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Posted by: Kief Jan 28 2009, 05:46 AM

Post some quotes that are very funny in video games here
Mine is from Grand Theft Auto San Andreas
CJ when busted by a SAPD officer: "I'll tell you what one time, shut your mouth" (He said that to the cop)
LOL Classic!

Posted by: Shirosaki Jan 28 2009, 06:19 AM

Oooo, so much to choose from! Lets see...

Daxter;(To Samos) Uh, we won't find anymore of that Dark-gooey-Eco stuff in there, will we? 'Cuz I'd hate to fall in again and turn into you!

...Classic.

Posted by: Milo Jan 28 2009, 07:57 AM

Soldier "their motto is acta non verba, it means action not words."
Sarge "well, your motto should be verba non acta cause you never shut the hell up, now lets go."
Dunno why this is funny to me, it just is. Its from Battlefield: Bad Company.

Posted by: Julius Caesar Jan 28 2009, 08:07 AM

"Look...would you mind just rejoining the enemy? Please?" --Ike, FE10, after Oliver joins.

Posted by: Letan Jan 28 2009, 10:24 AM

"The Enrichment Center reminds you that the weighted companion cube will never threaten to stab you and, in fact, cannot speak. In the event that the weighted companion cube does speak, the Enrichment Center urges you to disregard its advice." - GLaDOS, Portal.

"It's all clear you can come out now. This is sergeant errr Smitherson..ton" - Grunts (IWHBYD Skull when hiding behind cover), Halo 3.

"I should have been a GEAR!" - Marines (IWHBYD Skull if under heavy fire, this is a Gears of War reference), Halo 3.

"Hey sexy, no, not you, the alien" - Marines (IWHBYD Skull if looking at pilot marine with the Arbiter near), Halo 3.

Posted by: Shirosaki Jan 28 2009, 11:44 AM

Here's another! This time from Sly 2: Band Of Thieves.

Dimitri: My suit is GREASY SWEET!
Sly: I have no idea your saying... and your suit sucks.
Dimitri: Let's dance!

Posted by: Pokii Jan 29 2009, 09:29 PM

"I like penguins!" - Berserker Darkling (The Darkness)

Posted by: Stealth Rock Jan 30 2009, 09:41 AM

A woman in the Pokemon center, I think Sandgem or Oreburgh.
"There, you can have all kinds of fun with your friends!"

Posted by: The Serenity Spirit Jan 30 2009, 01:34 PM

Random Shorts Boy in FR/LG:

"Hi! I like shorts!"

Classic.

Posted by: Milo Jan 30 2009, 01:40 PM

"Persecutor of Pumpkins" - Jester in Overlord.

Posted by: Shirosaki Jan 30 2009, 04:42 PM

"Anyone who makes Orihime cry gets the snot beat out of 'em!" ~Tatsuki Arisawa.

"This fight has only just begun but it's already over."

"If I say I'm bored... is that being rude?" ~Sosuke Aizen.

"I kill the enemy. That is all" ~Soi Fon.

"You're slow... even when you're falling..."

"One move now... will shorten your life." ~Byakuya Kuchiki.

"Ichigo Kurosaki! The one who's gonna beat your a**!" ~Ichigo Kurosaki.

All taken from Bleach: The Blade Of Faith.

Posted by: Kief Jan 31 2009, 07:08 AM

This topic is also open to funny signs you see in video games

Mine:

Trespassers will be shot! Survivors will be shot again! - Various signs infront of restricted areas in Grand Theft Auto San Andreas and Grand Theft Auto Vice City

The best and funniest warning sign for me.

Posted by: Swordsalmon Feb 1 2009, 06:28 PM

Everything from Binks' Emblem. *Shameless advertising*

Aaron: Bodybuild! Woah, that was wierd...
Samson: That is from our gods. They bless our temple with manly and brotherly love!

-Langrisser 2

Posted by: knil1 Feb 1 2009, 07:23 PM

I was on a website that noted funny quotes from video games.

One of the quotes was "congraturations!" It was form the gouls and goblins game at the end.

I also thought it strange that nurse joys always wanted to "see you again soon"...

Posted by: johnrichard1991 Feb 2 2009, 08:54 AM

Rasputin: "Do not try to resist me, or I will have to hug you to death."

Is that funny??

Posted by: Jaima Feb 2 2009, 04:34 PM

Joshua: Follow My Lead!

Neku: Screw that!

(Joshua and Neku, 'The World Ends With You')

Posted by: psystar Feb 3 2009, 01:00 AM

I'd do this

QUOTE(Jaima @ Feb 2 2009, 01:34 PM)

Posted by: Shirosaki Feb 3 2009, 02:22 PM

"Fire's bad for the complexion. I burn easily, never tan!" ~Nero from Devil May Cry 4.

Posted by: Shoutai Feb 3 2009, 09:58 PM

hmm... lemme see...


"My name is Cloud. And I don't care about your names. As soon as I get my money I'm outta here" - Cloud FFVII
or something like that... But I just love that scene..=D

Posted by: Charlemagne Feb 3 2009, 11:30 PM

"Dear Sarge,
Kicking ass in outer space, wish you were here!"
"I heard that, jackass!"

Halo 2, level Delta Halo, UNSC Marine to Johnson

Posted by: Shiraoi Feb 4 2009, 06:48 AM

QUOTE(psystar @ Feb 3 2009, 01:00 AM)

Posted by: Tiamat Feb 8 2009, 02:58 AM

If Joshua/Neku fangirls piss you off, stay away from the FE slashgirls. We're all nuts if you interfer with our fangirl tendencies. ...*cough* Moving on...

Geneforge 4: Rebellion

"The Geneforge process is... agonizing." He thinks for a moment. "Wait. Agonizing. Is that the right word?"

"Yes, agonizing is exactly the right word."

A guy you meet early on. I don't remember the exact quote, but that's close to it.

It's funnier in-game, really! It needs context and I can't remember the context well enough to provide it. ...That and it's like ten paragraphs of typing from memory. Geneforge has damn good writing, but it can get very quickly.

Or maybe the quotes just funny because I has a twisted sense of humor.

Posted by: Shiraoi Feb 8 2009, 09:13 AM

Well, it's not that I have problems with the JoshxNeku ship itself, there are two things that disturb me: JoshxNeku fluff and when fangirls state it's canon (one of the biggest pet peeves of mine) These two have a really interesting relationship, but I don't think of it as a romantic relationship. Good writers could pull a decent pairing story, but it's not a fluff material, in my opinion. That said, I ship it really hard in Another Day and in the manga XD; I just noticed that JoshxNeku in AD and the manga is really similiar to ItsukixKyon from Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya in the way it works.

But you know what I ship REALLY hard? NekuxMick. And this would even go with the topic. Mick thinks the BEST THINGS EVER when you are maxing out his friendship gauge, especially if you don't buy anything


Welcome to the shadows. Oh, hello...Thanks forcoming back.
(He sure comes here a lot...)

Well, you're all dressed up! (Wait, who dressesup just to go out for ramen?)

Thank you,come again. (Wait, don't tell me he comes in because...I'm here?)

Thank you. (Does he come here just to see me?)

H-hello? (He's back AGAIN!)

(What if hecomes by because he's into me?...Th-this isn't in the manual!)

Th-thank you? (More!? I'm onto you.)

Y-you sure look nice today...again.(Is he really dressing up just for me!?)

Th-th-thank you! (Aaack! He IS just coming in to see me! Wh-what do I DO?)
I always aim to p-p-please, sir. See you...soon, I'm sure.

And the faces he makes are priceless. I wish I had a screenshot

Posted by: Celestial Blade Mar 8 2009, 10:03 AM

Digimon World Data Squad/Digimon Savers: Another Mission
*encounters Leviamon*
Masaru/Marcus: Hey, Agumon! He looks like a big alligator or something. Why don't you try talking to him?
Agumon: Nah... He just looks like he wants to eat us!

Posted by: Ulquiorra Schiffer Mar 18 2009, 01:02 PM

"I bought a new parasol. But I don't want it to get rained on, so I watch the TV weather reports." ~Pokemon Diamond.

Posted by: TheAcePlayer Mar 18 2009, 05:48 PM

Professor Oak: So, are you a boy or a girl? (Pokemon R/B/Y and FR/LG)

Professor Oak: This is my grandson. He's been your rival ever since you were babies. Now, what was his name again? *writes something*. Oh, that's right! I remember now! His name was DOUCHE! (Pokemon R/B/Y and FR/LG, idea comes from vgcats)

Here are some of the comics from vgcats' Super Effective:
http://vgcats.com/super/?strip_id=0

Posted by: Schala Mar 19 2009, 02:43 AM

Plenty of great stuff from The World Ends With You, including pretty much anything Sho says (though that might just be because I'm in Calc...), and almost everything from Another Day.
Some have already been said, but a few of my favorites that haven't been are:

Posted by: pichu Mar 19 2009, 04:15 PM

Cid Highwind as the Tiny Bronco is crashing into the ocean.

"Hold on to your drawers and don't piss in 'em"

Posted by: Ulquiorra Schiffer Mar 19 2009, 05:27 PM

I'm about to put you outta commission! Yoruichi Shihon from Bleach: Shattered Blade.

Posted by: Blak99Psy Mar 20 2009, 10:04 AM

WOW! Who woulda thought the toxic chemicals would leak out the back of the factory endangering countless lives? ...I DID! ~Dallas, from Ratchet: Deadlocked


Sly - Wow, Murray. Great job. You really handled those rowing oars with finesse back there.

Murray - The Murray is, and always has been, FINESSE!! ~Sly and Murray, from Sly 3



Murray - Can do, pal. Can do, with a VENGEANCE! ~Murray, from Sly 3

Posted by: johnrichard1991 Mar 20 2009, 09:59 PM

Namu...

Posted by: Christopher Wallken Mar 20 2009, 10:45 PM

YOU SPOONY BARD! - Tellah FF2

Lloyd: "Man, cant we just quick jump there?"
Raine: "What's a 'Quick Jump'?"
Lloyd: "Nevermind..."

The "For Lazy People" Scene found inside the Tower of Mana in Tales of Symphonia when going to fight Luna.

Posted by: Ulquiorra Schiffer Mar 21 2009, 03:19 PM

Yoruichi Shihion(Drunk):"It's way too hot in here! I, Yoruichi Shihon, shall now remove my clothes!"
Ichigo Kurosaki(Suprised):"Wha?! Wait, Yoruichi, you're drunk!"
Kukaku Shiba(Cheering):"All right! Go for it!"
Ichigo Kurosaki:"Kukaku, just how much did you give her to drink?!"
Kukaku Shiba:"Not much... just a sip."
Ichigo Kurosaki:"No way! Look at her!"
Kukaku Shiba:"She can't hold her liquor. Just a sip will make her drunk."
Ichigo Kurosaki(Shocked):"You knew that and you let her drink?!"
Yoruichi Shihon:"Let's start with the pants!"
Ichigo Kurosaki:"No, DON'T! Stop! Didn't I tell you to stop?!"
Yoruichi Shihon:(Transforms into a cat)"Meow..."

~From Bleach: Dark Souls.

Posted by: kidjolt Mar 29 2009, 08:24 AM

'...' is the funniest quote b/c you never kno what is means

Posted by: shadow31 Apr 3 2009, 10:53 AM

"TO MY LAB!"-Mao, Disgaea 3:Absence of justice.
It's funny because of the way he says it. He sounds like invader zim.

Posted by: Noodlechan Apr 3 2009, 11:54 AM

"...Oh my god..." ~Jak, Jak and Daxter 3 and X

The quotes not that funny its just the way he says it always makes me giggle xD

and of course

"Must-resist-emo-urges" ~Neku, The World Ends With You, brilliant xD

Posted by: Aruchama Apr 5 2009, 12:29 AM

Baltheir:"Ah, the prison repository of wrested relics and raiments"
Vaan:"So our things are in here?"
Baltheir:"That's what I said."

Vaan: "Fran!"
Fran: "Yes?"
Vaan: "I was wondering--about what Jote said, you know? About how you said the same thing 50 years ago?"
Fran: "Your point?"
Vaan: ".....How old were you again?"
All: "..........."
Baltheir: "Nice, Vaan."

~FFXII

Marta: “Oh Emil, I was so scared!”
Emil: “You were more scary…..”
Marta: “What was that?”
Emil: “N-Nothing.”

Genis: “Notice anything different about me?”
Raine: “Hmm? Well…”
Genis: “Hello? I got taller! And my voice has gotten deeper!”
Raine: “Oh really? How much have you grown?”
Genis: “A sixteenth of an inch!”
Raine: “…”

(Rough. only half remember the lines)
~Tales of Symphonia: Dawn of the New World

Posted by: MissinNo Apr 5 2009, 01:34 AM

You can't catch anything with out a pokeball! You know, P O K accent E B A L L! And I am the cheese, from a dude in MUGEN, still a game.

Posted by: Trynyti Apr 5 2009, 09:08 PM

QUOTE(psystar @ Feb 2 2009, 11:00 PM)

Posted by: illogique Apr 6 2009, 06:15 AM

Just every conversation you have with Elika in Prince of Persia. Some are serious but most are injected with humour.

"You don't look so good."
"Is that what you tell all the girls? No wonder you ended up alone in the desert with a donkey."

Posted by: Tangy Apr 6 2009, 06:43 PM

I love the paper mario ones... xD. Especially TTYD.

Kammy Koopa: By the way Bowser... do you like fried eggs?
*you are given the option of yes or no* xD.
Bowser: I LOVE fried eggs! LOVE 'em! (I forget what no is. xP)

*Mario's phone vibrates*
Goombella: What's wrong Mario? You need a bathroom?

Pennington: -looks at Mario- That mustashe... that nose... Ho ho ho! All too easy! You, sir, are quite OBVIOUSLY the famed LUIGI!
Mario: o_O; -shakes head-

Chef Shimi: You shaved my life!

And the one in my sig is also from paper mario TTYD. xD. Anyone know who?

And one from pokemon I always thought was weird.

Nurse Joy: We hope to see you again!

That's not very nice. ._.; Who the heck would say that to you as you come out of a hospital?

Posted by: TMG Apr 6 2009, 06:57 PM

QUOTE(Tangy @ Apr 6 2009, 07:43 PM)

Posted by: flarp22 Apr 6 2009, 07:05 PM

"I object! That was...objectionable!"

That never gets old for me, AND I HAVE NO IDEA WHY.

Posted by: Christopher Wallken Apr 6 2009, 09:07 PM

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JoODv8LVib8&feature=PlayList&p=4277483B27FAE3BD&playnext=1&playnext_from=PL&index=7

Posted by: auron779 Apr 9 2009, 08:15 PM

Most of Dante's scenes from Devil May Cry 4 are hilarious, like the one where the Savior has just been powered up after Nero is absorbed into it, which is this huge, magnificent floating stone angel in the sky with these marvelous wings, which is supposed to really bring destruction to everything... And you know what Dante says? "Hey check it out, its got wings.", in a remotely impressed manner, its hard to explain, just watch the clip below and you'll get me. It's a great way to cut the tension after the last few powerful scenes in the game, one being in the clip provided below.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rxj4_h1ZxOc&feature=PlayList&p=A0B8E2094CB63BAF&index=15

Or the one before he fights that giant frog boss with those two fairies, just the way he acts. XD
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kb76eVRZwPM&feature=PlayList&p=A0B8E2094CB63BAF&playnext=1&playnext_from=PL&index=18

Or this one, after he beats the fiery boss and gets his final weapon (Not including Yamato anyway) its just CLASSIC.
"First I whip it out! Then I thrust it! With, great, force! Every angle..! It penetrates! Until... With great strength! I... Ram it in! In the end... We are all satisfied... And you are set free..." XD
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oPEyjlfLnj4&feature=PlayList&p=A0B8E2094CB63BAF&index=19

No wait, I lie, THIS one is classic.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K6CQje8Yz6s&feature=PlayList&p=A0B8E2094CB63BAF&index=20

Infact, if you don't have this game, I suggest you go out and buy it, its pure gold, especially if you're after a hack and slash, fantasy like game, with bad-ass characters, a great story-line and gameplay, or at least rent it, its epic and shouldn't be missed.

Posted by: Saira Apr 9 2009, 10:48 PM

ALL YOUR BASE ARE BELONG TO US.

Posted by: Luckybug76 Apr 10 2009, 09:13 AM

"I'd rather we just skip the formalities." - Luxord, Kingdom Hearts II.
Heh, I'm a Luxord fan!

Posted by: drVox Apr 12 2009, 11:54 AM

the best thing I can think of off the top of my head is from the second Phoenix Wright game:

"the oay sucks, the clown sucks, and my partner has his hand up my pants."

out of context, it becomes ten times more hilarious. (the character "speaking" is a ventriloquist's dummy.)

Posted by: MissPodoodle Apr 12 2009, 02:48 PM

I love the funny Metal Gear Solid Quotes! XD

Naked Snake: I'm glad I'm not as strange as the Major.
Para-Medic: The majors not strange...
Major Zero: [in background] My tea's gone! Who's drunk it? How am I supposed to have teatime without tea?
Para-Medic: Well, not that strange...
Major Zero: [in background] My scone's gone too!

Para-Medic: [On the radio] Snake, have you seen "007: From Russia with Love"?
Naked Snake: I don't like those movie. Real spies are nothing like James Bond. It's pure fantasy.
Para-Medic: Snake, I don't think the Major's going to like you saying that.
Naked Snake: And even though it's fiction. I can't help but comparing myself to Bond.
Major Zero: What exactly don't you like about James Bond? Is it the fantastic gadgets? The cars? The guns?
Naked Snake: Major...!
Major Zero: Snake, wouldn't you like to have a gun shaped like a pen?
Naked Snake: What good is a pen going to do me in the jungle? I'd look like a fool.
Major Zero: Then what about a snake-shaped gun? You could make it look like you're grappling with a giant snake and then get a shot in on the enemy while they're distracted.
Naked Snake: Ok, now you're being ridiculous.

Posted by: Ulquiorra Schiffer Apr 12 2009, 03:00 PM

"So we're up against the world's nastiest crime boss with the best mercenary racers money buy... and we've been poisoned. I've had better weeks..." Jak from Jak X: Combat Racing.

Daxter;;"You have a good day."
Erol;;"I never do."

From Daxter.

"Kill Metal Heads? Get toys? Sounds good to me." Jak from Jak II: Renegade .

Posted by: Suschan Apr 12 2009, 03:36 PM

Staying on the Jak & Daxter lines because the game is too funny to me.

Sig: You know, my momma used to read me bedtime stories about Mar when she'd tuck me in. She'd give me a nice glass of warm yakow milk... and my little Poopsy bear.
Daxter: Bedtime stories? Warm milk? Poopsy bear? Buddy, ya just blew yer image!

Jak II Renegade

And to end it with some Viewtiful Joe

Joe: ...that voice! It really is Captain Blue! Wow! Hey, can I have your Autograph?
Captain Blue: ...no.

Hulk Davidson: Davidson is in the House! Hulk Davidson is born to be wild!
(I can't take him seriosly while singing that)

Posted by: Zoe Apr 12 2009, 06:19 PM

KH
"HAAAAAY SORA! GET UP ON THE HYDRA'S BACK!!!111"

FFXII
"If Migelo finds out we've been down here, he'll tan our hides "

Posted by: 885ertd Apr 12 2009, 06:22 PM

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D-gj4hnv_5w(click)

Posted by: Shadow the Hedgehog 0B Apr 26 2009, 11:01 AM

Best. Quotes. Ever.:

WARNING:

Idle Dialogue, Sonic Adventure DX:

Station Square: Sewer-
-"This makes me feel like a rat!"~Sonic the Hedgehog

Casinopolis: Act 2-(Sewers)
-"What's this smell?! Smells like trash!"~Sonic the Hedgehog (Side note, the way he said it is what floored me)

Cutscene Dialogue:
SONIC: Come on ya big drip! Where ya going?

SONIC: Look! It's a giant talking egg.

SONIC: Knuckles, don't tell me Eggman tricked you again?
KNUCKLES: Me? What about you?
SONIC: Way to go, Knuckle-head!

SONIC: Knuckles, did you let Eggman trick you again?
KNUCKLES: Like you weren't?
SONIC: Smooth move, Knuckle-head!

SONIC: Don't you realise when you're been tricked?
KNUCKLES: Tricked? No one makes a fool out of me!
SONIC: Way to go, Knuckle-head!


(big one, also the last one)

* - The top of the pyramid slides off, revealing a shuttle. The split second
before it launches, Sonic runs inside it.

COMPUTER (male): Green light for launch. Primary engine ignition on. Beginning
liftoff countdown. Ten. Nine. Eight. Seven. Six. Five. Four.
Three. Two. One. Shuttle liftoff.

* - It fires off, and gets into orbit after a few moments. Drawing closer to
the ARK in a small field of meteors, everyone starts talking.

SONIC: So this is the space-colony where Eggman is hiding...

* - The shuttle rams into an asteroid, and the cargo bay's doors open, letting
the Master Emerald shards fly out.

SONIC: What the?!

TAILS: Is everyone alright? We should be landing soon.

KNUCKLES: Oh, no! The hatch door is open.

SONIC: Don't sweat it Knuckles, the only thing in the cargo bay are those
Master Emeralds,--

KNUCKLES: --Whaddaya mean "don't sweat it"?--

SONIC: --right?--

KNUCKLES: --Land this shuttle and let me out!--

SONIC: --Now get off the control panel. We're gonna crash if ya keep that up!
OH NO! DON'T TOUCH THAT LEVER!!

SONIC, AMY, TAILS: AHHH!!

SONIC: What's up with that Knucklehead anyway, tryin' to take over the shuttle!
I thought we were toast for sure! Huh? Where did he go now?


I've played many more games, but if I posted my favorites from all the games, I'd have been typing this for hours. Plus, I couldn't find any other game script faqs

Posted by: Birostris Apr 28 2009, 11:27 PM

This is just before the first boss of Henry Hatsworth and the Puzzling Adventure, Lady D.

Lady D: You've come at last! And here I thought I'd been stood up once more.

Hatsworth: What the Dickens is this? Dear lady, what are you doing out here?

Lady D: Why, getting married of course, dear Henry. You're a little old for a groom, but I guess beggars can't be choosers.

Hatsworth: Pish posh! I don't have time for such nonsense. Please stand aside, madam!

Lady D: Rejected? Me? You beastly man...

Hatsworth: There, there, madam, I do hope I-

Lady D: NO ONE REJECTS ME! -Blehehehehe*coughhack*heh!

-Battle ensues-
~~~
Oh, and I'm going to agree with the earlier mention of pretty much anything said in Paper Mario games. Especially Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door. That game is rather funny.

Posted by: Phazzy Apr 29 2009, 02:59 AM

QUOTE(flarp22 @ Apr 6 2009, 07:05 PM)

Posted by: Zack Sergfed Apr 29 2009, 03:45 AM

Seeing how someone already say DMC 4 i'll start with DMC3,lol.

Cerberus:Leave now mortal!The likes of you are forbidden in this land!You who are powerless and not worthy to step foot here!
Dante:Wow i've never seen a talking mutt before.You know in a dog show,You'd definitely take first place.
Cerberus:You a mere human make a mockery of me?!
Dante:Easy fido.How about i take you out for a walk,Come on puppy,lets go.
Cerberus:You'll regret this you worm!
Dante:It's showtime......Come on!


Vergil:You showed up.
Dante:You sure know how to throw a party.No food,No drinks.And the only babe just left.
Vergil:My sincerest apology brother.I was so eager to see you,I couldn't concentrate on preparations for the bash.
Dante:What ever,At any rate it's been a whole year since we last met.How bout a kiss from you little brother?Or better yet how bout a kiss from THIS!...So this is what they call a heartwarming family reunion,eh?
Vergil;You got that right.

this whole scene's funny too.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8FiZH7wD2QI

Posted by: CrystalSteelix Apr 30 2009, 10:31 PM

"Someone had too much chili at Wendy's." — Gex

Posted by: dokuro May 1 2009, 10:27 PM

http://img216.imageshack.us/img216/5116/aerof21.jpg

Posted by: Mudkipz May 2 2009, 12:53 AM

In Diamond/Pearl/Platinum
It was something like "Just two buff guys standing side by side. What's so strange about that?" (Too tired to remember that)

Failing that, any quote by GlaDOS, or a couple one liners in Team Fortress 2

edit: Forgot these from Mario RPG
I forgot my bazooka at home, sheesh give me a break here
Some people use something called a DOOR to get in and out of their houses

Posted by: Wolf Princess of the Moon May 2 2009, 07:23 PM

Posted by: Tangy May 3 2009, 09:56 AM

I started my gold version over the other day and found the most amazing quote from talking to a girl outside before you get your first pokemon:

Wow, you POKeGEAR is impressive!
Did your mom get it for you?

xDD.

Posted by: inferknight May 13 2009, 08:42 PM

hey i have sense! I'm sensitive even! you, dragonfable

Posted by: damo279 May 14 2009, 03:47 AM

Nathan Drake "Ahh Crap". Every 5 seconds, its even in the new games trailer. But you gotta love him

Posted by: Dys Tuvai May 14 2009, 04:38 AM

Lessee... Trying to stay away from the Mother series...

"Son of a submariner!" ~ Kefka, FF6

"AHEM. There is SAND on my BOOTS." ~ Kefka, FF6

"You sound like chapters from a self-help booklet!" ~ Kefka, FF6

"Do you think a minor thing like the end of the world could do me in?" ~ Duncan, FF6

"Don't tease the octopus, kids!" ~ Ultros, FF6.

(And speaking of FF6, the ENTIRE SCENE where Gau meets Cyan and calls him Mr. Thou. XD)

"SHUT UP AND DRINK YOUR GODDAMN TEA!" ~ Cid, FF7.

"Wait a minute! When I grow up, I'm STILL trying to take over the world? LAME!" ~ Baby Bowser, Mario and Luigi: Partners in Time.

"Did someone paint 'Taxi' on my 99?" Jaxon, Fire Fight, when asked to pick up ANOTHER informant.

"By the way... I tried poisoning, strangulation, drowning... I even listened to improvised jazz music once, but that only made me WISH I was dead..." Windle Poons, in the end of Discworld II: Missing Presumed ?! (AKA Mortality Bytes!)

"LO! Behold the majesty of the tall stone pointy things! Who knows their mystic secrets? Who cares? Not me anyhow." Rincewind, commenting on the Pyramids, Discworld 2.

"How strange! It's raining machines!" Raja, Phantasy Star 4, after the shuttle carrying the main group crashes on his temple-house.

"An droid, the droid, whatever." Raja, Phantasy Star 4, after Wren says he's not a mechanical doll but an Android.

"Shields up, weapons online... Not equipped with shields? Well, then buckle up." Terran Battlecruiser Captain, Starcraft

"In case of a water landing, you may be used as a floation device." Terran Dropship Pilot, Starcraft

"If it weren't for these damned neural implants, you'd be a smoking crater by now." Terran Marine, Starcraft

"I'm about to drop the hammer and dispense some indiscriminate justice!" Terran Arclite Siege-Tank, Starcraft.

"What IS your major malfunction?!" Terran Arclite Siege-Tank, Starcraft.

"Who set all these lab monkeys free?" Terran Explorer-Class Science Vessel, Starcraft

"Do any of you fools know how to shut off this infernal contraption?" Terran Explorer-Class Science Vessel, Starcraft

"Checklist protocol... initiated. Running level 1 diagnostic. U.S.D.A. selected. F.D.I.C. approved. Checklist completed.. S.O.B." Terran Goliath, Starcraft

"This is very interesting... but stupid." The Valkyrie Pilot, StarCraft: Brood War

<Actually, let's skip most of the 'annoyed' quotes from StarCraft, as most of those pwn)

"Even if I go to hell, I will be here until the end of the world. And if the world does not come to an end, I will destroy it with my bare hands!" Lacan, XenoGears

"The nuclear missile is fire! Down with it before timelimit!" Operation: Wolf (Yay for Engrish! ^^)

"Yeah. For you 'Irony' is 'sort of like iron', isn't it?" Rincewind, Discworld II.

"I never got the whole P.C. thing. It's not 'Tyrocks', it's 'Tyren'. Don't say 'Chicks', say 'Birds'. Don't say 'Birds', say 'Women'. I dunno. It's all a bit too complex for a simple man-of-the-air like myself." Crow the talking Bird, The Longest Journey.

And lastly, not in game but game related:

"Computer games don't affect kids; I mean if Pac-Man affected us as kids, we'd all be running around in darkened rooms, munching magic pills and listening to repetitive electronic music." Kristian Wilson, Nintendo Inc., 1989

Posted by: Rukario May 14 2009, 11:09 AM

QUOTE(damo279 @ May 14 2009, 09:47 AM)

Posted by: Flail May 15 2009, 01:57 AM

"I've sent my right hand to dispose of you!"
"Your right hand comes off?"

~Salazar & Leon Kennedy; Resident Evil 4

Posted by: Karasz May 15 2009, 08:45 PM

Don't know if it's funny or not.

"HA! HA! HA! I'm the king. HA! HA! HA!" ~ King Hippo from Punch-Out!

Posted by: Pokelatinum Jun 3 2009, 03:05 AM

Some very funny Phoenix Wright/Apollo Justice lines:

-"Oh really, Ms Orly?" - Apollo Justice
-(Focus Justice! Time to take advantage of her! ... I mean, of her mistake!) -Apollo Justice
-"...we are compelled to call Ms.Orly a "big fat liar." -Apollo Justice
-"And thank you for telling us that a noodle stand sells noodles. Very enlightening." -Judge
-"OBJECTION! That was... objectionable!" - Edgeworth

Posted by: K a i t l y n RAWR Jun 3 2009, 02:05 PM

Probably, the funniest quotes in Portal come from GLADOS.

For example, she says this while talking to "you" in the game.

"[Referring to the morality core] "Maybe you should marry that thing since you love it so much. Do you want to marry it? Well I won't let you! How does that feel?"

I love GLADOS.

Posted by: Lino Ludocx Kaito Jun 3 2009, 02:09 PM

Oh my god did he just eat my hair??- zack fair - crisis core

Posted by: Maugan Jun 5 2009, 01:41 AM

Warcraft 3:

Priest: I have been chosen by the big metal hand in the sky!

Sorceress: For the End of the World spell, press control, alt, delete.

Dryad: I'll attract the enemy with my Human call: "I'm so wasted! I'm so wasted!

Rifleman: I shot the sheriff, and the deputy, AND YER WEE DOGGIE, TOO!

Bandit: And this one time, at bandit camp...

Necromancer: I love the dead... frequently

Priest: Side effects may include: dry mouth, nausea, vomiting, water retention, painful rectal itch, hallucination, dementia, psychosis, coma, death, and halitosis. Magic is not for everyone. Consult your doctor before use

Posted by: Xdogking Jun 5 2009, 07:49 AM

Random Rocket Grunt in FR/LG- Little Kids shouldn't mess around with Grown-Ups, it makes Bad news!

(And now you know what goes through my head... )

Posted by: Zelkova Jun 6 2009, 08:21 PM

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nFtZkcklPa8&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=54mOPGhQ7Mc&feature=related (NPC don't talk, only make sounds...So you have to read this one.)

And the best one EVER...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QWbcGTgTlS4&feature=related

Only need to watch the first part on the last two...The rest is just credits

Posted by: AT Jet Jun 6 2009, 09:00 PM

The entire fight scene with Daxter and Pecker from Jak III, including the simple way that king rusty-face ends it.

Posted by: Usagi Zakura Jun 7 2009, 04:20 PM

Nippon Ichi-games has a lot of quote-worthy material.
But there's one character from NIS' Disgaea 3, who managed to climb the latter and become one of my favorites despite only appearing in one or two scenes and this is all he says:

Shyrone (Dead serious): "on the unlucky night of Friday of April 13. In the dead of night...did you steal my lunch money? I finally found you! My mortal enemy! How'bout you return my lunch money now?"
Almaz: "Lunch money? Who are you?"
Shyrone: "I am Diez Gentleman Shyrone the transfer! In search of my lunch money I transfer aimlessly and blame anyone! "
Sapphire: "That's pretty unfair. But at least you're aware that you're making random accusations."

Other characters gets some funny ones too. Like the introductions in the trailer:
Mao: "As of today you've joined the demons! You're my slave." (Said in-game to the poor "Unlucky hero" Almaz.)

Almaz: "I will even die for the princess! Though I'd prefer to live" (this is said in-game after said princess forbids him to die...)

Beryl: "Raspberyl's my name. But please call me Beryl. I'm a freshman at Evil Academy just like you. I'm also your childhood friend, we've been rivals from day one... I'm the heroine of this game. "
Of course you'd think Mao would know all this.... but as Beryl's friend notes afterwards:
Asuka: "You're awfully kind to costumers who are playing this for the first time."
Fourth wall? What fourth wall?

Posted by: kelley28 Jun 8 2009, 03:24 AM

All from HM: MFoMT (Harvest Moon: More Friends of Mineral Town). You play as a girl in this version. Guess the translators weren't paying attention. I still find them funny.

May talks to her mom on the phone.
May: The new man over at the farm is really nice ... and handsome, too!
~Actually, I'm the girl over at the farm, but May is 7, and misses her mom, so I'll forgive her

Meet Doug, the owner of the Inn.
Doug: So, you're the new lad who took over the farm?
~Noooo. I'm the new girl who took over the farm.

Give Jeff, the grocer a present.
Jeff: Thanks! You're a swell guy!
~For the last freaking time, I'm a GIRL!!

Posted by: Sora aka Jessy Jun 8 2009, 08:27 PM

Matt - I've been living a lie!
Gabuman - You're not a real blonde?! ~ Digimon

Tk - I dunno! Mama said never take candy or rope from strangers! ~ Digimon (Seriously... Rope? Made me laugh xD)

Izzy - Fascinating! Our bodies are being broken down into little bits of digital information! 8D ~ Digimon (As they're being ATTACKED xD )

And of course, the classic : "Well, excuuuUUUUUUUuuusssee me, Princess!~ - Link

Posted by: Ulquiorra Cifer Jun 9 2009, 10:34 AM

New quotes, yes?

"I'll drive. Jak, you get on the gun! Daxter, just get in, sit down and shut up!" ~ Sig, Jak 3.

"...DRRYY!... You know what's da trouble with you Krew? You got no vision... This place could be a real swingin' joint... Hop Heg Hiven with more dancin', more mac'n, more WOMEN!..."

"I love you man..." ~ Daxter (Drunk), Jak II. Highly hilarious. xD

Posted by: TeeTop Jun 9 2009, 12:19 PM

Something from the Paper Mario series. They like sticking humor in the games' dialogue.

Posted by: tereghan Jun 11 2009, 12:25 AM

QUOTE(psystar @ Feb 2 2009, 11:00 PM)

I'd do this

QUOTE(Jaima @ Feb 2 2009, 01:34 PM)

Joshua: Follow My Lead!

Neku: Screw that!

(Joshua and Neku, 'The World Ends With You')

But it was already taken so instead... "Must Resist... Emo Urges..." Another Neku, The World Ends With You

Also, "You Spoony Bard!" Tellah, Final Fantasy IV

Posted by: PsychicTypeFanatic Jun 11 2009, 12:42 AM

Form Disgaea 2
"Why do WE have to be sacrafices?" "Oh your demons its a year or two off your lifes, you'll spoil them anyway"
"DEAR! This is gonna take more then a few years we'll die" *smacks them back in couldron* "You call THIS good mothering?" *scoffs* "Did you even hear me?! DEVIL WOMAN!"
Paper Mario Thousand Year Door
"So you say your body name and friends have been stolen?" *nods* "Oh sorry that happens...WAIT! No it doesn't!"

Posted by: Rhythme Jun 11 2009, 06:46 AM

Sora: Kairi... Kairi's inside me?

Sora from Kingdom hearts.

Posted by: 0Sandshrewer Jun 11 2009, 01:26 PM

"Have you seen my little Failure?"
"I'm going to dart in ten seconds. Ten, nine...Who has time for counting?"
Both from Pokemon Platinum, don't ask why my rival's name is Failure.

Posted by: Metal4good Jun 11 2009, 11:03 PM

...D-Do I really inspire this sort of frothing desire from the female masses? - Miles Edgeworth from Phoenix Wright Trials and Tribulations.

Posted by: Beto Atiro Jun 11 2009, 11:24 PM

I have two. Here's the first one.

"Floor tastes funny." Odd, Short, but Crazy, and Funny.

Here's my other one from Spore. It was something like this.

"We would have prepared, but all of (planet's name) came down with hysterical pregnancies the other day."

Posted by: Thornstar Jun 12 2009, 10:06 PM

I'm shocked no one has mentioned this yet :B

Posted by: LT8 Jun 12 2009, 10:20 PM

Conglaturation !!!

You have completed a great game.
And prooved the justice of our culture.
Now go and rest our heroes !

Said at the end of the old Ghostbusters video game.

Posted by: Quebec Jun 12 2009, 10:42 PM

Whomever quoted The World Ends with You - ILU. That game has some of the funniest quotes I've come across. xD

"Sine! Cosine! Taaaangent!" - Minamimoto Sho, while fighting you in a boss battle

And then, there's Portal. Oh, Portal.

"Spectacular. You appear to understand how a portal affects forward momentum, or to be more precise, how it does not. Momentum, a function of mass and velocity, is conserved between portals. In layman's terms, speedy thing goes in, speedy thing comes out. Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee..."

"Didn't we have some fun though? Remember when the platform was sliding into the fire pit and I was like, "Goodbye" and you were like "NOOO WAAAY" and I was all "we pretended we were going to murder you" That was great..."

"Speaking of curiosity, you're curious about what happens after you die, right? Guess what? I know! You're going to find out first-hand before I can finish telling you, though, so I won't bother. I'll give you a hint: you're going to want to pack as much living as you possibly can into the next couple of minutes."

All by GLaDOS, from Portal.

And Tales of Vesperia:

Judith: We're done.
Raven: I wanna fly too!
Rita: So fly!...Stalagmite!
Raven: [screams]

Posted by: tinymon Jun 12 2009, 11:42 PM

Tales of Vesperia
Estelle: Um... Judith? I think that outfit looks very cute on you.
Judith: Oh, thanks, Estelle!
Estelle: But... um... When you're wearing that outfit...
Rita: She's trying to say that we're fed up with the guys ogling you in that outfit!
Estelle: Um, that's not exactly it. You see, we, umm, have a very important job to do so, umm...
Judith: So you're jealous?
Estelle: Ah...!
Judith: If that's all it is, just wear this outfit yourself.
Estelle: Like my boobs could fill out that top! Uh...! *runs away embarrassed*
Judith: I never said anything about boobs...

Karol: Yuri's croquettes are the best!
Rita: How strange... They're just balls of mashed potatoes, but...
Judith: There must be a secret ingredient!
Raven: Oh yeah? What'd ya put in it, Yuri?
Yuri: Love.
Rita: Ugh! *hack hack* Ick! Bleh!
Karol: o_o;; Wh-who are you and what did you do with Yuri...?
Raven: My hearing ain't what it used to be. What did ya say the secret ingredient was?
Yuri: *sincere* Love! The lady who ran the inn where I lived said cooking was all about love. *smirks* I put as much love in them as I could. So eat them with care, okay?
Karol: Yuri's love-filled croquettes....
Rita: Ugh...
Raven: I wish they weren't so good...
Judith: A secret ingredient is a cook's greatest treasure. You didn't want to tell them, did you?
Yuri: Actually, I didn't put anything special in there at all.

Fire Emblem Path of Radiance
*points* Filled with awesome quotes. This whole support conversation is sheer gold.

Kieran: Hey, Rhys! Nice day, isn't it.
Rhys: Oh, hello Kier... Yaaaa! What happened to you!?
Kieran: Huh? What is it?
Rhys: Th-there's blood gushing down the side of your head!
Kieran: Hm? Why, so there is... Isn't that odd?

Rhys: Who were you sparring with? And why did they hit you hard enough to
draw blood?
Kieran: Sparring? Ha! No one spars with Kieran! I'm too much man for them!
No, I was just swinging my axe around.
Rhys: H-how do you cut yourself swinging--
Kieran: Rhys? I'm a Crimean knight! We fear neither blood, nor pain, nor
terribly sharp implements being inserted into our...
Rhys: Ooooooohhh...
Kieran: ...Eh? What's wrong, Rhys?


Rhys: May I watch you train? I figured someone with a heal staff should be
around, just in case an accident happens.
Kieran: Ha ha ha! Aren't you a worrywart! But being watched is good! Now I can
take my training to the next level! All right! Watch this!
Rhys: Oh, er... I'm just here to see that you don't get hurt... Oh, do be
careful... No! Don't juggle the lance, too!
Kieran: Behold the awesome power of Crimean Royal Knight Fifth Platoon Captain
Kieran! Now I call this little trick-- Nnngg...! Gaaaaa! Whaaaaaaaa! ...Ah,
nuts.
Rhys: Oh, dear heavens! Oh, this is terrible. Stay right there! Let me take
care of you...
Kieran: Ho, I'm fine! Don't worry about old Kieran! I just need to pull this
axe out of my head here... Whooo, that's sharp!


Rhys: Please, Kieran! Stop! You have to think about your own safety!
Kieran: Safety? Ha ha ha! I'm not a coward! Crimean knights fear nothing!
Never! Why, not even the threat of merciless--
Rhys: I know! I know, but... If something happens to you, it will ruin your
reputation.
Kieran: My reputation?
Rhys: Your gravestone is going to say: "Here lies Kieran the knight! He
suffered a massive hemorrhage in training and died cold and alone." Are you
all right with that?
Kieran: Hmm... Y-yes, that could be bad... Why, no one would ever remember the
time that I fought the Mad Crocodile of Upper--
Rhys: Please! Promise me that you won't do any more dangerous training.
Kieran: Wha--?! Oh, that's a hard pill to swallow! But if I die in training
before hitting the battlefield, it would be a shame... Oh, what to do...
Rhys: We'd be in trouble if we lose you, Kieran! Er... Oh! Yes! You see, we
can't achieve victory without our greatest soldier--that would be you--in our
army!
Kieran: I see. Yes, you're right! You're absolutely right! Our army's finest
warrior cannot afford to push it too far! Very well. I'm not sure how this
will work, but I will take better care of myself! From now on... simple
training!
Rhys: Phew... Thanks for your understanding. I'll come check on you from time
to time. Remember! Take it easy!
Kieran: Sure, no problem! Hmmm... I guess I'll just... sit down here and...
knit... something... Ooo, look! A bear!
Rhys: No, Kieran! Noooooooo!

Posted by: Purple no baka Jun 12 2009, 11:58 PM

Mario and Luigi Superstar saga: "I am me." - little cute red guy on a random island.

Posted by: Quebec Jun 13 2009, 12:29 AM

QUOTE(tinymon @ Jun 13 2009, 12:42 AM)

Posted by: Poketoad Jun 13 2009, 02:13 AM

Some Pokemon hacked game
just started at the beginning-
Prof Oak: WTF did you wake me up for.
After when you chose your gender-
"Are you a Gay, Lez, or Tri"
LOL.....classic

Posted by: Usagi Zakura Jun 13 2009, 04:09 AM

Some kid in a Pikachu-suit: "I want to be more like a Pikachu. Maybe I should get the day-care to raise me".
Platinum.

I'd like to see that.
"Would you like us to raise your strange kid in a Pikachu-suit?"

Posted by: Joe SD Jun 13 2009, 09:12 PM

PUNISH HIM!!!!!!-Lord Crump, Paper Mario the Thousand Year Door.
Umm...Ouch?-Random X-Naut, Paper Mario the Thousand Year Door.
"You out there infront of the TV" Did this guy go nuts or what?-Baby Yoshi, Paper Mario the Thousand Year Door.

Posted by: inferknight Jun 15 2009, 01:33 PM

"Hey! You unveiled Vayle!I have to admit, I saw this one coming." you dragonfable. That game is funny!

Posted by: FlameChocobo Jun 15 2009, 08:14 PM

This is the part where Tellah fights Edward (Gilbert) in Final Fantasy IV for the DS.

Tellah: *Attacks Edward* You spoony bard!
Edward: Please, things are not as you believe!
Tellah: *Ignores and still attacks* I see quite well how they are!
Edward: I beg you, hear my words!
Tellah: *Attacks Edward again* Choke on your words!
Edward: Please, I emplore you!
Tellah: *Keeps attacking Edward* Know this pain-Anna's pain!
Edward: But Anna and I-
Anna: *Cuts Edward off* Edward, Father... Please, stop this.

Just wow. Tellah blames the chaos on Edward and attacks him.

Posted by: Libros Jun 18 2009, 12:11 AM

"I will hunt you AND the night!"

Ah the Belmonts. This quote if from Leon in particular,( from Castlevania: Lament of Innocence).

Posted by: ReyTakashi Jun 18 2009, 03:08 PM

"Please dont tell me you ACTUALLY have a favorite ten digit number..." - Lin from Advance Wars: Days of Ruin

Posted by: Poopsy Jun 20 2009, 11:10 PM

"It's time to kick ass and chew bubble gum, and I'm all out of gum..." - Duke Nukem

Posted by: Nove Jul 1 2009, 10:02 AM

Kotake: Hey, Koume, what is that above your head?
Koume: I don't know, but you have one over your head too, Kotake!
Kotake: But I'm only 400 years old!
Koume: And I'm just 380 years old!
Kotake: We're twins! Don't try to lie about your age!
Koume: You must have gone senile!
Kotake: Who are you calling senile? Is that how you treat your older sister?
Koume: We are twins! How can you be older?
--Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time

"I like shorts! They're comfy and easy to wear!"
--Random kid in Pokemon R/B

Refia: What's up with Arc? Why is he so determined to help this prince?
Luneth: It's probably because someone who's even shorter than him is trying to do the best for his country.
--Final Fantasy III

Desch: Yes! We finally have a ship! Now we can go to exotic ports, and meet even more exotic women!
--Final Fantasy III

Posted by: Warden Notes Jul 1 2009, 10:08 AM

"All your base are belong to us." - Zero Wing

Posted by: Rukario Jul 3 2009, 06:13 AM

This was a triumph.
I'm making a note here: HUGE SUCCESS.
It's hard to overstate my satisfaction.
Aperture Science
We do what we must
because we can.
For the good of all of us.
Except the ones who are dead.
But there's no sense crying over every mistake.
You just keep on trying till you run out of cake.
And the Science gets done.
And you make a neat gun.
For the people who are still alive.
I'm not even angry.
I'm being so sincere right now.
Even though you broke my heart.
And killed me.
And tore me to pieces.
And threw every piece into a fire.
As they burned it hurt because I was so happy for you!
Now these points of data make a beautiful line.
And we're out of beta.
We're releasing on time.
So I'm GLaD I got burned.
Think of all the things we learned
for the people who are still alive.
Go ahead and leave me.
I think I prefer to stay inside.
Maybe you'll find someone else to help you.
Maybe Black Mesa
THAT WAS A JOKE.
HA-HA, FAT CHANCE.
Anyway, this cake is great.
It's so delicious and moist.
Look at me still talking
when there's Science to do.
When I look out there, it makes me GLaD I'm not you.
I've experiments to run.
There is research to be done.
On the people who are still alive.
And believe me I am still alive.
I'm doing Science and I'm still alive.
I feel FANTASTIC and I'm still alive.
While you're dying I'll be still alive.
And when you're dead I will be still alive.
Still alive~
Still alive...~

Just that whole thing. It's hilarious. xD

Posted by: Ren815 Jul 3 2009, 08:08 AM

"Behind that cute little face you do some pretty awful things." Kingdom hearts chain of memories.

Posted by: Jun Jul 8 2009, 02:55 PM

Im sure it was said in a post earlyer..

"Your small time Saddler" - Leon from Biohazard 4

Posted by: Praseo Jul 11 2009, 09:27 AM

Grand Theft Auto, San Andreas: When Smoke is ordering the fast food towards the beginning of the game, he orders like, half the menu.
I find it funny.

Posted by: BloodWolf Jul 12 2009, 11:51 AM

"If there are any old folks listening, go back to your homes! Florida does not want you! Please, die somewhere else!" Vice City Online. Radio. I laugh everytime I hear this xD

Posted by: Sarean Jul 13 2009, 08:34 PM

Krew: While smuggling the huge statue through the sewers, 'ey, a grueling rainstorm flooded the whole place. The statue and five of my best men were swept away.
Jak: That's terrible.
Krew: Yes, a tragic loss. I've missed that statue ever since.

Oh lawl.

Posted by: MarinaMarth Jul 15 2009, 04:40 PM

The Phoenix Wright series is loaded with thoses! XD

PW1, First Case
Larry: We were Romeo and Juliet! Mark Antony and Cleopatra!
Phoenix: (Ummm... didn't they ALL die?)

PW1, Second Case... I believe.^^;
Nick: (I will get to this woman's bottom, wait... you know what I mean)

I don't know when exactly for thoses, but they are pretty epic! =D
Phoenix: (...Well excuuuuuuse me, Princess.) (LoZ reference FTW!)

Maya: I need a waterfall for my spiritual training
Phoenix: So why don't you use the shower?
Maya: I'll try... no, the pressure is too low...
Phoenix: So why don't you ask the local fire corpse if they can spray you with their fire hose?
Maya: Great idea! I'll call!
Phoenix: (Apparently, the E.S.P is no aid in detecting sarcasm.)

Mischief Makers was also real memorable (surprised much? ) The Beastector were just so random!

Lunar: Hya hya hya hya! I've been expecting you! ...achoo!!
Marina: Do you know what time it is? Well... Wrong! It's Boss Time!
Lunar: Yeah! It's Boss time! Achoo! I'm the stongest guy in the universe! The Great Lunar! Achoo! Gee, it's getting cold out here! But that's OK, 'cause this will be a quick fight!
Marina: Yep! I totally agree!! ...sniffle...sniffle...

Posted by: Rie Moor Jul 19 2009, 10:26 AM

"I AM ERROR!"
-Random guy in Link's Awakeing (I think)

"You! Get out of my castle!"
-Beast to Xalden (They're already outside the castle)

"You spoony bard"
-FFIV

"All your base are belong to us."

Posted by: trogdor1 Jul 22 2009, 12:11 PM

Fawful for the win!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=64EyBPyy_hM

Posted by: Fluruzz Jul 22 2009, 12:18 PM

"now for the important question.... have any cigarette? "
"I.. have a chew gum"

- Luis Sera and Leon, RE4

"you look cute without glasses, Hunningan"
"do i have to remind you that you still on service?"
"psh... story of my life.."

Leon and Hunningan, RE4



XD I just LOL'd so hard

Posted by: Subatomic Jul 22 2009, 08:13 PM

FFVII:

Aris: You were so cute in that sailor suit! Right, Cloud?
Cloud: (Right.) You looked like a bear wearing a marshmallow.

Red XIII: Could we kindly hurry along? This hot weather is drying my nose up!
Yuffie: Mine, too!

Pokemon Platinum:

(Rival's Name Here): Hey, is this your sister? (referring to Cynthia) No? Ah, whatever.

Spyro the Dragon:

Elder Dragon(After freeing him): Now that you have freed all the dragons, take this fancy... vortex-y... thing-a-ma-jigger! It'll take you back to the Artisan home. But first, let me tell you a story!

Spyro: N-no thanks. See ya!

EDIT!!!!:
Spyro2: Ripto's Rage!:

Elora: (After Spyro exits the Glimmer portal) Oh, hello. We never got the chance to introduce ourselves before. My name is Elora.

Spyro: Uh, hi, I'm Spyro. ... What are you, some kind of goat?

Elora: I'm a faun, you dork!

Spyro: Oh! ... Sorry.

Posted by: Wonderbread Jul 22 2009, 10:04 PM

Mother 3:
Ok, so some enemy soldiers are patrolling the bottom of the ocean, and in order to get oxygen, they have to use an oxygen machine, and the oxygen machinelooks like a merman, and he gives them oxygen by giving them a huuuuge kiss on the lips and filling their lungs with air.
Navy SQUEAL 1: These oxygen machines are kind of degrading, don't you think?
Navy SQUEAL 2: I don't know, I sort of like them.
Navy SQUEAL 1: *backs away slowly*

Posted by: ReyTakashi Jul 23 2009, 12:18 AM

"It says press any key...Well, which one is the 'any' key?!"
-Starcraft Marine

Probably one of my favorites xD

Posted by: Treiga Jul 26 2009, 02:06 AM

Okami:



Issun-"I knew it would spit Ume out.Thats why i told you not to worry.I mean,just look at him.He looks like one nasty tasting canine!"

Kokari-"... ...Really?"

Issun-"Yeah!Never seen an uglier looking dog in my life!"

Ume-*growl growl*

Issun-"What?!I say something wrong!?Just trying to have a little fun like i do with furball here..."

Ume-"White wolf...How did you come to bear the Canine Tracker?Hm?Theres a familiar smell in the air...My former comrades...it emanates from your body!"

Issun-"What the?!Well its none of your business how we smell!its just that we dont like taking baths,thats all!"

Posted by: Mana Summoner Jul 29 2009, 07:55 AM

Anyone who said anything from a Tales game (Phantasia, Abyss, Symphonia, Symphonoa DotNW and Vesperia) are awesome. XD

To clarify 'anything out of Jade's mouth' here's some of his sarcasm.

Luke: Why do you look so comfortable?
Jade: Oh no, I so hot I could just die.
Guy: Oh brother.. (or was it' Give me a break)

Anise: You're an amazing liar colonel. Your smile hasn't budged.
Jade: (As sarcastic as ever) Oh no, I assure you I'm crying on the inside wracked with guilt.
Guy: Uh huh.

Jade: (in Dr. Mambo title) Leave that monster on the battlefield.
Luke (?): Why?
Jade: (almost evilly) I'm going to dissect it.

Jade: Your Majesty, we don't have time to look for your rappigs.
Peony: But what is my cute little Jade falls down the stairs and breaks his neck?
Jade: Alright, alright. Just stop using that name.

Anise: Maybe it's a fonon bomb! (referring to a sound inside Peony's room)
Peony: Hey, that's not funny! (he's rarely serious)

Peony: Did you say something? (referring to Jade calling Peony's weapons collection a mess)
Jade: Not at all. Incidentally, would it be possible to borrow this sword?
Peony: Hmm...I suppose that if those three cute girls begged a little...
Natalia: That's a fine case of sexual harassment!
Peony: Okay, then you guys do it too. Go ahead, Luke.
Luke: M-Me? ...Please lend us the sword.
Peony: Next.
Guy: With all do respect, we'd like to borrow the sword.
Peony: Next
Anise: (loli cuteness coming through) Emperor Peony, you're so handsome! Can we please borrow the sword? Pretty please with sugar on top?
Peony: Ha. Great, great! Just wait til you're six years older, and I'll date you anytime!
Luke: Whoa...he sure changed fast.
Natalia: (not amused the slightest, irritated) Please lend us the sword.
Peony: Oh, that icy smile...Yeah...
Tear: M-Me too? //// Um...Your Majesty, would you please allow us to borrow the sword?
Peony: Oh, that hint of naivete! Yes!
Jade: Your Majesty--
Peony: Shut up. Don't beg. I'll puke.
Jade: (enjoying himself obviously) Now, now Your Majesty. Please allow me to offer my most sincere request.
Peony: No. Leave.
Jade: How unfortunate. We'll be taking the sword then.
Team, except Jade: ...

Jade and Peony in one scene is always fun. XD

Posted by: Arvi Jul 29 2009, 09:04 AM

I'm not sure is these here already but...

Garrus Vakarian: No salarian hearts, no turian livers, not one krogan testicle.
Commander Shepard: Your kidding right? Why would any one want krogan testicles?
Garrus Vakarian: Some Krogan believe that testicle transplants can increase their virility. Counteract the effects of the Genophage. It doesn't work but that doesn't stop them from buying. They'll pay up to 10,000 credits each. Thats 40,000 for a full set. Somebody's making a killing.

...from Mass Effect.
Garrus, you are my idol. <3


And some Halo 3 IWHBYD -skull quotes.

Elites:
"What? Do you want me to say 'Wort wort wort'?" -When you stare.
"Damn. I like you too, but... damn!" -When you stare.
"Really, I'm not going to kiss you in front of everyone." - When you stare.
"No, I don't know how to kiss you either." - When you stare.

Sergeant Johnson:
"That one called you fat, Chief!"


And the most epic quote from Bioshock:
"...would you kindly..?"

Posted by: Vicente Jul 31 2009, 04:11 AM

"Just be careful."
"I always am."
*Walks into a metal bar*
"OW! I did NOT see that!"

*While Swimming*
"AHH! I'm dry!"



I've got a bad memory, I should remember a lot more...

Posted by: dragonsama Jul 31 2009, 11:36 PM

I'm not sure if this is exact but it was "How about I punch you in the face. Bet that would shut you up." or something along those lines from Hotel Dusk: room 215. I loved it because it seemed sort of random and I so wanted to do it to the person at that moment. Long winded conversations annoy me.

Posted by: Kittyxthexkitsune Aug 7 2009, 03:03 PM

The despcriptions for the items in Disgaea 2 are pretty funny.xD

Father's Fist
I'm not angry,I'm upset.Now get over here.

Lucky Punch *I think*
Baby!I'm Sorry!Why you make me do that?

Those are the ones I remember off the top of my head.xD

Posted by: Marr965 Aug 8 2009, 06:14 PM

From Apollo Justice (fourth in the series):
First case:
Kristoph Gavin: That screeching noise... Is that your voice?
...
Apollo Justice: (First trial: nervous. Meeting him: Cardiac arrest.)
...
Phoenix Wright: So you're...
Apollo: Fine! I'm, uh, fine!
Phoenix: Ah... Mr Fine, is it?
Apollo: Uh.
...
Winston Payne: The defendant took a customer... (new text thingy) ...and he hit him! Wham! On the head! Smack! Killed him cold!
...
Deadly Bottle added to the Court Record.
...
Kristoph: Are you alright? You're sweating bullets...
Apollo: Bullets...!? Where!?
...
Apollo: My brain feels strained and raspy, sir.
...
Apollo: OBJECTION! (Shouting)
Judge: No need to shout, Mr Justice. I can hear you perfectly well.
Apollo: Aha ha ha...
...
Winston: Objection! (Just the way his voice sounds...)
...
Judge: Wait a moment! Where is the witness?!
Winston: I surmise she has been frightened by the defense's demonic-looking horns.
Apollo: (So I used alittle hair gel! Relax, people!)


That's enough for now...

Posted by: Volcanic Queen Aug 8 2009, 09:57 PM

Most of the lines I find amusing come from the Golden Sun series. Here are a few of my favorites:

*searching a wardrobe* It's a silk negligee. Isaac, put that back!

From Lost Age:
Sheba: But Jenna, aren't you and Isaac, you know, an item?
Jenna: No! Not.... really. *blushes*

Also in the same conversation:

Sheba: Don't you mean... Isaac?
Jenna: *blushes* Stupid Sheba...

After you fix the ship in Alhafra (it's been a while since I've seen this one, so the line may be incorrect due to faulty memory. This is just what I remember.):

Kraden: Ahoy, Briggs!
Briggs: Uh-oh. It's Felix!
(There's a gap in my memory here)

Eventually,

Chaucha: So do what you swore to do!
Briggs: *taunts your party*
Chaucha: Is that the best you can come up with?!
Briggs: But Chaucha, they're an awfully tough bunch...
Chaucha: See, it's that attitude right there! That's why you'll never amount to anything!
(another memory gap, but it's something about protecting Alhafra from pirates and politicians)
Kraden: What?
(another memory gap, I think that there's some taunting involved, though.)

Some non-GS lines I like:

(This one was mentioned on a different thread, but I'll repost it here.)
Aah! Ow! I've got ashes in my eyelashes! Get it, ashes and eyelashes? Okay, that was bad, sorry.
-some kid on Route 113 in R/S/E

(I haven't played PH for awhile, but there is a few that I do remember)
Any of the Rupoor messages in Phantom Hourglass (especially with the bowdlerized item get music.)
(Again, don't remember the full line, but it's where Capt. Linebeck insults Ciela by calling her a 'twinkly bit of fluff' or something along those lines.)
Basically, any of Linebeck's dialogue is win.

Hey there, sugar pie!
-one of the Hyrule Town Minish from Zelda: The Minish Cap

Hey, Link, what can I do for yo-
*Ezlo bites his tongue by accident*
Owowowowow! I juth bit my thongue!
Don't make me thpeak! Juth thort it out yourthelf!
-one of Ezlo's lines after beating the Wind Ruins

Yeah, Ezlo is a goldmine of funny dialogue.

Posted by: Eldoraan Aug 8 2009, 11:01 PM

Disgaea 2

Taro: Maybe he did something naughty to her. Sexual Harrassment! Adell's going to jail!
Adell: How do you even know what Sexual Harrassment is?

Posted by: Smashball Aug 9 2009, 06:12 PM

I got some! *Sorry is my spelling's bad...*
*Mario RPG*
Booster: (To Peach who is crying) What's that dear? Are your leeking? ( This is my favorite! )

Mallow: (To Mario) Who do you think you are Bruce Lee?

Booster: Where's my cake?
Booster's Minon (I forgot his name): There's a 70% chance your standing on it!

*Zelda Four Swords Adventure*

Old Man: Can you make this line go faster? I really need to go....WHAT?! This isn't the line to the bathroom?!

Posted by: Shiningheart Aug 9 2009, 06:30 PM

*grin* Some of my favorite lines are from the Prince of Persia games.

Ferrah: I'll meet you in the baths! *leaves*
The Prince: *mimics Ferrah* I'll meet you in the baths! *normal voice* Yes, because I know where THOSE are. I'll just walk right up to a sand creature and ask "Excuse me, would you happen to know where the baths are?" "Oh sure, I used to be a bath attendant back when I was alive!"

Ferrah: "Look, a crack!"
Prince: "Wait, let's see where this hallway leads." *traps appear in hallway* "Alright, you can take the crack."

*when the two are in darkness*
Ferrah: "My grandmother used to tell me whenever I was afraid to use the magic word, and a door would open."
Prince: "Yes, yes... And what, out of curiosity, was the magic word?"
Ferrah: "Kakolukia."
Prince: "Kakolukia?" *door opens* You did that, didn't you?

Posted by: ForeverSearching Aug 12 2009, 03:05 PM

All that come to my mind are either Portal or Phoenix Wright related xD.
"What the hell was that wriggling piece of plywood!?" and "You should come with a supply of vintage cheese for your whine." Both by Edgey~
"Here, let me put you on. ~Hellooo~. See!? That's how dumb you sound!" -GLaDOS
I forget the rest of the quotes I liked. ._."

Posted by: dragonsama Aug 12 2009, 05:46 PM

QUOTE(ForeverSearching @ Aug 12 2009, 04:05 PM)

Posted by: Kbman Aug 12 2009, 07:42 PM

Just about any of the Scout's domination quotes. My personal favorites...
Engineer-"Hey, here's something you shoulda built; a not dyin' machine!"
Pyro- "Repeat after me, 'muh muh muh I'm dead.' "
Heavy- "Those $200 bullets ain't so hot when they don't hit nothin'" (Triple negative FTW)
Sniper- "Yeah, that fancy scope of yours? I bet you got a really good view of me killin' you."

That, and another from Megaman Starforce 3.
Acid Ace R and Dread Joker R - We're pretty awesome.

Posted by: zyoude Aug 13 2009, 02:11 AM

"Looks like WE need to work TOGETHER!" LOL Sonic said that to Shadow in Sonic the Hedgehog for Xbox 360. REALLY could you get anymore kindergarten?

Posted by: Jackyll Aug 13 2009, 09:22 AM

Those who say there's nothing like a nice cup of tea for calming the nerves never had real tea. It's like a syringe of adrenaline straight to the heart! -Cheshire Cat, American McGee's Alice.



Scene between a merchant and Altaïr from Assassin's Creed XD

"Altaïr, my friend! Welcome, welcome! Whose life do you come to collect today?"


"His name is Abu Nakkud"


"Ohh~ The Merchant King of Dammas; the richest man in the city! Quite exciting, quite dangerous. I envy you, Altaïr! ..Well, not the bit where you were beaten and stripped of your rank but I envy everything else. Oh! Except for the terrible things the other assassins say about you, but yes, aside from the failure and the hatred, yes, aside from those things, I envy you very much!"


"....If you're finished..."

XD

Posted by: Sorakh28 Aug 16 2009, 01:00 PM

Some of the quotes I cracked up in Pokémon Ranger 2...

"Aw, but these Bidoof are so cute!" Keith, when the two of you go off for 1-Day Internship- you have to help the Milkman from Bidoof, and... *cracks up* Keith says this.

"TARGET CLEAR!" Barlow about to use his muscles to do a Target Clear. Who needs Pokémon?

"There's no way I can do what Barlow does!" During the Darkrai Wi-Fi Mission. Poor Keith. XD

Posted by: Dark Chidori Aug 16 2009, 01:12 PM

"This gym is great! It's full of women! Heh heh heh...." Pokemon Red, Blue, Yellow, and Green.

Posted by: bulbachu Aug 19 2009, 08:49 AM

grand theft auto:vice city
cop: make me run and i'll get all sweaty

pokemon diamond/pearl/platinum:
cynthia: you still love the enthusiasm kids bring to your work, don't you rowan?

Posted by: PikaGirl Aug 19 2009, 07:36 PM

Well, All I could think of are the death messages from the King's Quest series, as well as this.

"And why the hell not."-Trilby (after he finds the teddy bear), 5 Days a Stranger.

Posted by: Swordsalmon Aug 19 2009, 09:57 PM

"SPARE the pleasantries!" -Vulkoras Desolator, Sins of a Solar Empire

...Heck, just about everything the Vulkoras says, along with many other units could count.

Posted by: TochiroBahamut Aug 20 2009, 01:38 AM

"SNNAAAAAAAKE!" Major Zero, Metal Gear Solid 3.

"It hurts, it hurts, go b a c k.....; I feel h a p p y.......;it hurts.....I'm so sad.....;I feel g o o d...." Giygas, Mother 2/Earthbound.



<Tochiro>

Posted by: Crow Aug 20 2009, 10:19 AM

"Dont worry. He may be a failure as a human being, but he´s an excellent doctor."
Whatever the nurse´s name was, from Suikoden tierkreis.

Some quotes nagged from the credit song "still alive", portal.

"..We do what we must because we can.
For the good of all of us, except the ones who are dead.
But there´s no sense crying over every mistake,
you just keep on going till you run out of cake.
And the science gets done, and you make a neat gun,
for the people who are still alive"


"Im not even angry. Im feeling so sincere right now.
Even though you broke my heart and killed me.
And tore me to pieces.
And threw every piece into a fire.
And as they burned it hurt because i was so happy for you ~~"

..That is so priceless.

Posted by: G1z Aug 20 2009, 11:20 PM

QUOTE(Letan @ Jan 28 2009, 05:24 PM)

Posted by: xxX mEw lOvEr Xxx Aug 21 2009, 03:50 PM

Tink: *Flirts with flower monster that looks like a girl*

Flower: I'm very flattered, but I'm a guy.

Tink: Your confusing damnit! I hate other living organisisms with dingalings!

From Disgaea 2 Cursed Memories

Vyers: *talks about how great he is for a while*

Laharl: I've never heard of you. It's just a coincedance we're here. Your just a tiny stepping stone on my path to the throne

Vyers: *gasp* How dare you! I'm am Dark Adonis Vy-

Laharl: Who cares who you are? Your new name is Mid-Boss

From Disgaea Hour of Darkness

Posted by: G1z Aug 21 2009, 07:43 PM

Alone in the Dark: "I don’t have your stone! And f*** you anyway!"

I love intelligent dialogues in video games

Posted by: Scrooge Aug 23 2009, 01:38 AM

From Silent Hill 2:

"You're not friends with that red pyramid thing, are you?"

Ohohohoho, James, you kidder.

(The above quote is equally amazing, also. Bow before it.)

Posted by: Furrtwo Aug 23 2009, 01:42 AM

I'd put something from Lego Star Wars II, the funniest game ever, but they don't talk in it. Yet that alone is what makes it hilarious.

Example? The "I am your father" scene. Classic. Simply classic.

Posted by: dragngrl1122 Aug 23 2009, 10:40 PM

Heh. Not a quote from a game but it is from Final Fantasy VII Advent Children:

Reno: Mother shmuther, its Jenova's friggen head
Yazoo: Hey! I will not let you refer to mother that way
Rude: Our apologies
Reno: Yeah your moms cool... What the hell am i saying!


lol makes me laugh everytime!

Posted by: G1z Aug 25 2009, 10:44 AM

QUOTE(dragngrl1122 @ Aug 24 2009, 05:40 AM)

Posted by: Blahsadfeguie Aug 25 2009, 04:18 PM

Dr. Eggman from Shadow the Hedgehog: YOU KNOW WHAT THEY SAY, THE MORE THE MERRIER.

Oh, wait, this is Funniest quote, not Most Annoying.

Posted by: Count Bleck Aug 25 2009, 04:32 PM

Final stage of non dragonamulet users in dragonfable.

sekduatXV"You don't get it do you?"*Throws away mask*I am sekduat the ist
you "WOW YOU'RE OLD! IMEAN REALLY REALLY OLD!"

Posted by: BioShockingly Aug 25 2009, 07:26 PM

"And from that day forward, any time a bunch of animals are standing together in one place, it's called a ZOO! UNLESS IT'S A FARM!" -Soldier, Team Fortress 2

Okay, so it was in the "Meet the Soldier" video, not the actual game. Still funny as hell.

"HE PUNCHED OUT ALL MY BLOOD!" -Scout, also TF2 (Meet The Sandvich)

Posted by: Blahsadfeguie Aug 25 2009, 09:07 PM

Morshu: Lamp Oil, Rope, BOMBS? You want it? It's yours my friend! As long as you have enough Rupees.
*And then...*
Morshu: Sorry Link, I can't give credit! Come back when you're a little..... MMMMMMMMMMMM! Richer!

Link: Faces of Evil is still a video game.

And the TF2 trailers are awesomesauce.

Heavy: WHO TOUCHED MAH GUN?!?

Posted by: Captain Keso Aug 30 2009, 04:17 PM

The Cake is a Lie.

Posted by: Politoed Master Aug 30 2009, 10:21 PM

Grunt (from halo series, to master cheif): "Hey Demon, the jerk store called, they said they're all outta you!"

Posted by: Hoolo Aug 31 2009, 07:14 AM

ALL YOUR BASE ARE BELONG TO US!
Sooooooo classic nowadays.

And from the Chrono Trigger sequel not from Square Enix, Crimson Echoes. Convinced it was 98% finished?

Magus: Death means nothing to the reaper!

And later Dalton says:


Dalton: We're on Chapter Five, right?
Lasher: Yes, sir!
Dalton: Okay! Get ready to write: And then it came to pass that venerable Dalton - yes, he who subjugated the Golems - located the Silver Streak of Zeal, and taking it upon his mantle, declared the new kingdom an immortal one, with Dalton as eternal regent over...
Hm?
Dalton: Prophet!
Magus: These games are over.
Lasher: Hiyaaaah!
*Magus kills random Lasher*
Dalton: Hey!! Those guys are getting hard to find these days!

XD

Posted by: NekoSas Jan 6 2010, 10:42 AM

"sleep. and then I'm done with that, roll over and sleep some more" - Axel, Kingdom Hearts 358/2 days.
that line was so unexpected, it had me giggling for ages xD

Posted by: Hinata Hyuuga Jan 6 2010, 10:55 AM

Halo 3 has some of the best quotes ever

"If I chase him, and then I catch him and than I don't know what to do!"
"When has US looking for IT EVER been a good idea?"
"You know, at this point, if the demons catch us, and rip off our little skulls, and takes off our backpacks, and humps us with his big, demony butt..... we deserve it!"
"I can't run when I'm scared"
"No one sleeps tonight but me!"
"You drive! I'll shoot stuff!"
"This is a biblical kind of doom"
"Windbagging, sucking , air monkey!"

Posted by: Cura Jan 6 2010, 10:41 PM

"No way! He just ate my hair!"
-Zack Fair

Posted by: Kingdom Xathers Jan 7 2010, 08:53 AM

"Um... 'To write the countless thongs of...' DAMMIT!"

Random Reaper from "The World Ends With You", during Beat's Week

Posted by: KutKu Rider Jan 11 2010, 12:31 PM

Army of Two: "Don't piss on my cupcakes" -Salem

That's my absolute favorite line ever.

Posted by: Jack Frost Jan 11 2010, 01:48 PM

QUOTE(Shirosaki @ Jan 28 2009, 01:19 PM)

Daxter;(To Samos) Uh, we won't find anymore of that Dark-gooey-Eco stuff in there, will we? 'Cuz I'd hate to fall in again and turn into you!

...Classic.

Posted by: palkiabulba Jan 19 2010, 05:04 PM

Ok, this one wasn't actually spoken, but it was written:

"Any tree can drop apples. I'll drop the freaking moon!"

(i love this one)

Sho Minamimoto from The World Ends With You

Posted by: Snarf32 Jan 19 2010, 05:10 PM

Nurse Joy
Here are your pokemon, hope to see you again!

I did that because it is like she wants your pokemon to get hurt

Posted by: hotrodman28 Jan 19 2010, 05:29 PM

Funny grunt "I'll polish your shoes!" Halo 3 last level

Posted by: Canya Jan 19 2010, 06:31 PM

"Y'know what they say, 'All toasters toast toast!'"

- Mario, Hotel Mario

Silly CD-i Mario, toasters toast bread! XD

Posted by: Prof Draco Jan 20 2010, 11:24 PM

"Ever wondered why your pill bug won't roll up until you find out it's a slater? No? Very well, I'm mad."
Blathers upon donating a pill bug to the museum an AC:WW
I just found it funny for some reason.

Posted by: Sweet Negative Mar 2 2010, 11:34 AM

"Got it Memorized?" - Axel from Kingdom Hearts

Posted by: Unskilled78 Mar 2 2010, 12:22 PM

in Bioshock 1, one of the craziest men (a former playwright, named Sander Cohen) sends a bunch of low-level mooks to kill you while http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c5Gd_qUd9hs plays in the background.

Posted by: Mars Adept Enten May 21 2010, 10:22 PM

If Let's Plays count, I have some other lines I love:
"Hey, it's the apples! They dropped in for a party! A monster party, with baseball bats and talking flowers that are like, 'Hey, baby!'" (UltraJMan's Let's Play of I Wanna Be The Guy, video 6)
"BIRD F***** BIRD!" (Same video)
"Would the spike that's killing me please report to the front desk?" (same video)
"So we're all gonna be guys here. Alright? Alright." (same video)
"Yeah, I got an idea: let's lag!" (same video)
"There's a spike there, there's a spike there, you must jump over it. *lands in spike pit* You must land on the spikes." (same video)
"Let's get killed by the same f****** spikes over and over again!" (same video)
"The Guy is like a fragile piece of--tomato! He explod! Every time you die!" (same LP, video 5)
"Gotta stop doin' that. Ya gotta become the guy. Gotta get yo' game on, sonny!" (same video)
"Per- *dies* not -amundo" (same LP, video 4)
"I wonder if it's possible *dies* to die *dies again* to the hand. That comes out of the tree hole." (same video)
"Funny, I thought the moon fell on us in the last video. How come there's another one in the sky, and how come it went from a quarter moon to a half moon, eh?" (same video)
"These spikes? Oh, yeah, they're totally treasures!" (same video)
"I LIKE GRAVY! I LIKE FINGERNAIL POLISH!" (Same Let's Play, video 7)
"Maybe it's about as funny as going to Texas to fish for vampires!" (same video)

LPs are a rich goldmine of funny quotes.

Posted by: Fel Vadam May 22 2010, 02:35 AM

The Arbiter: "We must go. The brutes have our scent."
Sgt. Johnson: "Then they must love the smell of bad ass. And I left a little present for you, Arbiter. And I'm walking away. Ha-ha-ha!"

Halo 3, with the IWHBYD skull on.

Posted by: Maddie107 May 23 2010, 04:39 PM

i agree

Posted by: SkyBlueFox May 23 2010, 05:21 PM

"I hope that... odor isn't coming from you."
"Hey, step off, buddy."

Half-Life... 1, I think. I heard it in a mod of HL1, so I'm only going on assumption here.

Posted by: Frost Assassin May 25 2010, 08:56 PM

"You Bastardo!!!!" Random Soldier on AC2

"Oooooohhhh it couldnt take it, its been knocked out!" Annocuner on Pokemon Battle Revolution. This funny because when I heard this I said "Thats what she said." and me and 2 friends burst out laughing until we couldnt breath.

Cant think of any more at the moment.

Posted by: Royolis May 26 2010, 05:52 PM

Posted by: Pimpburger Jun 4 2010, 07:41 PM

Mother 3
I'm sorry Mike, but that's called sexual harassment these days.

Posted by: Time Guardian Jun 5 2010, 04:53 PM

"I will Kill you AND THE NIGHT!" - Leon Belmont (Castlevania: Lament of Innocence)
(...As Adam Sessler commented before, he is going to kill an entire time of day...)

"Find the Computer room!" - Vector (Shadow the Hedgehog)
(It does get a bit annoying in that level of ShTH, but his Voice just makes the quote sound funny to me)


"Only 2 pieces? I believe the correct phrase is YOU FAIL!" - Miles Edgeworth (Ace Attorney Investigations)
(Classic moment in AAI)

"You have been doomed ever since you lost the ability to love" - Alucard (Symphony of the Night)
(Funny because of how cheesy it is, along iwth most of SotN's dialouge)

(And just to end the post, one of the more narny opening sequences ever, which by far makes it the best as well)
--Richter: Die Monster, you don't belong in this world.
--Dracula: It was not by my hand that I am once again given flesh. I was called here by... humans... who wish to pay me tribute.
--Richter: Tribute? You steal men's souls, and make them your slaves!
--Dracula: Perhaps the same can be said of all religion.
--Richter: Your words are as empty as your soul. Mankind ill needs a savior such as you...
--Dracula: What is a man? A miserable little pile of secrets! But enough talk, have at you!

Posted by: Avec Plaisir Jun 5 2010, 06:09 PM

From Lux-Pain. (:

Ai: Go out and do something! Take Atsuki here with you!
Ryo: But--
Ai: And I don't mean just sitting on a bench on Rainbow Hill!
Ryo: ... Fine I'll go exert myself. /crosses arms/

And then they leave the bookstore (Atsuki and Ryo, both males) and "take a walk".
It was highly amusing to a yaoi fangirl.

Posted by: shuzumi Jun 7 2010, 05:31 PM

Shadow Hearts: Covenant

"Bacon Jet Go!"
"Bacon Jet?"

"Manhood?"

Posted by: BlacKOuT Jun 7 2010, 09:19 PM

Not sure if these have been said but they should have...

"Sorry, but our princess is in another castle!" - Toad, Super Mario Bros.
That right there can drive a man crazy.

"Do a barrel roll!" - Peppy, Star Fox 64
This must of been said. :P

"It's time to kick ass and chew bubble gum, and I'm all out of gum." - Duke Nukem, Duke Nukem 3D

Posted by: Gairyuki Fury Jun 8 2010, 05:22 AM

Halo grunts are priceless XD
"Leader is dead, FLEEEE!!!"
"Run.... away...."
"Follow the light brothers, of my BRIGHT. BLUE. BALLS."
"I get his helmet."
"He killed flip yap.
No, that was flap yip.
It was flip yap, I went to nipple academy with him"
I only seem to be able to remember halo ones (sorry if they've been said before <.< >.>)

Posted by: Darkrow Jun 8 2010, 12:40 PM

I find most of the dialogue in Soul Calibur: Broken Destiny's The Gauntlet mode amusing.

For example: "High Divorce Rates... Anime... Hipsters... Panty shots... I am busy searching the future. Leave now." is said by Zasalamel before fighting him.

Also, anything Dampierre says can be funny.

Posted by: Bravado Jun 8 2010, 04:10 PM

I would definitely have to say, "Before you die, I'm going to tell you a little secret. Just to make it so that you really don't want to die." from Countdown Vampires would top my list, right next to Michigan: Report From Hell's "That explains it! That smell wasn't a toilet, it was a dead body!"

Posted by: Mars Adept Enten Jun 23 2010, 10:33 AM

I'm replaying Final Fantasy I & II: Dawn of Souls, and came across this gem of a line:

"Well, the princess was captured. And of course this is all your fault too! You? Blow up the Dreadnought? You couldn't blow your way out of a cloth sack." -old pessimistic guy in the rebel hideout throne room.

It's just something about the way he compares your party's lack of effectiveness to trying to blow up the Dreadnought with Sunfire to blowing their way out of a cloth sack that makes me .

Posted by: megapoke Jun 27 2010, 08:29 PM

In sonic and the secret rings, during the last boss fight
"your going to lose"

Thanks for the message of hope there...

Posted by: KotoneMarill Jun 28 2010, 02:06 AM

You think you have done some damage? Two plus two is... ten. IN BASE FOUR. I'M FINE. ~GLaDOS (Portal 1)

Posted by: megapoke Jul 8 2010, 09:20 PM

It should be cooler inside.
Ummm...doesn't quite look like it.
Sonic andd the secret rings
Personly, I prefer the air
Hands off my prey
SSBB
We, We're going to fall!
I know, isn't it great!
Sonic and the black knight

Posted by: tomkear Jul 10 2010, 07:19 AM

Just Cause 2- Scorpio-president If you dont shut up im going to cut of both your hands and bitchslap you with them both

Posted by: Duder Jul 10 2010, 07:58 AM

shadow the hedgehog: guys a chaos emerald? this is easier than taking candy from a baby, which is fine by me.

Posted by: Phantom Wolf Jul 10 2010, 09:54 AM

Judith: "I feel like I can fly!" Raven: "I wanna fly too!" Rita: "So fly! STAGLAGMITE!!!!!!" Raven "AAAAAARG! *CRASH!*

Posted by: iRyu Jul 10 2010, 10:26 AM

Kingdom Hearts 358/2 days

I was sad at this cutscene because of Xion. But this part made me laugh.

Roxas: "No! Xion... who else will I have ice cream with?"

and then this part after that

Riku: "Why!? Why do you have the keyblade?"

Roxas: "Shutup!"

Posted by: DGwildDog Jul 15 2010, 09:15 AM

After the credits roll in Sly 2: "You've won. Now go outside" lmao

Posted by: Banette Jul 15 2010, 09:57 AM

"DU-A-LIZE!" - NiGHTS (NiGHTS: Journey of Dreams)
"Go over and touch NiGHTS. You'll see what I mean. That is, of course, if your interested in that sort of thing." - Owl (NiGHTS: Journey of Dreams)
"Would you like to buy a pre-owned crotchitizer?" - Ratchet (Incorrect input on Tyrrhaguise) (Ratchet and Clank: Up Your Arsenal)
"I, I, I, want you, want you!" - Miror B. (Pokemon XD: Gale of Darkness)

Posted by: ShadowZoroark Jul 17 2010, 01:09 PM

In Kingdom Hearts, "The name's Axel. Got it memorised?"
That somehow really made me laugh...
Yeah, I'm a Kingdom Hearts fan!

Posted by: tomunderfire Jul 17 2010, 01:54 PM

"This isn't a game!" - Seem
Then Jak and Daxter look at the camera
Jak 3

Posted by: Kitzen Jul 19 2010, 10:58 PM

QUOTE(iRyu @ Jul 10 2010, 11:26 AM)

Posted by: Frigid Nate Jul 19 2010, 11:49 PM

Tales of Vesperia
Judith: Yay
Karol: Victory pose!"
Rita:(reading book)
Judith: Hey you too!
Rita: "Oh HELL no!!"

Posted by: vesetnet Jul 23 2010, 08:52 PM

Posted by: LuigiDEK Jul 27 2010, 07:18 AM

My favorite quote will always be in the beginning of assassin's creed 2 when Ezio meet his uncle Mario: "Don't you remember me it's a me a Mario".

Posted by: The Yatagarasu Jul 28 2010, 05:59 PM

"OBJECTION! ...I was hoping I'd come up with a question while objecting, Your Honor.

...I didn't."

-- Miles Edgeworth (Ace Attorney)

"So what if Polly was her name? My granddaughter has a dog named Phoenix! Does that mean that you're her fiance, Mr. Wright? She's only 7 years old!"
-- Manfred Von Karma (Ace Attorney)

Larry: I swear she was flying!
Edgeworth: Are...
Francizka: You...
Judge: HIGH!! That girl is really high in that picture!
(Trials & Tribulations)

Posted by: Lbot Jul 31 2010, 07:32 AM

these are all psychonauts quotes

after you punch open the trunk and view "the world shall taste my eggs!"
Raz: What the h*** was that?
---------------------

Camper: CHARGE! (gets shot)

Raz: that kid just got killed!

Coach Olyander:No I just kick his astro projection out of my mind, and I'll kick your astroprojection to... Cant remember what he says after that.
-------------------------------------
Raz to coach olyander: See you in h***!
---------------------------------------
And the sea will run white with his rage!
------------------------------------------
olyander: your like molasses running uphill... in January!
-----------------------------
So many more I can't really remember.
(I am not going to say bad words)

Posted by: Breeder Drew Jul 31 2010, 10:11 PM

ANYTHING Miror B says.

Posted by: Tysm Aug 7 2010, 05:27 PM

"Who... the hell... puts an evac station... on top of some goddamned stairs..." - Coach, L4D2 intro

"Com'on Coach... Maybe the helicopter... Maybe it's made of chocolate!" - Nick replying to Coach, L4D2 intro

---

(The following scene is from Meet the Spy, Team Fortress 2.)

*Alarm goes off, RED Spy in the base, Soldier goes to the intel room's door and Scout's there*

"Yo, little help here?" - Scout

"Get away son. Let me put the password. 1, 1, 1, erm... 1!" - Soldier

"INCOMING!" - Heavy comes rushing in and breaks the door open, pushing the Soldier and the Scout

"AAAHH! AAAH! OOH- Hey, it's still here! 8D" - Scout, after a lot of screaming.

---

"There once was a man who had a lot of money! Then he used his fight money to buy a pair of every animal on Earth. Then he herd them on a boat, and then he beat the crap out of every single one of them!" - Soldier, Meet the Soldier, TF2.

---

"You RED team sissies call that breaking my spine? You wouldn't know how to break a spine even if- AAOOH, MY SPINE!" - Soldier, Meet the Sandvich, TF2.

---

"Son, I'm going to blow that damn look out of your stoopid face." - Engineer, TF2.

---

"And that, my friends, is how you do it!" - Nick, L4D2 after reaching the saferoom.

---

(And of course, the classic.)

"Aah, TITS." - Nick, L4D2, voice command.

Posted by: JosiePika Aug 7 2010, 06:24 PM

You've been fully revitalized!
...but you're still hungry...

Yes, I have been playing Chrono Trigger!

Posted by: Bones Aug 8 2010, 11:29 PM

In Dragonball Z Budokai 2 (I think) Android 16 says "I am an Android designed to kill you.......Goku I am going to kill you."

Oh, okay. thanks for clearing that up.

Posted by: The Composer Aug 8 2010, 11:56 PM

Considering All the TWEWY ones Here, Someone probably already said this

"Come get some Hot Stuff!"

Mick, The World Ends with You

Posted by: Meta Knightmare Aug 10 2010, 04:51 PM

KSSU:

"Nooo! My secret stash of food and 1-Ups!"
"So You were the one hoarding them! You scallywag!"
"(They looked delicious!)"

Posted by: kazzaz Aug 16 2010, 10:30 AM

Fire emblem shadow dragon.

Tiki"So can I join you?" Marth"Yes" Tiki"Yay! Thank you Mar-Mar!" Marth"....Mar-mar..?Tiki"Am I not allowed to call you that?" Marth"No..you can call me...uh that if you want...."Tiki"Yay! Thank you Mar-mar!" Marth"Um..your...welcome?"

Posted by: Count Bleck Aug 20 2010, 03:56 PM

BlazeBlue, Arakune's story after win/lose to Noel

"Must devour her. In order to eliminate waste."

"Don't come near me!"

*gun noises*

"ughh... gyoh..."

*moments later after indecisoin on what to do with Arakune"s, bullet ridden sludge body*

"....Ah?"

*Insane ramblings*

"It's still alive?!"

*more shots*
"Is it dead?"

"...glugh... aggh.."

"Why are you still alive? Wait, don't hurt me!"

*guns and explosions*

"Is it dead this time?"

"..."

Posted by: Breeder Drew Aug 20 2010, 04:25 PM

FALCAWN PAWNCH! From F-Zero.

Posted by: megapoke Aug 22 2010, 04:02 AM

Cuz I do!(slim)
Master has returned!Meowmaid rejoices!(meowmaid)
CTRL ALT DEL!(fracktail)
All from super paper mario

Posted by: Wastelander Aug 22 2010, 04:11 AM

"This isn't a game!" Seem, Jak 3.

Posted by: Gijinka overload Aug 22 2010, 05:52 AM

'The Princess is in another Castel'-Mario Bros.
'I can't let you do that,Star Fox'-Star Fox
'Hi! I heard you finished 21 floors in the battle pyramid! Thats amazing!...Did you find any rare pokemon up there?'-Pokemon Emerald.
'Oops, I just dropped my balls!'-Some random Juggler from Pokemon RBY
'The air is tasty here!'-Some kid west of Mauville City

Posted by: Gemblast Aug 22 2010, 06:03 AM

Sonic Chronicles, When you go to Ix...and stuff, bla bla bla, Sonic says:
"Didn't your mom learn you that it's no good to steal stuff that belong to others?"(I think it was)
Then Ix called sonic and his friends Worms, and blablabla...Battle began, 8D

Posted by: ShoMinamimoto Sep 6 2010, 09:17 PM

"SO ZETTA SLOW"

he also tends to replace curses for the word "factor"


funny stuff man.

Posted by: Zooooooooo Sep 10 2010, 09:36 PM

"All your base are belong to us!"-Zero Wing

"A winner is you!"-Pro Wrestling

"I'm here to kick butt and chew bubblegum, and I'm all out of gum."-Duke Nukem

"Do a Barrel Roll(Z or R twice)!"-Star Fox 64

"Use Bombs wisely!"-Star Fox 64

"Dodongo dislikes fire"-Legend of Zelda

"I am error"-Zelda II: Adventures of Link

"I'd buy that for a dollar!"-Smash TV

"Conglaturation! You have beaten a great game!"-Ghostbusters

"Point Get!"-Various Japanese games

"Victoly!"-Samurai Shodown

Posted by: AetherWolf Sep 23 2010, 07:03 PM

The "...He said to take two grown-ups. :/" scene in Birth by Sleep. Ventus is adorable. <3

Posted by: Breeder Drew Sep 23 2010, 07:20 PM

"The cake is a lie!" Portal
"I like shorts!" Pokemon
"Oops! I dropped my balls!" Pokemon (XD)

Posted by: Dark Lyra Sep 23 2010, 08:01 PM

"Come on Gordon, crank that thing!" ~Alyx Vance, Half Life 2 Episode 1

Posted by: Gliscario Sep 23 2010, 08:09 PM

Otacon- "Ok Snake, you need to switch to Disc 2 now."

Snake- "What do you mean?"

Otacon- "Well, in the game case, you see two- oh, wait! We're on the PS3, so we're on a Blue-ray Disc!"

Snake- "Dammit, Otacon, get a grip!"

MGS4. Love that game.

Posted by: Dark Lyra Sep 24 2010, 05:29 AM

"Entire team is babies!" ~Heavy, Team Fortress 2
"Gentlemen." ~Spy, Team Fortress 2

Posted by: marshtomp1 Sep 24 2010, 08:05 AM

"It's the FNG Sir"Said the soldiers to captian Price-Call of duty 4(FNG-F****g new guy)

Posted by: Purnip Sep 24 2010, 03:51 PM

"I can't wait to bomb some dodongoes!" - Zelda CDI

"Didn't we have some fun though? Remember when the platform was sliding into the fire pit and I said 'Goodbye,' and you were like [in low pitched voice]'No way,' Then I was all like 'We pretended we were going to murder you?'[sigh] That was great." - Portal {GlaDos is chock full of epic quotes. Her partime job is an epic-quote factory}.

Someone mentioned the 'drop my balls' quote earlier, and I must say you are fantastic. I'm upset that they didn't continue that in HeartGold and SoulSilver.

Posted by: Dark Lyra Sep 25 2010, 06:52 AM

"Spy's sapp'n my sentry!" ~Engineer, Team Fortress 2
"I eat your sandviches!" ~Scout, Team Fortress 2
"Do you smell something burning?" ~Curiosity Core, Portal
"I have an idea. But it's bloody dangerous. 3, 2, 1... AAAUUGGGGHHHH!!! Oh, for God's sake. They told me; that if I turn this flashlight on, I would die. They-they told me that for everything! I mean, I don't know why they even bother giving me this stuff if they don't want me to use it; it's-it's pointless!" ~Wheatley, Portal 2
"Do you realize what you have just done?! You are insane. Seriously, you thought this thing would stop me? You are pathetic. And you are way too late." ~GLaDOS, Portal Prelude

Posted by: Puzzle Master Sensei Sep 25 2010, 07:25 PM

"Curse you Layton! Curse you and that foppish hat of yours!" -Don Paolo, upon being revealed in Diabolical Box.

I laughed out loud, then looked up Foppish, which means silly. LAYTON'S HAT IS NOT SILLY. Then I laughed even more.

Posted by: Dark Lyra Sep 25 2010, 11:08 PM

"Unless it's a farm!" ~Soldier, Team Fortress 2

Posted by: Zapi the Pikachu Sep 27 2010, 05:20 PM

Super Paper Mario keeps coming to mind, so...

"NO! I'M NOT SWEET!" ~Bowser

"Bleh heh heh heh heh... This pleases Count Bleck!"~Count Bleck, obviously

"And so I arrive, like a sudden windstorm at a kindergarten picnic!"~Dimentio

"And here I thought Mimi's idea of a perfect world was a gem-filled pool with hunky lifeguards..."~Dimentio again XD

"You must be Bowser. I knew the moment I saw the flailing nubbins you call arms."~Dimentio yet again

"I AM ERROR!"~Fracktail

"That's my bro, always bouncing back! Like me! I bounce too!"~Luigi <3

"Hey, Mr. Getsfoiledallthetimebytheredguywiththemustache! I'll foil your FACE!"~Mr. L XD I love hiiiimm~ and every other quote by Mr. L. <3

"GREEEEEEEEN!"~Super Dimentio

"Coins?! No one uses COINS anymore, you peasants! I SPIT on your coins!"~Mimi

"I fell through too, and landed right on Bowser! It was a surprisingly soft landing..."~Peach

And this...
"So it must fall to you!"
"Will you search for this missing person in my place?"
No.
"What?! You would refuse me?"
"Do you not know the fate of those who defy Jaydes?"
"I will ask you once again... Will you please search for Luvbi in my stead?"
No.
"Still you do not agree?"
"I must warn you... I can be very persuasive."
"I will ask you yet again. Will you please search for Luvbi in my stead?"
No.
"You are a stubborn creature. This is your last chance... and I mean that."
"I will ask one last time... Will you please search for Lubvi in my stead?"
No.
"I see... Then we are done here, it seems."
"You will spend the rest of eternity in the foulest corner of The Underwhere!"
"Farewell, mustached shayde! OhOhOhOhOhOhOhOhOhOhO!"~Jaydes

Posted by: Fuzzbucket Sep 27 2010, 05:38 PM

For me it's:
"Youngster? Heavens no! Call me 'Shorts man!'" ~ Youngster - Pokemon

"Lately I've been wondering, how much longer am I going to be wearing shorts, I mean, if I grow old like this will people call me something silly like'Shorts man'?" ~ Youngster - also pokemon (Seriously, that must be some kind of in-joke at Nintendo or something)

and finally:
"GET A LOAD OF- GET A LOAD OF- GET A LOAD OF THIIIIS!!" ~ Dr. Robotnik - Sonic adventure 1

Posted by: Zapi the Pikachu Sep 27 2010, 06:41 PM

^Don't forget YOU KNOW WHAT THEY SAY, THE MORE THE MERRIER!
God, I hate Eggman. But at least his annoying quotes are somewhat funny.

That reminds me, there was this one thing Sonic says in the very beginning of SA2, after narrowly escaping some enemy plane...
"Man, this plane is boring! They're aren't even any snacks!"
Or something. XD

And omg I forgot about the CDI games...basically every quote from them.

Posted by: Windripper Sep 28 2010, 10:59 AM

"The ESRB would go nuts!" - Atelier Iris
"All your base are belong to us!" - Zero Wing
"I don't have your stone, and fuck you anyway!" - Alone in the Dark
"Now flooding enrichment center with deadly neurotoxin. I remembered what that thing you destroyed was. It was installed to stop me from flooding the enrichment center with a deadly neurotoxin." - Portal

Posted by: NINJA WIGGLYTUFF Sep 29 2010, 11:40 AM

soldier 'Eeeeeeeeer, is that a grenade?'
commander 'Don't be daft, c'mon, lets move!'
*Pew pew! *
BOOOOOOOM!
soldier 'he, he.............oh'

Halo reach. LOL!

Posted by: Dark Lyra Sep 29 2010, 06:49 PM

"Engineer is credit to team!" ~Heavy, Team Fortress 2

Posted by: Jirah Sep 29 2010, 07:00 PM

More super paper mario.

*Peach enters the geek Francis's room*
"Francis: O-O-Oh... O-Oh my gosh... It's... It's a h-hot babe..."

Everything that comes after that gave me good lols.

Posted by: MasterofEmpoleon Sep 29 2010, 08:18 PM

"I need you to save my cat from those Ninjas." Little Big Planet

Posted by: Sakurai Oct 12 2010, 08:44 PM

"Teamwork means staying out of my way!" - Seifer, Final Fantasy VIII

"(Leader? I never asked to be the leader. I've had it up to here with this leader thing... Alright, alright... I'll choose.)" - Squall (thoughts on being Leader), Final Fantasy VIII

"I dreamt I was a moron." - Squall (dreaming about Laguna), Final Fantasy VIII

There are so many great quotes in this game!

Posted by: Lirrin Oct 13 2010, 12:27 AM

"Hey! We still haven't gotten our paycheck yet!" - Vector, end of Sonic Heroes Final Story.

"It's here! We've got work! We've got work!" - Charmy Bee, Start of Sonic Heroes Chaotix Story.

" Yeah! Time to Rock and roll!" - Charmy Bee, Sonic Heroes Team Rose vs. Team Chaotix.

Posted by: Jesen Oct 13 2010, 11:19 AM

"I'm going to party like it's 999!" - Gheed, after beating Andariel (Diablo II)

Posted by: Dark Lyra Oct 15 2010, 12:41 AM

"Need a dispenser here!" ~Scout, Team Fortress 2

Posted by: FrenzyClinic Oct 15 2010, 07:20 AM

Resident Evil (1996)

Barry Burton: "Jill, here's a lockpick. It might come in handy if you, the master of unlocking, take it with you."

Barry Burton: "That was too close. You were almost a Jill sandwich!"

Posted by: Breeder Drew Oct 15 2010, 03:20 PM

"FU*K THE PEN! CHOOSE THE SWORD!" Not sure which.
"Falcawn... PAWNCH!" F-Zero
"All your base are belong to us." Can't remember the title.

Posted by: Silvair Oct 15 2010, 06:19 PM

"OBJECTION!" (Phoenix Wright. Ace Attorney. Obvious, no?)
"All your base are belong to us." (sjdfiasdjajf can't remember)
"Now I remember why you're my archnemesis. You're so annoyingly hard to squish!" (Bowser from some Mario game that I forget.)

Posted by: DrDestroy Oct 15 2010, 09:05 PM

" give me my stone!"
"I don't have your stone and FUCK you anyway"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5k8KYp0aaJY

Posted by: Zish Oct 22 2010, 10:50 AM

World of Warcraft, some quest where you have to disguise yourself and talk to an alli priest/ archbishop.

Priest: You wish to speak with me? Come, come with me, my child.
*you walk to a cliff edge*

Priest: You foolish boy. When will you ever learn. I can see right through your disguise, Zish. Well, here are news for you... You will never take me alive!!! AIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *jumps off cliff*

... ... ... *splat*


I nearly wet myself. In the Greek services, they say 'Kai nin kai ai' which is something along the lines of 'Forever and Always'. IT'S JUST SO FITTING THAT THE ALLI HUMAN ARCHBISHOP SCREAMS 'AIIIIIIIIII' WHILE FALLING DOWN A CLIFF. I still haven't gotten over it to this day.

Posted by: The Aztec God Of Spoons Oct 28 2010, 07:44 PM

Sly 3:

Guard: Her lasagna is so good, I think I could die in it! (Or something along those lines)

Posted by: Jadiebloop Oct 29 2010, 06:07 AM

Anything that the Mr. Saturns from the Earthbound series say

Posted by: The Lilac Pilgrim Oct 29 2010, 06:20 AM

Goodness, there are so many...

Metal Gear Solid series:
Snake: What happened to the music?

Psycho Mantis: (on Snake's negative reaction to Meryl) Huh? You don't like girls?!

Naomi: That tune is his mind-control music!

Otacon: Hold it, Snake! Time to change the disc. I know, I know, it's a pain. But you need to swap Disc 1 for Disc 2. You see the Disc labelled "2"?
Snake: Uh, no?
Otacon: Huh? Oh! We're on Playstation 3! It's a Blu-Ray disc! Dual-layered, too. No need to swap!
Snake: Dammit, Otacon, get a grip!
Otacon: Yeah, what an age we live in, huh, Snake? What'll they think of next?

There are more from MGS and its non-existent fourth wall but I could end up taking up a whole page :P

Professor Layton

Luke: Don't worry, professor! No-one would even dream of stealing the Laytonmobile!

Professor Layton: I take it that didn't go well?
Luke: No; I can't even look at that guy without him snapping at me!
Professor Layton: Ha ha! And all this time I thought you were good at communicating with wild animals!

I'd list more but I have work in... five minutes :P

Posted by: The Ghostly Banette Nov 5 2010, 01:57 PM

Halo 3

Elite: Is there something in my teeth?!

Brute: We will turn you into BLOODY RIBBONS!

Grunt: Don't hurt me! Brutes stinky! Me make sure no-one hurt mighty Arbiter...heheheh...eh?

Posted by: General Rike Nov 19 2010, 08:02 PM

"Hah! Check it out! It's got wings!" - Dante in Devil May Cry 4. Made my day.

"This isn't a game!" Seem in Jak 3.

"A love that crushes like a mace." Manah in Drakengard, before being crushed by a golem.

"No need to thank me, <name>. It's the least I could do.
Good day!"
"But..."
"I said GOOD DAY!" "Shouldn't you be saving the world?" Azuregos and player in World of Warcraft after having a conversation.

There are too many funny quotes I can't remember. :l

Posted by: Kenny McCormick Nov 23 2010, 03:03 PM

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=445WDHSH58k
[Muffled]
"Mattias, please, sit down."
"He can't, He got shot in the ass."

Made me laugh so hard the first time I heard it.

Posted by: Daxdiv Nov 25 2010, 01:32 AM

This is my favorite exchange from Poker Night at the Inventory: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FFAMTBxJ8yM

Heavy: I am reminded of time Engineer killed my entire team

Tycho: Damn Heavy, that's uh... heavy. I'm sorry to hear that.

Heavy: I search entire base for him. He tries to kill me with turret and mini-turret, but I crush his toys like they are made of Paper

Strong Bad: Sounds like some crappy toys if you ask me.

Heavy: Then I find him. Hiding behind teleporter. I take his gun away from him. He tries to hit me with wrench! Hahaha! So I take wrench away from him. I take his wrench and shove it down his throat, all the way down to the handle.

Tycho: Christ!

Heavy: Then I rip off all his fingers, one by one. Let's see you build toys NOW! (Laughs) THERE IS BLOOD EVERYWHERE! AND HE IS CRYING! (Laughs) I THINK HE CRIES OUT FOR HIS MOTHER...BUT... BUT (Laughing, somewhat out of air), BUT WRENCH IS STUCK IN THROAT! And it sounds like (garble, garble, garble)! Is this not the funniest thing?!?

(Max is shocked at the story)

(Tycho shakes his head with a scared face)

Strong Bad: That is some bleeped up bleep man!

I should also note that during this exchange, Strong Bad's cursing was censored and even the subtitled had it say bleep instead of using the asterisk, which is what Tycho has whenever any of his dialog involves cursing. It's censored if you did disable the blocking of the swears, which is mostly for Tycho's sake, since if you read Penny Arcade, you know they can't go any strip without one utter of any 4 letter curse words. Trust me, if you watch the scene in question, you'll know what words he was using. What made this work for me is that Max, who wants to hurt everything, is shocked at what the Heavy did, and that Strong Bad, of all people, cursed out like that, considering the only language he ever used in any of his series that I can recall, is the usage of the word "Crap"

Posted by: BeyondTheFail Dec 5 2010, 09:42 AM

"Sometimes, justice is just a pretty word. Other times, justice is three feet of steel hittin' you in the face!" ~ Boz Wilde, Suikoden V

Posted by: A Dark Pokemon Trainer Dec 5 2010, 10:35 AM

FUNnY ONE!

Halo Reach~ Jun To Covenant

"So you do not like my cooking?"

Posted by: Mars Adept Enten Dec 20 2010, 05:56 PM

Here's some funny lines I found in Shadows of Almia and Guardian Signs:

"If you bust crates, they get broken!" -Team Dim Sun Minion in the Quest, "Team Dim Sun's Appetite".
(Yeah... thank you, peanut gallery.)

"The only thing mini here is your brain." -Kincaid, in the Mission, "Reveal the Hideout's Secrets".
(Too funny to not include!)

"Warranty violation? It's not a household appliance!" -Burkhart, in "Liberate the Wireless Tower", responding to Voice Nav.'s comment about improper charging.

"Warranty? You're not a household appliance!" -Nema, after Mission Clear in "Liberate the Wireless Tower", but before she adds Sign Mode to the Styler, responding to Voice Nav.'s comment about unauthorized modification.
(I just love these two lines and always bust out laughing whenever I get to this Mission!)

"Also, be careful of the flying plates." -Voice Nav., in the Mission, "Investigate the Old Mansion", warning you about the flying plates, natch.
(Um... dur! The flying plates are a health and sanity hazard! Of course I should be careful about them!)

"Shall we buckle down on the maitenance work to the Wireless Tower?" -man who gives you the Quest, "Chase the Flying Tools", after you return the tools and he finds a belt buckle in the items that Beldum took, and Burkhart mentions that it's his belt buckle.
(*groans loudly* That's just one heck of a bad pun that I couldn't let slip unnoticed.)

"ARE YOU SERIOUS? Did someone spill their juice on the Wireless Tower, too?" -Murph, before the start of the Mission, "Investigate the Old Mansion", responding to Voice Nav.'s comment that communication to other regions is currently impossible.
(I always bust out laughing at this particular line for some reason, but I don't know why.)

"WE'VE GOT A BIG PROBLEM!"
*your partner asks what's wrong*
"I found a hole in the hull of The Union!"
*your partner reacts in disbelief*
"Was it when I hit those logs floating in the water?" -the discussion between your partner and Murph before the start of the Mission, "Protect Moltres" about the status of The Union.

"What now? What's that racket?" -Booker, before you ask him to repair The Union before the start of the Mission, "Protect Moltres".

"It's really The Union? Not some hunk of junk called The Minion or something?" -Booker, after your partner tells him about the situation with The Union before the start of the Mission, "Protect Moltres".
(Some Mission 7 silliness I find amusing.)

Pretty much any of Nick's pessimistic daydreams.

The entire discussion with the Z.Z. Sisters in the Mission, "Protect Moltres", especially the comment about how the Sister who talks normally is "stuck with a girl who takes a month to finish a sentence and one who can't finish one!" and how "Honestly," she's "sick of it!" and the overuse of abbreviations in this gem of a line:
"Basically, no p'chute skyd'ing with Plasma C's!" (Yes, that is the actual way it's written in-game.)

And there's a line in the Mission "Rescue Nema and Leanne" that I can't remember verbatim, but it's where Murph is scolding Rand about messing up the bandages he was trying to apply.

So yeah. The Ranger series has really good writing, IMO.

Posted by: Giggapuff Dec 23 2010, 11:01 AM

Everything so shiny and pretty...AND IT WANTS TO DESTROY US!

Spongebob in Nicktoons: Attack of the toybots.

Posted by: Black Rock Shooter Dec 29 2010, 07:46 AM

"You live in a van!" ~The Spy (after dominating an enemy Sniper), Team Fortress 2

Posted by: rileyup Dec 31 2010, 06:25 PM

the air is tasty here pkmn ruby

Posted by: AkaruTheYoshi Dec 31 2010, 09:29 PM

All of these are from Sonic Colors (These are also all from Eggman. Sheesh, he's quotable.):

"Would the owner of a white hovercar shaped like an egg please report to the front desk. Your car has been broken into. Repeat, would the owner of a white hovercar shaped like an egg please report to the front desk. Your car has been broken i-Wait a minute, what the heck?"

"We know they look delicious, but please refrain from licking the rides. That would be disgusting. Do you know where those rides have been? People have been sitting on those rides! With their BUTTS!...Okay, go ahead and lick them, but don't say we didn't warn you."

"Please refrain from peeling off the space-age polymer holding the starship together. It may look and feel like duct tape, but it's not. It's called...um...Space...Tape. Very advanced stuff."

"Welcome to the Exotic Aquarium. Any water you mat notice on the floor is the result of our diligent house cleaning staff's mopping, and not evidence of a dangerous leak in the...D'oh, heck with it, RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!"

You can hear more http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2zDlwgQN9pU&feature=player_embedded#at=258

Posted by: Magishizu Jan 17 2011, 11:44 AM

"What?Even burnt I'd still be tasty?IDIOT!How many times do I have to tell you I am not food?"That's a quote from the Grand Elder in "The Munchables."

Posted by: Abufi Jan 17 2011, 01:44 PM

you know, pretty much 80% of the dialogue in team fortress 2. that game is thick with the stench of humor.

Posted by: FouLu Jan 17 2011, 04:48 PM

"We are merely sprites that dance at the beck and call of our button-pressing overlord!"

"Let the noodles boil over medium heat, stir in the contents of the sauce packet and simmer."

"Somebody is watching over us... controlling us. It's true, I tell you. It's true."

"This is a video game. Don't you see? We are characters in a video game!"

-The old Man in the City called Alemachena in the Game Secret of Evermore.
He has some more funny Quotes, but that are the best. xD

Posted by: Mars Adept Enten Jan 28 2011, 04:22 PM

I've been playing Spirit Tracks and found this gem:

"As far as I'm concerned, outside of bananas, nothing looks good in yellow!" -random Anouki when you're talking to them to find the correct pairs for Honcho.

Posted by: Cachulo Jan 28 2011, 04:25 PM

X-Men Arcade:

Magneto: X-Men... Welcome.. to DIE!!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IdAmkx8eAos

Posted by: Mikan Lover Nami Jan 28 2011, 05:38 PM

"Don't worry, Dragonforce can't play it either." -loading screen on Guitar Hero

"Hey, I think he died! Are you dead?" -Conker to inactive player, Conker's Bad Fur Day

"Oh man, I shouldn't have called him a perv..." Ethan Waber, Phantasy Star Universe

"You'll have to excuse him. He's uh... special." Kakashi Hatake, Naruto Path of the Ninja

"And today's doofus of the town award goes to... your face!" -Talking to a resident after being stung by a bee, Animal Crossing

"Hehhe. Smells like someone forgot to take a bath." -Lucaim Nav, Phantasy Star Universe

Edit: How could I forget these?!

"I think explosions are pretty!"
"They have to traverse what I like to call the "Chasm of Endless Falling and Eventual Dying". Good luck kids!"
"And they're gonna be squashed like pancakes! With syrup, and butter, and jam, and a little orange garnish on top and--say, can I have breakfast for dinner or is that just weird?"
And pretty much everything else Dallas says from Ratchet: Deadlocked

Posted by: Strong Sad Feb 2 2011, 03:54 PM

"How many times do I have to keep telling those idiots? If you're the last one in, lock the gate!"
--Bowser, Super Paper Mario

Posted by: pika5998 Feb 5 2011, 06:49 PM

QUOTE(Shirosaki @ Jan 28 2009, 11:44 AM)

Posted by: Merchant Feb 5 2011, 06:58 PM

Alone in the Dark - 2008

Edward Carnby: "I'm the Light Bringer! I'm the fucking universe!"

Posted by: Phoenix Rising Feb 5 2011, 06:58 PM

Pokemon Diamond:
The kid who shows you around Oreberg:...You don't have any badges yet so other trainers will view you as a total noob.

Digimon World Dusk/Dawn: Random Boss: Mua ha ha....what? I was defeated? Dang it!
Second Boss: What? Did I attack you? I can't remember anything, anyways I'm going home to take a nap.

Posted by: Pyramid Head Feb 6 2011, 03:40 PM

This is definitely my favorite line from Homestuck:

CG: TELL HER TO POLISH MY HEAVING BONE BULGE AND SET A TABLE FOR FUCKING TWO ON IT.
CG: ITS FOR OUR CANDLE LIGHT HATE DATE.

I fukken Lol'd so much. And then posted it on Facebook. Ahahaha.

Posted by: Breeder Drew Feb 6 2011, 03:56 PM

Call Of Duty 2:

"You hear that Davis got sent home?"

"Lucky bastard."

"That "lucky bastard" lost his leg."

Posted by: Mars Adept Enten Feb 9 2011, 11:52 AM

Some Phantom Hourglass lines I found last night that I found amusing:

"What? You hate pegs? They do something to you? Go on, give it a try!" -random Anouki on the Isle of Frost, who asks you to leap onto a grappling hook peg

"I'm yellow, but I don't taste anything like a delicious fruit!" -Ciela, when talking to the Yook impostor in the Anouki Estates

Zelda games always have excellent writing.

Posted by: Sassofonista Feb 10 2011, 09:44 AM

From Tales of Symphonia...

Presea: Sure,go ahead. Make my day.
*Lloyd and Genis try to drag a big chunk of wood and fail. Miserably.*
*Presea drags it away with one hand*
Lloyd: I've lost all confidence as a man...

I dunno if someone said that already, but I loved that scene. And also, basically anything Zelos says is hilarious...

Posted by: The Letter W Feb 10 2011, 04:40 PM

"My blood! He punched out all my blood!" -The Scout in the Meet the Sandvich trailer. So it's not actually in the game, but close enough. Goes nicely with "He's like a bear, a big shaved bear that hates people!" which you can find by digging through the audio files.
"Don't run! It's just ham!" That's one of my favourites too. c:

Posted by: duck Feb 14 2011, 02:17 PM

Super Mario Sunshine:

D.E.B.S. ALERT It's been reported that a lone yoshi egg has been spotted on a rooftop.

in the great words of chugaaconry: WHAT KIND OF CIVILISATION USES IT'S NEWS TO REPORT AN EGG?????

Posted by: Mercenary Raven Feb 14 2011, 04:09 PM

QUOTE(Sassofonista @ Feb 10 2011, 09:44 AM)

Posted by: Black Rock Shooter Feb 16 2011, 05:49 AM

"Keep in mind that this is not a competition. If it was, though, Orange would be winning." ~GLaDOS, Portal 2 (Co-Op Campaign)

Posted by: Tekno Feb 16 2011, 05:26 PM

QUOTE(The Letter W @ Feb 10 2011, 09:40 PM)

QUOTE(Black Rock Shooter @ Feb 16 2011, 10:49 AM)

Posted by: Black Rock Shooter Feb 17 2011, 03:50 AM

"He's already dead! HE'S ALREADY DEEEEAAADDD!!" ~Scout, Team Fortress 2 (unused line in Meet the Sandvich)
"Don't believe me? Here, I'll put you on. Hellooo! THAT'S YOU! THAT'S HOW DUMB YOU SOUND!" ~GLaDOS, Portal

Oh, GLaDOS~ You've got the funniest lines ever~

Posted by: Gambrinous Antiscian Feb 17 2011, 04:13 AM

Victor Sullivan:

Man, this is like trying to find a bride in a brothel. (Uncharted: Drake's fortune)

Phew - I'm sweating like a hooker in church. (Uncharted 2: Among Thieves)

Posted by: Merchant Feb 17 2011, 06:19 AM

Enchanted Arms - 2006/2007

Some time after defeating the Sphinx:

Yuki: "Sorry to keep you!"
Karin: "Sorry!"
Atsuma: "What? You two were together?"
Karin: "By coincidence only."
Atsuma: "I was worried, you seemed to take so long... doing whatever it is girls do on the toilet."

Oh, Atsuma... You crack me up.

-------------

After the Queen of Ice visits Kyoto:

Tokimune: "Fuh... hah... hah... hah..."
Honoka: "Lord Tokimune, are you ok?!"
Tokimune: "H h h h h h how can you ask that?! B b b b b b b b b....!"
Honoka: "B...? My Lord?"
Tokimune: "Bring me fresh underwear!"

Dude. TMI.

Posted by: Tekno Feb 17 2011, 09:17 AM

*guy falls onto a saw and dies*
"I saw what you did there." - Chuck, Dead Rising 2.

Posted by: TydinRyn Feb 20 2011, 04:30 AM

Ah BlazBlue: Continuum Shift... You always make my day:

Ragna the Bloodedge's Gag Reel:

Ragna: Wait, so if I'm dead... and we're on the same boat together... does that mean you guys are both...?
Rachel & Tager: Ghosts.
Ragna: *girly scream*
---

Iron Tager's Gag Reel:

(Silver) Hakumen: I am the white void! I am...etc., etc.,... THE END HAS COME.
---

And lastly from Rachel Alucard's Gag Reel:

(Platinum the Trinity) Luna: Why do you have to be so mean! I hate you Ragna! I hate you! I...I...*sniff* LOVE you!
Ragna: WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?
Rachel: Oh my...

Posted by: rileyup Feb 22 2011, 08:46 AM

pokemon ruby:
"what if i hook up a big one while im in the washroom""i lost because i didnt go to the washroom"
pokemon xd :"our food bill is also sixfold!"

Posted by: RetinaMagnet Feb 22 2011, 12:31 PM

"Hold on to your drawers, and don't piss in 'em!" --- Cid, Final Fantasy VII. I burst out laughing when I first saw that line. xD

"Shut up! Sit your ass down in that chair and drink your goddamn TEA!" --- Cid, Final Fantasy VII.

Ohhh, Cid. XD

Posted by: xJoshua Feb 22 2011, 05:16 PM

From Red Blue Yellow
The Juggler would say " Oops dropped my balls!"

And that awkward moment when Shiki told Neku to take his pants off. 0.o

Posted by: Nightmare Vocaloid Feb 25 2011, 12:55 AM

Team Fortress 2:

MEET THE SPY:
Scout: What are you, president of his fanclub?
Spy: No, that would be your mother.

Posted by: Gato Feb 26 2011, 09:00 PM

I can't believe I didn't see this one.

"This guy are sick!" - Aeris FFVII

"He went to Macereana Temple or something.

Macalania.

Aye!" - Tidus and Wakka FFX [The way Tidus says "aye" just kills me every time.]

"Well, why didn't you stop him???

Because I left my bazooka at home! Sheesh!" - Mallow and a Mushroom Kingdom Guard Super Mario RPG

"The hell? A finger?" - Cloud FFVII

Also any and all of the Terror Mask's dialogue from the Splatterhouse remake. Though a few of my favorites are:

"Whoa, no need to yell, Rick. I'm here inside your head, wrapped around your cerebellum." [So much emphasis on the italic parts!]

"I'm in your head, kid. I know your favorite cereal, your favorite movie....I even know what you like to do when you're alone with that little girl of yours...heh heh."

[Mimicing Jennifer's voice poorly.] "Oooh! Stop it Doctor West!!" "Oooh, Doctor West! It's so BIIIIG!"

"See, it's shit like this that got us the 'M' rating."

Posted by: Saku Feb 26 2011, 11:12 PM

I'm going to have to go with almost every quote from Portal?

Posted by: Dr Higginbotham Feb 27 2011, 01:20 AM

"Do you use the stylus? Don't even think about tapping me." Stella in Battle Records, Dragon Quest IX: Sentinels of the Starry Skies.

"If you approach an enemy from behind, it's that much easier to get the drop on them!" Stella in Battle Records, Dragon Quest IX: Sentinels of the Starry Skies.

"Exterminator-Awarded to SS for saving the world, and taking as many monsters as mortally possible down while doing it." Accolade of Exterminator, Dragon Quest IX: Sentinels of the Starry Skies.

Posted by: lanyard Feb 27 2011, 06:57 PM

in assassin's creed 2 when Ezio's uncle says "it's a me Mario!"

Posted by: Tekno Feb 28 2011, 07:47 AM

So I was playing a game of Convoy in TF2 yesterday when a guy shouts from his mic:

"OH GOD! I don't even know where he came from! I only know he came from behind which is rather SEXY"

I lol'd so hard. And it is in a video game to technically it counts too.

Posted by: BarkAtTheMoon Feb 28 2011, 05:57 PM

I'm not sure why, but I find "Everything in that general direction must be destroyed!" in Brutal Legend funny

Posted by: Dr Higginbotham Feb 28 2011, 06:25 PM

Nearly everything that Avalon says in LBP2, including "My inpregnable fortress has been impregnated! Show the Negativitron's minions no mercy! Send them spinning into the bowels of heck!" or something along those lines.

Posted by: Mister Blah Feb 28 2011, 08:42 PM

[Princess Toadstool is crying.]

Booster: Oh. My dear. What is this? Water coming from your eyes. Are you... leaking, my dear?

[Booster licks the tears.]

Booster: Tastes salty!

Posted by: kirbyking Mar 1 2011, 12:48 PM

This had to have been said before but.

Cat: How are you gentlemen?
All your base are belong to us.
You are one the way to destruction.
Captain: What you say!!
Cat: You have no chance to survive, make your time.
HA HA HA HA!!!

Posted by: shadowdorothy Mar 1 2011, 11:07 PM

Oh no! Someone has set us up the bomb.

you forgot to add that.

Posted by: DeadSpaceFan Mar 2 2011, 05:09 PM

"I am the Great Mighty Poo, and I'm going to throw my !@#$ at you!" ~ Conker's Bad Fur Day.

Posted by: Darkrow Mar 2 2011, 05:20 PM

QUOTE(DeadSpaceFan @ Mar 2 2011, 05:09 PM)

Posted by: AdmiralPerry Mar 18 2011, 07:38 PM

Why has no one else posted here? Lot of great quotes, both familiar and not. Well, here's a few; maybe someone else will respond?


From Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood, Da Vinci Disappearance DLC
Salai: But we can't see invisible ink. Can we? (pauses) Ezio! Use your gift! (referring to Ezio's Eagle Vision)
Ezio (grumpily): You know about that, too?
(Apparently, Leonardo is a blabbermouth.)

Also, just about anything Bartolomeo d'Alviano has to say qualifies as hilarious.

From Assassin's Creed
Desmond: Ooh, I wonder who I get to kill today?


I had some more, but my mind decided to blank out on me.

Posted by: Sloth Mar 19 2011, 06:14 AM

From Curse of Monkey Island:

Elaine Marley: You know... I don't think my father would approve of me dating the undead, and you're probably too nice a zombie-pirate for me anyway. Let's just be friends instead.

Guybrush: Do you know anything about lifting curses?
Murray: Oh, right. I know a lot about lifting curses. That's why I'm a disembodied talking skull sitting on top of a spike in the middle of a swamp.
Guybrush: You seem bitter.
Murray: I'm sorry. It's been a rough day.

Guybrush: Die? D-D-Did you say, 'd-die'? As in me, dead?
Voodoo Lady: Oh Guybrush, don't be such a baby.

Lemonhead: Shut up, or I'll eat you.

Guybrush: How do I get out of this crypt?
Ghost Bride: There's no way out of this crypt for either of us. I must haunt this lonely tomb until I've married a man I truly love. And you can't leave because the door's locked.

Posted by: Nightmare Vocaloid Apr 10 2011, 02:27 AM

From NFS: Most Wanted:

Cross: I want every single unit on this guy.
???: Everyone?
Cross: EVERYONE!

Posted by: Dr Higginbotham Apr 12 2011, 02:42 PM

"Tag is deserving and such for this wonderful award. He rightfully earned the title of greatest racer in the- HAHAHAHAHAHA! SUCKERS! YOU CANNOT MAKE THE ESPRE- *is sidetackled*"

-Espresso, ModNation Racers

Posted by: Judge Gabranth Apr 12 2011, 02:59 PM

"Zombies are like my ex wife; Give them a beating and they'll come back for more!"
"Gee, I wonder why she's your EX?"

Oh god madworld had such great announcers

Posted by: Shinzu Apr 12 2011, 10:56 PM

I may have posted here before, but I just recently laughed so HARD because of Assassin's Creed!

'Ezio, don't you recognize me? It'sa me, Mario!'

I still crack up when I hear that. XD

Posted by: Dr Higginbotham Apr 13 2011, 02:08 PM

Haggis McMutton: Me given name is 'Heart-Liver-And-Kidneys-Boiled-In-The-Stomach-Of-The-Animal McMutton.'
Guybrush Threepwood: Oh, so your parents were expecting a girl, then.
Haggis McMutton: Aye.

Watch this video and you'll regret it: http://www.gametrailers.com/user-movie/ooh-innuendo/288112