone. In the end, that one person ended up alone, leaving even his Partner behind. The RP was enjoyable in parts, and the ending gave me a smile. However, short posts, spelling problems, and a lack of battling drove scores to record lows.
Malcolm Smith: 13/15 (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3 You had 9 total posts, all of good length and all driving the story forward. You also kept on, despite what seemed to be lessening interest from your co-players.
Skill: 5/7 There were some spelling and grammar problems that jarred me while I read. One notable one, which is included because it was a little confusing because it made entirely two different words than were meant was that in an RP you said something "mad either", when I believe you meant "made their". This, of course, is a hard one to detect because a spell check would not detect it as a misspelling, and I point it out to show that a pass over is a good idea, with or without a technological spell checker. As I said, the ending gave me a smile, both with Malcolm's assumption and the result of it, and the reference to the games, making it seemingly easy to travel. There was an issue with Malcolm interacting with someone other than Gavannon. It would have been nice to see him at least try to talk to Frosty or Vincent, and Paul seemed to be ignored upon entering the cave.
Battles: 5/5 To be honest, you were the only one who really battled. There was no clear winner, which I find refreshing, as the entire battle was a stall tactic to try to escape. Some of it was a little bit unbelievable (four wartortle vs. a magikarp should have been a much faster, decisive battle) but I am willing to overlook that as you did not even allow for Fishy's evolved status to make him an instant win.
Vincent Lance: 5/15 (click to showhide)
Participation: 1/3 Not to be harsh, but you had less than a quarter of the posts (mathematically. In reality, you had a quarter, but even that is a small feat: This RP is barely over a page, so a quarter of 20 RPs is 5. Average RP length I look for for full participation is at least 10 a piece, with exceptions as warranted.
Skill: 4/7 Length of post did not factor in as much, though yours were of a decent length and you had good interaction with your Partner. However, there was little to no interaction with the other RPers, which put Vincent and Lanette outside of the group. For this, and not noticing that the charmander that was hatching was the egg that Malcolm was carrying, I had to take points.
Battle: 0/5 Vincent went out of his way not to battle. Therefore, no points were warranted.
Franny 'Frosty' Jalms: 5/15 (click to showhide)
Participation: 1/3 See Vincent Lance
Skill: 3/7 Your thought processes were sometimes hard to follow, as the thoughts seemed to flow oddly, and even contradict themselves. You also didn't interact much with the group, but that was mostly in character and due to little interaction on both sides. The posts were short and did not move the plot along, as Frosty seemed to just follow rather than make her own moves. Again, how much of this can be blamed on interaction from the others remains to be seen.
Battle: 1/5 Soul made a move, and it seemed to be a good one, but that was all. In comparison, there was little to be done.
Paul Charbon: 2/15 (click to showhide)
Participation: 1/3 Ordinarily, I wouldn't even grade this. You had two posts total. But I feel the fact that you were left out could possibly be attributed to no interaction from the others.
Skill: 1/7 This is based more on the lack of posts and short length than grammar and spelling. You could have put more effort into it for a greater score.
Battle: 0/5 I just can't give anything for this.
I want to end by saying that we, as mods, understand when real life gets in the way. However, we, as mods, do not grade at ALL on how long it takes to finish a post, and, if your fellow RPers are agreeable to wait, it's better to do an average or long post over months than it is to do a short post over days.
Posted by: 2gamers Jun 9 2010, 10:22 PM
School’s Out: Review of “Trainer Training”
This RP had a really good plot perfect for the Barley setting. The gateway city had a place for trainers to learn the tricks of the trade. Unfortunately, reality did not want you to finish this RP. It’s disappointing to see it die off before everyone actually got to know each other. At least you guys can move on to more successful endeavors.
Note that I’m only grading kni1, Dragava, Gearbits, and R3ignlasting. Lux has left PANE and Euphraim wasn’t even in this RP.
Koryu Hiroki- knil1 (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 1/3
You had 4 out of the 28 posts. As one of the RP leaders who need to move the RP forward, that’s not good.
Skill: 6/7
You started off well enough, with parts on how Koryu’s pokemon behave. I liked the part where he goes through the brochures and coupons from Barley; it reminded me of my own beach trips. Describing the area around Koryu helped form a picture of where the RP was taking place. Nice work here, but I wish there were more posts to work with. He only just barely interacted with other people.
Battle: 0/5
No battles, no points.
Total: 7/15
Elizabeth Verillo- Dragava (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
You stuck with the RP for seven months. I would have given up on it a long time before that.
Skill: 7/7
I liked the relationship between Lizzie and Riolu. The trainer’s shy demeanor is tempered by her riolu’s outgoing attitude. It made it easier for the two to interact with other players. My only gripe was that some posts focused too much on NPCs rather than Lizzie. Careful with that.
Battle: 5/5
You seemed to have contributed more to the battle. It was played fairly and realistically. I can’t say much more than that.
Total: 15/15
Sawyer Lewis- Gearbits (click to showhide)
Don’t get me wrong, the posts you had were great. However, there were only two of them. You dropped out early, though to be fair, the RP was in and out of comatose. I can only award you the bare minimum here.
Total: 3/15
Don Crall- R3ignlasting (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 1/3
You came in at the last third of the RP. Then you disappeared, finally killing the RP.
Skill: 5/7
Your posts were of good length, though some parts seemed a bit rushed. There could have been more details about the riolu and pichu playing with each other. Your profile said Spark was jolly, but I saw no evidence of that; your first post showed that the pichu was the complete opposite of jolly. As soon as Don met Lizzie, he challenged he to a battle. There was barely any interaction between the two trainers.
I’d also like to note that you “crashed” the RP. That is, you started posting without PMing the RP creator or posting in the discussion thread, which clearly said that no new members were allowed. Since Dragava allowed it, I’ll look the other way. However, it’s considered bad manners to just start posting and implementing your own plot in someone else’s RP without permission. Please don’t do it again.
Battle: 3/5
All pichu did was thundershock and dodge. Put some description in how it played out. How did Pichu dodge? Jumping to the side, ducking, jumping? Maybe implement some jolliness? It seemed like only Dragava wrote the post.
Total: 9/15
Posted by: Douken Sota Jun 12 2010, 05:35 PM
And now, http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=37364 has come to a close.
In this small adventure, http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=21623 gets ready to climb the mountain base when http://pane.wikia.com/wiki/Pandora_%22Pan%22_Gibbs meets up with him, joining in his journey to the city. However, Pan was asked to visit a cave for archeological purposes. On the way uip the climb, Pan falls, but Ivysaur catches her, soon to evolve into Venusaur and pull her up, leaving Douken to climb the rest of the way.
Soon after, they find the cave they want, and soon some tomb raiders, a gothica lolita named Kym who loves treasure, and a Mohawk-wearing punk named Drake, who loves Kym. The two take them hostage after blowing the only known entrance and forced to find what they believe is treasure. However, they get led to two paths. Kym took Douken down one, and Drake took Pan down the other.
While split up, the two decided to damage their relationships, Douken by getting Kym to love him, and Pan to have Drake hate her. Drake's hate was enough to distract him and send out the wrong Pokemon, allowing Pan to escape with everyone else. When the four meet up once more, they get into a Double Battle and fight them off, Douken's Croagunk getting some relief for beating an Ursurang, though still annoyed that he had to team up to do it.
With the thieves gone, they soon find what they were after, which would of disappointed them anyways, and managed to get out and straight to Arasam.
Biggest things:
Turnip evolved
Double battle ensued, victory to Douken and Pan.
Posted by: Master Houndoom Jun 14 2010, 02:45 PM
A review of An Obstacle Known as Mount Carello:
First off, it was good to see this pair team up. I thought they played well off of each other, and that enhanced the RP experience. There were some places where it seemed as if wires had been crossed; Actions by one person did not match actions by the other. These, however, were small and not overly detrimental. After splitting up, having one character play the villain that had gone with the other was great: It allowed for the players to interact even when the characters couldn't.
Douken Sota: 12/15 (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3 It was you and one other. If you hadn't participated, this would have been a short RP indeed.
Skill: 4/7 I wanted to give full marks, but there were some things that I simply could not ignore. For one, your case skipped between present tense and past tense quite a bit. Secondly, spelling was, at times, an issue, as well as some grammar that may have had to do with your verb tenses. The misspelling of Ursaring (You spelled it "Ursuring" consistently) was especially jarring and kept pulling me out of the narrative. Lastly, there was one jarring moment in the battle,between 2gamer's post and yours, in which a fearow appeared without being called. For this, I docked you a point for each place.
That is not to say it was all bad, in fact, it was quite good. There were some short posts, and I encourage you to add some description or action in more posts in the future, but I see a marked improvement even from Castle Vonmoto. Douken's way of handling Kym was clever, and Croagunk's motivation to defeat the ursaring was well played and gave the pokémon closure. All in all, an enjoyable read, with room for improvement.
Battle: 5/5 This is how a team battle should go. It was well thought out and exciting to read, and no one was too overly powered in the win. The pokémon were used to good effect. Assist was cleverly used, but Faint Attack, I felt, was not played out in a consistent manner (which, in the anime, plays as more of a sneak attack than a head on charge). I did not dock for this, however, as it made the battle exciting (who doesn't like the classic charge-and-strike combo?) Seel using the water to her advantage was wonderful. Again, the fearow's sudden appearance and knock out of the seel was jarring, but I attributed that less to battle and more to oversight in introducing the fearow.
Pan Gibbs: 15/15 (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3 See Douken's score for details. :P
Skill: 7/7 You do not fail to deliver an interesting character and read. Pan is definitely unique in her interactions with others and her pokémon, and it's good to see her use her head rather than her pokémon's brawn. It was nice to see Pivot in a battle. I would have, however, like to have seen her new cleffa more than just at the beginning, though that, too, was amusing. Turnip's evolution was handled well, and provided a motivation for the evolution.
There were some small mistakes, misspellings and the like, but they were few and far between and did not deserve a dock in grade.
Battle: 5/5 May seem lazy, but Douken's explanations apply to you as well, since it was done as two joint posts.
Well read, and I look forward to more. I would be quite pleased if this team up didn't end for a while.
Posted by: Drakonawin Jun 18 2010, 06:03 AM
My RP partners have pretty much quit the RP, so I'm gonna put this here due to inactivity.
RP:http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=34066
Characters
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=33187&st=0&p=895845&#entry895845-Drakonawin
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=32757-Luke39
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=33760&pid=915788&st=0&#entry915788-Nuttyjigs
Story Overview (click to showhide)
Zhoom, Holly, and charlie have arrived at the pokemon center, Where their pokemon, More specifically Probe, Marco, and Sam, introduced them. Charlie was shy, so Zhoom challenged him to a battle to get to know him. Um... no one posted after that.
Important Events-Zhoom challenged Charlie to a battle.
Posted by: 2gamers Jun 18 2010, 08:52 AM
Due to the shortness of the RP, I cannot grade this. My general rule is 2 pages (MH says 10 posts per RPer minimum or 1.5 pages).
Posted by: 2gamers Jun 29 2010, 10:51 PM
Snake Beater: Review of “Operation: Wounded Snake”
This RP was a nice showing of Team Deception in action. I’m really happy how it turned out. I liked how Malcolm was oblivious to the interactions between Justin, Nate, and Tag. I can’t think of much more to say, so on with the scores!
Justin Smart/Nate Guzman- Yzarc Drowsnam (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
Skill: 7/7
Justin and Nate have done a very good portrayal of Team Deception. I liked their doubt in their tactics as Malcolm and Tag joined their group. It shows that they’re not quite all bad. It will be interesting to see how they act as their missions get tougher, perhaps more controversial.
Ease up on the language; the little ones are watching
. See the http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?act=announce&f=129&id=4 for details.
Battle: 5/5
Lots of battles, both with wild pokemon and against trainers. It would have been nice if each player played with one of the NPC baddies facing off with another player. That way, no one would be stuck battling by themselves (like Malcolm vs. the “Rangers”). Other than that, it was great.
Total: 15/15 Taggarty Lee- Kamaitachi (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
Skill: 6/7
Tag came off as rather arrogant in this RP. His past experiences apparently gave him the feeling of superiority over the others, particularly Justin and Nate. It was nice to see a less-than cheerful person in PANE for a change.
His suspicions seemed a bit too accurate for my tastes. As soon as he met them, Tag condemned them as villains based on their “aura”. Perhaps a better explanation as to why Tag thought this way would make his suspicions more clear. In addition, I found his mood change in http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=37899&view=findpost&p=1108864 to be a bit confusing. First, he was angry at being “betrayed” (even though he knew he was being tricked from the beginning). Then, after being beaten, his anger seemingly disappears as he walks off. Again, some details as to what was going through Tag’s head at the time would have made his mood swings more believable.
Battle: 5/5
See Yzarc’s score for details. I liked how Tag lost against Justin. Considering both his pokemon participated in prior battles, it seemed like the more realistic option.
Total: 14/15
Malcolm Smith- Xal (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
Skill: 7/7
Malcolm was feeling a bit lonely in this RP. Oblivious to his fellow trainers’ pasts, he desired to form a group with the guys. Perhaps Malcolm was seeking an older male role model to replace his father? It would certainly explain why he traveled with Gonnovan in previous RPs. Sorry if I’m drawing the wrong conclusions, but you provided enough information to suggest hidden meanings in Malcolm’s actions. Bravo.
Battle: 5/5
I think you handled the 3-vs.1 battle well, considering the “Rangers” had 5 pokemon in total. I would have liked to read more on the criminals’ reaction to Gyarados appearing; that would have been funny
.
Total: 15/15
Posted by: Jonahman10 Jul 21 2010, 05:19 PM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=28399&st=0 has been finally completed.
The Characters-
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=26865(Amissa AKA the person who kept the RP alive)
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=28194(Arayl)
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=27987&st=0&p=739556&#entry739556(Ozzy)
http://pane.wikia.com/wiki/Ikozu_%22Iko%22_Toriyama(KingBirdy)
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=28343(Qwert)
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=6596&hl=amelia(Jonahman10)
Crystal Halo [Who's profile cannot be found by me] (http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showuser=56338 assuming this will help find the profile)
Summary-
Amelia and CO. look into mysterious happenings in a strange Grotto in Gigarte. Pollution, fire, and an {Assumedly) evil plot of a mysterious group are all trials they face. We never explained the group but a couple RPs based off what the group was and what they are planning could spring up.
Note- Sorry about my bad muse most of the time. Amissa and Ozzy were the ones that prodded me to make most of the posts.
Posted by: 2gamers Jul 21 2010, 05:56 PM
I'll take this, though it would be nice if you told me who caught what. Also, Kingbirdy's Arayl's, and Logan's profiles are dead, so they won't be getting grades.
Posted by: LittleShadowPokemon Jul 23 2010, 08:55 PM
Pumpkin King and LittleShadowPokemon present
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=16405&st=0&start=0
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=4959&hl= & http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=16100
Joey starts off his Furoh adventure in Barley where he meets timid Vincent. Vincent had been meaning to kick off the classic journey through the region but has remained comfortably at home instead. After getting to know each other a little better, the two decide to set out and explore the world, choosing Fidona as their starting point. As they wait for their ride out of Barley, they spend time together at a fair and later learn the basics of coordinating. Vincent and Joey then embark on a boat and await what fate has in store for them.
*Squirt the Squirtle receives name change (now Typhoon)
*Amazon the Eevee captured by Vincent
*Babylon the Eevee captured by Joey
Posted by: Living Arrow Jul 24 2010, 10:00 AM
Review of “http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=16405&st=0"
This RP had it all in my opinion and I'm very happy to say that the scores reflect it! Both of you keep things realistic, grounded and humorous all at the same time - it was a great read and I recommend other players watch out for your little duo!
Unlike for other roleplays, I think you were both fairly even so I am marking you together:
PK ~ LSP (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3 - You both were equally and fully active in this RP.
Skill: 7/7 - I never got exasperated with your posts, nor did I see anyone edging into the realms of god-modding. Both of you responded smoothly to each others' posts and it all seemed very fluid and professional
. PK: I love that naughty lil Squirtle! Gimme! LSP: Kimiko charmed thugs into sleeping lions! Cool!
Battling: 5/5 - While you guys only had one battle a piece, they were long, well thought-out and very nicely written. Full marks there.
Total: 15/15
Posted by: 2gamers Jul 26 2010, 07:26 PM
Fire and Brimstone: Review of “Gigarte Grotto”
This was a pretty good plot; I’m glad it’s continuing in a separate RP. There are a couple of things on the setting though. First, Gigarte is completely underground, so snowfall wouldn’t be a problem. Second, the group probably should have picked up some gas masks around the work site. As they went deeper into the cave, there would be less outside oxygen and more hydrogen sulfide (that rotting egg smell).
I’m going to try and make this short and sweet, so if you need more details, let me know.
Daniel Worthington- Amissa (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
Skill: 7/7
Daniel was pretty funny at times. I like it when humor is incorporated into RPs. I also enjoyed reading about his interactions with his machop. My favorite part would have to be Daniel risking his skin to save a geodude, only to find out that the geodude would have been fine in the fiery inferno.
The one thing I would have liked to see would be a proper ending to Daniel’s side of the story. We’re left dangling in the middle of his escape.
Battle: 5/5
It can be difficult playing a newbie trainer who doesn’t know all the types and weaknesses. Daniel was a great example. Not only was he inexperienced, but he didn’t come out so well in the trainer match-up. They were nice sized posts too. Good work on staying in character.
Total: 15/15
Delainey Triell- Ozzy (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
Skill: 7/7
There was some good setup for a future friendship with Daniel. I liked their interactions. Again, I would have liked a better ending, especially since she was caught in the middle of a battle.
Battle: 3/5
There were two wild battles and one unfinished trainer battle. The wild battles were good but a bit short (I would liked to have seen more antics from misdreavus).
Total: 13/15
Cheri Puckett- qwert (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 1/3
Your posts were few and you didn’t stick around for the end.
Skill: 6/7
Good posts overall, but there were some slip-ups. Cheri changed outfits in the middle of the RP without explanation (from jeans to cotton skirt). There wouldn’t be puddles of sulfur unless the temperature was around 240 degrees F.
You’re not expected to know that, so I’ll let it slide.
Battle: 3/5
I really wish she made it to the end to get a trainer battle. The geodude battle was good, but I would have liked to see more.
Total: 10/15 Amelia Himan- Jonahman10 (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
Skill: 5/7
I liked the scenery description for Tigiate Square. However, that level didn’t last through the RP. The ending felt rushed. In fact, as the RP went on, Amelia stopped interacting with the other members. It felt as though she was just there to advance the plot. That makes befriending others very difficult.
Battle: 2/5
Combee can’t learn poison sting. While you had two battles, both were short.
Total: 10/15
Posted by: 2gamers Aug 2 2010, 09:42 PM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=38565 is complete!
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=10334- 2gamers
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=21623- Douken Sota
Pan and Douken were playing in all the major events in Arasam. First, they participated in the Arasam contest. Unfortunately, neither could obtain a ribbon from the hall leader Troy. After finding out about Pan and Darryn, he made it up to her and Douken by taking them out for a night on the town. This ended with a drunken joyride across the town, but everyone made it out OK.
The next day, Douken challenged gym leader Otis and came out the winner. The RP ended with the pair leaving Arasam on a hot-air balloon for destinations unknown…
Other stuff:
Douken received a magnamite and won the Emberwing badge.
Pan got her Fire Stone back from the museum.
Posted by: Master Houndoom Aug 5 2010, 11:40 AM
Sorry for the long delay before a reply. Work and Real Life™ has picked up for the vast majority of the mods that are not involved in this roleplay, and I was the first to get a modicum of free time. This is not an excuse, merely an explanation.
I will read it ASAP, and grade it very shortly after that. If I have gone longer than a week, please contact me via PM and remind me that my job is important, but this is no less so.
Posted by: Ruby Charizard Aug 8 2010, 11:56 AM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=40317
Summary from OOC Topic
Shortly after the arrival of three newcomers, a shipment of evolution stones is stolen. The situation quickly turns ugly when the thieves are found to have more tricks up their sleeve than they seemed to at first. Are the three youngsters in over their heads? Find out in PANE: Between A Stone And A Hard Place!
Characters
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=40111
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=33720
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=22674
Posted by: 2gamers Aug 9 2010, 01:14 PM
Stone Cold: Review of “Between a Stone and a Hard Place”
This RP was a bit rushed. I was hoping for more interaction between the main characters. Since Kazill and Zach were more social than Lizzie, they may have been able to coax her out of her shell. However, the story went straight for the action with no breaks for the characters to get to know each other. Next time, try pacing yourselves and savor the story.
Posts could have been longer as well. Include more detail next time. You could also team up with other RPers to make posts via PM/IM for bigger posts and more fluid conversation. Just don’t forget to include a bunny warning .
With that: the grades.
Kazill Ventile- Ruby Charizard (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
Skill: 3/7
I liked the first post where Racket is trying to go back home. Perhaps in future RPs, we’ll see that aspect of Kazill’s pokemon in more detail. Maybe the mankey will find something to love in this new land.
Your posts could have used more detail. For example, in post 14, you could have written about the bad guys unleashing pokemon in preparation to attack. You could have also added Kazill crawling out of the tunnel. In general, I’d like to see posts around one page in length (if you write posts in Word or other word processor, this is easy to tell). These would include feelings of the character, pokemon, and maybe the NPCs you happen to be controlling. A description of the surroundings would have been nice. Also, how did Kazill get to the tunnel? She’s in different locations in every post, but I can’t tell how she’s getting there.
Since Kazill is a people person, I find it hard to believe that she waited until the end of the RP to introduce herself. There was a period where you and Pinsir had writer’s block. That would have been a good time to talk to each other.
Battle: 3/5
Kazill had two battles, but only took minor roles in either one. In fact, her pokemon were around just in time to deliver the finishing blow. There was a little more struggle with the mismagius, but I still would have liked more detail.
Total: 9/15
Zach Schimdt- Pinsir (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
Skill: 2/7
It’s best to save the life-threatening injuries for the end of the RP. Getting hit by a crowbar that hard would have given Zach a concussion and probably would have broken facial bones. That’s a trip to the hospital for stitches and overnight observation (best-case scenario) or surgery (worst-case). Washing it with saltwater would have stung like hell, yet Zach shows no reaction to it. The random paramedic was random. Who called him?
Like I said to Ruby Charizard, more detail please. Though the missing electrike was a good plot twist, it would have been nice if someone metioned that the thieves took it. First, you posted that the thieves weren’t going to steal it. Then, they somehow do. What happened between those posts?
Watch your tenses; you switch to second person (use of “you”) in a couple posts.
Finally, like Kazill, Zach is also a people person. Yet, he interacted very little with the people, only introducing himself at the end of the RP. How about taking time to make friends next time?
On the plus side, you were the only one who mentioned some sort of time of day. It would have been nice to see that play a role in the RP. Did the dim light make it more difficult to track the robbers? Was Zach hungry? Maybe he could have invited Kazill for dinner to get to know each other. They’re young teens; it could happen :P
Battle: 2/5
Very short battles with the zubat and skorupi but one decent one with the mismagius. There didn’t seem to be much risk in the latter; the bad guys were nice enough to let Zach use a potion AND allow him to attack immediately afterwards. You would think they would take advantage of the pause to go after either the pokemon or the trainer.
Total: 7/15
Lizzie Verillo- Dragava (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
Skill: 7/7
Fairly more detailed than the others. I may have mentioned this in your last grade, but I do enjoy the Riolu’s character. One must wonder who’s the real trainer: Lizzie or Riolu :P.
Her shyness was spot on with her personality. It would have been nice for the riolu to encourage her a bit more in talking with others.
Battle: 5/5
Battles were good too. Lizzie had a good balance of victories and defeats, plausible enough for a somewhat rookie trainer. Even though she was the most experienced, it didn’t mean she was wiping the floor with everyone. They were well detailed as well. Again I liked the riolu for his determination.
Total: 15/15
Posted by: Master Houndoom Aug 13 2010, 09:51 PM
A review of Airy Arasam:
I apologize for how long it took for me to get to this. I was lucky enough to have been able to read this as it was posted, and even then my free time is cramped.
Still, I enjoyed this. The contest was fun and the joy ride with Troy (Troy-ride?) was hilarious. I liked the karaoke, and it was a good touch to have links to the songs that were sung
However, if I have one complaint, it's that the gym battle was not very long, especially in comparison to the contests. I am not docking points for this, but we see or gym leaders so seldom: I would like to see fights worthy of their status.
Due to short time, I will be sparse with my comments. My apologies.
Pan Gibbs: 15/15 (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3
Skill: 7/7
Battle: 5/5
Pan continues to be an engaging and unique character. It is nice to see her in a different setting, a little off her footing. It is also nice to see her with down time, and a reliable partner. Keep up the characterizations: They help make a team unique!
Douken Sota: 15/15 (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3
Skill: 7/7
Battle: 5/5
Douken is growing well. I think you still need to keep a wary eye out for Douken becoming far more http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/BadassNative than perhaps he's earned. Everyone needs foibles. I also hope that you will continue to improve in writing. The improvements are quite visible.
Posted by: Kamaitachi Aug 27 2010, 12:37 AM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=39611 is finished up and ready for review.
Synopsis
Originally meant to deal with a 'terrorist' hostage situation in the Petropolis Pokemon center, the RP evolved into a 3-stage storyline, with the tournament at the Happy Happy Department Store, wherein Tag faced Justin once again in mortal combat, and Andrew Harding was introduced to the world of PANE.
The next step was at the pokemon center, where, coincidentally, Tag, Andrew and Justin (as well as Justin's new friends) all found themselves. Out of seemingly nowhere, a group calling themselves "The Sons of Lenoilia" appear, and take over the Pokemon Center, staging a protest over Petropolis' pollution and eventual destruction of their home, Lenoilia. Instead of being held captive, the three stage a little revolt, with Justin taking the brunt of the battle.
The last leg of this rp highlights Tag's gym challenge at the Petropolis Gym, where after a fierce battle, he overcomes the leader Vega.
Dramatis Personae:
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=37696
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=10528
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=17234
Also Featuring:
Jill, Alec, Kerry and James
Sons of Lenoilia
Vega
Pistol Jones
Annabel Yu
Thank you!
Posted by: 2gamers Aug 29 2010, 08:34 PM
“Smart-Lee” Done: Review of “Lockdown”
Overall, I liked the budding friendship between Justin and Tag. It’ll be interesting to see how this relationship grows as they find out more about each other. I’ll keep comments brief so I can get this out ASAP.
Kamaitachi- Taggarty Lee (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
Skill: 7/7
It’s clear that Tag is starting to grow out of his former identity from Johto. Despite his rough treatment of people, he melts for his pokemon, particularly the cute ones.
Battle: 5/5
Lots of battles, though you kind of got lazy during NPC battles (OHKO against butterfree). The quality of the other battles more than makes up for it.
Total: 15/15
Yzarc Drowsnam- Justin Smart (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
Skill: 7/7
I’m really liking Justin’s struggle with life events. It seems like he’s still trying to figure out himself. It’s likely one of the reasons he and Tag are starting to get along, as both are trying to forge new identities for themselves. I really would have liked for Justin to exit the RP properly with some sort of finality (ex. Joining Jill and co. at the party).
Battle: 5/5
There were some good battles here as well. His relationship with Pinsir was well-done here.
Total: /15
Martial- Andrew Harding (click to showhide)
Total: 3/15
Generally, we require at least 10 posts to be eligible for a grade. Since the few posts that you made were pretty good. I’ll give you the minimum of three points. Try and stick around until the end next time.
Posted by: Ice Jet Sep 3 2010, 07:54 AM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=41132 is *finally finished!
Summary:
Ivan, Alex, Twila, and James are heading out to Port Barley, riding on S.S. Lady to Furoh. Instead of a relaxing cruise, a pickpocket is on the loose, and aboard the ship and had stolen some valuable items, including some of their pokemon. They tried to find the thief high and low, but they ended up running around in circles. Until up to the last minute, they spotted the thief and chased him and battled his pokemon, and it was a success. All were returned back, and some of them gained new pokemon along the way.
Characters:
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=40618 ==> Teh AquaJet Ice Jet
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=40852 ==> NES2
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=37846 ==> luke39
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=40783&hl= ==> SaphireShadows
Significant NPCs:
Uncle Andrew
Rocky
New / Transferred Pokemon:
Kurt
Trikey
Mai
Posted by: Living Arrow Sep 3 2010, 09:37 AM
Ahem… SINCE WHEN DO THIEVES ACTUALLY WEAR BLACK MASKS?!
RP Grading - Boat Rockers
General Notes
You guys are some die-hard roleplayers! I counted 8 posts in one day! Just make sure that none of you gets too eager and leaves other behind unnecessarily – remember, we all have real life stuff to deal with too. Also, I appreciate you all had to set up your characters on the ship but the first interaction was 11 posts in! Don’t be afraid to start off interaction faster in the future.
A word on god-modding. Although there wasn’t any degree of god-modding that I felt necessary to bring up, I felt it was right just to make you all aware that having your trainers “know too much” is just as much god-modding as taking control of other characters. No character is perfect and all of yours are 11-18 years old so it is highly unlikely that they’d know details about every Pokemon in the pokedex. Try to consider that in your next roleplays.
Battles. Please agree on battle proceedings and outcomes either in your discussion thread or in pm. I don’t really want to see OOC debates mid-roleplay. We mods have had to sort out a lot of god-mod battles in the past since battles were not agreed between players beforehand. Please get into the habit of discussing battles in more depth with each other before you post.
Not only that, but agree on some moves that can fill out a single player’s posts. It gets frustrating reading posts that only describe one attack.
Also, in future roleplays you can battle NPCs in a single post – there is no need for another player to control them.
That said, this RP had a simple plot-line suitable for any beginner but I have to say it wasn’t played out as well as I think you all could do. Parts seemed rushed, disjointed and above all confusing to read. Read individual sections for levels awarded. And remember - all criticism here is constructive.
Ice Jet - Ivan (click to showhide)
Activity: 3/3
Skill: 2/7
Although it was clear that you had a lot in mind for your character from the get-go, I must admit it became confusing since details were left out that would have been much more helpful (i.e. I didn’t have to read Ivan’s profile first). For example: Where is this dude from? I’m assuming somewhere in kanto since he went to Vermillion…. Oh look! Fuschia City!
I also became confused (yeah, it doesn’t take much) by the perspective used in your writing. Jumping from present tense to past was weird. Please just write in past tense – it’s a lot easier since that’s the way everyone else does it.
Aaaand, your sentences are pretty much always really short. Although that can be effective in some cases, it becomes frustrating when trying to read a flowing story. Consider rolling some sentences together to give the reader something to hold onto before another idea is right on top of them.
Some examples of what I mean:
Ivan had his Bulbasaur attack a man *before* he considered that the guy was the thief… That makes Ivan kinda rude in my book :P
Check posts #18-19. What makes you think James was talking to Ivan? Read other peoples’ posts in full so you can write appropriate responses.
Battling: 3/5
Battles were frequent but disjointed.
Total: 8/15
A note on Ivan’s profile: Shivers is only level 8… He is permitted to be level 10 if you so wish BEFORE allocation of level points awarded for this roleplay. You don’t need to ask permission to change it – just go ahead if you want to. If you do, Kurt shall start at level 10 rather than level 9.
Luke39 - James (click to showhide)
Like Ice Jet, your character’s Pokemon are at a lower level than what is actually allowed. If you want to raise their levels to 10 each before allocation of levels from this roleplay, go ahead. If not, we won’t force you (but why not take the boost?). If you do, both of James' Pokemon shall be level ten prior to allocation of these levels.
Activity: 3/3
Skill: 2/7
James claimed to have seen someone that could have been the thief when running down the corridor… There are plenty of people on the boat. What makes him assume the thief is male? What about the guy was suspicious? Nothing? So why would he mention it to some random dude on deck? Please consider cause and reaction events in your posts and give us all the details so we don’t get confused by what’s going on.
Watch out for your character perspectives – you jumped from third person (he, she) to first person (I, we) mid-roleplay. Please only write in third person. Thanks.
Sentences like this: “James started to feel as though that nice had started going away that Muddy was gone.” don’t make sense. Please read through your posts before clicking “post new message” to ensure things like this don’t happen.
Battling: 3/5
Battles were frequent but disjointed.
Total: 8/15
NES2 - Alexander (click to showhide)
Activity: 3/3Skill: 5/7On the whole, I didn't have many problems at all with your writing. Watch out for posts that are so short they arent worth posting and try to advance the stroy a bit more with each post rather than relying on others to do it for you.
“Alex swam over to the side with his pokemon, and tried to have a bit of fun with the girl.” Goodness gracious! I hope he asked for permission! :P And if he thinks 3 years is a large age gap between himself and Twila, he’s totally kidding himself
Battling: 4/5Battles were written nicely but in places could have done with better planning outside of the roleply (see the general notes for details).
Total: 12/15 SaphireShadows - Twila (click to showhide)
Activity: 3/3
Skill: 6/7
Twila is a bit of an oddball for me. I mean, who would want to challenge a load of gym leaders if they were that shy?! She also seemed to get over her shyness in the space of hours... odd! :p I'm letting that slide for the moment as I really enjoyed Twila's side-skit to obtaining Mai's antidote and retrieving her prized Pokemon.
Following the trail of oil to find the thief was inspired roleplaying. TEN POINTS TO RAVENCLAW… Or just some to your rp skill :p
Battling: 4/5
Battles were written nicely but in places could have done with better planning outside of the roleply (see the general notes for details).
Total: 13/15
For your profile, please note my comments on our other players’ Pokemon. You were entitled to start with 2 level 10 Pokemon and capture a Pokemon with their average level. Therefore, I will allow you to set all three of your Pokemons’ levels to 10 before allocation of levels granted by this roleplay. If you’d rather not, that’s up to you.
Take this roleplay as good practice for your next ones and please try to take on board our comments. We
want to give you as many points as possible so don't give us reasons not to! When you are ready, please update your current levels posts with this grading.
Thanks,
~LA
Posted by: Master Houndoom Sep 30 2010, 03:03 AM
From the brightest days
The darkest nights will arrive
This is our story.
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=34057 has ended.
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=4110, http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=3869, http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=3869&view=findpost&p=946040, and http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=6401 leave Tuesday's uncle DeBrody's ranch refreshed and rejuvenated. Remembering the first time they were caught outdoors, they find themselves wary, afraid, but this does not keep them from, once again, getting attacked. This time, rather than simply drawing them away from each other, the villains blow them away (literally) and scatter them, separating them not only from each other, but also their pokemon.
This wouldn't be anything more than annoying... if they hadn't proceeded to set the forest on fire...
Posted by: 2gamers Oct 12 2010, 10:48 PM
Finally posted this, though I may have been a bit nitpicky.
Review of “Divide and Conquer”
Once again, we find Team Rouge in trouble again, this time involving a brief encounter with a gun. Instead of using the gun though, the bad guys decided to whirlwind the team away, along with their pokemon. That part I don’t get: why would they whirlwind all the pokemon and their human targets away, and then proceed to kill them with a wildfire? Weren’t they after them in the first place? If you’re going to do that, why not just shoot them? Unless the “whirlwinder” is actually a good guy in disguise (I doubt it), I sense a massive plot hole. (I’m probably reading too much into it though.)
I do like the concept for the RP though. Splitting them up and interacting with their friends’ pokemon was an excellent idea and revealed more about their relationships. It’s funny to see that, while the humans grew close over time, their pokemon did not share the same kinship. A fun read overall.
The battle section was difficult to grade. The battle kept ending and restarting, and pokemon I thought had fainted were suddenly fighting again. It’s one of the reasons this took so long to grade (aside from my busy schedule).
NOTE: To anyone else reading this, if this RP gave you the idea of implementing guns into your RPs, you’d best check with the mods. I really don’t want to see gunfights replace pokemon fights. I definitely don’t want to see people taking gunshot wounds and walking away. Again, mod permission only, please.
Master Houndoom- Jaima Kuonji/Meiko Omura (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
Skill: 7/7
It’s nice to see Jaima and Meiko apart from each other. As of late, they always seem to be close together, so it’s a good change (especially for Meiko) to have them act alone in a dangerous situation.
Battle: 5/5
Lots of battles. Can’t say much more than the usual.
Total:15/15
Living Arrow- Darryn Kellor (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: /3
Skill: 7/7
Looks like Darryn is taking a darker turn, erasing people’s memories and all. It’ll be interesting to see what happens when his friends find out.
Battle: 5/5
Great work, and I’m interested in how Darryn used his newfound powers to influence pokemon battles. What’s stopping him from using his powers to get easy wins in contests or help Jaima out in his gym battles? It’d be nice to see a struggle with the ethics in the future.
Total: 15/15
Umbrae Calamitas- Tuesday Berdison (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
Skill: 6/7
Sorry to pick on you in this RP, but there are some things that I think need to be addressed.
Early in the RP, Cassandra saved the day with awesome psychic powers. Perhaps
too awesome. Even though she was miles away, her psychic powers not only saved Tuesday and co. from certain death, but
every single living being in the vicinity. I’m not even sure an alakazam can do that, much less a kadabra. Her powers were legendary level, so I have to take points off. Since you’re your usual RPing self, that lessened the sting.
Battle: 4/5
I had problems with one particular post (post 47). First:
QUOTE
The rampardos fused together into the real Zulu, and then the real Zulu slammed his head into Zorro’s body. There was a heavy CRUNCH as a number of bones in Zorro’s body shattered on impact with the rampardos’ skull, and then the riolu was airborne, catapulted backward until the force of gravity drug him back to earth and he crashed to the ground in a heap of blue and black fur.
At the end of that same post:
QUOTE
Zorro ran back toward Tuesday. He could see Ashleigh fighting a great dinosaur and a man whipping out commands, and there was the captain, Odysseus, running back, too, and his hermana was pushing herself to her feet. Hair hanging ragged, damp, and filthy in her face, she stood up tall, glaring at the man with fire in her eyes, a snarl on her lips.
If you have shattered bones, you’re not going anywhere. I know those posts get huge, but you should keep track of what’s going on.
Total: 13/15
Posted by: 2gamers Nov 20 2010, 09:52 PM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=42277 is finished!
http://pane.wikia.com/wiki/Pandora_%22Pan%22_Gibbs- 2gamers
http://pane.wikia.com/wiki/Douken_Sota- Douken Sota
http://pane.wikia.com/wiki/Justin_Smart- Yzarc Drowsnam
Our heroes stop by at the largest daycare facility in Furoh: Loch Ranch. Along with meeting the Loch family, Pan is reunited with Justin, their first meeting occuring in the Underground. From the group is put to work with the task of finding eggs around the ranch. Thoughout their exploration of the ranch, Pan's growlithe is reunited with his old master (who doesn't even remember him), Douken encounters an odd pairing of xatu and skarmory, and Justin gets closer to his pokemon. Later in the night, he also gets closer to Pan. A potential relationship may be in the offing.
The Cult of Darkrai shows up to ruin everyone's night's rest. A large battle ensues as the enemy attempts to capture a spiritomb egg. Douken does a decent job in protecting the hatchery, while Pan and Justin tag-teamed to fight the forces outside. Later on, Pan gets trapped in the middle of a tauros herd. Her growlithe Fenrir evolves just in time to rescue her and corral the tauros. Crisis averted!
The group departed in the morning. Douken captures a skarmory, while Pan and Justin hope their separate paths don't stay separate forever. Justin leaves for Arasam, while Pan and Douken ride on their pokemon for Petropolis.
Posted by: Living Arrow Nov 21 2010, 05:20 AM
We were definitely onto a winner when we created the Loch Ranch but you guys have managed to up it that little bit more! I loved this RP and all of the players in it – the scores are reflected by this.
RP Grading - Lackadaisical Repose and Leery Rascals at Loch Ranch
General Notes
Well thought-out posts, some epic battles, humour, tear-jerking moments and splash of romance? The roleplay truly had it all. As a fan of this trio, I had it on *track topic* to keep up to date the whole way and I was not disappointed. In fact, if I could give out more than just 10 levels I would!
Typically, there is little else to do other than help the Lochs with their work but somehow you managed to throw in a cult...… A CULT! *squeee!*
2gamers - Pan Gibbs (click to showhide)
Activity: 3/3 You posted sufficiently. ‘Nuff said.
Skill: 7/7 Going to be honest here. I think you’re one of the ones where getting anything lower than 7 would be difficult. Posts are always on the money - not only do you have awesome content (such as the beautiful story between Fenrir and Ronald) with some brilliant plot driving moments (where did the Cult of Darkrai come from!?) everything was kept realistic and nothing flew off any sort of handle.
Now, I actually did get a bit sad as soon as the whole Fenrir/Ronald skit started. It was just so... so... sad! I love little big Fenrir and seeing him go through that was kinda awful! But it got happy in the end so I did to!
Thanks, btw, for the Darryn reference :P
Battling: 5/5EPIC CULT BATTLE. This was enough for a 5! But wait! What’s this?! CHICHI IN A SEED BOMB FILLED BATTLE WITH A GOLEM!!!???? 10 POINTS!... Ugh, limit is 5. Sorry! :p
Total: 15/15
Douken Sota - ...… (click to showhide)
Activity: 3/3 Indeed, there was activity. Pwnd.
Skill: 7/7 Douken Douken Douken. Every time you come through another RP, you get better. I have to admit that really this is the first time where I’ve gone “hey! That was pretty damn good!” with you but this roleplay was wicked. Feeding a Magnemite a battery? A bisexual Xatu? Awesome. I loved the mini-skit between the Skarmory and Xatu
Although Douken is partly a stereo-trainer with the bravery and hot headedness he is still human and you didn’t deviate from this. Nice job.
Battling: 5/5 I think it was a bit unfair for Douken to attack that poor Skarmory before it even made a move itself… Even so, it was a good battle and it was nice to see Rusty getting some action. Clearly that battery did the trick! Not only did you have a nice bit of training but an UBER EPIC BATTLE. Full marks.
Total: 15/15 Yzarc Drowsnam - Justin Smart (click to showhide)
Activity: 3/3 Take a break? NEVAH! Full points.
Skill: 7/7 Justin aint a normal trainer. I mean, really, he’s not even a particularly
good trainer. Not only that, he’s in frikkin TEAM DECEPTION! Out of all our active members he’s probably the most mature and I think you play him brilliantly (and dodge the over-swearing fine pretty darn well, too!). It was really nice to see Justin just travelling rather than being flung into a mission - the inbetween bits are always necessary!
Bit heroic this Justin fella! Saving Pan like that... or is it the hormones talking?! :P On a serious note though, he's a complete sex pest. Poor Pan! At least he's not as rapey as Troy, but he's not far from it!
It’ll sure be interesting if Darryn ever encountered this fellow. That’ll
have to happen at some point.
Battling: 5/5(I'm kinda scared of Pinsir
) To quote yourself and a fellow mod: "Justin's constant elbowing of the man's impressively hard stomach seemed to be doing nothing. How emasculating." How true :P Darryn was screaming "AIM LOWER!" all the way through that!
Total: 15/15 A great read and an example of what a roleplay
should be. Definitely marking you guys as players for Darryn's future (yes, he is sadly separating from Team Rogue very very soon).
~LA
Posted by: luke39 Dec 5 2010, 03:48 AM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=43617 was abandoned(I was busy with exams and it was a let down to the others.
Luke39 - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=37846
Absoleevee - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=43300&pid=1300806&st=0&#entry1300806
Dragon Maiden - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=17136
James has arrived in Port Barley and has found a flyer and reads it. It is about the Pokeathlon, James is interested about it but there is something else happening. He get's distracted by a group of Wild Krabby's and a group of Wild Shellders. They are fighting over Territory and a Water Stone. They are running around at the Marina and holding up all the boats as the captains don't want to hurt them. James sees this as something he could help in. He needs 2 people to help him settle these pokemon down. And will James ever pursue a dream of becoming a Pokeathlete?
We didn't make it far so I submitted it to grading and no one has shown interest in continuing it.
Important Events so far:
Ali caught an Eevee.
Thanks
Luke39
Posted by: 2gamers Dec 5 2010, 09:34 AM
Due to the shortness of the RP, I cannot grade this. My general rule for a 3-person RP is 30-40 posts or around two pages. There are only 17 posts in this RP.
Posted by: Haunted Dec 27 2010, 11:33 PM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=43193 is done!
Dramatis Personae
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=42644 - Haunted
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=42633 - Tymid
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=37696 - Kamaitachi
Cameron Ramirez, a spoiled-rich rock star from Petropolis, is en route to Gigarte for his tour. Along the way something goes wrong with one of the buses, and the one Cameron is in is forced to stop just outside Lenolia. Fed up, Cameron storms off into the dangerous city with only his Pokemon by his side. Meanwhile, Raven Amaranth is on a walk through Lenolia when she and Taggarty Lee, fresh from the hostage crisis in Petropolis, hear Cameron's screams as he is attacked by a trio of bandits. After rescuing his sorry arse helping him out, the three travel to the city's run-down Pokemon Centre, where Tag formulates a plan to rescue the captive Pokemon held in a smuggling ring not too far off. After giving Raven and Cameron a to-the-point lesson in battling, the trio engage in a battle royale with the smugglers. They don't come out unscathed, however - Tag suffers a gunshot wound, Raven gets in a no-holds-barred fight with two of the smugglers, and Cameron takes a knife to the shoulder.
Thankfully, they manage to rescue all of the captured Pokemon. Cameron learns a lesson in hubris and gets a chilling note from his aunt back home, saying that his corporate-empire father is planning something. The trio then quick-travel to Loch Ranch, where the three finally part ways.
Posted by: Living Arrow Dec 28 2010, 04:48 AM
OK. To start myself off on the right footing for this grading, I went back to the three profiles and read them through again. DAY-UM! These three had so much personality it made my teeth hurt! Even so, it excited me to see how you guys would make a blend of such headstrong characters.
RP Grading – Lost in Lenoilia
General Notes
This RP consisted:
Gathering of group
Tag and Raven battle 3 stooges
Trip to Pokemon Center
Battle training session between Tag and Cameron
Battle Royale
Lovey-Pidovey ending
Now, when we say Battle Royale, sure we all imagine a big battle. But this?! This was on a whole new scale. That baby went on for literally weeeeeeks! It can’t hurt your score when I’m grading but it CAN make a mod sigh with exhaustion after reading battle after battle after battle. In future, I’d pull back on the volume of battling a little more but make individual battles a bit more epic… Like Rocky! xD
Another word of warning on battling – remember that Pokemon get tired even if they win. With so many battles in there, you were close on god-mod territory. True, there were some great strategies in there, courtesy of Tag, but I couldn’t help feeling that too much was being done. Your scores weren’t effected this time but please keep it in mind for the future.
Haunted – Cameron Remirez (click to showhide)
Activity: 3/3 You were active. Congrats?
Skill: 7/7 Amazing backstory. Although he isn’t the only musically talented person in Furoh, he’s definitely the most famous! But getting left behind like that? PRICELESS! You have no idea how much I wanted a Grimer to gunk on him during this RP :P
Really smooth cuts to other locations/side stories put you at a 7 before anything else was even considered! Congrats
And I did like that you kept Cameron true to his character. He didn’t suddenly become an amazing battler, but he did grow from the experience. I especially liked the change in sprite to depict this.
Battling: 5/5 Thunder Waves are go! Joking aside, the battle Cameron took part in were clever, many and varied.
Total: 15/15
Tymid – Raven Amaranth (click to showhide)
Activity: 3/3 You were active. Congrats?
Skill: 7/7 Creepy-ass opener! *Shudders* I instantly wanted to give Raven a hug (or send Darryn for me) after that nightmare! Following this up with the hilarious image of a smoker-Totodile? Now, that made me laugh! But her view on well-groomed Pokemon and Contest is wrong… WRONG! Darryn certainly wouldn’t hug her if he ever found out she didn’t like his style of training :P
One thing did bother me in this rp: “For a while, Raven had been working with non-verbal communication in training her poke'mon.” I don’t rmember reading this anywhere else. As such it serves as one of those ‘oh! How convenient!’ moments which I am not a big fan of. It didn’t effect your score though – everything else was so good, it didn’t particularly matter.
And as for the Larvitar – you’re good enough now to capture it at the end of the next roleplay or at the very beginning of the one after that. Until then, Raven can’t use him in battle.
Battling: 5/5 Now, this is what we like! Some human-a-human action! Of course, it doesn’t count towards this score but I like to see some real-life reactions like Raven punched this Clem dude in the face.
Battles were decent and you kept them to a high quality. Full marks.
Total: 15/15
Kamaitachi – Taggarty Lee (click to showhide)
Activity: 3/3 You were active. Congrats?
Skill: 7/7 “watching as Kyoko leapt down off the bench, almost greedily slamming her head/body into the bowl to eat. It was odd.” LMFAO. At first, I had an issue with the way Tag speaks – he is especially formal, even for a 27-year-old but then I remembered he was originally a Dragon trainer and so probably grew up with ideas of respect and how to speak dictated to him as he grew up. After that, it seemed completely normal :P
Battling: 5/5 This might seem odd but my favourite part of Tag’s battles was where Kyoko used Worry Seed on that Koffing – nice way to control battle! IRL, I’d never think to use that but it’s a really clever technique. That Twilight Badge was well-earned, it seems
Oh, and this: “her quick reflexes had saved her from being vivisected at the waist” made me gasp a little bit. Poor Suzu! Anyway, with Tag around with knowledge of “Same-Type Attack Bonus, and the Super Effective Typing” they were sure to win whatever came up :p
Total: 15/15
Posted by: Yzarc Drowsnam Jan 18 2011, 10:59 PM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=48309
Justin Smart and Nate Guzman, relatively new (and very low ranking) members of Team Deception are given their second assignment. They are to take an unknown package and sell it to a group of five men in a cave in Mt. Carello. Needless to say (or maybe I did...I don't know, whatever), the five decide not to pay up. Seeing as how they outnumber Justin and Nate five to two, it was certainly a smart decision at the time. Justin and Nate run away, leaving behind the money. Nate, barely conscious after being punched in the face, accidentally leaves behind Da Bomb, his numel.
The two run into Taggarty Lee and Raven Amaranth, who are there independently of each other, but also know each other. And Justin and Nate already knew Tag. Crazy Random Happenstance indeed! Anyway, Raven and Tag agree to help out a bro in need (though Justin and Nate only mention that Da Bomb was stolen). Some events occur, blah blah blah, characters get frustrated with each other, some characters do some really douchey things (one, in particular) and stuff.
Roleplayers Involved
1. Yzarc Drowsnam
- http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=10528 - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=9558&view=findpost&p=834750
- http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=34660&view=findpost&p=1054022 - http://pane.wikia.com/wiki/Nate_Guzman
2. Tymid
- http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=42633 - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=9558&view=findpost&p=1274643
3. Kamaitachi
- http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=37696 - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=9558&view=findpost&p=1068240
Other Notes:
Justin's Bonsly evolved into Sudowoodo
Raven's Aria evolved into Luxio
Raven caught Forte the Larvitar
Tag caught Orin the Snorunt
Reason for edit: I left out a digit in the link to the RP. My b
Posted by: Living Arrow Jan 19 2011, 11:58 AM
For you three roleplayers, I really don't see a need to bolster your egos with words of congrats on an RP well done... BUT I WILL ANY WAY! I really enjoyed this roleplay and feel like I've gotten to grips with your characters pretty well now. A few minor blips on the radar this time but nothing that can't be worked on.
RP Grading – When Crime Pays
General Notes
This RP consisted:
Some douches in a cave
Some nice people in a cave
A Tyranitar in a cave
Battles in a cave
Captures in a cave
Battles outside a cave
The battles here were good until the end section. That much really wasn't needed. Yes, it was nice to have a battle roayle. No, the enemies didn't need that many Pokemon. Yes, you decide how many battles to have. No, I didn't like it. This issue, however, hasn't harmed your grades but let it be known that I got sick of reading battles! :p
For Raven and Tag, I want to make something incredibly clear for future roleplays. Although they have heard the name "Team Deception" now, they do not know what that means so would not automatically link it to anything that goes on in future unless Nate or Justin is involved. Sure, they could think about it, but other than that they know literally nothing about the organisation.
Read on for scores.
Yzarc Drowsnam – Justin Smart (click to showhide)
Activity: 3/3 You were active.
Skill: 7/7 Probably some of the best dialogue I've seen on this site comes from your characters - I'm a big fan.
I like that we are seeing Justin's human side throughout these roleplays to serve as a reminder that he's in TD for the money and nothing else. Will that backfire on him in future? Who knows. But that's creating suspense and I love it! No complaints on style and you always keep true to your characters, Nate included (I OUGHT TO WASH HIS MOUTH OUT WITH SOAP AND WATER!).
Battling: 4/5 Good battles throughout. However, I have to dock a point for Hitmontop. Sure, we get it - he's powerful. But give the geezer a break! He battled a Tyranitar, Gallade, Manectric and then "went to town" on a Mamoswine? Bit far if you ask me.
Total: 14/15
Tymid – Raven Amaranth (click to showhide)
Activity: 3/3 You were active.
Skill: 6/7 HAAAAAA! I love how Raven thought the Tyranitar was dead and didn't think that it was sleeping
first (lovely plot twist) but at the same time I thought that the moment could have been captured a little better with some more description of how it was positioned etc. After all, Team Deception *may* have just defeated it in battle and it was unconscious. Since these details were left out, I couldn't help but raise an eyebrow.
She, out of a lot of other trainers in PANE-land, is one of the most surprising when it comes to how soft and gentle she can be with her Pokemon when they share a rough exterior. These moments are always nice to read and show off a lot more about Raven than her battling skills so they are valuable and appreciated when they appear.
I do, however, have moments of uncertainty reading Raven's dialogue. I understand that she is from a wealthy background and so would be well spoken... But using words like "thus" in general conversation sounds like something only a Professor would do... It just doesn't sit right with me.
Especially when she then goes on to call someone a "jackass"...
Oh, and she blacks out too often for my liking
Battling: 4/5 Ugh, sorry to say it but you fell into one of my pet hates on a roleplay like this - having your character suggest things to others during battle. While I find it ok in terms of something like a gym match I just don't think Raven would have had time to think about shedding advice with her own problems to deal with. Plus, I don't believe Raven is actually experienced enough to be thinking things like: "Raven could only hope and pray that they would listen to her, otherwise, all would be for naught." It is far far more likely for someone like Tag to take that stance.
That said, however, your battles were decent enough for a good grade (well thought out and of decent length). The non-verbal command system works well for her, too.
Total: 13/15 Kamaitachi – Taggarty Lee (click to showhide)
Activity: 3/3 You were active.
Skill: 6/7 Things were going well until Tag spat at Justin's feet. For me, that was a really exaggerated reaction that wasn't explained all too well. It would have been nice to see some of conflict for him - he didn't know what Team Deception was or even is, so why would he necessarily react that way? Just because Nate admitted they were "criminals"? I doubt it. And he didn't have anything to say to Justin and Nate in the hospital? Really? Some interesting things to think about for the next RP.
On the plus side, you kept true to Tag's righteous nature though, which I liked.
Torchwood and Dr Who!!!!! NICE! (Where is Captain jack????)
Battling: 5/5 Lots of nice battles - especially the final battle. In the cave, it was good to see Tag admitting his disadvantages and letting Nate help out - humanising him in this particular respect was important for me as he seems to be almost too perfect at times. Plus, I adore the strategies that he uses - really brings the game mechanics into the roleplay, which I like.
Total: 14/15
Until next time,
~LA
Posted by: Pinsir Jan 19 2011, 06:35 PM
NES2, you forgot me...
Posted by: Bogart Jan 20 2011, 12:31 AM
I'll take it, but please be advised I have a battery of tests looming over the horizon. I will, however, attempt to complete my grading posthaste.
Posted by: 2gamers Jan 23 2011, 10:24 PM
SUPER QUICK RP GRADING: Review of "The Move Tutor"
Since nuttyjigs is the only remaining player, I'm only grading her. The results:
Participation: 3/3. You stayed to the bitter end!
Skill: 4/7 Wildly erratic post length, but those that were bigger were pretty good.
Battle: 2/5. Trainer battle was good, but I would have like to have seen more. Perhaps that would have happened if the RP reached its conclusion, but we'll never know.
Total: 9/15. Not a terrible start. Keep it up!
Posted by: Pibbler Feb 13 2011, 04:24 PM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=50224 (Pibbler)
Branwys "Tinkertot" Muphenz (Master Houndoom) and Lysander Kirby Doyle (Umbrae Calamitus) dropped out.
Overwiew (click to showhide)
Characters come from various ways, Felisha from home, Branwys from a schooner and Kirby from a bus. Felisha encounters Kirby, knocking him over. Before Branwys's entry, Kirby's Shinx, Lionheart pukes on Felisha. Branwys explodes (though not literally) after be mistaken for a young child due to her height and storms off to the Pokemon Center, where Kirby follows. After having a check-up of Watcher (a Duskull) and Lionheart, Kirby and Branwys go to the Pokemart to get a Pamphlet to locate Demalr Cave. Meanwhile, after leaving the city, Felisha is jumped by a wild Dustox. After a hit of Confusion, Terry, Felisha's Shinx attacked her, knocking her out for several minutes. At this, Terry went into a rage and nearly defeated the Dustox and would have, had Felisha not woken up and called Terry back. With that, Felisha sent out Jamie, her Mankey, and had her use Covet. With the Dustox on the ground and near fainting, Felisha caught and healed the Dustox, dubbed Trouble, and went south until reaching the cave. She went down into the cave, scared three times by Numel scurrying past. Felisha stopped and pondered what to do. But before she could decide, an Onix tunneled by. This was the last event of the last post.
Important Events:Felish obtains a new Pokegear.
Branwys drops her phone into the sea.
Lionheart pukes on Felisha.
Branwys gets very mad and embarrases herself in front of a lot of people.
Felisha is knocked out by her own Pokemon.
Felisha catches Trouble the Dustox.
Posted by: Cavalcade Feb 14 2011, 04:45 PM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=49573 has concluded!
Players:
- Celino Molenaro — http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=9558&view=findpost&p=1135888
- Eron Ingress — http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=9558&view=findpost&p=1269455
Summary:Eron Ingress finds himself helping out at Loch Ranch — albeit doing it unwillingly. Seemingly unable to give up his glamourous life, he dreads the mud and the heavy rain, especially when a man clad in orange runs into him and gets the wet dirt all over him. Enter Celino Molenaro — deaf man that's unable to speak.
Eron begrudgingly tries to be nice to the creepy man and they end up bonding slightly. Celino, having recognised the rockstar, cuts his hair to make him less recognisable. Even their pokemon bond — Celino's stuck up Pichu named Pride finds himself caring for the sick Runner, another Pichu. They place Runner near the generator in the egg incubator, where they've been storing unique eggs that the two have never seen before, and go eat...
...when an explosion sounds, sending tremors through the farm house. It turns out, Team Deception, disguised as farmhands, has caused the generator to explode, and they quickly take as many eggs as they can. With Runner still in the now aflame incubator, the two dive into action, attempting to stop the team whilst the farmhands' water pokemon try to halt the fire. In the end, they get Runner and a majority of the eggs out. However, Team Deception has taken some rare ones. Angered at this, Eron leads Celino to them and they take them out. Although, Eron's dad has been alerted to Eron's whereabouts...
Important Happenings:- Celino acquires a Sewaddle egg, whilst Eron gets a Blitzle egg.
- Team Deception is spotted near Loch Ranch
Posted by: Kamaitachi Mar 12 2011, 04:35 AM
Never Eat Boardwalk Nachos
I want to thank you all for your patience. There are some of you that have been purged from PANE, but you still get grades anyways, in case you one day decide to return and collect them.
The build in the rp was very slow. Since you had so many characters, it took FOREVER to get everyone to even meet. There was a lot of interaction, but I'm surprised no one took the time to talk to one another. "Where are you from? What pokemon do you have?", etc, until much later. Since all of the characters were starting their journeys, wouldn't that be the sort of thing to talk about?
A technical aspects: Houndour evolves into Houndoom at Level 24. Most of your pokemon were at least ten levels lower by comparison, if not more. Combine this with three other Houndour, it's borderline ridiculous. At least the Muk was taken out by an Empoleon.
I know it's hard to create an interesting story when characters are dropping out left and right, but I appreciate your work in pushing through.
Alexander Wells - NES2
The Score (click to showhide)
Participation: 1/3 You kinda stopped while still at the restaurant. You seem to have completely missed the major events in the rp.
Skill: 6/7. You had some very good posts, across the board. However, I noticed that you'd miss out on some of the conversational aspects. Most notably is when he meets Liz. "What brings you to Barley?" is responded to with "A Boat did." You, as the roleplayer, acknowledged the joke, but we never saw Alexander react to it.
Battle: 0/5 No battles, no points. Sorry.
Final Score: 7/15
Tyson Ealdwine - Tekno
The Down Low (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3. You stayed active until the end.
Skill: 5/7. Your grammar gets a little iffy here and there. Run-on sentences are your main trespasses. Sometimes a well placed semi-colon can save the day in that regard.
You tend to gloss over some details that would really heighten the rp. Notably lines like: "The waitress gave him a look, probably..." While you explain the motivation behind it, you never mention what kind of look it is.
Battle: 3/5
The battle to capture Tyrogue was really short. Was there any particular reason as to why Tyson thought to capture it? I understand that Tyrogue and Chikorita both have a very limited moveset at this stage, but in lieu of flashier attacks, perhaps more detailed description would help.
As for the grimer battle, just remember that Yawn is a delayed sleep inducer, not an immediate one. I'm also a little sad that you introduced an NPC before the Muk had done anything. It would've been fun to see the lot of new trainers attempt such a challenge.
I'm curious as to the mechanics of Sand Stream. Is it something that is 'activated', or is it something that is automatic upon appearance on the field, like the games.
Final Score: 11/15
Koryu Hiroki - knil1
The Breakdown (click to showhide)
Participation: 1/3. You disappeared before any of the major events. Koryu led them to the restaurant, but never made it inside.
Skill: 4/7. At least in the beginning, we could see Koryu's relationship with his pokemon. Koryu's personality is also pretty easy to pick out as well, due to your writing. There is so much more I want to see coming out of rp posts though. Koryu really doesn't react to anything that happens around him
For the most part, the posts were pretty short.
Do me a favour, please? When beginning dialogue that is not a continuation of the character's first line, please separate it by one margin.
"Blah Blah Blah", said Koryu, then as an afterthought: "Blah Blah"
"Blah", replied Bob Loblaw. It's a very minor grammatical fix.
Final Tally: 5/15
Drei-Annie Cernei Tri - Xatu Breeder
The Rating (click to showhide)
Participation: 1/3 You disappeared before the major story events took place.
Skill: 3/7 Short posts across the board. Most of them dealt with her interactions with Finnegan. While I do love me some Nincada, I really would've liked to see Drei taking Finn's advice and actually socialize with the boys.
Minor note: Your sentence structure is almost always the same. In order to play with this, you may want to try simply varying up the clause order. You get "She did this. She did that. Drei did this. Drei did that." It's easy to follow, sure, but it gets monotonous
Minor note: "Every once in a while", not "Every once and a while". That really bugged me for some reason.
Battles: 0/5 No Battles, no points.
Final Tally: 4/15
Elizabeth Nadira Shir - Dragonwish2
The Scuttlebutt (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3 You joined late, but you stayed until the end.
Skill: 4/7 The thing about being off on your own for a good portion of the rp is that you have absolutely no one to play off of. You're forced to create and respond to all of your own stimuli. Therefore, your posts will undoubtedly be very short. Likewise, since you're off in your own little world, your fellow rpers have nothing to respond to as well. I might suggest finding a way to meet up with the main rp crew much faster next time.
There were several short posts towards the end that could have been collaborative posts between you and Pinsir.
I enjoy Liz's sense of humor, by the way.
Same deal with Knil1, new paragraph each time there is a different person speaking, please.
As a waiter myself, I felt some sympathy for Aleena.
Battle: 3/5 The battle with growlithe was two turns long. I know that this can be the case in the games, but I'd like to see that expounded upon in the roleplaying universe. The battle to capture Oreo was much, much better. While I enjoyed the flashback to the Friend Ball memory, I have to wonder why Liz didn't remember it when she was capturing greg.
Final Score: 10/15
Zach Schmidt - Pinsir
The Jazz (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3 You joined REALLY late, but hey, you stayed through the end.
Skill: 4/7 In your second post, Zach is already in a rage, but he seems to keep his cool during the battle. It's a little contradictory to me. You also switch between present and past tense here and there, so please be mindful of that.
There were several posts on the last page that could've been avoided by utilizing a collaborative post with Dragonwish.
Please be mindful of things like "The Houndour took advantage of this by taking a large bite of Blaze's tale..." Spellcheck doesn't catch homophones, so it may be wise to proofread your post before submitting it.
Battle: 4/5 The battles were pretty good. I like that Zach isn't completely set in his battle skills and still makes a rookie mistake here or there (notably the Flash Fire activation before Blaze's evolution).
Final Score: 11/15
Posted by: Living Arrow Mar 12 2011, 01:06 PM
Exploring Demalr Cave
Pibbler - Felisha Roke - 4 (click to showhide)
Pibbler - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=44813
So, despite having more than 15 posts, this RP did not meet the requirement to receive a full grading. I do, however, see that this was by no means within your control so have decided to make something of it, anyway.
Activity: 2/3 The full score was not given here due to the RP being so short.
Skill: 1/7 There was a near complate lack of description when it came to Felisha's surroundings, how she viewed her companions and there wasn't any sort of introduction for her character in her first post. You did, however, use a piece of decent internal dialogue (where Felisha thinks to herself) and correctly used itallics when doing so.
When writing from Terry the Shinx's point of view, you switched from the third person (he, she, it) to first person (I, me, my) which didn't seem to flow particularly well. In future, please only use the third person when writing your posts.
All posts were really short and lacked detail.
Battling: 1/5 The battle between Terry and Trouble had enough moves to be considered technically accurate for the capture to take place but lacked detail that would have gotten you more marks.
Total: 4/15
Since Master Houndoom and Umbrae Calamitas left the roleplay, their contributions will not be graded.
Ranch Sitters
Short but sweet, this roleplay was a pleasure to read. A shame luke39 dropped out after one post... but your scores have not suffered as a result. Clearly, Celino and Eron are a good team and I'm keen to see where they head next. As a pair, you were pretty even in my grading so I've lumped you together in the spoiler.
Cavalcade / Ganymede - Celino Molenaro / Eron Ingress - 14 / 14 (click to showhide)
Cavalcade - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=39635
Ganymede -http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=42644
Activity: 3/3 Nothing to say here
Skill: 7/7 Both of you had me hooked after each post and I never felt like anything was missing. Both kept to profile and each character never seemed like they were running out of place. Smooth transitions between posts, appropriate responses to one another and really well thought-out dialogue. As far as skill goes, it will always be questionable to try and get any marks off either of you
A big plus for me, you used Team Deception perfectly.
eight points to gryffindor!Battling: 4/5 A bit of a traditionalist, I always like to see a standard portion of attack-calling from both pro- and antagonists across a makeshift battlefield or at least a standard battle between two Pokemon even if their trainers aren't around. That said, the pieces of battles that were written were well done and sufficiently controlled so I didn't end up thinking things like "Hey! shouldn't Shep be unconscious by now?" or "Heck, Blue is a God!"
Total: 14/15
Posted by: FirePower Apr 4 2011, 07:49 PM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=52905&st=0 Has been completed.
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=52049&st=0&p=1646213&#entry1646213-FirePower
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=52373-Jansen
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=37846&st=0&p=1068667&#entry1068667-luke39
Plot:A bug pokemon reserve near Artho town had been recently plagued with the mysterious disappearance of several tagged pokemon. In hopes to discover the source of the problem, the head researcher, Professor Peyton, decides to hire a few trainers to follow three pokemon around the reserve for a few hours and see what happens. After a while, some men in lab coats come and try to steal the weedle James was following, the Sewwadle Willow was following, and the caterrpie Kaya was following. Even though each of the scientists lost in a pokemon battle, they made off with said pokemon. The three of them ran after the thieves, eventually losing them when coming to a cave guarded by three deception grunts. After sneaking past the guards, they go though the cave until coming to a large chamber with a few more deception grunts. After beating the criminals in a battle, the trio learns that most of the pokemon have already been shipped to Deception HQ and the bad guys had pulled off by posting spies disguised as scientists in the facility. Eventually the bad guys got away, though they left behind two smoke balls, which went to Willow and James. After freeing the remaining bug pokemon, They went back to the building and told their story. As a reward for helping the scientists, Kaya, James, and Willow each got twenty dollars and were allowed to catch a pokemon on the reserve. After leaving, the three of them decided travel together to Barley.
Posted by: Kamaitachi Apr 5 2011, 02:24 AM
Banished Bugs:
With no real exposition, it’s kind of hard for the reader to follow what’s going on right away. If I hadn’t read the synopsis from your RP Grading post, I would’ve had no idea what was going on.
It’s a very battle heavy roleplay, which is okay. I would’ve liked to have seen more interaction between the three of you. It’s hard to believe that you became fast friends when you hardly talked to one another.
Overall, not a bad rp. There’s plenty of room for improvement, so I hope you guys do!
FirePower:
Your Score (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3 You were active. Good job by you!
Skill: 3/7 Watch your sentences; you do tend to err in favour of run-on sentences. You have some nice detail here and there, however, you introduce Kaya and Manera with no exposition whatsoever. Exposition needn’t be lengthy, but you through us into the story right off the bat. It isn’t even in media res, (err…in the middle of action), so it didn’t make sense for such an abrupt start.
When a new character begins speaking, please denote as such by starting a new paragraph.
Your posts are pretty short. It needn’t be overtly lengthy, but I feel like there’s a lot more you could be showing with Kaya.
I don’t like how easily Kaya’s NPC namedrops Team Deception. This doesn’t affect your score, but Team Deception doesn’t really make the news that often. That’s more in the realm of Cult of Darkrai or the Sons of Lenoilia.
Watch the all caps. It’s silly.
Battles: 3/5 Even with a special ball, Flit only hit Pede-erpat once before it was captured. I would’ve liked to see a little more of the battle for that, especially since the Venipede knows Twineedle. The Scratch/Tackle battle between Flare and Pineco was fun to read.
Total: 9/15
Jansen:
Your Grade (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3 You kept going. Well done!
Skill: 6/7 You present Willow very nicely. Not overly done, but you do show us a good portion of what’s going on her mind. It’s a nice touch.
Be careful! You have a habit of switching tenses randomly. Try to stay in the past tense, as that’s the most commonly used tense. It also wouldn’t make sense as to use the wrong tense whilst everyone else is using the correct one.
Minor note: Watch “it’s” versus “its”. It’s a common mistake, so I’m not docking any points.
Battles: 5/5 Despite it being a tackle-only battle, it was nice to see you put some effort into the detail of it. It was certainly better than what I’d come up with. Your scientist battles were well written, despite limited movesets.
Total: 14/15
Luke39:
Your Rating (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3 You stayed to the end. Congrats!
Skill: 3/7 I see you’re attempting to write some detailed sentences, however, you tend to step into the realm of run-on sentences. Punctuation is your best friend here, especially commas and semi-colons. Small grammatical errors abounded as well, but you’re making them less frequently, which is a sign of improvement.
I would suggest working on your dialogue. When I read your speech, I assume that James and every NPC is a robot, simply because their sentence structure isn’t,..well…normal. While it’s grammatically fine, it would be a nice nuance to add things such as contractions, or even some flavouring. Yzarc Drowsman and Tymid are great rpers to study if you’re looking to naturalize your characters’ speech.
For instance:
“Hello again James, you are our third helper. Please take a seat and try to make some new friends.”
It’s a simple fix: “Hello again, James. You’re our third helper, so please take a seat and try to make some new friends.”
Please note as to when something is plural and when something is possessive. “They use their flashing manes” versus “They use their flashing mane’s.” The latter example implies that the mane is in possession of something, because lengthened it becomes: “They use their flashing mane is” which is very incorrect.
Be mindful of when you’re narrating and when you’re speaking as Kara. A few times you used “us” rather than “them” in the narration, and it kind of threw me off guard.
Battles: 3/5 It’s kind of hard to give you points for the Metapod battle, simply because the Metapod did nothing but harden. At least you played around with Frost a bit. Your battle with the Scientist was a bit better, and the battle was Joltik seemed a bit more exciting too. You’ve been improving here too.
Total: 9/15
Good work guys!
Posted by: Kamaitachi Apr 12 2011, 11:45 PM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=50434&st=0 is complete.
Dramatis Personae:
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=37696 - Played by Kamaitachi
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=42633 - Played by Tymid
Otis of Arasam - Played by Bogart, then recast and played by Living Arrow
Summary:
Tag and Raven, fresh off of their ordeal in "When Crime Pays" spend the day in Arasam. Raven ends up purchasing a blind shiny Vulpix, whom she names A Capella. The two discuss Raven's past a bit, and it's revealed to the masses that Raven has been spotted in Arasam, drawing the attention of many people. Tag goes on to challenge the gym, earning himself an Emberwing badge. The duo leave Arasam.
This is mostly something of a set-up for the next rp. At least, it wasn't that way at first, but it totally is now.
Things of Consequence:
Raven acquires a Shiny, Blind Vulpix
Tag's Kyoko evolves into a Bellossom
Tag wins the Emberwing badge.
Tada.
Posted by: 2gamers Apr 17 2011, 05:55 PM
Toddle Tale: Review of “Arasam, That Toddling Town”
A very good RP from start to finish. In this RP, we see Tag and Raven getting closer to each other, without interference from kids and TD members :P. Let’s move on, shall we?
Taggarty Lee- Kamaitachi (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
Skill: 7/7
This RP is another example of how tough guy Tag doesn’t want to be alone without a few friends around. Though he’s usually introverted around others, Tag is much more social around Raven and his pokemon. The contrast makes for a good weekend read.
Battle: 5/5
As a charizard fanboy, I can’t say I enjoyed seeing one of my favorites getting beaten by a nidorino. But it was handled well.
Total: 15/15
Raven Amaranth- Tymid (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
Skill: 7/7
I like how Raven acts tough but then melts like butter when around Tag or around cute disabled pokemon. Like Tag, I like the contrast. And yet, they bond with their similarities. It’s as if you planned this from the start :P.
Battle: 5/5
Learning how to command deaf and blind pokemon was a nice insight. Perhaps the vibrations Raven used to communicate with Forte could be used for some rudimentary Morse code for more complicated communication.
You probably could have used another battle. Perhaps a crazy paparazzi could try and keep Raven from running with his pokemon's use of Mean Look or Block. As he took pictures at his own leisure, Raven's wrath is incurred. Cue battle. Something to think about for next time.
Total: 15/15
Posted by: Proby Apr 22 2011, 04:39 AM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=32208 has [finally] come to an end.
(V E R Y) B R I E F C O U R S E O F E V E N T S
This RP follows the course of events from Port Barley to Fidona, where Alex and Tikal have their gym battles (Tyson was meant to, but never did.) There are plenty of events occurring, such as a lot of activity on the boat and even more as we reach Fidona.
C H A R A C T E R S
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=18464- Proby
Thttp://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=34660&view=findpost&p=1055636- Proby
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=17616- rt117
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=26159- Protoman
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=31217 (Now an dead profile)- Metal Nate
P R O B L E M S
Metal Nate left the RP quite early, and soon was cleared out in the Great Purge anyway. We tried to do this nicely, but saying they didn't notice that he hadn't left the boat.
Protoman, who we are desperately hoping will come back, has apparently, if I am correct, has password issues with both his Gts+ account and Yahoo mail, meaning there is no way of contacting him. He left just before we launched into the gym battles and hasn't come back since.
O T H E R N O T E S
Have Fun reading!
Posted by: Tymid Apr 22 2011, 03:21 PM
In The Jungle, the Mighty Jungle Grading
Alex Slasher and Tom Hawk-Proby (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
Hooray, you participated!
Skill: 5/7
Your posts were good, especially towards the beginning, but as I was reading, it seemed as though you were getting a little lazy with them in terms of description and grammatical correctness. You still managed to keep the story together, but next time, try to keep the energy that you put into the beginning of your posts throughout the entire RP.
Battle: 4/5
Your description of the battle with Maxi was admirable, but I would have liked to see more from your other battles. I can tell you've got it in your head, now you just need to write it out.
Total: 12/15
Tikal Faylen-rt117 (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
Skill: 6/7
Good posts overall, but considering I've seen your writing style, I'm going to say the same thing I said to Proby: Don't get lazy just because it's the end of the RP. Whether or not it's dragged on forever, you and your character still need to have the same amount of energy you started with.
What I do, in that situation, is I go back a reread the RP, and put myself in the position of my character. I find that posts are WAY easier to come up with when I've hit a doldrum or writer's block.
Also, there were quite a few grammatical errors, but everyone makes those. Just be careful in the future.
Battle: 5/5
You battled and stuff. Good quality battles, although I feel there could be a wee bit more description.
Total: 14/15
Tyson Parker-Protoman (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 2/3
You almost made it to the end. Almost.
Skill: 3/7
Yet again, I'm seeing more "lazy" posting here. One of your posts had only 4 sentences. I'm a firm believer in quality over quantity, but in a role play, there has got to be some sort of substance. If you don't know what to say, no biggie! Just post in the discussion thread that you want to be skipped. I've done it loads of times.
Another reason your grade suffered here is because there were loads of grammatical errors. Little things like run on sentences and lack of capitalization can KILL your grade. I look over little things like that a lot of times, but when it's a constant in almost every post, I sadly have to dock points. Just try to be more careful.
Battle: 4/5
You battled, but the battles were lacking in description and quality. Next time, try to really get into your character's heads. It really does help.
Total: 9/15
I can't really grade Metal Nate's one post; most I could give him was a 1 in skill for the post that he wrote. If he decides to come back, he can have that one point.
It was a good read, guys! Don't take my advice in a negative manner, please. I've watched all of you RP before, and the advice I give is simply to help.
Posted by: 2gamers Apr 27 2011, 06:25 AM
Lopsided Leviathan of Languid Lenoilia is finally complete!
http://pane.wikia.com/wiki/Pandora_%22Pan%22_Gibbs- 2gamers
http://pane.wikia.com/wiki/Douken_Sota- Douken Sota
http://pane.wikia.com/wiki/Justin_Smart/Nate Guzman- Yzarc Drowsnam
In 4L, Pan and Douken arrive in Lenoilia, which had been briefly taken over by a biker gang. With the help of Justin Smart and Nate Guzman, they set out to overthrow the gang and set things right in Lenoilia. The twist: the biker gang was put in power by Team Deception as an experiment to test the power of a shadow pokemon. Knowing this, Justin and Nate continue to help Pan and Douken, risking their careers and possibly their lives. Everything ends happily, but Justin’s abrupt exit leaves Pan a bit heartbroken.
A few notes:
1. All bunnying was done with approval.
2. Concept of shadow zoroark was approved by Bogart
Posted by: Tymid Apr 28 2011, 10:47 PM
OKAY. Sorry this took so ridiculously long. I just finished my finals. Woo! Figured I'd get this done before I move. Boo. If you have any questions, please PM me. Thank y'all for a good read!
Pandora Gibbs-2Gamers (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
YOU DID A PARTICIPATE. Good job.
Skill: 7/7
Entry post was a great eye-catcher. I love journal entries. As per usual, your style of writing is fun to read. Maybe it's because I do the same thing with Raven, but I love to see good-quality interactions between Poke'mon and trainer. It's a very good way to show us who you and your poke'mon are. Well done.
Battle: 5/5
Good battle scenes. Again, good balance between what the poke'mon is thinking and what the trainer is planning, while still allowing an aura of "Oh! What's going to happen?"
I like it.
Total: 15/15
Justin and Nate, the POWER SQUAD-Yzarc Drowsnam (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
A wild participation appeared! Yzarc used a Master Ball! SUCCESS.
Skill: 7/7
You, out of all the RPers I've encountered, possess the greatest skill with dialogue. It's hard not to make dialogue seem too overbearing, but you've successfully turned it into your trademark...and it is an art form. Very well done.
Battle: 5/5
You have a knack for making battles almost humorous, even in the most dire of circumstances. Again, I love the way you write during battles. I really have no negative comments, here.
Total: 15/15
Douken Sota-Douken Sota (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
You also managed to participate! Yay!
Skill: 4/7
...Okay. Please don't be offended when I say this. Some of your posts sound...lazy. Like, you realize it's your turn and you simply throw something together for the sake of posting and being active. Was there a good bit of detail involved in most of them? Yes. However, the way they were put together made them slightly difficult to read.
Also, there's the matter of being a courteous roleplayer. None of your fellow roleplayers should have to even contemplate changing their previous posts because you edited yours later. It disrupts the storyline and is frustrating to those around you.
THAT BEING SAID, you've improved from the roleplays I've seen you in in the past. Your score suffered mainly because of the lackadaisical posting style, and because of mildly discourteous posting. Don't think I hate you or anything, please.
Battle: 5/5
You battled, and it was good. I could stand to see a little bit more detail and clarity, but other than that, I saw no problems.
Total: 12/15
Posted by: Angels Fall First May 11 2011, 04:14 PM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=52976
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=52942
Characters and Casts:
- http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=52896 played by Angels Fall First
- http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=52867 played by Kamaitachi
Summary:
Finn missed his boat ride to the mainland. As he is waiting on a bench he meets Cesc, who is running and errand for his aunt and uncle. As any other trainer would, Finn asks for a battle. He gets a bit frustrated with his Pokemon and the battle gets cut short thanks to a raging bull.
Things get solved and cleared up in the end.
Posted by: 2gamers May 14 2011, 10:33 PM
The Cow Goes Moo: Review of “Going Bovine”
It meets the posting length, but I think the RP could have lasted a bit longer. Their interactions were a bit limited, but still pretty good. Let’s see what we can do.
Francesco “Cesc” Rojas- Kamaitachi (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
Skill: 6/7
The highlight of the RP was when Cesc called Finn out on yelling at his pokemon. Even when reprimanding his opponent, Cesc remained calm (but firm). My only complaint would be that I wished there were more opportunities to show off Cesc. It was a very battle-centric RP; I would have liked to have seen more stuff off the arena. He could have toured the various boutiques of Barley for ideas on popular fashions in Furoh. Perhaps he could have gotten past initial differences with Finn.
Battle: 4/5
The second battle could have been longer, especially since it was the main event of the RP. Maybe the tauros could have been running around all over Barley, with the two trainers having to put aside their tension from their battle to rein the bull in.
Total: 13/15
Finn Oakley- Angels Fall First (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
Skill: 6/7
We see Finn’s calm clash with his desire to win, at his pokemon’s expense. We don’t see PC characters abuse pokemon too often (even if this is a less extreme case). Kudos on that
. It was a nice change of pace, but before we get to see a real discussion between the two trainers, they’re swept into another battle, followed by the ending. I really wanted to see more interaction outside of battle.
Battle: 4/5
Same as Kamai. Seriously, there should have been a scene inside a china shop, where the two are trying to avoid breaking things while battling the tauros in the store. So much potential for “going bovine”. It’s a shame the RP was cut so short.
Total: 13/15
Posted by: Fei Fei Jun 12 2011, 11:32 AM
After a massively long delay, http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=15941&st=0 has decidedly been declared as dead (after discussing it with Duck Tape and Charlie Piers). Honestly, I'm not sure if it can even be graded anymore since both Charlie and Duck's characters have been moved to the Dead Profile archive (though both have expressed interest in reviving their characters), and because it's so old, but I just wanted to get it up here so that Alex could have some closure for it, so that she can move on to another RP.
Players Include:
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=12400
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=12726 (Dead Profile)
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=12877 (Dead Profile)
Important Events:
Dynh's caterpie CC evolved into a poor, abused Metapod-turned-football.
Alex and Dynh battled, and Dynh proved that not every trainer instinctively knows what moves their pokemon can learn.
Kuchi, Alex's new Mawile, was a smug bastard.
Dynh captured a Feebas almost by accident.
An angry Gyarados attacked the troupe.
Alex almost drowned, and Ouji was a BAMF.
Posted by: Arcyena Jun 12 2011, 05:14 PM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=53881 has been inactive for a very long time now, and I'm pretty certain that the only other RPer from me who was posting in it has vanished from the site. Since the RP has 24 posts, I understand that it is eligible for grading.
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=15331 (http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=9558&view=findpost&p=365715) - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showuser=44281
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=53793 (http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=9558&st=35) - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showuser=72518
Summary: Chris and DC happen to meet each other at a small pond south of Arasam, both trainers hoping to find a valuable Water-Type Pokémon to fill a vital role in their teams. The two soon get to talking, however, the conversation is interrupted when Chris hooks a Sharpedo of all things, quite the phenomenon when one considers a Sharpedo's usual habitat. After a tussle with the shark-like Pokémon, resulting in Chris' wire snapping, the two are relieved to find that the Sharpedo has vanished from sight, and opt to take a gentle swim to relax a little, not to mention allow the previously calm ambiance to restore itself to the pond, in order to make future catches more likely. However, the two still find themselves being interrupted by another pair of trainers, seemingly keen on making sure that their relationship-status was know to the world, one of them with their eyes set on Chris' Houndoor, intending to purchase the Dark-Fire Canine from the Hoenn-born male, both the Pokémon and her trainer not really too fond of this idea. An argument soon breaks out, escalating into a double battle between them, which DC and Chris win relatively comfortably, resulting in the intimate pair blaming all but themselves as they leave Chris and DC to attempt to carry on with their fishing.
Posted by: Kamaitachi Jun 12 2011, 10:50 PM
Cliffhanger! Angry Gyarados is still Red!
So, it's incomplete, obviously. I can't rightly give you full marks for them.
Alex Treinem (click to showhide)
Participation: 2/3
You stayed until the end? Well. You disappeared for a few months, then tried to stay until the end. At least you put it up for grading.
Skill: 7/7
Alex is a very, very interesting character to read. Not as interesting as Dynh, per se, but still very compelling. I like her relationship with her pokemon, as well as her attempt at getting to know Kuchi better. It's atypical, but it proves to be a fun read. Your posts were good and descriptive, among the best I've seen here at PANE.
Battles: 3/5
I can't very well give you full marks with only one real battle. However, the internal monologue that Kuchi kept, as well as Alex figuring out how to work with her was definitely a new angle into battles that I particularly enjoyed.
Total: 12/15
The Others (click to showhide)
Mercedes Dorian: 7/15
Dynh Ariani: 7/15
If they ever come back to Pane, I'll let them claim these points.
Go Fish! It's your turn!This was also incomplete, so again, I can't feel compelled to give you full marks.
Christopher Portnoy (click to showhide)
I'm glad to see that your character shares nothing in common with the eponymous character in "Portnoy's Complaint". I would've been a bit disturbed.
Participation: 2/3 It's incomplete, but you stayed to the end of its incompletion
Skill: 7/7 You're an excellent roleplayer, providing Chris with a very rich inner life, as well as acting quite logically and still in character.
Battle: 3/5 You had one major battle under your belt, and it was quite excellently done. I have no criticisms for it. I'm sure there would've been more battle had you finished the roleplay.
Total: 12/15
DC Moriarty (click to showhide)
Participation: 1/3 You didn't quite stay until the end.
Skill: 7/7 I'm so happy that I got to read for two very skilled roleplayers. It made for a very compelling read. I wish you'd stuck around.
Battle: 3/5 Same as Arcyena
Total: 11/15
Had this roleplay completed, I would've had no qualms giving either of you perfect marks. If Red Kitten returns to PANE, she's welcome to pick up her points from here.
Posted by: LittleShadowPokemon Jun 18 2011, 01:10 AM
Scarily close to a year, http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=43750&st=0 has finally come to an end.
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=16100 - LittleShadowPokemon
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=40783 - SaphireShadows
Vincent Waters - Pumpkin King ....Archived.
Plot Summary:
Deciding to travel to Fidona together, Vincent and Joey board the S.S. Starlight Cruise ship and enjoy themselves. Before they reach their destination however, Joey meets a young girl by the name of Twila Reanne. They end up battling with Kimiko the Igglybuff versus Merle the Makuhita. As things got too heated for the baby Pokemon, Joey recalled her and forfeited the first round. Next, it was Babylon the Eevee versus Mai the Ralts. While both sides used some good strategies, Babylon ran back to his trainer and returned himself to his Pokeball after getting hit square on with a brutal Psychic attack. After a quick game of chase, Joey consented to get to know Twila better and during their conversation time, the boat strikes a wall of nesting Corsola who were having problems of their own. Problems with very sharp teeth.
Important Happenings:
The boat ends up docking at Petropolis.
Joey is now wheelchair bound, temporarily.
He has also lost his hearing, not so temporarily.
My apologies in advance for forgetting anything.
Posted by: Living Arrow Jun 18 2011, 04:06 AM
RP Grading – 20,000 Corsola Under The Sea
General Notes
Two introverted characters on a boat. Two characters unsure of their futures as trainers on a boat. Two characters… with awesome Roleplayers! Below are your grades (apologies for the wait) and I think you both deserve every point. I had been following this roleplay for a while and it’s not my first time grading you both either so I’m pleased to see you both taking on board comments from before and am keen to see Darryn or Lori come your way. ^__^
I love little Joey and Twila. They are a little naïve when it comes to being a trainers but they
are beginners and it’s great to see that you haven’t lost sight of that just yet. Though, with the way they’re progressing, I’m sure Badges/Ribbons/Medals/Fame will be on their way soon!
Great use of PMs for your battle and everything was well written for the entire roleplay.
LSP –Joey J Sweet (click to showhide)
Activity: 3/3
Skill: 6/7 You tell Joey’s history brilliantly and I’m never really given chance to forget why he is in Furoh or why he has such determination to succeed in his training career, whatever he decides to choose!
I had a major quibble with his following of a random Raticate into the sea without knowing what was going on. I know he’s out for adventure but without telling anyone where he was going etc I felt that his character was slipping because of the exciting plotline you got going. And then when he thought something other than the ship was bothering the Corsola… I didn’t see where he found that reasoning (maybe I am blind and missed something) and thought that maybe finding the Sharpedo would have made a more effective shock for the reader rather than warning us something else was on its way prematurely. Only some minor issues so only 1 point docked.
Battling: 5/5
Joey did some great battling in this roleplay. I liked his respectful recall of Kimiko when battling Merle and frustration with Babylon when the Eevee gave up on battling. Some of the ideas he had using Kimiko and Claw to defend against the Sharpedo were good, too.
Total: 14/15
SS – Twila Reanne (click to showhide)
Activity: 3/3
Skill: 7/7 Twila’s speech, to me, is a bit easy-going for a shy girl but somehow Twila pulls it off. I liked the way you showed off her mix of inexperience and confidence with familiar actions (diving) without making it seem like she was being unrealistic with her actions. You paid great attention to detail from the reactions of the other people on the boat during the “issues” that they were being faced with and I was happy to see her character kept to throughout.
Battling: 4/5
The only battle for Twila was between herself and Joey but it was written perfectly. I only docked 1 point because she didn’t get to battle later on in the roleplay.
Total: 14/15
Thanks,
~LA
Posted by: FirePower Jun 22 2011, 08:45 AM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=53926 has been completed.
Xepidental as http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=37846&st=0&p=1068667&#entry1068667 (left)
Jansen as http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=52373(left)
Asterna as http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=53843&st=0&p=1721927&#entry1721927
FirePower as http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=52049&st=0&p=1646213&#entry1646213
IMPORTANT EVENTS
*Willow, James, and Kaya arrive in Port Barley and decide to eat in a pizzeria
*Rose arrives, goes to the same restaurant as the others, and joins their group.
*James sees a pokeathalon poster
*Kaya meets Luke
*A double battle is proposed, but it never got started. RP turned in for people dropping out and inactivity.
Posted by: 2gamers Jun 22 2011, 06:48 PM
I'll take it, but since we're running an event, this will be delayed.
Posted by: Tekno Jun 26 2011, 06:37 AM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=50605&view=findpost&p=1581399 is now finished. This time the group heads to the Safari Zone to get some of them Pokémon. After the trip they decide to grab something to eat at the restaurant, only to get rudely interrupted by a group of rich teenagers. Simple plot, everybody made it to the end except DJSanders who disappeared during the final battles.
The cast:
Tekno - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=37863 (http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=9558&view=findpost&p=361834)
Dragonwish2 - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=46005 (http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=9558&view=findpost&p=1399982)
Pinsir - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=33720 (http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=9558&view=findpost&p=912714)
DJSanders - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=4608&pid=1579546&st=0&#entry1579546 (http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=9558&view=findpost&p=1579602)
Pokefan209 - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=45436&st=0&p=1375426&#entry1375426 (http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=9558&view=findpost&p=1379411)
Noteworthy events:
- Liz catches a Zorua
- Zach catches a Sandile and a Rufflet
- Kenz catches a Tropius
- David catches a Snivy
- Tyson catches an Elekid
- Tyson's Chikorita evolves into a Bayleef
- The gang makes a bunch of rich kids going back crying to their mommies!
Posted by: Kamaitachi Jun 26 2011, 08:02 AM
The Wild Chills and Thrills of the Safari
I , for one, have difficulty in writing up very long posts, so I understand. However, I noted that a majority of the posts are fairly short. Oftentimes, they fall within the realm of a few sentences. It doesn't hurt to add descriptions, rather than glaze things along for the sake of posting, or for the sake of moving things along. Sometimes, we, the readers, like to enjoy the moments, rather than being rushed through them.
Part of what it was is that many of you posts too frequently. Sometimes it's better to wait for everyone to post before you make your next statement, thereby giving you more things to respond to, and thus elongating your posts. It makes things flow easier that way, and you can fit several lines of dialogue in, rather than simply performing a single action and saying a single line.
Continuing on this trend, each of you have some wonderful moments of personal characterization. The drawback is, with such short posts, we really don't get to see more of it. You, the roleplayers, simply state something either as a thought or as a narrative sidebar, and never really give examples of exactly how the character portrays this. For instance: David Anderson parting with Charmander for the first time. It's merely a blip, and it's not really mentioned anymore in that post. We don't get to see how nervous or anxious he is without his dearest pokemon.
When your posts do get longer, they're definitely more enjoyable to read. There are so many little details that I could pick up from people, which increased the enjoyment tenfold.
Since you each only had one battle, I can't rightly give you full marks for your battle scores. But they were well done, and nice to see people playing with type disadvantages.
Tekno - Tyson Ealdwine
Your Grade (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3
Skill: 6/7 Kudos for being the thread-runner on this rp. Wrangling four other roleplayers is not exactly an easy task, and you performed it well.
Battle: 4/5
Total: 13/15
Dragonwish2 - Elizabeth Nadira Shir
Your Score (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3
Skill: 5/7
Battle: 4/5
Total: 12/15
Pinsir - Zach Schmidt
Your Marks (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3
Skill: 5/7
Battle: 4/5
Total: 12/15
DJSanders - David Anderson
Just so you know, on occasion, you'd refer to Gator as 'Crock'. I'm wondering if this was intentional?
Your Outcome (click to showhide)
Participation: 2/3 You didn't stay until the end. Boo you!
Skill: 3/7
Battle: 1/5 You got bunnied during the battle. Aw bum.
Total: 6/15
Pokefan209 - Kenz Issone
Be careful, your posts are very short, and it doesn't let us know too much about how Kenz reacts to her surroundings.
Your Tally (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3
Skill: 4/7 There is a huge difference between 'there', 'their' and 'they're'. They're problematic for most people, but it's something you should try and keep in mind. Spellcheck doesn't catch homophones ever.
Battle: 3/5
Total: 10/15
Other than my few criticisms, this was pretty nice. It's great to see everyone improving more and more with each roleplay. Keep it up!
Posted by: 2gamers Jul 3 2011, 11:35 AM
Review of “Wonders of Port Barley” With Bonus Musical Short!
The Wonders of Port Barley,
The surfers are totally gnarly.
We’ll all comb the beach while we sing Bob Marley,
The Wonders of Port Barley!
*jazz hands*
There’s not much to work with in this RP. Much of it consisted of ordering pizza and not much else. Had this RP continued with the two remaining members, you could have received more points. The double battle could have happened off-screen, with James and Willow going off to explore the Pokeathlon afterwards. This leaves Kaya and Rose to explore…wait for it…the wonders of Port Barley
! They could have explored the shops and beaches together, perhaps developing a good friendship. For a twist, one or both of them would run out of money; how would they continue their adventure? Luckily, there was a newbie tournament taking place on the beach. Grand prize was…enough cash to start a journey! Kaya and Rose could have entered and eventually had to face each other. That battle would decide the winner, but rather than one girl taking the money for herself, the two would share it and continue their adventures together. That would have been a pretty god way to continue and receive much more points.
As it stands, I’ll see what I can do.
James Stanley- Xpedential (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 2/3.
Though you were posting, you also departed. Being the thread starter, your departure killed the RP.
Skill: 5/7.
You had some punctuation/spelling trouble that made a few posts a bit difficult to understand. Try making posts in a word processor to avoid such mistakes. I could have used more description on the city and the pizza shop, but your posts were pretty sufficient in length and had more detail than most. Too bad you left, you were starting to improve
Battle: 0/5. No battles, no points.
Total: 7/15 Willow Deacon- Jansen (click to showhide)
Total: 3/15
You made three posts and left. That’s really not enough to grade. I went ahead and gave you the minimal amount. I will say that your posts were great. I liked Willow’s reaction upon seeing her “old friend”.
Rose Fiore- Asterna (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
Skill: 7/7
This was a great debut for Rose. Right from the first post, we were able to see what kind of person Rose was. There was a lot of content. You’re off to a great start
Battle: 0/5
Again, no battles, no points.
Total: 10/15 Kaya Rovera- FirePower (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
Skill: 3/7
You were a very prolific poster. Unfortunately, that was part of the problem of your very short posts. It doesn’t hurt to wait for someone else to post if you have nothing to say. It would have helped if you had added more description of the scenery. The smells and sights of the city and pizza shop would have been a good opportunity to show off some skill. Perhaps for next time.
I really didn’t like Luke’s intro into the group. It felt like Kaya simply grabbed a random person off the street and had him join the party. I can only guess that his story was to be expanded upon had the RP not died. Right now though, it was a rushed action just to get another trainer for a double match.
Battle: 0/5
See others for details
Total: 6/15
Posted by: Angels Fall First Jul 9 2011, 10:04 PM
On the Edge of the Ocean
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=55896&st=0
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=55285
Stranded in Fidona still, Finnley has been not having the time of his life as he would have thought. First he misses his kick, second, which isn't really a bad thing, he meets a woman, and third he gets attacked by fish. The woman he meets is Jill, and he begins a good relationship with her right away. She offers to buy him food and their night goes quickly by as they finish off with dinner and head their separate ways.
But they soon meet back up again, when Finn is attacked by wild Carvanhas. With the help of Jill and her two Pokemon, Pele and Vinyl, along with a wild Krabby and Finn's Torchic, Nihall, who evolves into a Combusken, they defeat the raging fish. Right after the pairs part again, with each leaving an imprint in the other, even if they didn't intend on it.
CAST:
Finn Oakley - Angels Fall First - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=52896|http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=9558&view=findpost&p=1680746
Jill Laurent - Yzarc Drowsnam - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=55787|http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=9558&view=findpost&p=1821826
Posted by: Kamaitachi Jul 10 2011, 01:02 AM
Sur le bord de l'océan
Finnley Oakley/Angels Fall First (click to showhide)
Participation: All the way through? Fantastic. 3/3
Skill: A majority of your posts are a little on the short side. I'd appreciate just a touch more details here and there, concerning actions, appearances and thought processes.
You tend to follow the same sentence structure with each sentence. No points were docked for this, but it'd be nice to see you vary it up from "He did this. Finn did this. She did this. Finn then did this." 5/7
Battle: There was only the battle with the pair of Carvanha, but it was pretty good. Perhaps since the Krabby is such a warrior, it may have wanted to battle before being so easily captured. 4/5
Total: 12/15
Jill Laurent/Yzarc Drowsnam (click to showhide)
Participation: You finished? Me too! 3/3
Skill: Sans bias on my part, you've once again brought us a very compelling character with both a rich inner life and very distinct dialogue. I'm enjoying Jill, and associate more with her and her losses in life very nicely. 7/7
Battle: Only one battle, and Jill didn't really do all that much in it. I'm loathe to do this, but we all know that POKEMON ARE BATTLE HARDENED WARRIORS WHO FIGHT MERCILESSLY. 4/5
Total: 14/15
Thanks you two!
Posted by: Master Houndoom Aug 22 2011, 12:59 AM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=55259 is now finished!
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=54923's grandfather calls her up, reporting to her that his glameow, Aurora, was pokénapped! At the Pokécenter, she (literally) ran into http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=50054, a young lady with the odd predicament of being roughly half normal size. The pair had barely collided when http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=52867 also collided - with the ground - on his way to make a delivery in Port Barley. The three agree to work together to recover Aurora, and, after a confrontation with the kidnappers, split up to follow two different leads. Cesc and Branwys encounter the kidnappers and rescue Aurora, and take her to Terra's grandfather. That night, they enjoy a little dinner and a little romance, opening possibilities by exchanging phone numbers... or DID they?!
(Please note: Terra's player pulled out of PANE in the middle of the RP. It was continued by Branwys' and Cesc's players, hence the split.)
Posted by: Kamaitachi Aug 22 2011, 03:44 AM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=56309&st=0 is also over, meaning both of my PANE characters are up for grading at the same time!!!
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=37696 is searching for Raven Amaranth after they split up, heading over to a circus where he believes she is. http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=53383 attempts to make his Contest Circuit debut, but doesn't have enough pokemon. He winds up taking up a small gig at the same circus. Naturally, http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=10528 also happens to take a gig at the circus, but he's working security.
So, Tag and Justin separately stumble across a Move Master, teaching both of their pokemon several new combat techniques. Tag also stumbles across a very familiar Seviper, but then finds Justin and Nate, causing Tag to realize that this is the same Seviper from "Operation Wounded Snake", where they all first met.
Tag is talked out of a fight, and ends up attempting to rescue some of the pokemon there, capturing a Slowpoke in the process. Meanwhile, Justin and Nate work their security gig for Seiccan's show.
Tag and Seiccan bump into one another, and start a fight. Things get out of hand when the man who had guarded the Slowpoke appears, and then proceed to get more out of hand when Justin appears.
After dispersing once more, Tag attempts to rescue the Seviper, somewhat aided by Seiccan, but they're ultimately thwarted by Justin. In lieu of fighting, (well, major fighting), they talk it over (sorta). A peaceful, non-violent solution in reached, and all three head their separate ways again.
Posted by: 2gamers Aug 28 2011, 12:54 PM
Review of “A Tale of Two Kitties”
It was the best of kitties; it was the worse of kitties… Yeah, I went there.
I have to admit, once Bronze Charizard left, I thought this RP was written off. Luckily, you two managed to finish the job and rather well. Enough of the chit-chat, let’s begin.
Terra Hunter- Bronze Charizard (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 2/3.
Well, you left in the middle.
Skill: 5/7.
A great effort on your part. I liked your pokemons’ reactions (such as Redsky’s reaction to Cesc’s sneasel). Some of those posts could have been a little longer.
Battle: 3/5.
A little more description would have helped a bit.
Total: 10/15
Francesco Rojas- Kamaitachi (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
Skill: 7/7
I really liked how Cesc was completely oblivious both to Brawny’s figure and to the larger mission. He’s very easily distracted when it comes to his wares and his pokemon. Nice execution. My only little quip was sudden proposal to ask Brawnys out. It may have been a subtle realization, but I never read whether Cesc realized Brawnys was a young woman (at least before the dinner).
Battle: 5/5
Varied moves and tactics, no domination of the enemy. Nicely done
Total: 15/15
Brawnys Muphenz (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
Skill: 7/7
A wonderful debut RP for Brawnys! We see every aspect of her profile displayed here in great detail. From her engineering skills to her displeasure of being treated like a kid, it’s all here. We also see her desires for love, with dates likely rare for her considering her condition. Everything’s good here.
Battle: 5/5
I’m lazy so see Kamai’s comments.
Total: 15/15
Posted by: Living Arrow Aug 29 2011, 06:23 AM
Review of “Par-Tay in Gigarte”
The whole Tag/Justin/Nate combo gets me every time - LOVE it. I've not had any exposure to Douken's secondary character, Seiccan, before but it's clear that he'll be a fast-rising star in our PANE community. Below are your scores but I can make it easy for you and just say: "Holy crap! Well done!"
Taggarty Lee - Kamaitachi (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3.
Skill: 7/7. Writing skill aside, I love to see Tag's actual trainer skill coming through with his battles, move sets and strategy. I thought I knew a lot about these games and then Tag cam along and BAM my strategies went straight in the trash. Writing on-side, I thought it was adorable to see Tag go la-la over a silly little Slowpoke and can't wait to see that partner play out (especially battles). Can't really fault your posts so full marks.
Battle: 5/5. Tonbo battling <3 I wonder what his curse would be? :P
Total: 15/15
Justin Smart/Nate Guzman - Yzarc Drowsnam (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
Skill: 7/7. I've probably said this before but your dialogue is amazing. You should totally do script-writing if you don't already
. I'm liking the development of Justin and Nate as a team and it's even better to see their humanity conflicting with their job.
Battle: 5/5. Although your battles were brief, they were well-written and you paid particular attention to detail - especially with Hitmontop's Earthquake and its uncontrollable power.
Total: 15/15 Seiccan Serroc - Douken Sota (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
Skill: 7/7. Having a rock-style co-ordinator in Furoh should spice some performances up a bit! I really liked the way you put out the mystical Lugia performance and "Tiki-man"? LMFAO You had some great comedic moments in this roleplay - something that I think suits Seiccan well and I'd love to see him keeping up the humour in future. (Loving lil Drummer!)
Battle: 5/5. Nice battling with Mara. Shame about the others :P Very cute action from Seiccan's team - They're a hit with me already!
Total: 15/15
Posted by: Master Houndoom Oct 8 2011, 01:49 PM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=44860 is now complete.
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=4110 http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=52894 http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=3869 show up in Petropolis and go on to forget their previous troubles as much as possible. Tuesday performs in her first contest, and Darryn in his second, while Jaima gets his third gym battle in. Easy as 1, 2, 3, right? NOT right. There's returning rivals, mischievous mirages, and particularly petulant pokemon in the mix!
Posted by: Kamaitachi Oct 10 2011, 09:59 PM
The Mirrormist at Twilight
Well, I've been reading along this entire time, and needless to say, I think this was an excellent done roleplay, from start to finish.
I've grown very fond of Darryn, Lyla, Jaima, Meiko, and Tuesday, because I've been an avid reader of all of their roleplays thus far. There's a lot of definite character interaction, growth, and drama, which I enjoy greatly. It'll be sad to see Team Rogue disband, but it'll be interesting to see where your characters develop from here.
Darryn Kellor/Lyla Moore - Living Arrow (click to showhide)
Activity: 3/3
Skill: 7/7 So...what happens between now and Starfall Field that makes Lady go all emo?
Battle: 5/5 It was only one battle, and I may be biased since I played Rio, but still, it was a seat gripper!
Total: 15/15
Tuesday Berdison/Reilly Coons - Umbrae Calamitas (click to showhide)
Activity: 3/3
Skill: 7/7 It's really interesting to see Reilly with the group now, as I can't really see him as anything more than a neutral-hostile at best. It'll be interesting to see how he develops alongside Tuesday in roleplays to come.
Battle: 5/5 I think Taunt might've ruined your life, but you ran with it, and still wrote the battle with the aplomb I usually expect from you.
Total: 15/15
Jaima Kuonji/Meiko Kuonji Omura - Master Houndoom (click to showhide)
Activity: 3/3
Skill: 7/7 It's interesting to see how Nightwish immediately causes trouble, even as a new addition to the team. It was nice to see it expanded in the tandem roleplay in Starfall Field, so I'm curious as to see what comes of that drama?
Battle: 5/5 Wow! Jaima's Twilight Badge Battle was definitely an exciting one. Full marks for certain.
Total: 15/15
Posted by: Kamaitachi Oct 27 2011, 01:07 AM
Meh. Double Post.
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=58414 is in need of judging.
Taggarty Lee ventures to Aridana, where he meets and quickly engages in a battle with Vernon "Luck Truck" Blazena, whose Pokemon Egg has just hatched into a baby Riolu. The match ends poorly for Vernon, as Tag's Ledian, Suzu, sends Vernon's Tepig, Razor, to the infirmary with some serious wounds.
After the battle, some old acquaintances from Tag's past appear. Pino and Lily Graham, from Blackthorn City. Pino challenges Tag to a battle, and after a fairly extensive match, Pino wins, knocking Tag unconscious and taking his pokemon. As Vernon springs to Tag's aid, he's barred by Lily, who his a neophyte trainer in her own regard. Pino and Lily make a hasty getaway, while Tag recovers.
In need of a team to recover his companions, Tag races out into the desert, snagging two pokemon with quick balls. Tag then summons up his Snorunt, Orin, who evolves into a Froslass, and Zuki, his Poochyena.
Vernon stumbles across a wounded mudkip and takes it to the pokemon center.
Tag and Vernon engage Pino and Lily in their respective matches. Tag, using excellent tactics, defeats Pino in the rematch, reclaiming his pokemon. However, their battlefield is set aflame by a stray Fire Blast, causing Vernon to suffer a Post-Traumatic-Stress-Disorder Flashback. Tag paves the exit with Orin the Froslass, Ray MK III the Croagunk, and Lily's Trapinch, carrying Vernon to safety.
I'm bad at summaries.
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=57937 - Royal Summoner Kitten
-Tepig, Croagunk, Zorua, Riolu
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=37696 - Kamaitachi
-Ledian, Nidorino, Bellossom, Vulpix, Froslass, Slowpoke, Poochyena, Spinda, Nosepass
Posted by: 2gamers Oct 30 2011, 11:22 AM
Judgment Day: Review of “The Judged”
Another great story. We get to see more of Tag’s background and a little bit of Vernon’s. My only complaint on that front was that it was a bit short for my tastes. Very little time passed between Tag’s defeat and his victory. Alright, on to the reviews!
Taggarty Lee- Kamaitachi (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3.
Skill: 6/7
It’s about time we get some dish on Tag’s past. Even with the string of blasts from the past, Tag takes them in his usual Tag calmness. This calmness breaks when he loses his team of pokemon, forcing him to catch new pokemon in order to get them back. This is the part I had problems with. Not enough time was spent getting to know his new pokemon. I know he was in a rush and all, but considering the length of the RP, it would have been beneficial.
Battle: 5/5.
Somehow, Tag manages to get the most underused pokemon and defeat dragons with them. Great depiction of that.
Total: 14/15
Vernon “Luck Truck” Blazena- Royal Summoner Kitten (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
Skill: 3/7
It was great to see a character who’s very emotional (Vernon) interact with Tag. It was fun to see Vernon oblivious to Tag’s annoyance. While these extreme emotions seem to be part of his personality, they appear out of context with the situation. For example, Vernon goes on a tirade against Piro just minutes after the kid was defeated by Tag. Why would Vernon do that for someone who’s a complete stranger? When Piro reveals Tag’s past crimes to Vernon, not only does he ignore the charges, but he also attempts to give away a pokemon to Tag. We’re not given any detail as to why Vernon would do this. Had he at least questioned Tag about what Piro said, we may have gotten more details about Tag’s past and a closer relationship between the two.
Most of your posts are still quite short. In addition to speech and actions, you should include explanation as to why Vernon does what he does, as well as his thoughts on the situation.
Battle: 3/5
These posts could also be a bit longer. What direction is the attack coming from? How is it being performed? In addition, the switching tactics tend to be quite cheap, especially when attacking immediately afterwards. I’d like to note that Zorua’s Illusion ability should probably be limited to pokemon in Vernon’s team.
Total: 9/15
Posted by: Living Arrow Oct 31 2011, 10:38 AM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=50223&st=0&gopid=2028882&#entry2028882 has finished!
Just starting out, new trainers Lori and Will find themselves to be the punching bags of a local gang of bullies in Barley. To get the older kids to leave them alone, the pair challenge them to a Pokemon battle but will these young trainers have what it takes to win?
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=50056 - Living Arrow -Piplup, Snivy
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=50011&hl= - Zohariel - Baltoy, Sentret
Posted by: Kamaitachi Nov 7 2011, 07:56 PM
I'll take this, since it slipped under the radar. I should have it up by the end of the week at the latest.
Posted by: Kamaitachi Nov 10 2011, 01:17 PM
Too long in the waiting
Lori Pardare:
The Score (click to showhide)
Attendance: 3/3 It was short, but you stayed through.
Skill: 4/7 Your writing, as per usual, is excellent. It shows a good sense of humour, as well as a flair for telling stories. I cannot, in all good conscience, give you full marks, as you didn't meet the minimum required of ten posts.
Battle: 4/5 There was only one real battle, in my opinion, and it was well handled. I like that Lori has a long way to go. Once again, I can't give you full marks, due to there being one big battle, and not in a full roleplay.
Total: 11/15
Will soraka: (He's free to pick these up if he ever returns)
The Grade (click to showhide)
Attendance: 2/3 You were the one that left, so no full marks for you!
Skill: 4/7 It's a shame you went inactive, I really enjoyed Will as a character, as well as the skill you employed in portraying him. As with LA, I can't give you full marks, as it wasn't a complete roleplay.
Battle: 4/5 You only had one real battle, but it was handled nicely. Cubone vs Baltoy was fun to read, as was Sentret and Snivy versus Poochyena and Stunky.
Total: 10/15
Posted by: Absoleevee Nov 30 2011, 04:28 PM
Theft at Barley
OOC = http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=60022
RP = http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=60044
Roleplayers:
1. http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=9558&st=40&gopid=2035323&#entry2035323 - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=60006
2. http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=9558&st=40&p=2032956&#entry2032956-http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=59870
3. http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=9558&st=40&p=1977538&#entry1977538 - http://"http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=58487
Summary:
Allie arrives at Port Barley and hears about a thief stealing items from shops. Soon, she gets her bag stolen and meets Nate and Hunter as they help her find it.
Events-
* Hunter's Tyrogue evolved into Hitmonchan
* A giant battle with Meowth and Persian and win
Posted by: Living Arrow Dec 1 2011, 02:26 AM
GRADING: THEFT IN BARLEY
All in all a very basic roleplay that was well-written. Albeit predictable, I found it interesting to read from you three as I’m not familiar with your roleplaying as members in this forum and was keen to see how you worked together. Below are your scores and a couple of general comments:
Minor note for all of you: Please remember that not everyone can follow every roleplay so nicknames for Pokemon are not descriptive enough at the individual’s first mention. For exmple: “Lady was walking down the street...” isn’t as good as “Darryn’s Vulpix, Lady, was walking down the street…”. After the first mention, this is less important.
Also, all three of you should watch out so spellings and grammar – reading through your posts once before sending them in should help with that.
Absoleevee – Allie Snow (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3Skill: 5/7 I have to admit that I am a bit of a sucker for powerful first posts in a roleplay. Setting the scene nicely with a solid paragraph of descriptive text is usually how most people begin a new RP but we didn’t this time around. It didn’t take away from your skill here but I thought it would be nice to mention and see if we could get a hefty scene-setter next time
. Sometimes I felt there was a lack of personal feeling coming from Allie. Is she embarrassed that her two Pokemon are so mischievous? Doesn’t she get angry at Astrid for terrorising Valerie? I’d love to hear her thoughts on subjects like this a little more so we can get to know her better as a character.
Please try and make your posts more spaced-out using clear paragraphs. This has not lowered your skill but it would be easier to read next time if it were broken up more.
Battling: 3/5 I really liked how Allie’s abilities in battle were reflective as her ambitions as a Co-Ordinator. Sadly the battle was short so the score was lowered.
Total: 11/15 Pinsir – Hunter Price (click to showhide)
participation: 3/3
Skill: 4/7 For some reason I don’t feel like I got to know much about Hunter’s character at all. Nor did I learn much about his Pokemon. Some more detail on these aspects of your characters would have been nice – as it stood, I felt rather detached from Hunter for this RP.
Check out post #9. Allie slept for a while between leaving the group and bumping into Hunter again… But somehow that sort of time didn’t pass for him? Keep an eye on things like this to make sure it is conveyed clearly – it can make for some confusing reading otherwise!
Zach made an appearance in the battle with the Meowth/Persian… :s
Battling: 4/5 Please try to make battles more believable. Aipom shifted into Godmode when battling that Persian at first – I find it hard to believe that a wild, especially evolved, Pokemon didn’t manage to fight back at all while Aipom used four moves… Nice use of moves though and some decent length in your battle.
Total: 11/15
Prodigy – Nate Packerman (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3
Skill: 6/7 I’m always the first to comment when images are used in roleplays since I think it’s an awesome idea to include them! Nice mugshot of Nate!!!
Watch out for spellings and details such as: Buff being told to use Iron Defense… and then it used Harden instead? (I’d recommend clearing Harden from the movepool for Buff since Iron Defense will always be better… up to you though). Otherwise, a great job on your posts!
Battling: 4/5 Nice battling. Strategy was sound and detailed. However, explaining the thought behind each and every move was a bit much… The reader can interpret some of it so you don’t need to worry about the battle mechanics so much in future.
Total: 13/15
Posted by: Jonahman10 Dec 22 2011, 04:14 PM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=41191 A Sequel to http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=28399
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=41019&st=0
PC Cast:
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=26865-Amissa-http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=9558&view=findpost&p=717645*Thread Runner
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=37159-Deyv87-http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=9558&view=findpost&p=1045227
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=6596-Jonahman10-http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=9558&view=findpost&p=739788
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=27987-Ozzy-http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=9558&view=findpost&p=740446
Summary:
The cast is called back to help investigate the Gigarte Grotto Disaster, this time with a Pokeball specialist to help analyze the dreadful Pokeballs. After uncovering another facility in the mangled secret complex, Officer Jenny orders them to leave.
Note: After a prolonged absence of the thread leader and another member, we decided to cut the plot near the halfway point. Another continuation may be made if Amissa returns.
Posted by: 2gamers Dec 30 2011, 12:11 AM
The Hundred Years War: Review of “War on Drugs”
I think “War on Drugs” has been the longest running RP in PANE’s history. It’s sad to see inactivity kill it off. There is precedent for RP members continuing the thread long after the leader had left. I wouldn’t have minded seeing Amelia and Delainey become closer friends during the mission. Perhaps another time. Anywho, on with the review!
Daniel Worthington- Amissa (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 2/3
As the leader, you need to update your fellow members on what’s going on as far as activity is concerned. Otherwise, they’re stuck in an RP for two years.
Skill: 6/7
Your best moments are those involving the relationship between Daniel and Hercules. Top notch stuff. I hope you come back to PANE for more adventures.
Battle: 4/5.
Though Daniel’s battle with the magneton was good, as was the skunky capture.
Total: 13/15
Mack Echo Nima- Deyv87 (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 2/3
Skill: 6/7
Mack is probably the most underrated character in PANE. He’s very unique in the sea of teen-boppers. I love his mechanical genius tied in with a smelly hobo. Just wish I could have seen more of him. Hop you return as well
.
Battle: 0/5
I don’t recall any battles unfortunately.
Total: 8/15 Amelia Himan- Jonahman10 (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
Skill: 6/7
I like how Amelia feels guilty about the last RP’s events. Even when things were looking up for her farm, she still feels bad about causing the explosion. Good work, though I would have liked to have seen more.
Battle: 3/5
I rarely see outright defeat in these RPs. Amelia performed as expected against a high-level magneton. Unfortunately, it was still rather short. More battles would have been appreciated.
Total: 12/15
Delainey Triell- Ozzy (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
Skill: 6/7
Talking with the misdreavus was fun. One of the highlights of the RP.
Battle: 2/5
Coming to Amelia’s rescue was a nice touch, though even with a quilava, the magneton was twice its level. I would have expected more of a struggle.
Total: 11/15
Posted by: Dragonwish2 Jan 1 2012, 02:07 PM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=56839
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=56701
Characters:
Pokefan209: http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=45436&view=findpost&p=1375426 - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=9558&view=findpost&p=1379411 (Thread Wrangler)
SaphireShadows: http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=56788&st=0&p=1884217&#entry1884217 - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=9558&view=findpost&p=1885302
Pikalover10: http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=34230&st=0&p=926729&#entry926729 - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=9558&view=findpost&p=928459
Dragonwish2: http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=46005&pid=1399960&st=0&#entry1399960 - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=9558&view=findpost&p=1399982
Major Events:
Jason caught a Poochyena.
Christine caught a Bulbusaur.
The quartet was kidnapped and taken to Aridana from Port Barley.
Summary:
After an exciting reunion of old and new friends in Port Barley, the group is lured into an alley by a strange man. Knocked out with a Sleep Powder attack, they are taken to Aridana overnight, waking to find themselves tied up and held captive by a gross evil man and beautiful cruel woman. They are told they must work in their circus act, threatened at the lives of their Pokemon.
Due to the other three cast member's profiles being archived, and their lack of activity (the last post was in September), and due to me not having any idea to even make a smooth ending straight out of the climax, I put this up to be graded. With only 34 posts, this was a fairly short RP.
Posted by: Toogee Jan 1 2012, 07:49 PM
Cut Awfully Short: Review of “Aridana’s Absolutely Awful Adventure”
Though this RP met the grading requirements, the story portion didn’t even really get started. It’s a shame, because according to the discussion thread, this had potential to be a pretty silly RP. I wish this went a bit further, but with only one member remaining, what can you do?
Pokefan209: Kenz Issone (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 2/3
You’re the leader of the RP and you disappeared without a trace. Since the entire story revolves around Kenz, it would have been nice to warn the others that you would no longer post.
Skill: 5/7
Most of your posts were good. I didn’t get a good feel for the villians, but perhaps if the RP lasted longer, that would have changed.
Battle: 0/5.
Other than a little playing around with the metapod, not much in battles.
Total: 7/15
SaphireShadows: Christine Tennebraum (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 2/3
Skill: 6/7
I like seeing Christine’s feisty character. Shame we couldn’t see more.
Battle: 1/5
There was a short battle with the bulbasaur capture, but I would have liked to have seen more battles with their captors.
Total: 9/15
Pikalover10: Jason Goldan (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 2/3
Skill: 6/7
I liked Jason’s struggle to get out of his baonds and how it reminded him of his past life in Orre. His playful pokemon were also good.
Battle: 1/5
Random poochyeana battle was decent, but I wanted more.
Total: 9/15
Dragonwish2: Elizabeth (Liz) Nadira Shir (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
Skill: 5/7
You really need to stop quoting previous posts verbatim. As a reader, I really don’t like having to read posts twice one after the other. It’s fine if you want to give a brief summary of what happened, but I really don’t care for copy-pasting other character’s speech. I want to read more about Liz; I can read what others said in their posts.
Battle: 0/5
No battles.
Total: 8/15
Posted by: Umbrae Calamitas Jan 17 2012, 10:51 PM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=58066&st=0 is now complete.
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=58042
Participants:
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=57456&st=0&p=1919988&#entry1919988 -- Angels Fall First
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=57714&st=0&p=1932681&#entry1932681 -- Xehanorto
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=55787&st=0&p=1820691&#entry1820691 -- Yzarc Drowsnam
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=57991&st=0&p=1949723&#entry1949723 -- Umbrae Calamitas
Start Date: August 19, 2011
End Date: January 17, 2012
Length: 32 posts
Summary:
When two people bump into each other on the streets, it's a simple accident. Another introduces himself, and it's introductions all around. Everything is fine on a beautiful morning in the city, until the one stranger's pokemon is stolen, and the chase is on. After initially failing to catch the thief, Jill Laurent is joined by Lysander Doyle, and the two chase after the thief, eventually catching him after a pokemon battle. As it turns out, he's already handed his stolen prize off. With a new comprehension of each other's skills, among other things, Jill and Lysander continue on after the next set of thieves, eventually catching up to them in another part of town.
Posted by: Kamaitachi Jan 18 2012, 12:33 AM
A FOUND GEM!?
Overview: The roleplay quickly trimmed down into just Jill and Lysander. That sort of things sadden me a bit, when a thread-runner leaves. Anywho, good job, you two, for picking up the slack and continuing on regardless of absences.
Your scores:
Liam West - Angels Fall First (click to showhide)
Liam is an interesting, very jovial guy.
Activity: 1/3 You started the thread and disappeared fairly quickly.
Skill: 6/7 There's very little description for Liam outside that he's almost always chuckling. Your writing, though, is pretty solid, though.
Battle: No battles, no points.
Overall: 7/15
Kefka Gama - Xehanorto (click to showhide)
Kefka is an interesting person in that he's open and naive. He introduces himself to strangers and immediately tells Alexa is overarching goal in Furoh. Some of his thoughts seem rather nonsequitor.
Activity: 1/3
Skill: 4/7 I have some qualms with a few of your posts. Notably, Jill, Erica and Matt are laughing at his awkwardness, but it is stated that they laughed not so hard as to attract attention, or that it would be assumed that it wasn't about Kefka. Yet Kefka chose to react to it as if it had been pinpointed at him. That sort of omniscience is worrisome to me, or at least indicates that you did not read the others' posts thoroughly.
Battle: No battles, no points.
Overall: 5/15
Jill Laurent - Yzarc Drowsnam (click to showhide)
Activity: 3/3 You finished!
Skill: I have no complaints. The Jill/Kirby dynamic was rather interesting to read, in that they didn't get along with one another. There temporary alliance seemed fairly brittle, but they got the job done.
Battle: 5/5 Nice and varied, with no super advantages and very realistically played.
Overall: 15/15
Lysander Kirby Doyle - Umbrae Calamitas (click to showhide)
Activity: 3/3 You completed the rp.
Skill: 7/7 There was one time when you shifted from present to past tense, and it threw me a little while reading. Other than that, well done. It's nice to see when two parties work together but don't exactly enjoy the other's methods. I like the additional tension that brings to a story.
Battle: 5/5 Battles were fine, with no overwhelming advantages and a good mix of victories and defeats within each battle.
Overall: 15/15
Posted by: Yzarc Drowsnam Jan 19 2012, 10:45 PM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=59808 has been completed.
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=10528 - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=9558&view=findpost&p=834750
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=37696 - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=9558&view=findpost&p=1068240
http://pane.wikia.com/wiki/Nate_Guzman
Tag goes back to Gigarte in search of Raven, while Justin and Nate go back there for a Team Deception mission involving protecting a sleeping officer. The three meet up again, but are afflicted by whatever was affecting the officer. They also work alongside a team of three other Team Deception members: Omar, Miriam and Ace. Begin a terrifying series of nightmares, controlled by a seemingly nefarious villain.
Thanks, in advance! it might be somewhat of a read, but Kam and I are quite patient.
Posted by: Toogee Jan 22 2012, 01:01 PM
Nightmare on Gigarte St: Review of “The Tormented”
This was a very impressive RP. Going through everyone’s worst nightmares gave added depth to their character. Combined with an appearance by Darkrai, this made for a great read. Check it out if you have a lazy Sunday afternoon ahead of you.
Yzarc Drowsnam: Justin Smart (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
Skill: 7/7
You continue to be a master of dialogue. Justin and Nate’s relationship was very strong; going through various nightmares really showed it off well. Justin’s nightmare was particularly revealing: he didn’t trust anyone around him. Another view: his nightmare was losing his friends not by a disaster but by his own hands. He’s afraid that he would do something that would cause everyone to turn on him. Great portrayal, probably his best RP yet.
Battle: 5/5.
It would have been interesting to see some of Justin’s more hesitant pokemon pull their punches against Tag’s team. Other than that, there were plenty of battles to be had. The only improvement I could think of would be to have more of those battles against pokemon rather than people. Still, the last battle made up for it. Seeing Justin enraged and how it affected his strategy was a nice touch.
Total: 15/15
Kamaitachi: Tag Lee (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
Skill: 7/7
It seems the normally aloof Tag has finally found friends in Justin and Nate. I can’t wait to see how that develops. His sadness over Zuki’s departure was a nice touch.
Battle: 5/5
I have nothing to add here. Great battles. Like I said in Justin’s review, Tag’s pokemon may have resisted fighting Justin’s as well, bringing the fight to a standstill.
Total: 15/15
Posted by: Umbrae Calamitas Mar 3 2012, 01:55 AM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=59323&st=0has come to a close!
Began:October 11th, 2011
Ended: March 3rd, 2012
Posts: 35
Master Houndoom - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=3869- http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=9558&view=findpost&p=190745
Umbrae Calamitas - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=52894- http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=9558&view=findpost&p=191323
(Thank you, Living Arrow, for playing Vega.)
One of their group has turned their attention to other horizons and left to pursue a dream elsewhere, leaving Jaima, Tuesday, and Meiko to travel to the Petropolis gym so that Tuesday may face the gym leader in her first ever gym match. The match is long and the confident, experienced gym leader is faced against a learning opponent whose mind wanders faster than their pokemon can attack. Still, by the skin of her teeth and more luck than a leprechaun, she comes out on top, only to head back to the pokemon center to find Professor Oak awaiting her call, with a mission for his research assistant to perform, as her friends leave for PokeCon.
Posted by: Kamaitachi Mar 3 2012, 11:31 AM
Cusp of Twilight:
Well. The bulk of this piece is Tuesday's gym battle. There was some sideplot going on, with a recurrance of the villains from Divide and Conquer, unless I miss my guess. There was also some foreshadowing. I think it's safe to classify this as an 'in-between' roleplay, while you set things up for a future one. I'm hoping some of the plot-lines started here appear in "Changing of the Guard".
Blah blah blah, how I do go on!
In any case, I'd been debating on how to go about this roleplay. Well, I debated with myself.
Here's what I got:
Umbrae Calamitas - Tuesday Berdison (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3. No contest.
Skill: 7/7. I'm a big fan of the way you write. It's so detailed without being overwhelming, and manages to capture both the extrenal and internal without ever becoming didactic. It's also REALLY fun to watch Tuesday battle, considering she fluctuates between confidence and despair at almost every turn.
Battle: 5/5 One giant battle, and what a seat gripper it was!
Total: 15/15
Master Houndoom - Jaima Kuonji (click to showhide)
Particpation: 2/3. I docked a point for participation, because you contributed five out of the thirty-five posts. This is hard, considering Jaima and Meiko were relegated to background, however...
Skill: 7/7 ...despite the few posts, I enjoyed what I read. Like I said earlier, I think this is an in-between moment, and better than dragging on "Mirrormist and Twilight". Your dialogue, especially between Jaima and Meiko is very strong. If I cover everything up except for their dialogue alone, I still always know which character is which, without any sort of resort to gimmicks. (Nightwish is absurdly difficult for me to read. I think the overabundance of w's confuses me, but hey! It's still fun!)
Battle: 2/5 Nightwish beat up Squit a bit. 1 point for a battle existing, 1 for describing it in a pretty cool way.
Total: 11/15
Living Arrow - Vega (click to showhide)
I like the way you write Vega. I wish I could give you points for it.
I look forward to seeing where these new threads lead. Thank you guys for the fun read. *Killed for a terrible rhyme*.
Posted by: Kamaitachi Mar 15 2012, 10:38 PM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=58425 has reached its conclusion.
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=52867 - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=9558&st=20&p=1680785&#entry1680785
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=50054 http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=9558&view=findpost&p=1556891
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=53383 - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=9558&view=findpost&p=1703570
Brief Synopsis in bullet point form:
- There is a Bug Catching Contest
- Branwys and Cesc reunite, also briefly meet Seiccan
- Seiccan catches a Spinarak
- Cesc catches a Scyther
- There is great chaos due to a Spider Stampede, the cast is separated, and winds up with each others' pokemon
- The source of agitation in the bugs comes from a sonic inducer (or transducer?) Our heroes all converge there, magically, and fight the two goons running the machine.
- Aforementioned Goons are defeated.
- No one of note wins the Bug Catching Contest, but great fun and adventure were had by all. Also kisses (but not for Seiccan)
Thank you in Advance
Posted by: Toogee Mar 17 2012, 07:08 PM
Insect Snatching Challenge: Review of “The Bug Catching Contest”
What started as a typical bug challenge turned into a race to stop crazed bugs from destroying everything, all this fuss from a tiny machine. This was probably one of the more innovative RPs I’ve seen. Switching pokemon and the disastrous results that followed was a rather humorous read. That sequence was rather confusing with all the names being thrown around, however. I wasn’t sure who was who >_>. Oh well, onward.
Cesc Rojas- Kamaitachi (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
"I'm gonna stuff you in a pokeball, then teleport you to some faraway place where an old man with glasses will stare at you."
He paused, confused, then shrugged. "That didn't quite work. Maybe we should just make out."
Skill: 7/7
I liked the relationship between Cesc and Brawnys. Their reactions to missed calls were rather cute. The end was also great. There also Cesc’s ability with various languages: it gives him a sense of culture.
Battle: 4/5.
Same as the intro.
Total: 14/15
Brawnys ‘Tinkertot’ Muphenz- Master Houndoom (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
“What if some slutty mermaid had answered and he was dating her now?!”
Skill: 7/7
Same as Kamai. The addition of German is a nice touch.
Battle: 4/5
Same as intro
Total: 14/15
Seiccan Serroc- Douken Sota (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
"AHHH! I'M BLIND! I'M BLIND! SPEAKER! HELP ME OUT!!!"
Skill: 7/7
Seiccan seemed to be the odd man out in this RP. He didn’t really seem to connect with the other members. It can’t be expected that he makes friends with everyone he comes across, however. With that said, he was the arrogant guy who was somewhat calm given the situation, as described in his profile. No complaints here.
Battle: 4/5
Same as above
Total: 14/15
Posted by: Jonahman10 May 19 2012, 06:58 PM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=61581&st=0 has concluded. (It essentially ended all the way back in February but I was too lazy to post until now. My fault completely.)
Cast
1. http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=6596-http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=9558&view=findpost&p=739788- Jonahman10
2.http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=46005&pid=1399960&st=0&#entry1399960-http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=9558&view=findpost&p=1399982-Dragonwish
3. http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=61820-http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=9558&view=findpost&p=2128025- Toogee
4.http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=61902&view=findpost&p=2133275-http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=9558&view=findpost&p=2140016-ShinyRalts
Synopsis: Mr. Darsey has a pest problem, so he enlists some volunteers. However, the volunteers discover a myriad of vague Pride and Prejudice references sabotage to the environmental controls in a nearby sector, leading to a brief conflict before several arrests are made.
Posted by: Kamaitachi May 19 2012, 10:45 PM
Gigarte Gemma Grading!
The unique mix of this cast creates for an interesting story cocktail. It never once lost my interest, and I was constantly checking for updates while it was running at full speed.
Amelia Himan
Score (click to showhide)
Attendance: 3/3
Skill: 7/7 Amelia was quite possibly the only sane person there. As a result, she tended to fade into the background as the more powerful personalities did their thing. I do, however, enjoy the way you write Amelia, especially in parts where her mind worries about her farm and her debts almost moreso than the job at hand at first.
Battle: 5/5 Two evolutions in one RP? Fun! Well written battles get full marks
Total: 15/15
Darius Dovakhin
Grade (click to showhide)
Attendance: 3/3
Skill: 7/7 Darius is probably one of the most enjoyable characters in PANE. He comes across as quirky, but that's because he's so devoted to his journey in a way that no one else is. He's definitely a unique and enjoyable character, whom I hope to see more of.
Also...holy crap. King Leer. Amazing.
Battle: 5/5 King Leer sealed the deal, but nice description in the battles too!
Total: 15/15
Elizabeth Nadira Shir
Marks (click to showhide)
Attendance: 3/3
Skill: 6/7 It's really enjoyable watching Liz grow into a fully developed, fully fleshed out character. You don't always have to repost other's words verbatim unless you're directly playing off of it or giving Liz's reaction in full to their remarks for a particular reason. It's an old habit of mine too, but I've found it helps streamline the writing a bit, so it feels less like filler.
Battle: 5/5 Varied moves, and a nice kung-fu scene too!
Total: 14/15
Fenrir
Adjudication (click to showhide)
Attendance: 3/3
Skill: 4/7 Remember that as a reader, we don't have any idea as to what your character looks like. I'm clear you know them, but I don't like to read the profile until after I've read the rp, to see if you've sufficiently described your character. Give a little care in your intro post to introduce your character. Dragonwish did that for you in her next post, though. I also suggest reading through your posts, checking for small things like: "We will set of now" appearing instead of "We will set off now". Watch for things like "Their" instead of "There" and things like spaces between words. I'm also a bit suspicious on his ability to understand Deerling as well, despite your explanation.
Criticisms aside, Fenrir is a fascinating character. I know I gave you a hard time with him during your profile posts, but it's nice to see everything you put forward there come into play. I enjoyed reading Fenrir's take on everything, considering his vastly different upbringing.
Battle: 5/5 Varied moves, and interesting seeing that Fenrir takes part in them too as part of the pack. I wonder how he'll adapt to a more formal battle? I was, admittedly, a bit weirded out at the Magikarp trainer.
Total: 12/15
Posted by: Toogee Jun 14 2012, 10:45 PM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=59881 is finally complete.
Featuring:
http://pane.wikia.com/wiki/Pandora_%22Pan%22_Gibbs- Toogee
http://pane.wikia.com/wiki/Douken_Sota- Douken Sota
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=4110&st=0&p=41491&#entry41491- Living Arrow
Pan and Douken take a nice break in Petropolis, crashing at Darryn’s apartment while Douken trains and Pan works. First on the list, Pan took her buddies to the museum for a fundraising event…which was quickly crashed by the Disciples of Darkrai. Fighting ensues, triggering the revival machine to unleash a shiny aerodactyl. Pan grabs on and goes for the ride of her life. Her friends follow to make sure she doesn’t get turned into a Pancake. Despite the crash into the streets below, everything works out (thanks to her newly evolved golurk) and Pan captures the aerodactyl .
Recovery at the hospital revealed that Pan was pregnant with Justin Smart’s baby. She had only confided with Lyla; she wanted to keep tight lipped until she met with Justin. Meanwhile, Douken fought to the last pokemon against the gym leader Vega, earning his second badge. Finally, Pan traded her cleffa for Darryn’s poliwag, hoping that Lima would finally be able to pursue her dreams while the poliwag gained a new purpose in life. The RP ended with Pan and Douken flying north for Gigarte while Darryn and Lyla prepared for the trip to Fidona.
Man, that’s a lot of stuff…
Posted by: Kamaitachi Jun 15 2012, 12:51 AM
Looks like this one is up to me! Give me a few days, and I'll get it up and running.
Posted by: Douken Sota Jun 15 2012, 11:03 PM
And alas, the stage has been set with http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=63055 where http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=53383, http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=52867, and http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=58487 each tried to take a chance at the spotlight.
Opening Event: Contest battle between Seican and Cesc, with Cesc winning and setting up the duo's rivalry.
Catching Event: The three race to try and catch a silly Castform, with Seican catching and Hunter getting distracted with a Scoropi and catching.
Contest Event: Cesc and Seican each took their hands to the stage, getting their chance to fight Carmen. As Cesc won with the double knockout, Seican lost via points.
Hunter left because of computer and RL issues and had planned a battle against Maxi Z. However, the du left him at the Pokemon Center, not caring about the kid.
Cesc: 2 Seican: 1
Posted by: Living Arrow Jun 19 2012, 01:11 AM
Rocking the Waves: I'm on it. Latest for the result to be up will be Sunday but hopefully sooner.
~LA
Posted by: Kamaitachi Jun 19 2012, 10:40 PM
Pedagogues and Pugilists at a Particular Pageant in Prominent Petropolis.
It's a lengthy title with a packed plot. You guys manage to accomplish a lot in four pages of roleplay. Some "Wall-O-Text" joint posts easily helped smooth things along, so thank you for those. With Action and Drama aplenty, there was certainly enough to keep me engaged the entire time, so well done by you guys.
Darryn Kellor- Living Arrow (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3. Yep.
Skill: 7/7. If I had to say you had a strength in your writing, it's your skill with very clear characterization without resorting to schtick. True, you use quirks to differentiate your characters, but I'm always happy to see you delve past the superficial.
Battle: The battles were nicely written. It's enjoyable, at least for me, to watch Darryn focus on the function of moves rather than the appearance. 5/5
Total:
Pandora Gibbs - Toogee (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3. Yep.
Skill: 7/7/. Maybe it's just because I'm a huge dork, but I wanted to give you bonus points for the link to Tuesday's gym battle, and the Ballroom Blitz video.
I love seeing this very human aspect of Pan. I think you did a really good job capturing her feelings regarding her new drama. It's a very difficult sort of emotion to capture, and I think you managed to pull it off with aplomb and skill, without making it melodramatic or cliché.
I'm also trying to figure out if Droid has a sense of humour. He's a pretty amusing pokemon/robot.
Battle: Your battles are always well written and believable, which I love. I, admittedly, try to follow your example when writing battles in my own rp posts. Cheers. 5/5
Total: 15/15
Douken Sota - Eponymous (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3. Yep.
Skill: 4/7 I always enjoy that Douken is inherently himself. He's a pretty straightforward guy, with a straightforward and unencumbered attitude. He and his pokemon team are all nicely developed. Also, Douken's tendency to throw off his shirt is probably one of the most amusing things in the world to me. I laugh every time. Douken might as well forego shirts altogether. http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/WalkingShirtlessScene
QUOTE
"That must of been one of a battle,"
You absolutely need to watch out for these. They're incredibly jarring when I read your posts, because you're slapping the English language in the face when you write them. I understand a typo here or there, and I easily forgive them from everyone, even the occasional homophone that slips by the spellcheck. But there's a huge difference between "Must've/must have" and "must of", because the latter just simply isn't correct.
Please, be wary of switching tenses and perspective, which is something you do often as well. I know they're meant to be asides, but do try to keep them in the same vein as the rest of your posts. It would be one thing if everything was written in first person, or written entirely in present tense, as that would imply an artistic choice. But one sentence out of an entire paragraph is rough.
Examples:
QUOTE
I mean, yeah, balls that fit in your pocket something can hold a being bigger than a house, but a flying car!
QUOTE
With Sabre's wing's glowing white, he launched himself faster than expected of a metal bird (unless you include the fct that the wings are actually hollow and lighter than seems).
Finally: watch those spelling mistakes! I'm pretty sure that they're all chalked up to typos. They're tiny things like "lesten" instead of "lessen", "Driod" instead of "Droid", and "havre" instead of "have". Even if you type your posts in the forum boxes, there's a spell-check there. Regardless, re-read your post before you post it. Your posts are always chock full of mistakes, and I'm tired of seeing it. You're a great storyteller, and I get annoyed because I can't enjoy them to their fullest because they're so rife with mistakes.
Battle: 5/5 Your battles are well done, as always. I was amazed when Douken sent Balisk in against Vega...and managed to win! I found myself cheering for the Dunsparce, just because they're a pokemon that
never get used. Douken's battle strategies in the gym match were very well played, as well.
Total: 12/15
Posted by: Living Arrow Jun 24 2012, 04:11 PM
GRADING: Rocking the Waves of Fidona Island!
This one's got battles a'plenty and there was a whole bunch of characterisation throughout! Quite a lot to get through in this roleplay but thankfully I was involved with a portion so had a little bit of a head start this time around. NON-STOP BATTLING FTW!
Douken Sota – Seican Serroc (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3. Done.
Skill: 5/7. This is where I sometimes get unstuck with your writing. Clearly you've got a million creative ideas going on with Seican – he's not run-of-the-mill and he certainly isn't likeable to everyone by any means. I like that about his character and I enjoy seeing him get competitive with his new rival but the fluidity of your posts can sometimes detract from what is going on. For example, 'Listen, this gives goes right, I might be able to,"' made me stumble when reading and the flow of Seican's phone conversation was ultimately ruined while I had to work out what he was meant to be saying. I et the odd spelling and grammar mistake go (we're all human) but sentences like those are really hard to sweep under a rug. Since you are now one of the veterans of the forum I expect these sorts of things to be ironed out before I come to grade them and so your skill points took a hit.
I also found it particularly strange for Seican to refer to Cesc as “kid” when he's older by four years... Even though he's arrogant, I doubt Seican is that arrogant. I feel that Kamaitachi caught you out on that one... But I may be wrong.
Even given the slips, you had some very clever references e.g. “Screaming my name, wishing my signatures were tattoos”. You capture humour really well, too.
Battle: 5/5. Plenty of action (NON-STOP!) and some well thought-out combos.
Total: 13/15
Kamaitachi – Cesc Rojas (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3. Done.
Skill: 7/7. I love the way you portray Cesc's politely lofty attitude to his rival – it's always pretty clean-cut and it never feels awkward or seems odd for him to act in the ways that he does.
On the things-to-watch-out-for side: It was a little presumptuous for Cesc to assume Hunter could referee a Contest battle but it was pulled off fine in the end. Also, it was odd how Cesc initially though using Spanish commands would be useless against a Hall Leader and then when battling Carmen went back on that thought.
Battle: 5/5 Your battles are some of the ones I look forward to most – always cleverly planned and expertly written. I often find myself struggling for ideas when playing the part of Leader/Challenger when paired with you! Full points.
Total: 15/15
free oatmeal – Hunter Price (click to showhide)
Participation: 1/3. What happened?! I was really enjoying Hunter's contribution until he left!
Skill: 6/7. You write really well – I was just disappointed to see you take an enormous step back during the Cesc/Seican battle and wait until the very end before posting. True, they did post very quickly but seeing Hunter's reaction throughout would have been great. I also found it strange that for someone who didn't know anything about Contests before the battle was able to make such a broad range of in-depth comments after the battle...
Battle: 2/5. Unlike the others you only had one battle. It was actually very good... but there was only one... Points were docked for this reason.
Total: 9/15
Posted by: Yzarc Drowsnam Jul 5 2012, 10:03 PM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=62034 has been completed.
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=37696 - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=37696
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=57937 - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=9558&view=findpost&p=1947053
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=55787 - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=9558&view=findpost&p=1821826
Still in Gigarte, Taggarty Lee decides to train in preparation for a gym battle against the gym leader, Chloe. He runs into Vernon from previous travels, as well as Jill Laurent, who recently came into a sum of money large enough to quit her job. She has decided on Gigarte's gym.
The three team up when a bunch of pokemon from the nearby circus are set free and are integral in putting down the stampede. Afterwards, both Tag and Jill try their hand against Chloe.
Posted by: Living Arrow Jul 9 2012, 12:41 AM
I'll take this one - expect a grade by the weekend
Posted by: rt117 Jul 12 2012, 07:47 AM
After some discussion with one of the other players, http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=55372 is to be closed and reviewed for grading. It is technically incomplete, however it wasnt far from being finished.
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=18464 -http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=9558&view=findpost&p=491890
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=17616 -No Current Level Page currently (was removed during purge, a mod has already been contacted about this)
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=26159 - No Current Level Page (Purged)
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=54111&st=0&p=1732965&#entry1732965 - No Current Level Page (Purged)
Following the events of 'In The Jungle, The Mighty Jungle', Alex, Tom, and Tikal gather together to go watch Tom participate at an event in the Fidona festival, while a disoriented Tyson (who awakens to find himself lost), meets Mel, who practice with a quick battle. Eventually the four meet up at the festival, where Tyson and Tikal go off on their own for awhile to have a practice battle, before returning to the contest that Tom signed up for. After the events, Alex and Tikal go off to explore some ancient ruins to kill some time.
Events:
Tikal's Igglybuff evolves into Jigglypuff
Alex's Torchic evolves into Combusken
Alex's Mudkip evolves into Marshtomp
Alex's Shinx evolves into Luxio
Mel captures a Kangaskhan
Tyson captures a Zorua
Tyson's Cyndaquil evolves into Quilava
Alex was supposed to catch a Riolu in the ruins, but we didn't get that far
Posted by: Kamaitachi Jul 12 2012, 02:25 PM
That Lion Still Sleeps!? - Review for "In the Village, the Peaceful Village"
Overview:
When I read rps, I'm definitely looking for a story, something coherent that ties everything together. This appears to be a happenstance series of events, with each character basically just doing their own thing, then battling one another. I figure if the story had played out further, there would've been something, but as it stands, there's not much happening except individual events for each of your characters. The story also came off as just a means to have everyone's pokemon evolve. I can't rightly give full points for these things, you know?
One thing to watch out for, even though I enjoy it, is giving your characters' pokemon more personality than the human characters. Your characters' personalities need to be just as evident as the ones you display your pokemon with, otherwise Tyson, Tikal, Alex and Mel fade into generic blandness.
Grades:
Alex Slasher (Captain Combusken) (click to showhide)
Participation: 11 posts. 2/3
Skill: 3/7 Your writing is full of good ideas, but you tend to throw them together in an almost haphazard way. My advice to you is to begin to gel them out, so that thoughts, as well as your sentences, flow. Here is an example:
"He took a pokeball from his bag. It was orange and covered in fuzzy, soft material."
Now, you can smooth that into a compound sentence (That isn't a run-on!): "He took an orange, fuzzy-material covered pokeball from his bag."
This should help vary up your sentence structure, otherwise it just gets tedious when one reads: "He did this. He did that. That guy did that."
A few small other details can be adjust, like: "Tom was adjusting the bow tie that went with his Top hat when Alex approached the group, with Blaze following close behind, since Alex had put him on the ground on the way here."
I think it's better to see the sequence of events, rather than inserting them posthumously. Alex could've set Blaze down earlier in the approach, or simply not set Blaze down at all.
What your typos, as there are a lot of them. Spellcheck will not catch those tricky ones, so pay close attention to things like: "Form" instead of "Form" and "Bets" instead of "Best".
Pay close attention to proper formats for dialogue, you jam them all together and it gets very fussy.
Technical notes aside, Alex is a very, very straightforward person. Tom ends up being very straightforward as well. The problem for me when reading their dialogue is that if I covered their names, I can't tell who is who. Both your primary character and your partner are very, very similar in personality. The only things that really differentiate them are their career choices, pokemon teams and physical appearances, other than that, I'd swear they were just clones of one another.
Also, that Contest was just...nuts. Please run something like that by a mod, because it was nothing like the Contest Battles are supposed to be. If it's a separate Festival, then explain more precisely what it is, otherwise there's bound to be confusion.
Battle: 1/5 The Battle with Krabby and Shellder was rather quick, and lacked description. Tom's contest battles were BLOWN through, as if you wanted to just get them over with to get to the next plot point. We barely got any description, just a sequence of things that happened.
Total: 6/15
Tikal Faylen (rt117) (click to showhide)
Participation: 15 posts (including joint posts) 2/3
Skill: 5/7 Your writing is quite fluid, and you handle sequences of events well without becoming tedious.
Battle: 3/5 Good Battle with Protoman, lengthy and well described.
Total: 10/15
Tyson Parker (click to showhide)
Participation: 11 posts (including joint posts) 2/3
Skill: 5/7 I do love the Ninja Turtwigs. I wish I'd seen more of them.
Battle: 3/5 I'm a little amazed that Cyndaquil knows Flamethrower at such a low level. It's sort of an unspoke rule now that the Pokemon learn their moves at the appropriate levels, unless approved by a mod, so Blaze wouldn't have learned the move until Level 40, later now that he's evolved into Quilava. Zorua capture was super brief. Good battle with Tikal.
Total: 10/15
Mel Sinclaire (Seromi) (click to showhide)
Participation: 3 Posts!? 1/3
Skill: 5/7
QUOTE(Mel)
Mel felt as if a thousand things had happened at once. Maybe they did, but who knows?
<3
Battle: 3/5 I'm confused that Kangaskhan took enough damage to be captured after only one quick attack and a comet punch. Zorua's Illusion ability is something that could get seriously overpowered, if you're not careful. Just like the advice given to Big Bang Thundurus, keep it to pokemon on Mel's team, or pokemon it can see.
Total: 9/15
Posted by: Living Arrow Jul 17 2012, 03:59 PM
RP Grading – Back in the Zone
Overview:
So so sorry for being late on this one, guys! Thanks for your patience and, more importantly, thanks for a great read! I always love the spectacle of gym battles and so getting to grade this one was a good thing for me! Let's hope the Channel 4 news group were filming in the audience
Grades:
Tag Lee (Kamaitachi) (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3
Skill: 7/7 Always great to read your posts – I love the touches of humour you throw into Tag's awkward life and never forget that he socially pretty inept.
Battle: 5/5 I've said it before and will say it again – your battles are probably the best thought-out and written in the PANE community and even if there were any minor mistakes (which I can never find, damn you!) they'd be glossed over pretty quickly.
I loved the Kana/Tonbo battle at the start of the RP – just goes to show the underdogs can still come out on top!
Then the epic circus battle was written cleanly and crisply with clear attention to detail with each Pokemon's characteristics adhered to perfectly.
The gym battle was a first for Tag – a loss! He was finally humanised!
Seriously though, I loved the battle and can't wait for the rematch.
Total: 15/15
Luck Truck?! (Big Bang Thundurus) (click to showhide)
Participation: 1/3. You ducked out early and the posts you did were short.
Skill: 3/7 You need to watch out for too many assumptions in a roleplay where the grader may not know your character completely. For example, Razor's introduction seemed a bit blunt since I couldn't work out what Pokemon he was for two paragraphs after his initial mention in your first post. This came up several times throughout the roleplay.
A little thing that sometimes bothers me with any roleplayer's posts is to do with the size and weight of Pokemon compared to their trainers. Unless specifically specified to be bigger or smaller than the standard Pokedex reading, I take issue with trainers riding on Pokemon or the other way around. In Vernon's case, I feel that carrying around a 10kg Tepig in his arms with a 20kg Riolu on his back would be something of a struggle for a 5'4'' boy of 12 and yet there was no mention of how heavy that was... True, its not entirely necessary but it left me wondering if it had even been considered in the first place. A minor irk but it bothers me all the same.
Next is the post length. Sure, I don't expect an essay every time you post but sometimes it is really good for a roleplayer to let the reader know what their character is thinking and feeling. This does two things, really – develops your character and makes the reader more engaged in the character's personality. Without this sort of writing, many readers may switch off and become detached from the human character. Ultimately this can end up pushing your main character into the background behind the Pokemon that you have given great personalities to.
It felt like you wanted a lot of drama in your posts, especially in the circus battle where Vernon captured Ulrich and immediately used him in battle with no introduction and not a flicker of the rage/confusion that the Pawniard was in prior to their meeting. A pretty confusing and frustrating set of posts, to be honest. I think you could have made this much better by pacing the posts a little more and not biting off more than Vernon could chew.
Battle: 2/5. A little rushed and continuously out-battled by opponents doesn't always make for great reading. Fair enough, Vernon is relatively inexperienced but you could have picked better opponents to get some more creativity going in your battles.
Total: 6/15
Jill Laurent (Yzarc) (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3
Skill: 7/7. I had never read one of your roleplays with Jill before but from the first post I was hooked on her. Where has this little treasure been all this time?! We have never ever had such a stark character (since Justin!) in PANE and it makes for very exciting reading to have a character like hers in the community. If I could fanboy any more over Jill, I would – she is phenom! Living the dream at her age and with such a tragic backstory made me root for her all the way – Go Jill!!!
As for battling, her style reminds me a little of Tag but with a slightly haphazard hand behind the moves that makes her newbness all the more real.
Battle: 5/5. Like Kamitachi, your battles are among the best in the community and the content within them is always sound and well played out. I liked the way Jill captured the errant Vulpix after its pre-battle with the Growlithe and the gym match was mega-epic for a new trainer's first attempt!
Total: 15/15
[size="6"][/size]
Posted by: Douken Sota Sep 25 2012, 09:43 AM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=64935 is closing because Pinsir went MIA and Huntman seems to be too busy to ontinue with pane (Life over RP). No use in grading it since it was only a set up to the set plot and it is not even half a page long.
Posted by: Kamaitachi Sep 25 2012, 04:04 PM
Blargleblargh. I hate it when RPs die out like that!
As a consolation though, I can give you the 3/15 minimum score for an incomplete roleplay. Huntsman and Pinsir are free to retrieve their 3 points as well, should they ever deign to return to us.
Posted by: Living Arrow Oct 11 2012, 01:08 AM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=60379&st=0 is complete!
Participants:
Living Arrow - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=50056
LSP - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=16100
Synopsis:
Meeting for the first time on the outskirts of Fidona's main town, Lori and Joey get off to a shakey start with their introductions but it is rapidly evident that Lori has far less experience with Pokemon training than Joey. He agrees to help her catch a wild Unova Pokemon (as per her mission) and soon enough they find a Purrloin chasing a Minccino.
Lori's Piplup quickly falls in battle against the two wild Pokemon and so Lori asks Joey to battle with her so that she can catch both. Her Snivy and his Igglybuff battle well but the Minccino escapes and Joey accidentally catches the Purrloin himself! Lori is instantly offended but Joey assures her that he will continue to help with her first capture. Overjoyed with the assistance promised to her, Lori writes a letter to her sister Kino (Unova League Champion) and requests some strings get pulled so that Joey lands his own sponsorship deal so that he can have enough money to fed and clothe himself and his Pokemon better than he has been so far.
Back in the forest, both trainers locate the Minccino from the day before and Lori enters battle with it again. However, yet again, it gets away. Furious and determined, Lori goes in hot pursuit and ends up chasing it into the massive nest of a Braviary. Chased out of the nest while examining an egg she found in the nest, Lori and Joey find themselves defending from the massive eagle's attacks and work together to trap it under the roots of a tree. Shortly after, Lori puts everything she has into catching the Minccino and finally succeeds.
Just when it seems all is calm, both trainers are escorted by spear point to a local tribal village where they are requested to help with a bizarre marriage ceremony by battling Alomomola. They do and leave at the first opportunity.
Back at the Pokemon Center, the pair are joined by Lori's sister Kino who has brought along a potential sponsor for Joey - Jana de Vries. This woman offers Joey a Co-Ordinator sponsorship while Kino explains the terms of Lori's own deal to her in more detail.
The RP ends with Joey going to begin the first day of his sponsorship and Lori preparing for a Gym match at the Fidona Gym.
Captures! (click to showhide)
Joey caught a Purrloin!
Lori received a Rufflet egg!
Lori caught a Minccino!
Posted by: Yzarc Drowsnam Oct 14 2012, 03:10 PM
RP Grading - Flowers in the Jungle
Overview:This took me a little while to get through. It was a long RP, and I gotta say, it moved painfully slowly towards the beginning. The plot moved around quickly, but the focus was on the growth of the relationship between Joey and Lori, so the constantly shifting plot points were of little consequence to the ultimate purpose.
I guess my biggest issue with this is that the biggest obstacle the two trainers overcame happened in the first half - The Braviary attack. It seemed like it was getting scarier when they were captured by the natives, but they ultimately got out of that because Lori is well connected and it was pretty clear they were never in any real danger. It made for a somewhat anticlimactic plot, in my opinion. Still, it was well written on both parts, and we can't expect young trainers with low leveled pokemon to be involved in epic stories.
Grades:Lori Pardare (Living Arrow) (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3 - Of course!
Skill: 7/7 - Though, as mentioned, I had a few issues with the plot, it was done well. Lori stayed in character the entire time, she interacted well with the NPCs, Joey and her and his pokemon.
Battle: 5/5 - Lots of good battles. My favorite was the one with Braviary, obviously, as the boss battle. I like how sassy Triss is when it comes to battle. WHA'EVA WHA'EVA I DO WHAT I WANT. Also, locking Alomasdlkashf into Aqua Ring was pretty tight.
Total: 15/15
Joey Sweet (LittleShadowPokemon) (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3 - You probably deserve a 4/3
Skill: 7/7 - Same with LA, I'm not gonna deduct points for the plot, and I'm gonna focus on how you handled your character within the plot. That said, I'm sure you're not surprised to see you got all seven points. You know your character in and out, and I know this because I feel like I know your character extremely well too. Joey is so quirky and weird, and yet nothing about him seems alien in the least. I understand all of his thought processes, because of how descriptive you were.
That said, I would love for you to hold off on describing every single thought going through his head as the RP progresses. Early on, it's necessary for the reader to get into the character, but later it just feels like it's dragging. He's deaf and it's hard for him to communicate outside of his own head, I get it. Later in the RP was so much better because there was actual dialogue, which meant new material.
Battle: 5/5 - Lots of battles, most of them were really good. Sinbad was freakin' cool, and I think his interactions between Joey's pokemon and how unique they are is awesome. I like how he's sort of adopted Babylon and they train together.
Total: idk i dont feel like doing math
Posted by: Xires Dec 19 2012, 08:19 AM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=67527 has been completed
- Trainers:
- http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=67500
- http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=4608&hl=
In this short, two on two RP, Gaven and David work together to fight a large Heatmor for a bit of Poke. I'll be honest, the only reason I participated in this was because I was waiting for my friends down at the GTS Roleplayer's Coalition to sign up, so I don't expect high marks.
Posted by: Kamaitachi Dec 20 2012, 12:26 PM
I'll take this. I should have time to read and get a proper review in by Monday.
Unless the world explodes.
So Monday.
Posted by: Kamaitachi Dec 24 2012, 07:50 PM
Barley Bounty
The RP is super quickly done. One minute David and Ganym meet, are suspicious of one another, their pokemon interact, then suddenly they're already fighting the thing they were searching for.
It goes through the motions of an adventure, but, for me, there's a real lack of connection between the two outside of their teamwork. Gaven's suspicion disappears almost immediately, and there's no real denoument to the story. Heatmor captured and it's over. I think both of you could take just a little more time to go deeper into your writing.
But the story is a good traditional one, both of your writing is pretty good, and the battle was nicely done, even if there was only one.
Gaven Ganym (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3
Skill: 5/7 The posts are pretty short, but I do love me some Barrimore! I would love to see a little more insight into Gaven.
Battle: 3/5 One battle, nicely handled, taking up the bulk of the rp. I got a bit annoyed that it took them almost no effort to find the Heatmor though, considering that was sort of the crux of the story.
Total: 11/15
David Anderson (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3
Skill: 5/7 Posts are very, very short, and we learn very little about David. There's very little insight into him or his pokemon outside of his actions.
Battle: 3/5 See Gaven's
Total: 11/15
Posted by: Douken Sota Dec 31 2012, 12:27 PM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=64560 has now been completed!
As a recap of events, http://pane.wikia.com/wiki/Douken_Sota and http://pane.wikia.com/wiki/Pandora_%22Pan%22_Gibbs decided to get ready to call it a night when a large new building caught their eyes: Crescent Inn. Landing, they were able to see what the hype was about but lacked the money to rent the room for the pair. Douken tried to make a deal by using Darryn's name, which made Pan angry and storm off.
At the same time, http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=10528 and his friend got a mission up in Arasam, but after a phone call from Pan, he chose to make a detour over to the inn. However, peace would not last long as an outside force decided to call it a night for everyone.
Each trainer was sent over into one of their Pokemon's dreams. Douken was sent into Maya's, Justin was sent into Octillary's, and Pan was sent into Frog's. However, with Dream Eaters invading these worlds, pathways into other dreams started to come forth, letting them come together until they reach the final dream, where they met Cressilia being held captive by a Gengar and his army. Fighting back, they were able to take down the boss.
Waking up from the events, Pan let them know about her pregnancy and Justin let Pan know about his work with Team Deception. With the events ending, Justin headed back into Arasam as Douken and Pan got ready for their last adventure together in Lenolia.
((http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=64253 made one post, but that was it. She never got there to join in the dreams.))
Key things:
Douken obtained a Dratini
Dratini evolved into Dragonair
Everyone obtained a Lunar Wing
Posted by: Kamaitachi Dec 31 2012, 02:51 PM
I've been reading along as you post, so I'll take this one.
I should be able to have a grading up by Tuesday or Wednesday.
Happy New Years!
Posted by: Kamaitachi Jan 5 2013, 02:31 PM
CICICI
Douken Sota (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3 Yay!
Skill: 3/7 Douken, your writing drives me insane.
QUOTE
"Don't tell me that was the Skarmory you were trying to replace back at the farm." Bullseye as Sabre cried like crazy.
QUOTE
You seemed to of been doing some practice
QUOTE
The bird's have been flying non stop anyways
Those were just the ones in the first post! I find it difficult reading your posts because these really jar me, and then your posts seem really herky-jerky and thrown together in terms of plot. It's hard for me to keep up, because I feel like I want to follow a particular train of thought further before I'm jerked over to the next thought. I'm not saying that you need more description, but perhaps a little more follow-through with each thought. You have a lot of great ideas, but I think you're trying to smash them all together without considering the flow of things. Or maybe it's that you understand them in your head, but it doesn't communicate clearly to us, the readers.
Some people will argue that it's okay to read. Not for me. English is my third language, and it took me a long time to grasp. I get confused and then upset when I'm reading, because I have to stop and stare at it.
As I said last time I graded you, you're a good storyteller, so PLEASE focus on cleaning up these errors from your posts. We all make typos and mistakes, but this is getting out of hand. It's also a little jarring when the pokemon species names are butchered. "Ursurang" was one, but "Ghasty", "Kirli", "Crissillia" It's lazy writing and you're so much better than that.
Battle: 5/5 Grammatical, Spelling and Syntax errors aside, your battles are well done.
Total: 11/15
Justin Smart (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3 Yay!
7/7: It's really wonderful, the way you capture the timbre and emotion of a scene through dialogue. Octillery's dream was an excellent example of this, with the unexpected little ending that left a smile on my face.
A warning: Sometimes, when you feel like explaining, you like to do it in a way that 'breaks the fourth wall'. Just be mindful of the tense switches when you do that.
Battle: 5/5 As usual, it's nice to see Justin's straightforward "hit it until it faints" battle methodology. It's very fitting for his character, and you write it well.
Total: 15/15
Pandora Gibbs (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3 Yay!
7/7: Excellent writing, as always. I loved your portrayal of Frog, and the use of "Pink Elephants on Parade" made that dream post that much more surreal and enjoyable.
5/5: I rather enjoyed watching Droid and Frog against the horde. For me, it fell rather "Lord of the Rings", especially because I continued to project Frog's knightly speech on him even after he stopped talking. I also always love seeing Fenrir in action! (I think that's because Arcanine is one of my favourites!)
Total: 15/15
Posted by: rt117 May 10 2013, 09:10 PM
Since my RP partner has not replied for several months and has disappeared almost all together, I would like to submit the incomplete RP http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=65067 for grading.
Participants:
Protoman - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=26159
rt117 - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=17616
Start Date: 15 July 2012
End Date: 10 May 2013 (Incomplete)
No. of Posts: 20
Summary:
In this RP, Tikal awaits her friend's arrival on the island of Fidona while getting some training done with her Charmeleon and Jigglypuff as she awaits Tyson's return from his 'overnight training', as he prepares for a rematch against the local gym leader. When they finally meet up, they proceed to the gym, remembering that the way up the stairs is host to a number of traps. Prior to entering the gym they make plans to go on a picnic, though before they can they must see if Tyson is ready for his rematch. The story got stopped at this point, currently at the start of the gym battle.
Notes:
- The picnic was supposed to be where Tikal battled and captured her Dratini. Im assuming that since the RP did not reach that point, I will have to reapply for the capture
- At the beginning of the RP, Tyson's Squirtle evolves into Wartortle.
- Tikal's Jigglypuff learns Nightmare, and Charmeleon learns Swords Dance.
Posted by: Yzarc Drowsnam May 11 2013, 01:23 PM
Sorry it didn't work out for you guys. I'll grade it.
Posted by: Yzarc Drowsnam Jun 1 2013, 07:05 PM
Yeah! Three weeks, that must be a damn record to read like 20 posts (which I already read a while ago haha)
Sorry about that. I moved last weekend so things were a little hectic all month, and on top of it, I still had to work of course. Anyway, the RP obviously didn't go for very long. Each of you had a small battle, and your posts were good (Protoman's were a little on the short side)
Tyson - 5 levels. You put in some work, but you gave up, so I can't justify giving any more than this. (These are, of course, assuming you ever come back )
Tikal - 8 levels. Your posts were strong, and you stuck it out until it was clear Protoman wasn't coming back.
Hope it works out better for you next time!
Posted by: Toogee Jun 1 2013, 10:44 PM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=67996 is complete!
Pan and Douken traveled back to Lenoilia to meet up with a group of scientists researching cubone colonies. Turns out that was a ruse by Team Deception, who wanted them to enter the graveyard and face off with Darkrai's Disciples. They did just that...only to die trying. Luckily, their grim reaper was merciful and they were revived in time to stop Darkrai from conquering the world! They were victorious in battle, but Team Deception swooped in in the end and captured Darkrai!
It was a very crummy way to end Pan's adventures, but with a baby on the way, she had other things on her mind. She flies off to Barley to a ship headed for Kanto and her hometown of Celadon City. Well, that's what she thinks...
Staring:
http://pane.wikia.com/wiki/Pandora_%22Pan%22_Gibbs- Toogee
http://pane.wikia.com/wiki/Douken_Sota- Douken Sota
Posted by: Kamaitachi Jun 1 2013, 11:36 PM
I've been reading this as you guys posted. I'll take this one.
Posted by: Kamaitachi Jun 5 2013, 11:39 PM
Darkrai's Destined Dirge:
A few short comments:
-Oh my goodness, I got so worried when Pan and Douken died, mostly because I wasn't sure how that would affect Pan's womb.
-I absolutely loved the "Knights of the Round" Style final attack.
-Really neat storyline, with some pretty fun storytelling.
Scores:
Pandora Gibbs (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3
Skill: 7/7
Battles: 5/5
Total: 15/15
Douken Sota (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3
Skill: 5/7 Your writing is getting clearer. Still a lot of lazy mistakes, but on the whole, much better.
Battles: 5/5
Total: 13/15
Posted by: Hunter01 Jul 14 2013, 07:41 AM
After 7 long months http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=67858&st=0 is finally complete!
Jill and Sebastian both started off their journeys in Port Barley as they abruptly met whilst Sebastian unleashed some anger onto a wild Krabby. Jill's natural instincts of protection allowed her to help out the Krabby whilst also teaching Sebastian a lesson on who to pick on. Clearly in a bad mood Sebastian went on the search for some training dummies, instead he found a Totodile which has an obsession with chewing on its own tail, in the end Sebastian captured the Totodile. Meanwhile Jill had her belongings stolen by a duo of cronies. Sebastian was nearby and willing to help on one condition, he get a rematch battle against her. After successfully defeating the cronies and retrieving Jill's belongings the two healed their Pokemon at the Pokemon Center before there rematch battle on the beach. In the end Sebastian won the battle and realized that Jill had taught him a lesson to think things through more. Sebastian and Jill parted ways as Sebastian purchased TM X-Scissor from a nearby TM stall at Port Barley wharf.
Posted by: Yzarc Drowsnam Jul 16 2013, 08:24 PM
The Beauty and the Bad Boy
Sincere apologies for not getting to this in a very timely manner. I've been goin' through some stuff, but anyway, on to the comments!
The story was fun. I enjoyed getting to know the characters and seeing them interact with pokemon. It's definitely interesting to see Sebastian being such an unforgiveable bad-guy towards the beginning. And had a nice redemption story with Jill.
I'm glad that you added Jill kicking the shorter dude, because up to that point, I just kept thinking that she was too much of a damsel in distress for my liking. She loses the fight initially (not really a fight) then gets Sebastian to win the next fight, and just sits and watches. But you added that little point of badassery, which was nice, though it WAS a bit forced. Especially with only two people in the RP, try to give both characters an important role in fighting the antagonist/s. Jill kicking the smaller guy was more of an afterthought, but like I said, I'm glad you added it in.
Onto the robbers themselves - They were boring. You created this stereotypical duo, who were just downright mean for no reason. I mean they beat the shit out of some girl who they didn't even know. When you create villains this evil, it's too easy to take them down. There's no real moral ambiguity there, but you've created the opportunity by making Sebastian a character entirely capable of making hard decisions. It wasn't really a hard decision to beat these two up, though. It was easy to do, and there was no reason not to.
Another thing to bring up, is I'm not entirely sure I like bolding or italisizing all the dialogue. It just seems a little unnecessary and kind of removes the impact of it.
Sebastian West (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3
Skill: 6/7
I like what you're trying to do with Sebastian, and so I'll say keep going. You're creating a unique character (at least within PANE). Maybe I'm biased, seein' as how my main character is also a criminal. My only problem with him is that his dialogue is just really cheesy. And I get that he's trying to pull off this witty jackass kinda thing, but it really just comes off as awkward, which I don't think is intended. So I'd say your biggest thing is to work on making the dialogue a little more believable. Imagine him saying his lines, say them out loud as you type them if you need to, and think about whether or not a real person would say it, and if it would actually work.
Still, overall a good RP, good writing, and fun to read.
Battles: 5/5
Good battles! Some without pokemon, but the ones with pokemon were well done. They were concise, they were fair, and I always love to give points for incorporating PvP.
Total: 14/15
Jill Cortoma (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3
Skill: 6/7
One thing I noticed, and it's very minor, but it really stuck out to me, is that you censored yourself. "To cut a long story short, Jill had no idea why the h*ll she was blushing." I'm just not sure why you opted to say h*ll instead of "hell" or "heck." I have no problem with censoring yourself if you have a purpose in doing so. But I don't like doing it with symbols, especially with narration. If it's dialogue, then you gotta say what your character would say, and I get that, and sometimes your character might say something absolutely unforgiveable for you to type. In that case, censor it up if you feel you need to. But hell?
That's not why I deducted a point, by the way. The main reason is because, and I've already mentioned it, I wanted Jill to be just a little more involved in the overall plot of the story. She was entirely impotent against the robbers except for that 3 second add-on there at the end.
As you can see, still got 6 points, which is high. What you did with Jill, you did well. I just wanted more.
Battles: 5/5
Your battles made it very clear what was happening, who was attacking who, and the thought processes that went behind those actions. Vex disobeying orders was a nice touch. I liked that you went along with some made up mechanics, and the fights didn't drag on like PvP fights tend to do. I really think both of you did your battles extremely well, so keep it up.
Total: 14/15
Posted by: Living Arrow Sep 25 2013, 02:03 PM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=64563 is complete! (Here's one for you, Yzarc!)
Participants:
Living Arrow as http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=4110&st=0&p=41491&#entry41491
Kamaitachi as http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=52867
Master Houndoom as http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=50054
Summary (click to showhide)
The four trainers listed above arrive at the Bouquet of Bonnies breeding center - a place where Grass-type Pokémon are bred and associated research is conducted. Darryn and Cesc have a friendly battle outside the center only to find that Darryn's Cleffa, Lima, has gone missing. He sends his Jolteon, Romeo, to search for her. Branwys's Cubone, Dimo, also goes in search of the baby Pokémon.
In the meantime, the trainers enter the center, finding it to be completely turned over on the inside. Hiding in a cupboard, the group find a kid named Bobby who is the child of the breeding center's owners. He claims that certain Pokémon destroyed his house and took his parents - Carnivine that are sensitive to light.
Cesc, Darryn and Branwys go in search of the breeders while Lyla stays back to look after Bobby.
In the woods, Romeo and Dimo fall foul of a Carnivine attack while a mysterious wild Pokémon befriends the Cubone and helps him to combat the grass types.
The trainers find themselves losing light in the forest as night draws in and the Carnivine attack once more. The group fights them off, finding the unconscious forms of Bobby's parents in the midst of it all. Back at the breeding center, Lyla discovers the real cause of the Carnivines' aggression and sends a psychic message to Darryn to return to the center.
The trainers arrive back at the center in (almost) one piece where Lyla washes them clean of the Rage Powder that they are covered in which should lower the Carnivines' anger towards them. Even so, the trainers battle the remaining foe Pokémon and return the breeders to the center in one piece.
Key Notes (click to showhide)
Darryn
Lima evolved from Cleffa into Clefairy
Darryn caught a shiny Sawsbuck and named him Hart Hotel
Lyla
Suika evolved from Azurill into Marill
Cesc
None? Er... He got Contest inspiration!
Branwys
Caught a Scraggy
Sent Tinka the Klink home (the poor thing was traumatised!)
Posted by: Yzarc Drowsnam Sep 25 2013, 04:54 PM
I'll take it!
Posted by: Yzarc Drowsnam Oct 26 2013, 12:46 AM
In the Shadows
Okay guys, I know I took a while to get back to you. Hopefully it'll have been worth the wait.
First thing I wanna say, is the overall plot was great. The tone was really well done throughout the entire RP - The mystery combined with fear in the early stages as the group explored the house, and then the adventurous part as the team goes out into the woods. Then the realization that they're dealing with something so powerful they might not stand a chance.
I think the only thing that would have really sealed it for me would be if someone actually died. But I totally understand why you didn't want to go in that direction.
Another thing I really loved is how split the team got. The rule for survival in scary stories is to never split up the party, ever ever, but the rule for writing them is to always split up the party, every time, never keep them together. It's interesting seeing how various pokemon and people act around each other in one-on-one situations, or by themselves.
Lyla and Darryn, aside from the initial battle between he and Cesc, had very little interaction with Branwys and Cesc. I'm not putting the blame on Darryn by any means, it's not his fault he's a third wheel. But, fortunately, he's a very important third wheel, since he's basically party leader. He was the Harry to their Ron and Hermione. That said, I still would have liked to see more interaction between the players. I understand why it didn't happen, but I still disagree.
I wanna talk about pokemon text/speech for a second, because I have a few concerns about what we're doing with it. For starters, MH, you GOTTA stay away from bright yellow text. Personally, I'm not a huge fan of colored text in the first place. I don't believe it really has a positive impact on the reader, but I understand it's fun to do as a writer. Not gonna tell you to stop using colors for speech, but pls no yellow text. team, pls.
Another thing to bring up is the accents that a few pokemon (Dimo and Romeo) seem to have. This is something I actually sat back and had to think to myself about. I understand why, conceptually, the accents are there. It's a neat way of adding some character to the pokemon. But it really just doesn't make sense to me. I mean, they're not speaking English anyway, the whole pokemon speech thing is a translation into English by you, the writer. So why are you translating it in to something which is so hard to read?
And honestly, it really bothers me that pokemon of different species can perfectly understand one another, even moreso than a pokemon and its trainer (unless its trainer is a psychic I guess). How can Dimo communicate more effectively with Romeo than with Branwys? It doesn't make sense. This isn't on you guys. It's canon, I get that. But it's stupid. It's like saying "Everything that isn't like us is basically the same," which is problematic.
Anyway, let's get to the good stuff. I'm not gonna go into too much individual detail per player at this point, since I went kinda ham in the first part.
Darryn (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3
Skillz that Killz: 7/7
Try to work on Lyla's use of the word "like." I will say that it's getting way better than the first few RPs I read with Lyla, but there are still times when it comes off as forced, or awkward, and I feel like it kinda breaks her character. An example:
“So, what do we, like, do now?”
The problem here, in my opinion, and feel free to disagree since it's all opinion, is that "What do we do now?" is a common enough thing that is said so that it doesn't require a pause. Once you start to ask that question, you know exactly how you're going to finish it. "Like" should be used to fill a pause kinda like "uhh" or "umm." I think if she were to say "So, like, what do we do now?" it would come off as a little more natural. That being said, it's your character, not mine.
I really do love Lyla, btw. Much more than Darryn. I didn't really like Darryn in this RP. Which is great! Not everyone oozes likability. I think he would have come across as less of a dick if he were to actually be friendly with Branwys, but there was virtually zero interaction between him and her. And for whatever reason, I blame Darryn. Maybe I'm just bigoted for not blaming Branwys for that. (I want to be clear that this part isn't a gripe, just an observation)
Battle: 5/5
Darryn's ability to prioritize during battle is great, and I really like that Lima didn't quite understand why he was battling so hardcore, rather than battling pretty like he normally does. At every turn, it was evident that Darryn was in control of the situation, even when he briefly lost control. He plays the hero magnificently, and you portray it very well.
Total: 15/15
Branwys (click to showhide)
Precipitation: 3/3
Skill: 7/7
Man, the relationship between her and Cesc is like a goddamn roller coaster. I really like how you portray her insecurities, especially at the beginning when Cesc mentions how good looking everyone is, and she just assumes he was excluding her. But then she never calls him out on it, so he never gets to clarify which is so sad!!
And I really liked this little piece:
QUOTE
All of her life she struggled against the reality of her size. It shouldn't
matter that she was three feet tall. She could do anything a full sized person
could do.
Except that she couldn't.
Of course, she goes on to prove herself, but it had to include this bit of self doubt. I really appreciate how well you know your character, especially considering how different from you I assume she is.
Okay but seriously. No yellow text. Pls team.
BATTORU: 5/5
Branny definitely proves herself to be the weakest battler on the team, but manages to hold her own when it counts. The way you wrote her battles really captured the futility she felt during the final stages. Her pokemon were too weak or hurt to be of use, and this went back to her own insecurities. Scraggy to the fuckin' rescue, though.
Total: 15/15
Cesc (click to showhide)
Perspiration: 3/3
Skill: 7/7
Cesc is so cool. He really doesn't give a fuck what other people think - He do what he do. He has nice little quips, so I gotta say it's nice being able to see your fun and upbeat writing since I'm so used to Tag these days (Tag may be smarter than Cesc, but Cesc is wittier).
Sometimes he's nonchalance comes off as kinda douchey. But that kinda comes with the territory I suppose.
One thing I'd say is that sometimes Cesc says something kind of unnatural, in an attempt to be funny. Like, he'll say a little quip, and your first reaction is to smile, and then you think "would a person have actually said that, though?" He reminds me a little of Mal in Firefly. I guess Whedon's rule is that it's okay to have a character say something unrealistic if it's funny. From what I can tell at least. He's a little more successful than me, so keep it up I suppose.
I feel like I'm rambling. It's getting late. Almost done, though.
Battle: 5/5
Cesc clearly idolizes Darryn, which is really cool, and you take that to a fantastic level. At every turn, his entire strategy is actually sort of Darryn-centric. That moment toward the end, when Bravo created the Whirlwind, and Cesc tried to incorporate Fire Spin into it. It was a great idea, but ultimately unnecessary as the Whirlwind was capable of doing its job by itself. The only reason to do it was for show.
So, Cesc can't make the distinction and prioritize like Darryn can. Darryn's strategy during these actual fights (not contests) are vastly different from his contest battles. But Cesc doesn't change up his strategy. To add to this, the Fire Spin fails, which is a great way to give Cesc the opportunity to see that not only was it not strong enough, but it was largely unnecessary, just for show, and kind of a waste of time. I think he learned a lot from that one little moment.
Total: 15/15
Posted by: Umbrae Calamitas Nov 3 2013, 09:48 PM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=62809&st=0 is finally complete!
Start Date: March 6, 2012
End Date: November 3, 2013
Length: 35 posts (as for the length of the individual posts, I'm not sorry :P)
Participants:
Master Houndoom - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=3869(partner: Meiko Omura)
Umbrae Calamitas - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=52894&hl= (partner: Reilly Coons)
Summary: Tuesday has split of from Meiko and Jaima to perform her first bit of official field work as a research assistant. While she travels with her pokemon, Meiko and Jaima attend a Pokemon Convention at Starfall Fields. When Tuesday is forced to send Dante to Professor Oak as a sort of time-out, she continues her travels with a partial new set of pokemon, learning more about their antics, prompting the search for a name rater for one. Meanwhile, Jaima and Meiko travel with some leisure after the PokeCon, enjoying each others company, rescuing random strangers, and finding themselves together at a wedding.
When Tuesday meets up with Reilly by chance upon the road, a battle with a tyrannitar sends them both into an underground cavern after the great reptile's earthquake attack. There, they wake up in a fantastical place, guests of the Fae King and Queen, who have called them for their help to slay a dragon, since that is what Reilly and Tuesday have done for years, traveling the world as dragonslayers.
Confusion, psychic brainwashing, failures and betrayals have the two fleeing the realm of the Fae, seeking aid in Anthro Town, a place that Tuesday had once planned to visit with Meiko, back when the girl was still alive.
A fact complicated by stumbling upon she and Jaima just outside of town. Once realizing that a psychic brainwashing has occurred, along with the kidnapping of Zorro, Tuesday's riolu, the four of them make their way back to the Fae Kingdom to right more than one wrong.
It won't be easy.
Posted by: Living Arrow Nov 4 2013, 02:06 PM
Changing of the Guard
No surprises here
Tuesday 15/15 (click to showhide)
Damn, Tuesday’s read way too many books about dragons! The plot for her was interesting and it really captured the different sides of her that were soft and hard. Her actions were well thought out and I enjoyed reading the different ways in which she coped with strong emotions.
It was great to see Tuesday struggle for a change. I know that sounds odd but she is actually a very talented trainer for her age and relative inexperience so seeing her battle with the conflict within her team showed off really just how fragile she can be. Even so, Tuesday’s will is so strong that she never falters from the track of her character and fought through the clashes between Dante and the others impressively.
It was so weird and cool to see how Tuesday and Reilly would have developed if they had lived in some fantasy world without Team Rogue! I have to admit, it threw me completely at first but I soon realised what was going on and enjoyed their more mature interaction.
It will be very interesting to see where Tuesday goes from here.
Involvement 3/3
Skill 7/7
Battle 5/5 (At one point in the fight I did think: ‘Ashleigh’s mega stone is reacting to Tuesday’s mega ring!’)
Jaima 15/15 (click to showhide)
Oh my god… I LOVE that Nightwish’s speech impediment didn’t go away when she evolved. Her character is quite enthralling and her relationship with Mercury is captivating whenever they speak (your dialogue is amazeballs). In fact, M and N stole the show for a fair part of the roleplay – in the most fantastical way possible, might I add. Normally, I’d not like that the trainers fell to the background for longer sections but Jaima and Meiko had such brilliant interaction throughout on that it was easy to forget that they almost disappeared here and there.
VOMIT GIRL! YES!
Speaking of Meiko, I’m really looking forward to Jaima meeting Toshiro XD This storyline is proving to be quite a powerful near-adult-themed thread that is executed perfectly within the boundaries of our community rules.
Involvement 3/3
Skill 7/7
Battle 5/5
Posted by: Douken Sota Nov 26 2013, 05:17 PM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=69349&st=0 is finally done. It WAS supposed to be a simple thread, allowing new players to met up and get in some small brawls before going to see what they were getting themselves ready for: gym battles. However, Skyler and Hunter soon went MIA and Kazuki's computer crashed. yes, Me and Kazuki did have some issues at the beginning getting on, but it was mainly because of the network we were working on making us unable to get on, having to rely on hotspots to get connected.
However, what did went as planned was Douken's Gym Battle. Unfortunately, this turned into a loss for the Amazon as he wanted to see how well he could of done with a Dragon instead of his more experienced and versatile ghost. However, Douken was showing quite an unusual fainting spell on him. Maybe next time we can see why.
Posted by: Master Houndoom Nov 27 2013, 11:48 AM
My Gigarte is neither grieving nor gentling very well...
First, the bad news: SWEDSH, BanalityPanda, and Shiro Azuma did not make the requisite amount of posts in order for me to properly give them levels. I realize real life happens, but there is a standard of 10 posts minimum to grade. Other than Douken, none of the others made that.
Now, for Douken: 15/15 (click to showhide)
Participation: 3 levels. I believe that is self explanatory.
Battle: 5 levels. This RP turned into a long, gym battle for you. You lost, but you fought well, and except for one thing I could not find any fault in tactics. I will detail that a bit below.
Skill: 7 levels. You were there, you did your best to move the story. Some posts were a little on the short side, but I know the frustration of trying to post for length with nothing to go on. You tried to draw others into the posts. Your battle with Chloe was easy to track.
I would like to say, as a note for everyone who reads this, it can be easy to fall into the trap of letting your character know what he or she should not know. I have done it, and I don't typically bring it up unless there is an egregious break in believability. I believe that there was one in Douken's understanding what Serperior's ability was. There was nothing to indicate that the ability was in place. Neither pokemon attacked with a move that lowered ability, and the Sun disappearing from Sunny Day wouldn't have affected Serperior, as he is unaffected by it in either way (and Contrary does not change boosts retroactively). As Chloe pointed out, Contrary would be rare (it's a hidden ability). I docked no points, but please keep an eye out for it.
Kamaitachi: ∞/∞ (click to showhide)
Chloe receives infinite levels, as she's a gym leader and... needs... more levels.
Posted by: Kamaitachi Mar 16 2014, 11:50 PM
It's been a year and a half for this RP, so I figured it was time to wrap it up. My apologies for the double post at the end, but I kinda hoped that three months between my last post and this one would somewhat forgive it.
That being said, I give you: http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=65080&st=0
Starring:
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=46005&view=findpost&p=1398044- http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=9558&view=findpost&p=1399982
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=64576&view=findpost&p=2238346- http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=9558&view=findpost&p=2238677
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=65085&st=0&p=2247797&#entry2247797- http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=9558&st=40&p=2247987&#entry2247987
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=37696- http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=9558&view=findpost&p=1068240
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=66982 - http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=9558&view=findpost&p=2296102
QUOTE(Notable Happenings)
Adelaide caught a Gastly. which ran away. Adelaide was supposed to catch a Joltik, but I don't think that ever happened. Adelaide befriended a Shiny Cranidos.
Tag catches a Mienfoo.
Tag's Tobi evolves into Ninetales.
QUOTE(A Summary)
A group of poachers using a cloud of Gastly to lure Pokemon away is encountered by the various travelers. Liz and Tag meet up as her Riolu, Ryan, is lured away. Walten stumbles across the duo looking for Liz's Pokemon, and reveals that his Klink has also gone missing. Finally, Adelaide joins the team, noting that her Mantyke is also missing. After an encounter with the Gastly group, the team decides to rest up at a Pokemon Center, resuming their search in the morning, while Tag has one of his Pokemon tracking.
In the morning, Tag and Adelaide set out to follow the trail, and assault the poacher base deep in the woods. The Pokemon are rescued, and they return to the Pokemon Center, victorious.
Posted by: Toogee Mar 25 2014, 08:24 AM
Hello Beasties: Review of “The Baleful Beast of the Beauteous Baccate Backcountry”
This was probably the most eclectic bunch of people thrown together into an RP. Unfortunately, everyone seemed to be plagued with problems that killed the RP several times. Fun while it lasted.
Zapi only made two posts, so I didn’t have enough to grade.
Taggarty Lee- Kamaitachi (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
"That's quite the battle-cry. Consider me mortified."
Skill: 7/7
I like how Tag’s weakness was revealed: teary eyed people (particularly kids) in desperation. He’s like putty in their hands. :P
Battle: 5/5.
You practically ran many of the battles, so full marks.
Total: 15/15
Liz Shir- Dragonwish (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 2/3
“…the lack of ominous screams or flame made her less eager to run like a maniac.”
(Even though you had good participation, you’re also the leader of the RP. I know real life takes priority, but a quick sentence in the discussion board letting everyone know that you dropped would be helpful. That way, people aren’t waiting nine months for you to advance the plot.)
Skill: 7/7
Favorite moment was when she screamed in terror of Tag’s face.
Battle: 4/5
Liked the flashy moves against the gastly. That sets her up as a coordinator.
Total: 13/15
Adelaide Robinson- colourcodedchaos (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 1/3
" I just hold severe reservations about putting sentient beings in something the size of a largish peach. Blame my dastardly liberal upbringing."
(You only had eight posts in this RP out of the required 10 for grading. I went ahead and graded anyways, but it would have been cool if Adelaide stuck around for the end.)
Skill: 7/7
Certainly the weirdest character in PANE. Admittedly, I had no idea how this character was going to work in this world, but Adelaide adapted fairly well in this RP.
Battle: 5/5
Even if you weren’t there for the last battle, you had your own battle with the mantyke’s escape that made up for it.
Total: 13/15
Walten Humme- Soos (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 2/3
“Must be some sort of weird amnesia thing.”
Skill: 6/7
It’s quite an adjustment playing the oldest character in the RP. It’s fun to read his interactions with people young enough to be his own kids. There are times where Walten acts a little too old for his age, that could be a side effect of his amnesia (doesn’t remember his age?).
Battle: 2/5
There’s only one battle post to base this on. It’s very brief too, so I can’t give full marks for this.
Total: 10/15
Posted by: 7eeveelutions Apr 24 2014, 01:40 AM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=70504 has finally been wrapped up. First roleplay here on GTS+, I feel so accomplished!
It mainly starred http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=9558&pid=2361566&st=40&#entry2361566 and http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=9558&st=0&p=1680785&#entry1680785, with some posts from http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=9558&st=0&p=434584&#entry434584 during the first half.
It started with Scott interrupting Cesc and Tikal from doing a battle, and progressed through a meeting with a Wild Absol that led the group to a Ranger Station that had been broken into, which led the group (minus Tikal) to a cave full of evolution stones that was guarded by poachers, ending with a battle with a Mega Absol before Cesc and Scott parted ways.
Cesc's Chimchar, Valentine, evolved into a
Posted by: Living Arrow Apr 25 2014, 07:49 AM
Grading: Broken Stars
Hi all – Sorry for the wait. Looks like I got interrupted partway through reading and grading this thread so I forgot all about it. If I ever keep anyone waiting like that again, please PM to bug me.
On another note… SO MANY BATTLES!
Cesc – 15/15 (click to showhide)
For all Co-Ordinators I think it is important to show “off screen training” on screen so that Contest Appeals have some reference to go on rather than miraculously spring out of nothing. Cesc does this regularly, which pleases me, and it’s even better to see some of his ideas fail instead of being presented with a perfect Appeal off the bat. This makes him feel human and altogether a real person rather than a roleplay character of teh awesomes.
Participation: 3/3
Skill: 7/7
In any roleplay it is easy to become blinkered with your own character’s desires and abilities but you never fall into the trap of seductive heroism. I love the way to reference so many other characters in PANE and love even more the way in which you respond to your co-roleplayers’ posts.
Battles: 5/5
Awesome battling, as always.
Scott – 14/15 (click to showhide)
I really like the effective way in which you show off the bond between Scott and his/ Pokemon – a feeling of family is offered up when we see how Scott speaks to his Pokemon. I have to admit that I was surprised when Scott allowed Ruby to just challenge Oberon to a fight but that could be a rookie ranger decision more than anything else. I really got the feeling that Scott was a fledgling ranger with not too much experience under his belt since he kept referring to his training but that’s a good thing – it makes him feel all the more real for not being perfect.
Participation: 3/3
Skill: 6/7
Although I really liked most of what you wrote, I felt like there were “o rly?” where Scott somehow knew something that he shouldn’t have or suggested something that wouldn’t really be the natural assumption. For example, when he first referred to the cave he called it “the elemental stone cave” and then rapidly followed up by claiming he didn’t know that one existed. I was also surprised to read the Scott had heard about Mega Evolution…
Battle: 5/5
Nice battles! I really appreciated how Scott was aware of his own Pokemon’s limitations and was not too proud to fall into a support role when his battle partner had higher levelled, more experienced ‘mons.
Tikal – 4/15 (click to showhide)
Wow! Tikal introduced us to a song (via youtube) which puts some extra ‘umph’ into any post. Truth be told, I absolutely love when songs or images are used during roleplays to capture the interest of the reader. I’m not sure about the song’s relevance, however… Was there a special reason whey you picked that song for her?
Since you dropped out after only 6 posts I don’t think it would be fair to fully grade you on skill because it wouldn’t be fair on the others. Then again, I’m not so cold-hearted to deny points for your posts since they were written well and deserved some credit:
Participation: 1/3
Skill: 3/7
Battles: 0/5
Posted by: Living Arrow May 11 2014, 12:03 PM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=66978&st=20&start=20 is complete!
Participants:
Living Arrow as http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=50056
LittleShadowPokemon as http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=16100
Summary (click to showhide)
Lori Pardare preps herself for her Gym mtch vs Maxy Z! of Fidona while Joey Sweet contemplates his new career as a Co-ordinator. Together, they traverse the challenges that lead to the Fidona Gym where Lori has an unsuccessful an absolute trouncing at the hands of the Leader.
Returning to town, Lori has a mini-bout of depression for her loss before agreeing to half-heartedly help Joey train for Context battling. Soon after, she leaves to attend the Petropolis Grand Invitational.
Key Notes (click to showhide)
LoriTriss tried and failed to evolve during the Gym match.
JoeyClaw
evolved to
Posted by: Toogee Jun 15 2014, 06:53 AM
Hadn't realized this was up. This will be quick:
Lori: 15/15
Poor girl needs a victory at some point. Great gym battle though.
Joey: 13/25
Had to dock off for participation. Points are waiting if you choose to return
Posted by: Toogee Jul 24 2014, 04:52 PM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=71240 is complete and ready for binge reading.
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?s=&showtopic=9558&view=findpost&p=2128025- Toogee
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=9558&st=0&p=2361566&#entry2361566- 7eeveelutions
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=9558&view=findpost&p=2311664- Hydra
Summary (click to showhide)
Darius is haunted by a telepath who narrates his every move and thought back to him unless he finds him. The constant wandering leads him to Loch Ranch, where he proceeds to (unsuccessfully) go after any pokemon he so much as suspects is the culprit. This prompts a call for local rangers Scott and Amber to investigate. Battles ensue, enemies are amde, and the true identity of the Narrator is revealed!
Stuff That Happened (click to showhide)
Charmeleon's Darius Darius's Charmander evolved into Charmeleon!
Scott caught a Leafeon!
Probably other stuff, but spoilers.
Posted by: Kamaitachi Jul 29 2014, 01:32 PM
I'll take this!
Posted by: Kamaitachi Aug 20 2014, 08:10 PM
The Voice in My Head!
Sorry it took so long!
I've been very busy as of late, so I hope you don't mind the shortened scores.
Darius Dovakin - Toogee (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3, and what an excellent thread runner you are!
Skill: 7/7, I really enjoyed the writing style of this one, especially with everything coming from "The Narrarator"! This was one of the most refreshing and unique rp styles I'd yet encountered. I'm curious to see where the story of Grandmaster Beed goes
Battle: Perhaps there was a little more going on with Darius vs Pokemon rather than Pokemon battling, but Bindy did her thing quite nicely enough to warrant full marks, even if each of the skirmishes were short.
Total: 15/15
Scott Carson - 7eeveelutions (click to showhide)
Participation: 3/3, you stayed to the end!
Skill: 7/7 Scott's Ranger skills and history are coming out more and more, which I enjoy. The introduction of Amber is nice, in that she's not brought in with loads of exposition, and you're able to figure out their relationship simply through their dialogue, which is quite nice. I also, for some reason, liked that Amber left midway through the rp, giving you more time to focus on Scott. I notice that sometimes partners tend to take the spotlight away from the primary characters, which is fine...but I like that Scott remains the focus and that Amber is there to highlight him.
Battle: 5/5 - I would caution against overusing Amber's "pokemon summoning" ability. I know that's not what it's supposed to be, but man, summoning a fleet of Pokemon can easily turn any battle into a lopsided affair. Drumming up a bunch of high level Pokemon can easily be misused. It would bring me greater comfort if perhaps next time Amber did a distress call like that, only one or two pokemon showed up. Obviously, this is not of GREAT importance, as it didn't cost you any points
Total: 15/15
Sebastian West - Hydra (click to showhide)
Participation: 1/3 Man. You sure did disappear. I really wish you'd stick around for an entire rp one of these days. You would get much higher scores.
Skill: 7/7 If it's any consolation, your writing has improved greatly. Each post you write shows your growth as a writer and as an rper. Seb's an interesting character, in that he's not your typical protagonist. I found myself irritated at his want to simply abandon Magby and Elekid, but it did seem to fit his character. If I may make a suggestion for improvement? I sense a clunkiness in your writing in terms of flow, and I don't quite have the words to explain it. Perhaps its the order in which Seb's thoughts and actions occur, as well as descriptions of what's going on around him. May I suggest making a little skeleton for each post? So that you know in which order to go? I'd be happy to explain more via PM.
Battles: 0/5 No battles, no points.
Total: 8/15
Posted by: Kamaitachi Aug 20 2014, 08:20 PM
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=71145&st=0 has wrapped up!
Dramatis Personae:
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=71117, played by A Kitty Cat
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=71161, played by Huntress Wizard
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=50056, played by Living Arrow
&
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=37696, as himself played by Kamaitachi
Summary:
A group of trainers independently arrive at Port Barley, all of whom have the intention of traveling to Fidona. However, they each find that they've missed the most recent ferry for one reason or another, and end up bumming around Port Barley a little bit.
Lori challenges Tag to a battle, while Marwan and Roxxy engage in one of their own.
After a trip to the pokemon center, the four unwittingly gel into a little group all traveling to the ferry together. The social interactions are a bit awkward. However, as they approach the ferry, they're stopped by a group of men in suits who apparently have beef with Tag. Tag tries to get the others in the group to get on the ferry and go, but they're intercepted by other men in suits. A fierce battle ensues.
They ultimately win (with Tag's Enka evolving into an Ampharos), and board the ferry to set off to Fidona.
Posted by: Toogee Sep 19 2014, 09:54 AM
Now Boarding: Review of “Gathering at the Gateway”
This was a good first RP for our newcomers as well as a nice adventure for the vets. Tag’s desire to be a teacher was pretty evident as he went easy on Lori (initially). Roxi pulled no punches in her interactions, while Marwan’s awkwardness was in stark contrast to the social skills of many other trainers (this is a good thing).
Only thing I could add: Try and use the discussion thread for OOC chat.
Marwan McGuiness- A Kitty Cat (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
“Sorry. I'll stop apologizing now. Sorry.”
Skill: 7/7
I love his awkwardness around the girls. I look forward to more of his interactions.
Battle: 5/5.
Everyone got in two battles, both of which were fairly detailed. No complaints here.
Total: 15/15
Roxanne "Roxxy" Mauden- Huntress Wizard (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
“…if I were you, I would not be poking fun at the girl who's lived on the streets since she was ten. That's not very smart of you, I thought you knew better? Disappointing.”
Skill: 7/7
. Trainer from the streets who’s not willing to hold back on her words or battles. This could get interesting.
Battle: 5/5
Everyone got in two battles, both of which were fairly detailed. No complaints here.
Total: 15/15
Lori Pardare- Living Arrow (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
" *Oh, God! What do I do!? This guy’s probably some sort of crazy cut-your-fingers-off-because-you-crossed-me types!* "
Skill: 7/7
Lori’s relationship with her sister was one of my favorite parts. I look forward to more Kino cameos.
Battle: 5/5
Everyone got in two battles, both of which were fairly detailed. No complaints here.
Total: 15/15
Taggarty Lee- Kamaitachi (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
“ …there was something comforting about the fact that none of them were trying to kill him.”
Skill: 7/7
With the way he battles, are we sure Tag isn’t a coordinator deep down? Good stuff as always.
Battle: 5/5
Everyone got in two battles, both of which were fairly detailed. No complaints here.
Total: 15/15
Posted by: 7eeveelutions Mar 22 2015, 08:59 PM
After more than half of a year, http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=71750 is finally finished!
Members-
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=70196
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=71552
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=52049
http://forums.gtsplus.net/index.php?showtopic=67811
Summary-
Everyone is travelling through the Fidona island rainforests, and they all meet up with the same group of poachers separately. The lead poacher is someone Scott faced back in his first RP, who owns a Mega Absol. The poachers catch Scott and Lucie and torture Scott, while Scott's Espeon escapes and leads Kaya and Seb to the poacher base where a huge battle breaks out.
Key things-
Seb catches a Cranidos and releases his Magby/Elekid (I think)
Scott's Vulpix (Ruby) evolves into a Ninetales directly after the roleplay ends
Posted by: Toogee Mar 23 2015, 06:23 AM
I'll take it, but it might be a while.
Posted by: Toogee Apr 4 2015, 10:01 AM
Rumble in the Jungle: Review of “Escape to the Amazon”
In this RP, Scott and Lucie get captured by poachers. Scott’s pokemon manage to cause havoc, while Scarlet get Kaya and Seb to engage on a different front. Their alliance seemed to be short lived; I’m not sure Kaya and Scott said goodbye or thanks after all of this. Maybe next time perhaps?
Now, onto scores;
Scott Carson- 7eeveelutions (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
“The day he captured me, Scott had trouble dealing with some insane guy who had a great big sword. He thought it looked cool, so he bought one. I think it's stupid, but whatever.”
Skill: 7/7
Talk about a happy reunion! Scott took a backseat to his pokemon in this RP. We got to see how they act without Scott’s orders. They weren’t big on teamwork, so they have some kinks to work out in their training.
I like Ebony and Scarlet developing their new skillset. Being Eevees before, they’re still getting the hang of their sudden inheritance.
Battle: 5/5.
Oodles of battles.
Total: 15/15
Lucie Hauchecorne- Darkrow (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 2/3
“Am I dead? Am… Am I in Hell? Is this what Hell is like…? It’s so hot and gross… I don’t want to rot here…”
Skill: 7/7
It’s hard to play as someone that’s not the typical teen trainer with ideal body image. I commend you for breaking out of the norm. This was a great debut for Lucie. She hasn’t gotten over being spoiled despite her impoverished lifestyle. I hope you come back so we can see whether she grows out of it.
Battle: 3/5
We saw a brief battle early. It’s understandable that they didn’t keep fighting during the breakout; Lucie’s pokemon are also a little spoiled. As they grow, they should be able to hold their own.
Total: 12/15
Kaya Rovera- Firepower (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 3/3
"My name is Kaya. Please stop calling me little girl."
Skill: 7/7
I really like how she leaves Oran berries for enemy pokemon. No one ever really thinks about getting into trouble with the law, yet Kaya was considering it before every move. The very definition of innocence. Just make sure she gets more berries; who knows how many other foes she’s going to have to heal!
Battle: 4/5
Battles were appropriate for a beginning trainer like Kaya. Her second battle was a little brief from what I could tell, mostly because she was worried about escaping in one piece. Totally understandable. As her pokemon gain levels, she’ll get better at holding her own.
Total: 14/15
Sebastian West- Hydra (click to showhide)
Participation/Activity: 2/3
"You hyperactive piece of shit baboon, you want to pick a fight then bring it on you little bitch!"
Skill: 7/7
I can’t believe it. Seb actually softened up a bit in this RP! In the face of his own mortality (and the prospect of crossing the law again), he stopped being the tough guy we usually see him as. Very interesting. Hoping he comes back to see where that takes him.
Battle: 5/5
I like your little summaries of the battles. It really helped keep track of everything happening.
Total: /15
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