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Don Crall, Profile Application
R3ignlasting
post Apr 11 2010, 11:30 AM
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Name: Don Crall

Age: 13

Hometown: Vermillion City, Kanto


Appearance:
Tanish skin, mostly because of tanning back in Vermillion City. His hair is short and black, his bangs hang down to his eyebrows, and his eyes are a dark blue. His last skin feature is a large scar on the side of his face that was obtained from when he was 9 years old when he fell off his mini dirt bike and skid down the street.

Usually, Don wears tight black faded jeans, and a loose white tank top. He has an earring on his right ear. His shoes are black and white "Nike" like shoes. When it's cold out, Don wears a leather coat on top of his tank top, and the rest of his normal clothes.

I will have a sprite soon.

Personality: Somewhat stubborn when it comes to questions and facts. Don is easily angered, but most of the time, he is cool and smooth. Don likes scary stuff, but mostly he likes a good comedy time. He has never liked the feeling of being in a small space, so I guess you could call him claustrophobic. In a Pokemon battle, he tries his hardest to keep his Pokemon comfortable, but strong and intimidating at the same time. Around other people, he is confident and walks around proudly. With his head up high.

Biography:
Don's Childhood was a great time for him, and was also a sad time. From 2-10, Don's grandparents had died, and his Uncle passed away. He was raised in a great home, with a loving family. A little sister, Tanya, and a big sister, Heather.

It was almost Don's birthday, and at the age of 12, Don asked his mother and father if he could move to another region, to become a Pokemon Trainer. His big sister, Heather trained to become a great Pokemon Trainer, so he used that in his argument to persuade his parents into letting him do this. Finally, his parents gave in and let him become a trainer. Then, one day, his parents called Heather to come down to Vermillion, and to give Don the Pokemon she just bred. When Don woke up on his Birthday, he got up and saw Heather. She gave him a hug, and congratulated him on becoming a teenager. Then, she gave him his present. A newly bred, Jolly Pichu. Heather asked him what Don wanted to name it, and Don suggested "Spark." That's how Don got to know his partner, Pichu. Heather inspired him to become a trainer, and that's why he asked.

Don was always the popular kid growing up, the one with the most friends in School. He was a super athlete, and was in Student Council. If a friend of his was ever sad, he would try to cheer them up by telling him or her a joke. He also has a girlfriend named Kristin. When he enrolled himself in Student Council for his small school, he instantly became the Headmaster of it. He wrote the headlines of the school newspaper. In Student Council, that's where he met Kristin. Kristin DeChene was the light of his life. He asked her out, and she said yes, like it was a chore of hers. After the date at the movies, she got to know Don better, and they went out more often. Every week or they usually hung out at least every day. Then, when he told Kristin that he was going to become a Pokemon trainer in Furoh, she gave him a going away hug and kiss, and a Poke Ball. Don asked what was in it. She said, "An Igglybuff. My favorite Pokemon" with tears in her eyes. She also said that it was named Kristy, to remember her and keep her in Don's memory.

After Don's parents gave into him, they also arranged a ferry to carry him across the sea to Fidona, a small island not far away from the coast of the rest of Furoh.

Starting Pokemon: Pichu named Spark Lv. 5, and an Igglybuff named Kristy Lv. 5.

Items: $3,000 and a loaf of bread given to him by his mother that will never go bad.

The biscuit's name is Waldorf.

Other Notes: Nope, none at all.


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Toogee
post Apr 11 2010, 11:54 AM
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Appearance: I would like to see more colors. Hair color? Eye color? Clothing colors?

Personality: Move all the Bio stuff into the Bio and give me more personality. Interests/Dislikes? How is he around people? What about with pokemon and during pokemon battles?

Bio: Why did Don want to become a pokemon trainer? Why did he want to go to Furoh out of all the other regions? Was there a major event in his life that led to these decisions?

Starting Pokemon: You need at least two in total. Please list their levels; they can't go higher than a total of 20.

Overall, good start, but I want expansion. happy.gif


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R3ignlasting
post Apr 11 2010, 05:04 PM
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I don't have lots of time to edit my post, so I'll tell you the rest of the stuff. I was in a hurry this morning when I wrote this, too. I had to go out to dinner.

Well, his eye color is a simple dark blue. His faded jeans are black. And his tank top is a pure white. His Nikes are black with a white symbol.

Don likes scary stuff, but mostly he likes a good comedy time. He has never liked the feeling of being in a small space, so I guess you could call him claustrophobic. In a Pokemon battle, he tries his hardest to keep his Pokemon comfortable, but strong and intimidating at the same time. Around other people, he is confident and walks around proudly. With his head up high.

He wanted to become a trainer to get the thrill of excitement and adventure. He also wanted a new partner. Another thing I forgot in the entire story, his father was Lt. Surge, the gym leader of Vermillion City, so he wanted to experience the feeling of being a trainer like his father and his sister. By becoming the Pokemon Master of Furoh.

I wanted to ask you this for my two starter Pokemon. If I started with my Pichu, and when I got off the boat and onto the city of Fidona. Don would walk onto the shore, and see the rest of the city. Then, he would start his journey, and he would find a Pokemon Egg on a hill near the port. I was going to tell you what it'll hatch into. But I don't want to spoil the surprise.

Hope that helps.


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Toogee
post Apr 11 2010, 06:22 PM
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I'll wait until all those details have been edited in to deliver final judgement.

However...

1. Lt. Surge cannot be Don's father. We generally don't like anyone to be related to a canon character. Lt. Surge in particular has already appeared in Furoh, so he's already astablished (aomewhat).

2. I'm iffy on the egg as a starter. You have to have two pokemon out and ready to go. You can have an egg in addition to the two starters, but that egg will have to hatch into one of the starters.

If you're talking about finding an egg on your first RP, post a capture request (or send a PM to a mod if you must). You will still need two starters though.


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R3ignlasting
post Apr 11 2010, 07:31 PM
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Okay, I edited the details in the first post.


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Toogee
post Apr 11 2010, 07:52 PM
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QUOTE(2gamers @ Apr 11 2010, 11:54 AM) *
Appearance: Hair color? Eye color?

Personality: Move all the Bio stuff into the Bio and give me more personality (The stuff on the student council and girlfriend have nothing to do with personality. Why are they there?). Interests/Dislikes? How is he around people? What about with pokemon and during pokemon battles?

Bio: Why did Don want to become a pokemon trainer? Why did he want to go to Furoh out of all the other regions? Was there a major event in his life that led to these decisions?

Starting Pokemon: Please list their levels; they can't go higher than a total of 20.

Overall, good start, but I want expansion. happy.gif

These things still need to be included. A lot of them are listed in your previous posts.


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R3ignlasting
post Apr 13 2010, 02:47 PM
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QUOTE(2gamers @ Apr 11 2010, 08:52 PM) *
QUOTE(2gamers @ Apr 11 2010, 11:54 AM) *
Appearance: Hair color? Eye color?

Personality: Move all the Bio stuff into the Bio and give me more personality (The stuff on the student council and girlfriend have nothing to do with personality. Why are they there?). Interests/Dislikes? How is he around people? What about with pokemon and during pokemon battles?

Bio: Why did Don want to become a pokemon trainer? Why did he want to go to Furoh out of all the other regions? Was there a major event in his life that led to these decisions?

Starting Pokemon: Please list their levels; they can't go higher than a total of 20.

Overall, good start, but I want expansion. happy.gif

These things still need to be included. A lot of them are listed in your previous posts.


It's been completed for a while. I've just been forgetting to tell you that.


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Toogee
post Apr 13 2010, 06:21 PM
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OK, how about hair, eye color? They're still missing.

Again, the whole paragraph on the student council and girlfriend belongs in the biography section. It's great that you expanded it; it makes his bio that much stronger. However, this only leaves two sentences about his personality. Expand that.

List the levels for your pokemon. Explain where he got the igglybuff.

Here's the stuff you proposed, please edit these things in your profile:

QUOTE
I don't have lots of time to edit my post, so I'll tell you the rest of the stuff. I was in a hurry this morning when I wrote this, too. I had to go out to dinner.

Well, his eye color is a simple dark blue. His faded jeans are black. And his tank top is a pure white. His Nikes are black with a white symbol.

Don likes scary stuff, but mostly he likes a good comedy time. He has never liked the feeling of being in a small space, so I guess you could call him claustrophobic. In a Pokemon battle, he tries his hardest to keep his Pokemon comfortable, but strong and intimidating at the same time. Around other people, he is confident and walks around proudly. With his head up high.


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R3ignlasting
post Apr 14 2010, 08:10 PM
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Okay, I edited the post once again. It's good this time. No more problems.


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Toogee
post Apr 14 2010, 08:45 PM
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Approved. Post in the Current Levels Thread. Have fun!


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