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Arden Mauser, I know this place is a bit dead but i really wanted to join
SacredHeart
post Jun 20 2014, 03:57 PM
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Name: Arden Kayleigh Mauser

Age: 17 (Born August 24th)

Hometown: Snowpoint City,Sinnoh

Appearance:
Arden is 5 foot 4 and weighs 120lbs. She has long legs that make up most of her height. She has fair skin with a birthmark on her right leg. She has large and expressive dark green eyes and long and thick black hair that curls at the ends and these ends are tipped green. She has several scars on her wrists and neck from suicide attempts from her Schizophrenia unmedicated,these are hidden by her jacket.

Arden's main outfit is a blue skirt, it is a dark blue(Empoleons main colour) and it ends at her mid thigh,it does not conform to her frame. It actually puffs outward as she wears a petticoat underneath,the petticoat protects her from wind and provides her body heat to collect and warm her in the winter months. Both the skirt and Petticoat are in good condition a bit dirty from being out. She also wears a navy blue jacket (murkrows plumage).

This jacket also provides warmth to her being made of cotton and fleece. This jacket has Piplup hued pockets,one on the inside,two in the front and one on the right sleeve of the jacket and holds small items and the sleeves on her jacket have stains of dirt and other stuff.

Underneath this jacket is a Snivy green Long sleeved shirt,It's a bit big on her the sleeves covering up to her first set of knuckles. The sleeves are stained slightly with some kind of condiment it's ketchup but it's been dried up and hard to tell. She wears white leggings these a stained a little around the knees with dirt and grass stains. She wears shiny Eevee coloured running shoes,they are worn out from constant rushing out and about.

She wears a charm bracelet with Pokemon on it,the ones with gems are ones she's caught,and plain sliver cutlets are one she wants to raise. This charm bracelet has been scratched a bit but in great shape.

She wears a necklace given to her from her grandmother and it's a 16k gold heart locket,and it means a lot to her as she was the one to drop the "depression" diagnosis and say it might be Schizophrenia,also it being that her grandma is no longer with her this locket is in remarkable condition despite being 40 years old. She often wears a red bow in her hair. The bow is in mint condition and keeps the hair out of her face. She has a Solosis coloured back-pack with holds her books,Meds, Pokeballs and other items.

Personality: This girl is a handful, Lively and Energetic this gal never skips a beat. She loves people and wishes to find life-long friendships,but secretly wishes to find a mate. Some guy to look past to disorder and scars and help her overcome her disorder.
She has paranoid schizophrenia and is currently medicated,She should never go without her medication,She can be a danger to anyone and herself.

Her scars make her ashamed of her disorder and letting it get that bad,and gets defensive over the scars and disorder,to the point of lying about her scars and claims she was attacked by an Ursaring when she was young.
She is very brave and will always defend a friend no matter what. She is honest and tactful she's not known to sugarcoat issues. She loves music and often humming a melody.

She also likes playing with her Pokemon and making them treats,she makes a mean poffin batch. She also likes romance and often dreams of finding someone to take her for who she is. She often is self-critical and beats herself up for her failings and short comings. She's often second-guessing her abilities and pokemon training tactics. She's also always seeking approval and is often fearful of judgement on her disorder.

Biography:
Born into a large and rich family being born to a doctor father named William Mauser and Teacher mother Robin Mauser (Maiden: Hertzsprung) and her paternal grandparents Harrison and Carrie Mauser. She would be the first for 5 kids and be the oldest of three girls. Her grandparents often taking care of the children as her parents worked to bring home bread and butter on the table. She developed normally,and took to her baby brother well.

She was a good student and daughter until the age of 13,when she began to develop schizophrenia,Hearing things and getting depressed, She kept this a secret until she attempted suicide by blood-loss as her voices commanded her too,while being monitored she woke up and displayed the symptoms of schizophrenia, Showing delusions,Disorganized thoughts, speech and behavior and flattening of emotions. Her doctors knew exactly what was going on and told the parents. Her parents were denying it heartily but her grandmother allowed the doctors to move Arden to the psyche ward and allow her to be medicated.

It would be a couple months until she was released with a medication regime,she did fight the doctors and nurses and gained more scars from smaller attempts on her life as the depression medications ramped up her suicidal thoughts and the voices played on her weak mind. When she came home she was given two Pokemon Murkrow and Piplup. Murkrow from her mom and Piplup from her dad and they served a purpose to ease Arden back into life. She took to the reentry well but had a couple slip-ups and medication troubles but at 15 she was finally finalized to leave the hospital's care and be a patient in a smaller health center,which went smoothly.

At 16 she left the care of her parents after being stable for a good while and decided to start in Furoh and finish in Sinnoh. So she boarded a train to take her there while receiving a Snivy from her grandfather and the locket from her grandmother. She train a bit after landing in the first grassy patch but soon decided to train as she goes. She's willing to win and make friendships along the way.

Class: Ace Trainer

Starting Pokemon:
Murkrow-Aria-Female-Level 10
Ability: Super Luck
Nature: Sassy
Characteristic: Likes to Sleep
-Peck
- Astonish
- Haze
-Brave Bird (Her father is a staraptor)

Snivy-Baritone-Male-Level 5
Ability: Overgrow
Nature: Naughty
Characteristic: Often Scatters Things
-Tackle
-Leer

Piplup-Rhythm-Female-Level 5
Ability: Defiant
Nature: Bold
Characteristic: Often dozes off
-Pound
- Growl

Items: Soothe Bell (Worn by Aria)
x10 potions
x15 pokeballs
x3 Full heals
Dress shoes
Fancy dress

What is the biscuit's name? The answer is... Scheherazade

Other Notes: She is assumed Heterosexual,but isn't interested in Lovemaking at this time
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Toogee
post Jun 20 2014, 09:12 PM
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You have a lot of detail here. This seems to be an interesting character. However, you should work on structure and grammar. The appearance and personality are giant lists; we prefer paragraphs here. There are a few run-on sentences that could be broken up. Check out some of the accepted profiles for examples.


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SacredHeart
post Jun 20 2014, 10:58 PM
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QUOTE(Toogee @ Jun 20 2014, 10:12 PM) *
You have a lot of detail here. This seems to be an interesting character. However, you should work on structure and grammar. The appearance and personality are giant lists; we prefer paragraphs here. There are a few run-on sentences that could be broken up. Check out some of the accepted profiles for examples.

I made them into paragraphs now and edited run-on sentences. Thank you for your kind words,I was really worried about this Character.
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Toogee
post Jun 21 2014, 10:21 AM
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Weak Livered Milk Drinker
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Joined: 19-August 07
From: Sitting in an English garden, waiting for the sun
Member No.: 208

And a Golurk



Cool, but instead of one giant paragraph for each, try breaking it up into 2-3 smaller paragraphs. A giant block of words will strain the eyes of anyone reading your posts. For example, the appearance could be three paragraphs: one for physical features, another for clothing, and the last for additional accessories. A lot of times, you're using commas instead of periods. There is some random capitalization as well. Be sure to read it over to catch those things.

Brave Bird can be used at level 37. Until then, the murkrow can spend time learning the maneuver.


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SacredHeart
post Jun 21 2014, 04:11 PM
Post #5


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Joined: 2-April 14
From: Canada
Member No.: 217 457

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QUOTE(Toogee @ Jun 21 2014, 11:21 AM) *
Cool, but instead of one giant paragraph for each, try breaking it up into 2-3 smaller paragraphs. A giant block of words will strain the eyes of anyone reading your posts. For example, the appearance could be three paragraphs: one for physical features, another for clothing, and the last for additional accessories. A lot of times, you're using commas instead of periods. There is some random capitalization as well. Be sure to read it over to catch those things.

Brave Bird can be used at level 37. Until then, the murkrow can spend time learning the maneuver.

I think it's finally in order!
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Toogee
post Jun 21 2014, 04:30 PM
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Member No.: 208

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Approved. Go post in the Current Levels thread. Have fun!



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