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Born Gay/Straight/Bi, Are you born or turned that way?
Stark Coyote
post Feb 27 2011, 02:07 PM
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People always say they are usually turned gay or they are born gay.

Are they both right or both wrong?

I am a gay male, and I will say I was born this way. I have always liked males in that way, and I would always be like that towards males.

People also say, they chose to be gay, Why would you want to be Gay? We gays are always put down and stereotyped! I am proud to be gay but as I said before, Why would you choose to be gay.


So the Topic is, Are you BORN Gay/Straight or are you Turned/Chose to be Gay/Straight?

DISCUSS


This post has been edited by Squirtle Squad: Feb 27 2011, 03:16 PM


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Yamper
post Feb 27 2011, 02:27 PM
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Not born... more nature and nurture.

This post has been edited by Starships: Feb 25 2012, 06:18 AM


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Mercury Black
post Feb 27 2011, 02:48 PM
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I don't think you can set it to "Born" or "made" for everyone. Everyone has different reasons for being gay, straight, bi or asexual. Some people have always been attracted to a certain gender. Other people may have an outside effect that change their views and feelings. Some people just fall in-love no matter what gender even if they hadn't felt that way for that certain gender before.


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DJ Majja Kool
post Feb 27 2011, 02:55 PM
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I've heard that the hypothalamus (part of the brain) is what determines sexuality (and a video we watched in class even outright stated it). Myself not being a hypothalamus of course, but it makes sense.

Either way, I certainly don't think it's a choice, having heard about the struggles of many, having seen their tears and other strong feelings. I know that I don't choose not to be attracted to either sex (or anything else), I just don't feel it.

This post has been edited by StrawberryLoveIntervention: Feb 27 2011, 02:57 PM


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SnowWhite
post Feb 28 2011, 05:24 PM
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I don't think you have the right to "choose" your sexuality. The most I see about openly gay people, is that they go through a lot, both to be taken seriously and TO BE TRATED AS HUMAN BEINGS. Why would you wanna CHOOSE to go through that?
'Cause seriously, at lest in my country, saying "You're gay" is considered an insult. Straight people think being called gay is an insult.

Hell yeah, if someone were to tell me "You're gay", I'd say "So what? You're an idiot, and at least I can be proud of who I am"

But to answer the topic of discussion, because I'm told I shouldn't off-topic, the heart of the matter is: you don't choose who you love. And if that goes for age, it goes for gender too. I think "people who turned gay" didn't really TURN per se. They accepted they were gay all along. They finally stopped denying it to themselves.



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DJ Majja Kool
post Feb 28 2011, 05:48 PM
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QUOTE(SnowWhite @ Feb 28 2011, 05:24 PM) *
I think "people who turned gay" didn't really TURN per se. They accepted they were gay all along. They finally stopped denying it to themselves.

There are also those who become sad or angry by breakups or problems with the opposite sex that say "Ok, I'm going gay." and try to pursue relationships with other boys/girls thinking they can "turn gay". I had a friend whose brother said and did exactly that.

This post has been edited by StrawberryLoveIntervention: Feb 28 2011, 05:51 PM


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SnowWhite
post Feb 28 2011, 06:03 PM
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Well, did it work?
It has never made much difference to me if the subject of my affection were a boy or a girl, so I'm not the best person to talk about "preferences"... But did he really turn gay? As in, started to feel attraction for the same sex?


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DJ Majja Kool
post Feb 28 2011, 06:39 PM
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I can't say for sure, not knowing him that well and no longer being in contact with either of them, but I personally don't believe so considering the circumstances. I think it was just desperation to be in a relationship (or he could have been experimenting, so to speak), like how some prisoners start relationships with fellow prisoners but go back to the opposite sex once they're released.

This post has been edited by StrawberryLoveIntervention: Feb 28 2011, 06:42 PM


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SnowWhite
post Feb 28 2011, 07:03 PM
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Makes sense... I mean, sorta xD

Anyway it just proves my point about not being a matter of choice. I mean, even if you want to experiment, it doesn't mean you become gay or whatever. It just means you're sexually curious.
But I don't think turning your eyes into the opposite or the same sex should work as escaping from the sadness of your real life xD

Anyway, we all have the right to accept youselves. I, myself, don't like to be called anything. It's better like that. It's freeing to feel no boundries from the name people give you or the way they see you in your sexuality.
That stuff's too fluid, too sensitive, to be rotulated.


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Godamn Robot
post Feb 28 2011, 07:08 PM
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It's a deep psycologiacl conflict with ones sexuallity , I personally think that someone is born gay, but I wouldn't know for sure.


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Hitaka5Ever
post Mar 6 2011, 05:51 AM
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My sisters, mum, and I all believe that you are born gay, but I can see non-gays becoming gay, but rarely
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post Mar 6 2011, 08:08 AM
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I believe you are turned towards a certain sexuality based on the variables of life (surroundings, people, environments, television, etc.) and these evidently aid the choices you make and create whom you are as a person - as well as change your reaction to certain things, just like all other things in life. Say for example with food, if you get swayed into loving bitter food but dislike sweet foods, the same could be same with being either homosexual or heterosexual - from seeing two men share a passionate romance on television could give you ideas on what life is meant to be like for you, especially if you see it at such a young age.
I would also like to comment on what you said before about homosexuals being "put down", ALL forms of sexuality get insulted in one way or another, please do not think you are any worse of a human because you chose something different from others.
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Cloud Nine
post Dec 4 2011, 03:42 PM
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This is a debate I'm willing to get into.
I've discussed this many times in my classes, such as Psychology.
I do not believe you can be placed directly into 'Born' or 'Made' homosexual.
There are many factors that contribute to everybody's life.
Some people are born believing they are, for example; 'A man trapped in a woman's body' and the opposite way too.
However some people grow up believing they are heterosexual, however some factor, whether it be a night of drunken experimentation or the way your parents raised you, that could 'create' a homosexual.

It all adds to the nature/nurture debate really. I don't really believe in accepting just one view. It's all a tad reductionist if you ask me.
Somebody I know was in a relationship for almost a year, until recently when he broke up with the girlfriend, because he realised he was asexual. However now he seems conflicted with asexuality and homosexuality.
Was he born asexual, or did something change over time?


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Reyo
post Dec 4 2011, 05:47 PM
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QUOTE(StrawberryLoveIntervention @ Feb 27 2011, 03:55 PM) *
I've heard that the hypothalamus (part of the brain) is what determines sexuality (and a video we watched in class even outright stated it). Myself not being a hypothalamus of course, but it makes sense.

Either way, I certainly don't think it's a choice, having heard about the struggles of many, having seen their tears and other strong feelings. I know that I don't choose not to be attracted to either sex (or anything else), I just don't feel it.


You're not too far off on your hypothalamus comment.

http://www.cerebromente.org.br/n03/mente/hormones_i.htm

Scientists have found, basically, that a larger hypothalamus is indicative of an attraction to women, and a smaller hypothalamus is indicative of an attraction to men. Not sure if this is discussed by the same topic, but that specific attraction is to female urine and male sweat. (I may have just got that off of animal planet...somehow)


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post Jan 3 2012, 01:42 AM
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well i think everyone's got a choice.......

what matters is how you choose.....

you can be happy with anyone you love and you can fall in love with anyone you want.....

for some it happens at the first sight and for some the same lov comes after years of understanding eachother.......

so u always have a choice..... happy.gif


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Ryuko
post Jan 3 2012, 08:58 AM
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It's our state of mind. As we develope, so does our own perspective. Our surroundings depict our initial perspective and we mature believing what we grew up with is true. I will admit that I idolized my mother when I was younger, her view on everything became mine. 'Twas not only until in the past years that I found all the things I onced believed to be false, thus reinforcing my point.

I don't believe it comes down to a matter of choice and genes, because I cannot simply believed that someone 'decides' one day that they are attracted to the opposite sex. Nor will I accept that your genetics depict your sexuality. My best friend is the youngest of three sisters. The eldest is a lesbian, the middle child is bisexual and she is straight until proven wrong. Does mean that she carries the 'gay gene'? No. Both her sisters were brought up by a mother who has had many partners at that time, and were at an all-girls school.

So in conclusion, it's a matter of ones' perspective.


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Lokiva
post Jan 20 2012, 02:12 PM
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I agree with the fact that one is born gay, but with how people are pressured to /not be gay/ throughout their childhood years I believe people can get confused halfway through life. Right now, I cannot tell whether or not I am attracted to girls or guys because I have been pressured by my society (Catholic schools/family) to like men, but there are some women who I think I might be attracted to. I am confused, but I know that I would accept either path should that prove to be what I actually am.


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post Jan 28 2012, 10:37 AM
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http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Biology_and_sexual_orientation

tl;dr there are a lot of factors, and studies have strongly suggested genetics is a part of it, i.e. you dont choose


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Dazmi
post Jan 28 2012, 01:21 PM
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I don`t choose my sexual orientation, my dick does. I get erect over guys, but not girls. There, simple as that.


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The Grouch
post Jan 31 2012, 10:54 AM
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Lol, nicely put there.

Being gay is a mindset, a preference like many people had noted before me. Mindsets and preferences develop over time. Like that one time I used to hate salt and vinegar potato chips, but now I absolutely love them. Your mindset develops, so you can't really be born gay. You don't really have an actually mindset then, it just isn't possible. All your brain thinks of then is, food, drink, mommy's tits, sleep, shit, cry, piss, sleep, cry, shit, food, mommy's tits, drink, shit, cry. The environment in which someone is raised could have something to do with it, but my environment didn't make me like chips. You really just find out and decide that you find the same sex more appealing than the opposite, and there's nothing wrong with that.


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