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Let's break the stigma of mental illness together, We exist, we are here and we want to be respected
LucarioGirl
post Sep 29 2017, 07:20 PM
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QUOTE(Gryphaena @ Aug 23 2017, 10:41 AM) *
Hello LucarioGirl!

My second therapist and second psychiatrist both thought I was on the autism spectrum and I think I agree, so I think I can relate to feeling wierd, I too, knew I was different than other people.

I was picked on when I was younger as well.

Instead of OCD and resistant eating, I have depression with psychotic features and am pre-diabetic.

I was only employed once, and I think it was because the people conducting the interview for that job knew me already, so that's why it was so easy.

I also like being on the computer, but I cannot stand an indoors job. I need to be outside working with plants or I'll get bored.

I have to be moving or I start feeling sleepy.

Do you have any people you feel comfortable around?

My clinic was wise enough to start social skills groups for us so we could socialize with other people with mental illnesses.

I was even fortunate to be able to make some shallow friendships who I still see on campus and say "Hi" to.

I am sorry you were once locked in a trunk, that is a cruel thing to do in my opinion.


Thanks. I'm starting to get out a bit more now that I've moved to a new place. Pokemon Go has actually given me the opportunity to talk to people when I wouldn't normally be willing to try. It's a small step, but a step nonetheless.

Also, with the car trunk, I accidentally locked myself in there. I thought it would be a good hiding place for hide-and-seek, and I didn't realize until I was in there that I couldn't get out. I'd also locked the keys in the car with me, but they were on the back seat and I couldn't get them. My brother found me and got the spare keys, thank goodness.


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Gryphaena
post Oct 29 2017, 02:29 PM
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I don't know too many people who are still playing Pokemon Go, but it must be great exercise!

I hope everyone's experiences throughout the year are mostly positive.

I'm coping with grief by writing.

There was a day three weeks ago when I felt inspired and wrote poems for some of my Facebook people.

That was fun!


May I ask what coping strategies you use?


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LucarioGirl
post Oct 29 2017, 11:21 PM
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I usually just try to stay away from anything that might set me off. It's hard, though; the biggest things are food smells and small children. That's part of why it was so difficult to get a job back in my old hometown; it's a small town, and pretty much everyone's first job was at the grocery store.

I'm an extremely picker eater because when I smell something, I also taste it a little, and I usually don't like it. I'm even nervous about trying new foods that don't smell. Touching food that I don't acknowledge as mine, even if it's wrapped up, sends me running to the bathroom to scrub my hands afterwards. And dirty dishes that aren't mine are a nightmare.

Kids are the absolute worst; no matter how far away I try to get, I can usually still hear them. The only coping mechanism I have isn't a very good one; I plug my ears as hard as I can and mutter to myself. Usually it's the mean things I want to say to the parents, but I can't because it'd be mean; things like 'shut that thing up'. Their voices are just physically painful to me until they hit puberty. And it's not just crying; even kids talking normally hurts.

On another note, why is it that when you say you hate kids, everyone looks at you like you're crazy? I hate kids because, intentionally or not, their presence is painful for me.

This post has been edited by LucarioGirl: Oct 29 2017, 11:24 PM


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Gryphaena
post Oct 30 2017, 08:09 AM
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Oh man, thank you for sharing, LucarioGirl.

It must be frustrating to have a section of the population be painful to you.

Would it help if you bought earplugs, maybe?

I have some that are supposed to decrease decibels by 25 decibels.

The brand is http://www.howardleight.com/

I've worn my earplugs at work and whenever any place I'm in is beginning to stress me out with noise.

It's working for me so far.


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Beauty Shannon
post Nov 13 2017, 04:29 AM
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I'm glad to see some awareness of this going around, I struggle with it myself.

I was a victim of domestic violence from birth until I was about 15 and it left me with some pretty bad emotional scars that I kept pretending didn't exist until the symptoms got nasty. I've always struggled with depression (not in the sadness of life sense, more of a laziness and procrastinating form) and severe anxiety because of it but I started to have pseudo seizures from the anxiety so I finally had to see a doctor.

I have a service dog who I bought and raised as a puppy who responds to my seizures, performs various odd tasks to help with my disability symptoms (blocking strangers from bumping me, guiding me to my car when I forget where I parked, reminding me to take pills etc) and he helps my anxiety by just being there as well.

Another symptom of mine is always feeling the need to justify myself, so although I'm glad that he's here to help me live my life easier, sometimes I also want to just leave him home because I don't like admitting to strangers that I have "anxiety" because it's a word so commonly thrown around and used. Everyone has "anxiety" today, so the people who are just stressed out have no idea what it's really like to have heart palpitations, ice cold blood and the feeling your stomach gets when you're on a roller coaster but at any given moment. They don't understand what it's like to be plagued by so many thoughts and emotions at once that you can't even remember which way you came into the mall or where your car is in a 5 story garage. They don't know what it's like to not be able to hold a conversation on the phone without freezing up and getting more and more petrified the longer you sit in silence because you realize it's awkward and embarrassing but you can't remember what to say or how to talk. I'm sure most people just think I'm being a baby and taking advantage of the system when they hear that I have a service dog for anxiety, but when I'm able to hear and see everything around me but I can't talk or communicate because I'm in my own nightmare of flailing and odd gasping sounds, he's very needed.



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Gryphaena
post Nov 13 2017, 01:26 PM
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Hello Beauty Shannon, thank you for sharing a slice of your story.

I am glad that there are fellow users here who feel comfortable using this thread and I hope we can all support each other.

Thank you for the picture of you and your service dog as well!

I do not think I have anxiety, although, there was one time when my heart was beating amazingly fast and I didn't know what was going on. Perhaps that was a mini panic attack?

I'm glad that you are receiving some help you need.

Shame on those people that pretend to have a service dog or therapy dog, I think they just help spread suspicion to everyone else who has a documented need for them.

I don't disclose my health conditions to everyone around me either but sometimes I start stimming and I've let classmates that I think will be understanding know.


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LucarioGirl
post Dec 1 2017, 10:52 PM
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You know, I don't know what's worse; people who lie about needing service dogs, or people who assume that people are lying about needing service dogs, usually out of some stupid old-fashioned belief that service dogs are only for blind people. On one hand, people who lie make things worse for the people like Beauty Shannon with a genuine need. On the other hand, I've heard crazy stories, including one where a woman was dragged out of a store by security because she assumed a disabled person was lying about their dog being a service dog because she wasn't blind and tried to steal the dog from her because she was 'stealing a service dog from a blind person'. They're both awful, and they both hinder people that really need them, but I can't decide which of them is more horrible.

This post has been edited by LucarioGirl: Dec 1 2017, 10:53 PM


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Gryphaena
post Dec 3 2017, 08:58 PM
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You're right, it is too bad that people pretend their pets are service animals and it is too bad that some people still think service animals are only for blind folks.

Maybe if there was more education and less rascally people in the world.


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Rallaa
post Dec 6 2017, 04:54 PM
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I don't think I suffer from any mental illness myself.
But my girlfriend's stepdad does. He has visual and auditory hallucinations, with aggression issues to go along with it.

@LucarioGirl, I also dislike kids.
I disliked kids even when I was a kid myself. Not other kids my age, just anyone younger than me.
I think it's cuz when I was in pre-school, they would let the youngest ones out of their play pen to roam around for a bit every day, and the little snots would always come knock my blocks over. Ever since then I've been generally annoyed by anyone younger than myself.


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Gryphaena
post Dec 11 2017, 09:35 AM
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Hello Rallaa, perhaps I should edit my first post and say that people with family members who have a mental illness are welcome to post here as well.

As long as everyone knows that we cannot give any medical or therapeutic help since none of us are certified (or at least I don't think any of us are).


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MrSmiles
post Dec 26 2017, 11:03 PM
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So it looks like this has been quiet for a few weeks... Hope it's okay if I post here.

I was diagnosed as a high functioning autistic when I was very young. There was much debate on whether I had Aspergers or autism, but it was determined that I fell more on the autistic side of the spectrum. They did say in all honesty that I should be on a different spectrum all together that autism and Aspergers didn't quite explain completely what was wrong with me. Basically I need my own spectrum. I have usual stuff with autism such as anxiety (mainly social) and struggling with eye contact and an attention deficit, but I'm not obsessive and I understand sarcasm and I can pick up on social and emotional cues that others with autism can't. And I have a high IQ. I've had issues with people being ignorant about these things. My first interaction with an ignorant person was actually with one of my first psychologists. You see when I first was getting diagnosed autism wasn't as widely accepted as it is now, and some people, even people with psych degrees, did not believe it was an actual thing. So yeah, not a great experience growing up. I had a lot of issues with my teachers back then. Not because I couldn't keep up, but because of my mild OCPD and not so mild ADHD. I would finish the work before everyone in class, but because the class wasn't really equipped for kids with ADHD I sort of pestered the other kids while they were trying to work. Like rearranged their colored pencils (OCPD aspect) and told them they were solving the problems wrong (because I was smarter than them and mildly combative. I know that sounds rude, but yeah...) It wasn't till fifth grade that I actually was in a class with in classroom library. So when I finished my work, I went and read and that actually kept me from causing "mischief". It was actually one of my first teachers who had called my mom basically telling her that something was wrong with me that started the process of me getting diagnosed. And here is something that really ticks me off that ignorant people do, using stereotypes and completely mixing up specific disabilities. Down Syndrome is not autism. Autism has nothing to due with chromosomes. In fact it still isn't quite clear what causes autism because there are so many outside causes and there are people who get it later in life who were not born with it. I wasn't born with it either. Sorry mild rant. I also hate it when people use the word "retard" and think it is politically correct. It is not. In fact it is an extremely offensive slur and should not be used.

I really feel that because of what happened to me is part of why I ended up with depression in 8th grade. I was actually suicidal and admitted into a hospital for awhile. I'm not suicidal anymore, but I still have depression. That's not going to change. I just did not have such a great childhood.

In regards to medication, I stopped taking my antidepressants and ADHD meds after high school because they were making me sick and I didn't feel I needed them so much anymore. I also read that my antidepressant had high levels of fluoride in it and some people had to have their stomachs pumped because of fluoride poisoning while on it. Also there where some other side effects that I was not comfortable with. If I do feel like I need help, I take natural supplements now. Same effect minus all the chemicals being put in my body.

So that's it mostly.


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Gryphaena
post Dec 27 2017, 01:43 AM
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Hello MrSmiles, welcome to my thread!

I think it's interesting how so many disorders come with other ones as well.

It's interesting that you use natural supplements instead of prescribed medication, but if that works for you, who am I to judge?

I'm glad that you're not suicidal anymore.


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MrSmiles
post Dec 27 2017, 10:22 PM
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Thanks.

Yeah, autism really is one of those "compound" disabilities that have all these other things mixed in. It can be frustrating sometimes though having all these things bunched together in one disability. Sometimes I wish I could pick and choose. Like "I don't want to be anxious today. *turns anxiety off with a flip of a switch*" Things would be so much easier. Sadly life is not like that. And recently I feel like I might have mild agoraphobia. I haven't ever been officially diagnosed, but it feels like my social anxiety is getting worse in certain cases to the point where I don't think it can actually be considered as just social anxiety. Just wish I didn't feel this way most of the time.

You can get natural supplements prescribed, but most have over the counter version also that are cheaper. I usually talk to my Psychologist about ones they'd recommend for depression. I just really can't handle all the things found in most medications. They always make me feel bad physically.

Sorry, I read through some of the earlier posts, but aren't Seeing Eye Dogs and service dogs a little different? They receive similar training of course, but one is better equipped for someone who is blind. I always viewed them as two separate things. Service dogs had a wider range of jobs while Seeing Eye dogs were strictly for the blind. Or do they lump them both in the same category now? Or is it just people being ignorant again? I don't know. I also know that dogs are better equipped for people with physical disabilities because they are larger so it really isn't just blind people who would need service dogs... I met this vet once in Half Price Books. He had received some damage to his spine during his service and he couldn't walk that well after the damage. He had a large service dog to help him walk. She was quipped with this harness that had this handle like a walker has (don't know a better way to describe it) so he could hold onto it and lean on her so he could stand and walk. Also if he fell and couldn't get up she was trained to call for help.
There is also a wider variety of service animals other than dogs such as service felines and service monkeys. Cats also have been considered helpful for the blind because of their slightly pushy nature. Have you seen the video of the cat leading the blind dog?
Regarding people using their pets as fake service animals, real service animals actually have badges and special IDs to go on their vests. Each vest also is a different color and usually says if they are in training or finished their training. I actually know people who train service animals and the little trainees always have their trainee vests on and their badges attached to them. I just find it odd that someone would mix a fake service animal for a real one because of this. It also makes it kind of hard to lie about having a service animal because service animals who are on duty must have their vest and ID on or at least their ID in the case of service cats. Not all service cats have vests. Most service cats have special carriers though with a slot for their IDs. It is troublesome that people are trying to lie about having a service animal. People also need to stop making such a fuss about people having service animals. There is this video of a lady who decided to harass a veteran about his service dog being in a restaurant. She kept ranting about how it was unsanitary and how he shouldn't bring "disgusting" animals into a place where you eat food. It really is awful how people treat other who just need a little extra help.
And a little off topic and more of a ramble, my anxiety actually is bad enough that I qualify for a service animal.


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Gryphaena
post Jun 8 2018, 04:08 PM
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How is everyone else doing?

My dosage of medication was raised, I think I've adjusted to it.

I think I'm in a stable state of mind now.

2018 started with a grief train for me.

Family and friends died in the first three months of the year.

I was crying so much that I thought I'd go numb.

Writing really helped.

Along with talking to my therapist.

Man, I don't know what would have happened if I didn't have her.





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syllabub penguin
post Jun 20 2018, 03:53 PM
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I have anxiety disorder. It makes doing things that are simple like crossing the street and ordering food in-person hard for me. I manage through various coping techniques but not all of them are healthy. I'm trying this year to break the unhealthy traits of mine and to improve my condition. However, for the most part, my life is good.


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Gryphaena
post Jun 20 2018, 04:14 PM
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Hello lonelyTroubadour, welcome to another of my threads!

I don't know if I have anxiety, but I do know that I have very little confidence in my own decision making.

It's great that you have goals to better yourself.

I hope we all can have goals that give us a purpose to strive for.


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syllabub penguin
post Jun 20 2018, 06:15 PM
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Haha, we seem to be running into each other a lot. Goals are good when combating the effects of mental illness as they keep you on track, not just sitting there suffering. I find that having goals, even small ones, greatly improves my quality of life.


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Gryphaena
post Sep 15 2018, 05:08 PM
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That's a good point, if one has goals to work towards, then one can feel they have a purpose.

What does everyone do for self-care?

I try to remember to eat and sleep every day along with something fun after I finish school.

I usually listen to music and play games or write.

And bathing. Gotta remember to do that.


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Almalexia
post Sep 15 2018, 11:32 PM
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i was diagnosed with depression and social anxiety at age 12. i'm 25 now, and some days it feels like it's just been getting worse.

then there's the untreated adhd that keeps me from getting ANYTHING important done.

i've also been diagnosed with borderline personality disorder and bipolar disorder, but my medication has it under control. sometimes the symptoms rear their ugly heads again but it's nowhere near as awful as it used to be. so there's that, lol

i'm really trying to make things better for myself though. been putting myself out there, looking for jobs and such to face my social anxiety (which has prevented me from getting jobs in the past). i think i'm a lot more comfortable with speaking to strangers now, but i still need my meds beforehand because it can still be very nervewracking for me depending on who it's with.


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LucarioGirl
post Sep 16 2018, 02:48 AM
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Haven't been here in a while. Nice to see more people feeling comfortable enough to talk about these things. Also, MrSmiles, as a medical student, the last part of your first post made me a little nervous. The big problem with antidepressants is that we have yet to find a way to make them work faster. Even the fastest-acting ones take 2-3 weeks to kick in. This leads to way too many horror stories about people taking antidepressants, feeling uncomfortable with the side-effects, feeling like they aren't working, suddenly stopping taking them, and ending up feeling worse than before. It seems like it worked out for you, which is a huge relief.

To anyone who is in this situation, please NEVER abruptly stop taking the drugs. Consult your doctor, work with them to find something that works for you, and ease into it slowly. We get it; there's no one universal treatment that works for everyone. But these drugs are explicitly made to mess with your head to help you feel better. Always be careful with any kind of medication, but especially antidepressants. They're still not as reliable as we would like them to be.


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